From: "Ian and Tiff" <iangr@email.msn.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Midnight Stroll - 1/1 by Tiffany
Date: 01 Oct 1998 03:48:34 -0700

Title: Midnight Stroll - 1/1
Author: Tiffany Gregg
E-Mail: iangr@msn.com
Distribution: If you like; just let me know, please.
Rating: PG-13
Spoiler Warning: Thru B2
Feedback: Would be most appreciated
Summary: Buffy and Spike meet up outside the Bronze and he walks her home.

Disclaimer: The characters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to Joss
Whedon, the WB, FOX and Mutant Enemy.  I am making no money in writing this
and no copyright infringement is intended.

Authors note: This piece takes up right where "Masquerade" leaves off.  If
you haven't read "Masquerade" yet, some of this might not make sense.

==========

Midnight Stroll
By: Tiffany
E-Mail me at: iangr@msn.com


Every ounce of his being longed to hold her in his arms again, to kiss her
soft lips.  Her pulse had raced when he'd held her close and when he'd
kissed her.  She had been attracted to him, he had sensed it.  But she
didn't know who 'he' was at the time.  Would that make a difference?  Could
she ever look past the demon and see the man?

The Slayer, that damn bloody Slayer.  Her scent was still assaulting his
nostrils.  He couldn't think straight because he couldn't stop thinking
about her.  Frustrated, Spike sighed deeply and looked up towards the
heavens again.  As if the stars held the answer to his troubles.

A voice shook him from his reverie.

"This isn't exactly a safe place to be loitering this time of night."

It was her.  The Slayer.

"I can take care of myself" he replied <God, that was a stupid thing to say>

"Oh, well, I wasn't implying that you couldn't.  I just, well this is a bad
neighborhood.  And well, there are bad, um, things around." she said
hastily

<Yeah, and you looking at one of them> "If this is such a bad neighborhood,
what are you doing out here alone?" he questioned with a grin, knowing full
well that she'd probably come out to hunt.

"I, uh, needed some air." came her reply. <And slay a few vamps> she added
to herself

"Can I walk you home, S....Seven?" the question surprised Spike almost as
much as it did Buffy.

"Okay." She held her hand out to him "My name is Buffy, by the way.  What
should I call you?"

"Zorro, will do for tonight" he countered with a heart stopping grin and
shook her hand.

They walked in silence.  Each sneaking glimpses at the other along the way.
Spike could contain his urge to touch her no more and he reached out and
grabbed her hand.  Buffy jumped a little at first then twined her fingers in
his and smiled at him.

Spike's thoughts drifted once again to the Slayer as they walked
hand-in-hand down the streets of Sunnydale.  He thought of the fights they'd
had, of their brief alliance to defeat Angelus, of meeting her mom <she's
hell on the 'ol skins, he'd told her>.

Buffy silently wondered to herself who this mystery guy was.  He seemed so
familiar to her, but then the thought would be gone.  She was definitely
attracted to him.  He was an amazing dancer, so light on his feet.  She
fingered the rose that he'd given her after their 'dance' and smiled.

Spike noticed her smiling to herself and wondered if she was thinking of
him.  "What's so funny" he asked.  "Nothing funny.  I was just thinking of
dancing with you" she replied honestly.  Spike's heart soared and he
couldn't help the grin that spread across his face as he gave her hand a
little squeeze.

"Well, here we are.  Home sweet home." Buffy stated as they reached her
house.

"Here we are." Spike repeated

"Well, I really had a good time tonight dancing with you...Zorro" she said
with a grin and then added "Thanks for walking me home."

"My pleasure, on both accounts Luv.....ely lady" <nice save, Spike 'ol boy>

"Well, I best get inside before my mom starts turning on the light and
peeking out the window." <kiss me, kiss me, kiss me, please, please, please>
she added to herself.

Spike just stood there, a little unsure as to what he should do.  Should he
just say goodnight, should he hug her, should he kiss her.

<What the hell> Buffy thought to herself as she leaned in, stretched to her
tiptoes and gave him a quick kiss.  She said "Goodnight" and turned toward
the door.

As she turned, Spike caught her shoulder and pulled her into his embrace.
He bent his head down and captured her mouth with his in a deep kiss.  But
this time it was her tongue that swept past his lips.  He was a little
surprised at her boldness, but none the less pleased.  Her hands roamed over
his back.  Spreading flames every place that they touched.  Every fiber of
his being tingled at her nearness, her warmth, her scent, her taste.  He
never wanted this moment to end.

Buffy felt the same way.  His touch was electric, like little static shocks
when he touched her.  Once again, her stomach clenched with desire for the
man standing before her.  She felt a little 'ho-like for getting so personal
and not even knowing his name, but she didn't care.  He was amazing.

Just then, the porch light came on, causing both of them to jump a little
and then laugh.

"Guess we've been busted" Buffy quipped "Guess I should really be getting
inside."

"Will I ever see you again?" she added expectantly

"If you'd like." he replied with a little smile

"I would." she added with a smile of her own

"Well, until then..." he said as he bowed and gave her hand a quick kiss.
And with that he jumped down from the porch and disappeared into the night.

=========

Spike sat on the park bench silently looking back up at the stars.  Seemed
like he'd been doing that a lot lately.  The Slayer filled his mind.  She's
kissed 'him'.  He still couldn't believe it, but it was true.  Maybe there
was hope yet, maybe she wouldn't run or worse try to kill him when he
revealed his true self.  But he wouldn't worry about that tonight.  No
tonight he would bask in the warmth of her memory.  The memory of the feel
of her lips on his, her hands roaming his back, her scent filling his
nostrils.  Tonight she was his.

=========

The End...?





















-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Aglx@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (21/25)
Date: 01 Oct 1998 14:53:20 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (21/25)
Author: AnGeL X (Aglx@aol.com)
Distrbution: Just Ask & Keep my name attached!
Spoilers: Takes place after Becoming
Rating: PG/PG-13 Violence.
Description: Buffy/Angel Love Story.
Disclaimer: Plot Mine. Characters all but Savarah are mine!
I own nothing that's really Buffy, never will, don't sue. 
Feedback: I live for it. I also refuse to write without it!

Yes, I finally finished and I'll be slowly putting the final pieces out.
But I need feedback. All my recent stories have been what I guess
to be flops since I recieved very little feedback. Oh well. ( : I'm posting
this without the help of my editor (who's been so wonderful, helping me
with the rest of the story), so be nice!

If you've never read this story before, or have forgotten what 
last happened, please check out the rest of the story archived at:
http://www.geocities.com/TelevisionCity/Studio/5720/lr1.html

~~~~

	"I just love what you guys have done with the place since 
I've been gone!" Angel said, his dark figure slowly became visible 
in the moonlight.  Buffy followed closely in after.
	"Doesn't anyone bloody knock anymore?!" Spike was sitting 
at the table with Dru at his side. They were feasting off a couple 
of teenagers.
	"Knocking is so passé Spike." Buffy said as she ran her 
finger over a dusty crate.  
	"Spike, my boy, you really should up your security. It's 
pathetic!"
	"You two wouldn't have a reason for disturbing our dinner,
would you?"
	"Actually, we thought me might join you." Angel said, 
cockily.  Buffy wasn't amused by Angel's attempt to make a joke 
but she kept it hidden.
	"Oh, yeah, you draw blood from a human. That I've got to 
see!"
	"But really, we've got a little favor to ask of you."
	"She's not here." Drusilla chimed up from behind the 
body of one of her victims. She was concentrating on the boy in 
front of her and refused to look Angel in the eye.
	"Who pet?" Spike asked.
	"Where is she, Dru?" Angel said. He placed his hands down 
on the table and leaned in closer to her.
	"Savarah's waiting. She's waiting for you."  Dru finally
looked up at Angel and smiled.
	"We know that! How can we find her?" Buffy said rushing
up to them.
	Spike stood up to block Buffy from getting any closer.
"Am I the only one who sees a problem with this picture?" 
	"Spike, get *out* of my way. Right now, you're not our 
problem, but you sure are working your way there!"  Buffy pushed 
him aside and made her way to Angel.
	"Dru, how do we contact her?!"  Angel said growing 
annoyed.
	"Shhh." Dru placed a finger upon her lips. "It's a 
secret," she said, her smile widening.  
	Spike began laughing. Drusilla obviously didn't know 
how to contact with Savarah but she sure did know how to annoy 
Angel.
	Angel slammed his hands down on the table and yelled out.
He was frustrated with Drusilla's constant games.  Without even
thinking, Angel flew over the table, knocking Drusilla to the 
ground. 
	Spike's smile faded as he jumped over to save his lover.
Buffy was stunned by Angel's action but still managed to stop
Spike from interfering.  The two started a battle of their own,
throwing eachother across the large room.
	He threw a few hard punches at her, hopefully getting his 
message across.  Drusilla lashed out with her nails, clawing at 
anything within reaching distance.  She pulled her knees up and
putting her strength to good use, she sent Angel flying. He landed
painfully on the table.  As he rolled of, he landed on a chair, 
smashing it to pieces. 
	Spike let out a cry as Buffy smashed his knee with the heel
of her foot.  He crumbled to the ground and Drusilla quickly rose 
to her feet and started towards Buffy.  With her back turned, Buffy
lifted a stake from inside her sleeve and plunged it deep into 
Drusilla's gut as she flew at her. 
	Her eyes opened wide and looked down for a quick glance at
the stake protruding from her before she disappeared into ashes.
	Spike froze for a second, letting the horror sink in.  He 
pushed past Buffy and clawed his way towards his lover's remains.  
	Buffy rushed towards the door but stopped when she realized
Angel wasn't following. He was more horrified than Spike. "Angel!"
He looked back at her then quickly moved to her. The two ran out of 
the building not encountering a single vampire on the way out.

~~~~
Don't you just love it when I kill characters?

-Michelle
Author of: "The Dark One," "Love's Revival," "Vengeance," "Lost & Found,"
"Deadly Instincts," "The Soul of Good & Evil," "Sorrowful Regrets," "Can I 
Love Again?" and "My Past, Your Future."



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Ian and Tiff" <iangr@email.msn.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Truth Be Known - 1/1 by Tiffany
Date: 02 Oct 1998 00:24:06 -0700

Title: Truth Be Known - 1/1
Author: Tiffany Gregg
E-Mail: iangr@msn.com
Distribution: If you like; just let me know, please.
Rating: PG-13
Spoiler Warning: Thru B2
Feedback: Would be most appreciated
Classification: BSR/Angst
Summary: Buffy learns the true identity of her masked admirer.

Disclaimer: The characters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to Joss
Whedon, the WB, FOX and Mutant Enemy.  I am making no money in writing this
and no copyright infringement is intended.

Authors note: This is the 3rd part in my "Masquerade" series.  If you
haven't read Masquerade or Midnight Stroll yet, some of this might not make
sense.

==========

Truth Be Known
By: Tiffany
E-Mail me at: iangr@msn.com


Buffy's heart sang as she patrolled.  Her mind kept drifting back to her
masked admirer.  For the first time in a long time, she felt giddy with
joy.  She smiled as she remembered the look of surprise in his eyes when
she'd kissed him on her porch.  She shivered a little as she remembered the
way his lips felt on hers, the tenderness of his embrace and the passion in
his eyes.  Those beautiful eyes of his that seemed so familiar to her, but
she still couldn't place.

Buffy's heart stopped singing and skipped a beat when she noticed who was
sitting on the park bench ahead of her.  It was him.  She was shocked to
find him here.  He was looking up at the stars and seemed to be deep in
thought.  Buffy slowly approached the bench.

As if he could sense her presence, he looked up and smiled at her.  She
returned the smile.  He made a sweeping gesture with his arm inviting her to
sit with him and she obliged.

"Fancy meeting you here" he said with a smile.

"Like wise" she replied "You looked like you were having some deep thoughts"

"I was" he stated, obviously still thinking

"Anything special?" she pressed

Spike looked over at her and sighed.  "You" he stated barely above a
whisper.

"Me?" she echoed as a grin spread across her face

He nodded and closed his eyes.  His senses were filled once again with the
woman at his side.  He knew that he needed to end the masquerade, he needed
to tell her the truth.  He had to be honest with her, he needed to reveal
himself to her and hope that she would give him a chance.

With a low groan he reached for her, whispering her name as he pulled her
into his embrace.  His lips found hers and he kissed her with all the
longing and desperation that he was feeling.  He knew deep in his heart that
this would probably be the last time he kissed her.  In a few minutes she
would either run screaming from him or put a stake in his heart.

Buffy pulled back from the kiss, confusion and concern evident in her
expression.  "Who are you?"

"Someone who loves you, even though he shouldn't" he replied, unable to meet
her eyes.

"Loves me?  You don't even know me."

"Ah, but I do Luv" he replied meeting her gaze this time

Buffy locked eyes with his, confusion turning to recognition, recognition
turning to bewilderment.  "No, it can't be.  It just can't" she said shaking
her head slowly.

"I'm sorry" he said as he removed his hat and mask.

"Spike..." she whispered "Why?"

"I already told you, pet.  I love you.  I had to see you again."

"No, I don't believe you.  You left town with that 'ho girlfriend of yours
and left me for dead at the mansion.  You're lying."  Anger boiled to the
surface as her masked admirer dissolved into that of her mortal enemy.

She lept from the bench, pulled a stake from it's sheath and assumed her
fighting stance.

Spike shook his head.  "I don't want to fight you, can't you see that.  I'm
not trying to trick you and I don't want to hurt you.  I just wanted to see
you."

Buffy's eyes brimmed with tears.  "Liar!  I bet you're pretty happy with
yourself for fooling me like that huh?  I bet you and all your vamp buddies
are having a good 'ol laugh at my expense." she ground out before turning
and running away.

Spike closed his eyes and clenched his fits.  "Damn it to bloody hell" he
muttered.  He'd hurt her, made her cry.  He knew he should have never come
back.  Anguish overcame him and he screamed into the night to try and ease
the ache in his heart.

============

Buffy laid curled in her bed clutching Mr. Gordo to her chest.  Why, why had
he done that to her?  And more so than that, why was she so hurt by it?  Her
mind kept replaying parts of the night.  Their dance, their first kiss, him
walking her home, their kiss goodnight on the porch.  He'd been so gentle,
so caring.  His kisses seemed genuine.  She knew that her feelings towards
him had been.  She was attracted to him and wanted him.  Hell, she still was
even now that she knew who he was.  Maybe he wasn't lying.  Maybe he did
really care for her...?  <Get a grip, Buff!> she thought to herself.  <He's
a vamp, a demon, one of the bad guys...remember?>

She shook her head trying to clear the thoughts from her mind, but her
thoughts kept returning to Spike.  Sleep finally came and with it dreams of
him.

============

When Buffy awoke the next morning, the first thing that caught her eye was a
vase of red roses on her dresser.  The note simply stated "I'm sorry.
Please forgive me?"

============

The End...

















































-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Ian and Tiff" <iangr@email.msn.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Give Love A Chance - 1/1 by Tiffany
Date: 03 Oct 1998 01:47:25 -0700

Title: Give Love A Chance - 1/1
Author: Tiffany Gregg
E-Mail: iangr@msn.com
Distribution: If you like; just let me know, please.
Rating: PG-13
Spoiler Warning: Thru B2
Feedback: Would be most appreciated
Classification: BSR
Summary: Spike and Buffy meet up at the Bronze.  Will she give him a chance?

Disclaimer: The characters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to Joss
Whedon, the WB, FOX and Mutant Enemy.  I am making no money in writing this
and no copyright infringement is intended.

Authors note: This is the 4th part in my "Masquerade" series.  Also, the
song quoted in this piece is "(Everything I Do) I Do It For You" by Bryan
Adams

==========

Give Love A Chance
By: Tiffany
E-Mail me at: iangr@msn.com


He had given her three weeks to come to terms with her feelings.  Three long
weeks since he'd climbed in through her window to leave her the roses and
ask for her forgiveness.

He'd watched her for some time that night while she slept.  His heart ached
to hold her in his arms, touch her warm skin, and kiss her soft lips.  But
he
did none of those things.  He simply watched her and hoped that she could
find it in her heart to give him a chance, give his love for her a chance.

Spike had been very patient and kept his distance while he was waiting.
Patience was something that did not come easily for him, but he knew he
needed to give her some time, some space.  The time for being patient and
waiting was over, he couldn't take it an longer.

Tonight would be the night.  He knew she would be at the Bronze with her
friends.  He thought it seemed fitting that his last effort should be at the
place where it all started.  The place where he had first laid eyes upon
her.  Tonight, if she rejected him he had decided to cut his losses and go
back to Prague.  He hoped it wouldn't come down to that though.

=============

Buffy had been dancing with Xander when she spotted Spike.  He was lurking
in the shadows across the Bronze watching them.  Her heart jumped when she
saw him a mixture of anger and excitement spreading through her.

She told Xander "I've got something that I need to take care of.  I'll catch
up with you guys later.  Okay?"

Xander shrugged and said "Okie-dokie, Buff." and went to find Cordelia.

Buffy made her way across the Bronze to where Spike stood.  Her mind
raced as she walked over to him.  What should she do, what should she say.
She was still mad about being tricked, but at the same time she couldn't
stop thinking about him.

"Hello, Cutie." he said when she finally reached him.

"Ya' know, stalking is not really considered at turn-on." she spat.

"No?  Then why don't you tell me what is, Pet?" he shot right back at her.

Buffy was caught off guard by his reply and just stared at him for a minute.

Spike saw the opportunity that he needed.  "Dance with me?" he said.
"What?" came her confused reply.  "Dance.  You know, Luv.  Me, you, out
there" he said pointing to the dance floor.  "Just one dance?  What could it
hurt?" he prodded <Come on Slayer, yes, say yes> he silently begged to
himself.

"Okay.  But just one dance and that's it." she stated firmly.  "And don't
think of trying anything funny or you'll be meeting Mr. Pointy." she added.

As they headed out onto the dance floor a slow song started to play.  Spike
took Buffy very loosely in his arms.  He wanted to pull her close but
restrained himself.  He took a deep breath in and her scent filled his
nostrils.  He closed his eyes briefly to savor the moment.

Look into my eyes - you will see
What you mean to me
Search your heart - search your soul
And when you find me there you'll search no more

Spike opened his eyes to find Buffy staring at him.  He expected to find
bitterness in her eyes, but he didn't.  What he found was confusion laced
with longing.  Spike smiled at her and gave her a little wink.  Buffy
blushed a little and looked away.  She felt stupid for getting caught
staring at him. She couldn't help herself though, he was so damn good
looking and had the most captivating eyes.

Don't tell me it's not worth tryin' for
You can't tell me it's not worth dyin' for
You know it's true
Everything I do - I do it for you

He took a chance and pulled her in a little closer so that their bodies
touched.  To his surprise, she didn't resist.  He felt her pulse quicken at
the nearness but could sense her inner turmoil.  He would let her make
the next move when she was ready.  Buffy was so confused.  Her mind was
telling her not to trust him.  But her heart was telling her to let things
take their course, that he cared for her and wasn't going to hurt her.

Look into my heart - you will find
There's nothin' there to hide
Take me as I am - take my life
I would give it all - I would sacrifice

Buffy's heart won the inner battle and she snuggled in closer and laid her
head on his shoulder.  She closed her eyes and thought of their dance a few
weeks earlier.  He had been so tender with her, so loving as he held her
while they danced.  And when he'd walked her home, he'd been the perfect
gentleman.  She had been the one to initiate the kiss goodnight on her
porch.

Don't tell me it's not worth fightin' for
I can't help it - there's nothin' I want more
Ya know it's true
Everything I do - I do it for you

Buffy raised her head and brushed her lips across Spike's.  Then snuggled
her head back into his neck and kissed his adam's apple.  A small groan
escaped Spike as he felt her lips on his skin.  Her touch was so warm and
her lips were like fire.  He longed to sweep her into his arms and carry her
off into the night.

There's no love - like your love
And no other - could give more love
There's nowhere - unless you're there
All the time - all the way

Spike tightened his embrace and captured her lips in a hungry kiss.  Their
lips parted and their tongues started dueling.  This is what he wanted, this
is what he'd been waiting for weeks to do.  He didn't bloody care that it
made no sense that he wanted the Slayer.  Even less sense that he felt he
was in love with her.

Oh - you can't tell me it's not worth tryin' for
I can't help it - there's nothin' I want more
I would fight for you - I'd lie for you
Walk the wire for you - I'd die for you

He pulled back from the embrace and looked deeply into her eyes.  What he
saw there made his heart skip a beat.  There in the depths of her eyes, he
could see acceptance.  She had accepted him and was facing her feelings
about him.  He knew that there would still be many issues to work out, but
now he knew that deep down inside, she was willing to try.  He had hope.

Ya know it's true
Everything I do - I do it for you

As the song ended, she reached up and dragged his head down to hers for a
quick kiss then said "Walk me home?"

"I'd love to, Pet." he replied talking her hand as they left the Bronze.

==========

The End.  (Masquerade Series - part 4)






















































-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Angel75427@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Surprises" Problems
Date: 03 Oct 1998 11:51:01 EDT

Yesterday, my little sister and I got in a fight, and she erased all of my
story "Surprises", including parts I haven't already sent out. It would be a
big hassle to rewrite all of the parts, so I have decided to discontinue the
story. I'm really sorry.

-Jaclyn



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: KylenRevik@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Inquiry Regarding Buffy Zines
Date: 04 Oct 1998 13:47:05 EDT

Are there any Buffy zines out there that are currently accepting submissions
of fics (previously posted or not, I have some of both) in exchange for
tribbers copies?

Please let me know,
Rachel



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: KylenRevik@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Inquiry Regarding Buffy Zines
Date: 04 Oct 1998 13:47:04 EDT

Are there any Buffy zines out there that are currently accepting submissions
of fics (previously posted or not, I have some of both) in exchange for
tribbers copies?

Please let me know,
Rachel



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "J. Jericho Born" <traction@sirius.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Flies to Honey" (04/?) sequel to "The Necromancer"
Date: 04 Oct 1998 23:21:48 -0700

TITLE: "Flies to Honey" (Part 04/?)
AUTHOR: J. Jericho Born
E-MAIL: traction@sirius.com
FEEDBACK: Please let me know what you think of my fanfic with some feedback.
DISTRIBUTION: The author reserves rights on this story. Please do not
distribute without expressed permission.
RATING: PG-13  Contains violence.
SPOILERS: Spoilers to previous fanfic.
DESCRIPTION: The sequel to "The Necromancer". Abel is now unconcious, but
attracting vampires like flies to honey. Buffy is caught between protecting
her enemy and helping her friend Willow find her beloved Oz. Meanwhile, Willow
gets deeper into magic and the occult in order to find a way to restore Oz to
human form.
DISCLAIMER: The writer of this unauthorized fan fiction is not affiliated with
any of the parties involved in the making of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The
characters are the property of Joss Whedon and whomever else the lawyers may
deem fit, they are used without permission. Technically that is not legal, but
I'm not anticipating any law suits. This work, the plot line, and the
characters introduced that are not already featured on Buffy the Vampire
Slayer are the work of Joshua Jericho Born, Copyright 1998.

==============

Scene 3

Avoiding other students as she went, Buffy turned a hall of Sunnydale High to
come upon the school's computer lab. She had not seen her friend Willow at all
that day and was starting to get concerned. Her worries were quieted somewhat
when she saw the redhead in question diligently hacking away at a keyboard.
Buffy approached.

"Hi, I've been looking for you," she said pleasantly.

"Hi," blandly replied Willow without even averting her eyes from the computer
screen.

"What 'ya working on?" casually inquired Buffy.

An awkward amount of time passed before Willow spent energy to give a reply.

"I've been going over some of Miss Calender's documents and some necromancer
books to come up with a way of changing Oz back to human," she replied.

"If we ever find him that is," Willow added pessimistically.

"Willow!" Buffy said in shock.

"I told you we'd find him," reaffirmed Buffy.

"Yeah, well, you like to say that, but you're not doing much about it,"
commented Willow.

Buffy was shocked even more. Willow finally looked at Buffy, irritation and
contempt showing.

"It's just that you haven't done a thing to try and find Oz. All you do with
your slaying time lately is guard. . . him," Willow boldly said.

Amazed to say the least, Buffy had no idea that this kind of angst had been
brewing with her best friend. She hung her head and thought for a second or
two.

"I know this must be hard for you. I guess I didn't really look at things from
your point of view. I'm the Slayer, I've learned to accept it," explained
Buffy maturely. Willow looked away and listened to Buffy with hear ears, but
not her heart.

Buffy continued, "Part of the job description is having to slay vampires when
you'd rather be out or shopping, or having a life, or even rescuing your
friends. Right now every vampire and his mother seem to be flocking to Abel's
body, so that's where I have to be." 

Clicking away with the mouse, Willow saved her work to a floppy disk. She put
it in her backpack and got up to leave.

"It's nice to see you're so grown up and mature and have all you're priorities
straight. Don't bother trying to call me tonight, I'm going to be going
through. . . his library to find something that can help Oz," said Willow
while leaving.

"Hey," called out Buffy after her, "If you want I can go with you."

Turning, Willow stopped mid stride. She answered sarcastically, "I'll be fine
alone. Abel could use some company anyway."

Now alone in the commotion of the computer lab, Buffy's jaw dropped
astoundingly. It felt strange to be on bad terms with Willow. Slowly and
bitterly, the reality of the conversation that just occurred seeped in. Willow
finally said Abel's name at least.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: sah <romana@mindspring.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: ADMIN:  List rules
Date: 06 Oct 1998 14:26:30

Welcome!  This list is for fiction related to "Buffy The Vampire 
Slayer," both the TV series and the movie.  To ensure that we all get 
to enjoy as much fiction as possible, please adhere to the following 
guidelines, and please save them for future reference.

1. Fiction should have Buffy characters in it and clearly be related 
to Buffy.  Crossovers are great, and expected, but general 
vampire/monster stories that aren't in the Buffy universe and don't 
use Buffy characters belong somewhere else.

2. Discussion of posted fiction is permitted onlist.  Please put 
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Discussion that is not related directly to the fiction should go over 
to the general Buffy list.  Discussion of fiction is expected to 
follow common netiquette guidelines and use PG-13 language.

3. No advertising of <any> items or services, Buffy related or not, 
and no posting of non-story items such as .gifs, sound files, etc..  
No attached files of <any> kind-- if your mailer makes your fiction 
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     **Mark the post as a "spoiler" in the subject header.  
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This ensures that anyone who doesn't like knowing about an episode 
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Spoiler warnings are not necessary after the start of the episode's 
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If you have a question about something's suitability for posting, feel 
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6.  By subscribing and/or posting to this list, you acknowledge that 
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Again, welcome!  If  you have any questions about these rules, please 
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 & 
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Listowners, Buffy the Vampire Slayer Fiction List
buffyfic@xmission.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "J. Jericho Born" <traction@sirius.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Flies to Honey" (05/?) sequel to "The Necromancer"
Date: 06 Oct 1998 23:06:45 -0700

TITLE: "Flies to Honey" (Part 05/?)
AUTHOR: J. Jericho Born
E-MAIL: traction@sirius.com
FEEDBACK: Please let me know what you think of my fanfic with some feedback.
DISTRIBUTION: The author reserves rights on this story. Please do not
distribute without expressed permission.
RATING: PG-13  Contains violence.
SPOILERS: Spoilers to previous fanfic.
DESCRIPTION: The sequel to "The Necromancer". Abel is now unconcious, but
attracting vampires like flies to honey. Buffy is caught between protecting
her enemy and helping her friend Willow find her beloved Oz. Meanwhile, Willow
gets deeper into magic and the occult in order to find a way to restore Oz to
human form.
DISCLAIMER: The writer of this unauthorized fan fiction is not affiliated with
any of the parties involved in the making of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The
characters are the property of Joss Whedon and whomever else the lawyers may
deem fit, they are used without permission. Technically that is not legal, but
I'm not anticipating any law suits. This work, the plot line, and the
characters introduced that are not already featured on Buffy the Vampire
Slayer are the work of Joshua Jericho Born, Copyright 1998.

==============

Scene 4

None of Willow's exploits into the dark arts had been as black as her current
interest. Necromancy, the study of death itself, was a lost and forbidden
calling even among those who outcasted themselves from society by practicing
witchcraft. In order to find out how to undo what Abel did to her lost love,
however, she must first find out exactly what was done. Therefore into the
darkness she went.

Determined, Willow tred into the underground lair, reassuring herself that her
endeavor would not go unrewarded. The air was heavy with the stench of
decaying corpses, obtrusively foul and nauseating. The bodies that lay there
were once reborn as zombies, ready to toil tirelessly, but when their master
fell their puppet life was lost and they returned to their worm feeding and
maggot breeding state.

Stepping over the odd corpse, Willow made her way to an all too familiar room.
She looked over where she remembered being strapped down to a table, about to
be subject to God knows what before Buffy saved her. The spot where their
enemy had his last concious thought looked conspiciously plain, devoid of
signifigance. She walked over to an open book. Presumably these were the
directions that Abel followed in order to be able to feel. Written in an
archaic, cryptic language, Willow had no use for it.

The potions and such in the far corner of the room caught Willow's attention.
She remembered Abel mixing something together, arrogantly as he was, and it
being needed to turn Oz into a werewolf. Hopeful, Willow herded a couple
marked bottles into her backpack. Perhaps she could use these to change Oz
back.

This room exhausted it's helpful potential and Willow made her way out. She
continued down the halls, remembering her way so she could backtrack, until
she came upon a room that caught her eye. The desk in the center of the room
was covered by a sea of books and documents while an equally impressive cache
of materials lay neatly tucked away on a bookshelf. Willow entered, shifting
her eyes side to side.

To her delight, Willow realized that although the manuscripts were in an
unknown language most of Abel's notes were in English. The scribblings ranged
from humorous to disturbing.

"Typical Maldini, always trying to do things the hard way. He'd write a fifty
page step by step description of the technique one can use to locate one's own
ass. Much like one's own ass, Kragen Demons are easier to feel for than to
search for like he prescribes," one note read. 

Another note made Willow feel uneasy. Abel had written, "A werewolf! How
exciting! It will be good for me to handle one in my research. Also, the girl
with the amber hewn hair that's with him will suffice for my less studious
interests. I can grab them both while their together and kill two birds with
one stone."

Frustrated, Willow was not making any progress. She was leaving when she
noticed a few roughly written lines on a small scrap of paper.

It read, "From all I can discern, the same procedure outlined in Bhadoven's
Anamoulous Beastiary for 'curing' a werewolf can be used to make a periodic
werewolf more permanent. A few commom reagents mixed in equal portions, spread
on the subject, and ignited with a focused blast of hellfire should do the
trick. I'm rather dissatisfied, it's like playing with a child's toys."

Rejoice, that was it. Willow enthusiastically shoved the scrap paper into her
pocket. Then a thought hit her, who was she going to get to summon a blast of
hellfire? She slumped her shoulders back down, disappointed to say the least.
After a few moments thought, she perked back up. It was resolved then, she'd
just have to learn the whole hellfire thing herself.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: taygeta@juno.com (C. Catherine)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Chronicles (28/?)
Date: 08 Oct 1998 00:42:05 -0700

TITLE: Chronicles of the White Knight #28 Voices
AUTHOR: Taygeta
E-MAIL: taygeta@juno.com
FEEDBACK:  Very muchly wanted (bad or good...whatever the complaint)
DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just tell me first.
RATING: PG
KEYWORDS: Buffy/Xander fanfic
DISCLAIMER:  The characters portrayed in this fanfic and any such
reference to Buffy the Vampire Slayer television series belong to their
creator, Joss Whedon, and their owners, Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui
Productions, Sanddollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox. In other
words, they do not belong to me.  Copyright infringement not intended.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Chronicles of the White Knight
#28 Voices
By: Taygeta

Blip…Blip…Blip…the sound of the heart monitor echoed, breaking the
would-be silence of the room.  Xander lay in the hospital bed, bruised
and bandaged, but alive.  Yet, the sight of his unanimated features due
to heavy sedation tugged at Buffy's heart as she sat looking at him in a
chair a few feet away.  With a sigh, she stood up and carefully sat on
the edge of the hospital bed, entwining the fingers of her left hand in
his right and began in a whisper, "Xander…if I could only…"

"Buffy…you okay?"  Willow inquired as she walked in the room carefully.

The slayer, surprised, quickly removed her hand from his, although not
quick enough, and said, "Yeah, I'm okay, but that's more than I can say
for Xander."

Willow smiled softly as she walked towards his still form and tentatively
kissed his forehead, "He'll be okay…he's Xander, nothing wounds him too
long.  He'll pull through, eventually."

"But when's the eventual, Will?" she asked, "Today…tomorrow…the doctor
says he's going to make it, but how?  How?!  He can barely walk…that son
of a - I can't believe Angel - " Buffy stammered in frustration, "God…why
is it that when things seem bad enough as it is, everything just becomes
even worse?"  

"Buffy…Buffy…" hushed Willow as she took her friend into her arms, "Calm
down…he's going to be okay…he's going to be okay!"

"How can you be so sure?" she responded pulling away from her friend's
grasp, "How do you know?"

The redhead sighed as she fiddled with the buttons of her brown sweater
before meeting her friend's passionate expression, "I don't know, but I
can't imagine it any other way.  He's going to make it and walk or no
walk, we're his friends and we're going to help him no matter the cost."

"But, I'm not his friend…I - I'm just his ex-girlfriend that he can't
even bare to look at," she replied as she grabbed her bag and reached for
the door knob.

"That's not true!  Buffy, Xander loves you …you know that!"  Willow
insisted as she grabbed the wrist the held the knob, "he told you so."

"He was obviously delusional.  He used to…that I know for sure, but he
hates me now…hates me for what I did to him!  I hurt him and I never
wanted to do that to him…ever.  You can't take away pain, Will…you can
forgive it and you can say you forget it, but it's there and it never
goes away." 

Having heard that, Willow backed away and asked as she folded her arms to
her chest, "Where are you going?"

Buffy looked at her friend as she opened the door, "The sun's coming down
soon and I've let it come down too many times.  I'm going to end it now,
that's where I'm going, The End.  And I'm going to make damn sure that
it's not mine, but if…"  She glanced at Xander for a second, and
continued, "But if something does happen, tell him I love him…tell him
something that tells him I care."

"You're not ready!" she tried to insist holding back the door.

"No, I've been ready," Buffy said shaking her head and meeting her eyes,
"I've just been stalling and looked what happened because of that.  Angel
dies tonight."

The door closed behind her and Willow stood looking at its gray paint for
awhile, unsure of what to say or where to go, but finally, she whispered,
"Good luck."  

Turning to Xander, she pulled the chair against the wall closer to the
bed, and clasped his right hand.  It was virtually bandaged free, saved
for the finger splint that was miniscule in comparison to his bandaged
head, swollen eyes and cheeks, broken left arm, and the cast encumbering
his barely mobile right leg. 

"It's strange seeing you like this…I mean, you always broke bones when we
were kids, but never this bad.  The worst it ever came before was when
Frankie Hertz beat you up when we were 7 and you had to get cast on your
arm and a finger splint for your pinkie.  And I thought you looked
terrible then…no offense or anything.  Xander…things use to be so much
easier back then…we didn't have to worry about a vampire reeking his
revenge on humanity, heck…we didn't even have to worry about the standing
question of the opposite sex.  

"Where have the days gone and why - of all people - did they lead you to
this?  Is it destiny?  Fate?  The course of the stars?"  She glanced at
his right hand that she held and recalled how he had told her once that
he was contemplating on becoming a writer and although the idea seemed
abstract at the time, it didn't seem that strange now.  "Maybe it is
destiny…maybe you'll one day write a book about all of this.  Obviously,
you're gonna have to change the locale and the names of the characters or
Cordelia's probably gonna start thinking that she's the main character -
maybe that's why nothing happened to this hand or maybe…maybe it's sheer
luck?  Whatever it is, I'll be there for you…I'll always be there for you
like you've been there for me and she'll be there too.  You know who I
mean…no matter what she does or says, or more really, everything she does
or says, tells me that she still loves you.  I just hope that you haven't
the slightest doubt about that."

"Um…Willow?"  Giles interrupted as he prudently entreated on their
privacy, "H -how is he?"

"Hey, Giles," she responded softly, "h - he's doing okay, I mean, he's
still under some pretty good dosage of medicine cause of…y'know the pain
and recovery and stuff, but other than that, he's okay and before you
know it, he's probably going to make another joke about tweed."

The Watcher chuckled softly, "Well, we can't do without that, now, can
we?"

"I'm gonna go and call my parents…they've been pretty worried about
Xander ever since Buffy called me to come here.  They're probably going
to want to know what's going on - or well…what I can tell them happened,"
Willow said as she walked towards the door and she paused, "You do know
where Buffy went to do, don't you?"

He swallowed apprehensively and nodded, "Yes…I know what Buffy is going
to *attempt* to accomplish."

"Then you don't think she's going to - "

"What I think, Willow, is that Buffy will do what she has to do, when she
has to do it, and whether it occurs now or later is up to Angelus.  She
will find him when he wants to be found."

"Oh," she replied and turned the knob. 

"Why not use the phone in here?" he inquired as he wiped his glasses with
a handkerchief from his pocket.

She glanced at the phone and then at him with a smile, "It's okay…I can
use the one outside."

Rupert Giles sighed as he took in the still figure of one of his
"Slayerettes," and sat in the chair last occupied by Willow.  The room
was a dreary as any hospital room could be and last he recalled occupying
such a building was when Buffy had fallen ill…and prayed to God that such
past incidences would not occur this latest duration spent here.  Still,
God only knew what havoc and destruction lay elsewhere, particularly
pertaining to a certain slayer and her vampirical adversary.

"Well, Xander…it seems that wishes don't really come true as one would
like and life's 'wicked hexes' are not soon to fade, but rather soon to
grow and engulf the cursed, but I suppose we can't say we didn't - we
didn't try.  Although, I never thought all of our trying would amount to
this and as annoyed as I seem to be at you at times, Xander, I wish this
on no one, especially not on yourself.  I probably wouldn't tell you this
if you were conscious, but you're growing up…for the better - despite the
abnormalities we're faced against - you all are.  And I hope that - that
within this spectrum of time, I've at least taught you something
meaningful."

"Don't worry, Giles…you've taught us a lot," Cordelia said from behind
him, "More than we'll ever let you know, but you've taught us a lot."

"That's very kind of you to say, thank you," he said standing up, "Now,
if you'd excuse me, Cordelia, I'm going to get some tea."

"The sorry -excuse for a cafeteria doesn't have tea, but you could take
their mock off of French Vanilla…it's great compared to their wannabe
HazelNut stuff," she quipped.  "You'd think with all the dead that come
through here, they'd have enough money for some of the good stuff. 
Y'know Taster's Choice."

"Um…t - thank you," he muttered as he closed the door behind him
wondering if  he should have taught them the wonders of a good cup of
tea, or at least, the brand names of good coffee.  He continued under his
breath as he walked to the cafeteria, "Taster's Choice, indeed…"

The stylish brunette eyed her former boyfriend carefully as she stood
beside the bed and responded bluntly, "What can I tell you, Xander?  You
look terrible, and I …"  She paused and exhaled, "I want you to get
better - you have to get better - 'cause…well …I miss you.  I know we did
the whole 'we're friends again' thing, but I want to hang with you,
insult you… like old times, except without all the uh…y'know trips to the
closet.  Although I'm sure Buffy's gonna stake out the vicinity to make
sure there isn't a closet within a hundred-foot radius." 

She laughed nervously at her own joke, "Seriously, though, about Buffy, I
meant what I said before about how I saw a certain permanence to you
guys.  I really did see that, and I really hate to admit it, but I was
always jealous because I knew that from the start.  Not really, but
sub-consciously.  No matter what I did and no matter what was going, she
was your number one priority.  I could only be so lucky to find a guy
that thought of me before anyone else and I'm glad she found you Xander,
'cause you're a great guy…when you're not making with the tried funny."

"Uh…Cordelia?"  Oz said carefully as he walked into the room, "You're
purse is ringing."

Her eyes widened, "Oh…oh…it's probably my parent's wondering where I am
so late…um, thanks."

"You're…" he began, but she flew out the door before he could finish
lamely, "…welcome, yeah."

He was about to follow her exit, but he turned to look at Xander.  He let
go of the doorknob and walked towards the hospital bed, sitting down on
the chair that had been moved by Willow.  

"Look, I know you have this quasi-antagonism concept with me, and
perfectly understandable seeing as that Willow has been your bestest bud
since forever, and obviously you kind of see me as the guy that's taking
up a lot of her time.  I know you don't think too much of me, and I
pretty much don't know you enough to think much of you, but I do know
that Will cares about you.  I don't like seeing that expression that's
been permanent on her face for this entire time.  When she saw you coming
out of surgery, I couldn't take that look away from her eyes, but you
can.  All you gotta do is come out of this all right.  I'm not asking for
me, Xander, far from, but I am asking for her, for your best friend."

Oz paused and was about to walk out, but he turned to glance at him, "Not
that you can hear me any better now or anything, but…uh…Buffy needs you
too and I know you need her.  Couldn't do without the other, you know? 
Like I said, the last time we actually had a decent conversation, I know
the feeling."  He shook his head and chuckled softly, feeling strange
talking to a sedated Xander, but he had to admit, as he walked out of the
room, at least it enabled him to get a word in edgewise.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Buffy walked into the white hospital building and she couldn't believe
that after all those hours she was coming back to where she had left.  It
was late and visiting hours had come and gone, but as she came to
Xander's hospital room door she thought, <hey, that's never stopped me
before, so why should it stop me now?>

Gently opening and closing the door, she looked around the room and found
a single bright lamp glowing beside the bed, providing the only light for
the curtain-drawn room.  Placing her Slayer Utility Bag down on the
floor, she sat at the edge of the bed once more and entwined her fingers
in that of his right.

"Xander," she began as she pushed a wisp of her blonde hair out of her
eyes with her free hand.  "Last night, was the first time, in a long
time, that I was truly afraid.  I wasn't afraid of him and I wasn't
afraid of the future that he represented for me.  What I was afraid of,
what plagued me the entire time I knew you were on that operating table,
was that whatever my future was going to be, you weren't going to be in
it.  I need you, Xander, I need you to be apart of my life again.  I - I
love you."

Bring!  Bring!

The phone beside the bed shrilled and Buffy instantaneously grabbed it
before it could ring any further.  It was nearly 3 and she wondered who
could possibly be calling at this ungodly hour.

"Hello?"

"It's time…"
 

___________________________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Aglx@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Story Editor
Date: 08 Oct 1998 09:57:28 EDT

I am in desperate need of a good story editor just for the rest of my "Love
Revival" series. I can't get in contact with my current editor, and judging
from the feedback I'm getting to hurry up and send the final version, I need
to get it out soon. 

If anyone would be willing to help me out, there are only 5 more parts to
edit. All I need is someone to go over it, check my grammar and spelling and
phrasing and then send me back the story with all the corrections made. That's
all. I'd appreciate any help I could get since I really want to get this story
out, but my whole reasoning for having an editor is the fact that I'm not to
great at catching my own mistakes. ( : 

Thanks in advance.

-Michelle



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: blue_moose@juno.com (Jaina Solo)
Subject: BUFFYFIC:Harsh Little Girl 1/1
Date: 08 Oct 1998 20:42:39 -0400

Title:Harsh Little Girl
Part of my "At the Choirgirl Hotel" universe, companion piece to "Exit
75", at this time unposted.
Author:Jaina
Feedback:Absolutely!  I adore feedback and will respond to all of it. 
Constructive criticism is great too, but flames will be immediately and
cheerfully posted to my webpage so the whole internet can learn all about
trolls.  Any comments you have should be sent to blue_moose@juno.com
Distribution:If you'd like to archive this, please ask me first so I know
where it's going.
Rating:PG
Disclaimer:Once upon a time in LA, there was a very creative man named
Joss Whedon who came up with the idea of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and all
related...stuff.  Today he's pretty rich.  He owns them; I don't. 
Capice?
Author's Notes:This is a post Becoming Part 2 piece.  I started this
before Anne and finished it after, so disregard everything you saw in
that episode while reading.  :-)  It's kind of a dark piece written from
Joyce Summer's point of view.  Its companion piece, "Exit 75," is being
written and should be posted soon.   Both stories in the Choirgirl
universe have titles taken from lyrics from songs by Tori Amos on her
newest CD, "From the Choirgirl Hotel."  This one is from her most
excellent song, Playboy Mommy.
----------------------
Harsh Little Girl
----------------------
	In my platform shoes, I trip over to the bar.  My feet are slowly
going numb, pinched by the tight leather, but hey, my feet look great. 
Maybe the rest of me does, too-I'm picking up some looks from other
patrons.  Not bad for a full-time mother of one turned gallery manager. 
Maybe it's the makeup I found in my daughter's room during my frantic
search through her things.  Maybe it's the shoes I borrowed from her
closet.  Hell, it might just be because these things are damned hard to
walk in and I look slightly inebriated.  I must be a puzzle for them. 
Drunks usually stumble *out* of bars, not into them.  It's gonna be a
grand old show when I leave in several hours' time.
	I sit down at the bar and order a screwdriver.  The bartender
gives me a worried look, but makes the drink.  I guess he's worried he'll
have to escort a respectable woman-a respectably drunk woman-home at the
end of the night.  I ignore him.  I feel drunk already.  I've felt drunk
since she left.  She.  I amaze myself sometimes; I can't even bring
myself to say her name.  Product of my loins, Mom's best friend...total
stranger.  You know, before I found the gallery, I thought about buying a
larger house and taking on boarders.  I changed my mind when I thought
about all the dangers involved.  Any type of dangerous person could be in
our house.  And my daughter, she was so trusting.  I couldn't take that
kind of risk, no matter how paranoid it seemed.
	Well, paranoia it wasn't.  There *was* a dangerous person living
with me.  But the danger wasn't to my child-it *was* my child.  She had a
whole life, a whole world I never suspected even existed.  When I got her
note I was terrified.  It was the final proof of all I didn't know about
her.  My wonderful little girl would never have run away.  The young
woman my daughter has become did.  And I have no idea how or where to
look for her, because I just don't know her.  I don't carry any insights
into her mind that will tell me where she's gone.  I didn't do the
responsible thing by calling her father and the police, not necessarily
in that order.  Neither would be able to offer any help, anyway.  I did
the panicky thing, the crazy thing.  I tore through her room, her
possessions.  I was searching for...I don't know.  Searching for *her*,
in a way.  I was looking for some clue, no matter how small, that would
lead me to the knowledge of who my daughter really was.  I didn't find
much, yet I found everything.  Wooden stakes and vials of holy water;
tools of the stranger in my house.  I was way past the point of being
fazed by them.    And then I succeeded in my quest-I found my daughter's
diary.  Her words.  I read it and I'm not ashamed of it.  She'd hate it,
but if we're such strangers, why should it matter what she thinks? 
Written in her hand, I found the truth.  And the truth is, she just
didn't trust me.  She's never trusted me.  Damn her!
	I snatch my drink from the bartender's hand and take gulp.  The
alcohol burns its way down my throat.  Good, now it matches the inferno
of my heart, my mind.  I'm filled with a sudden bitterness.  If she was
to walk in here right now, tearful and apologetic, I really don't know if
I could find it in me to forgive her.  I'm not saying I wouldn't, or
couldn't; I just don't know.  For over a decade now she's been my world. 
I've done my best, tried to be a good parent, especially when her father
and I split and my workload doubled.  Have I been a perfect mother?  No. 
Of course not.  As far as I know, only Mary was, and I'm no sinless
virgin.  But I *did* do my best, and what do I get in return?  Hidden
secrets.  Lies.  She never even tried telling me the truth.  That's what
tears me up inside.  I can't say I would have accepted it without qualms,
but I would have *tried* to understand.  I'd have endeavored to find some
meaning to it all and lived with what I found.   But she robbed me of
that.  She hid the truth until it was too late for calm talks and
eventual acceptance.  She threw it all on me and then had the guts to
resent my anger.  My world was imploding and she was playing the
self-righteous martyr, as if she'd surveyed the available paths and
chosen this course as the best to travel upon.  If some not-so-divine
intervention hadn't prompted me to witness the actions of her true self,
I'd still never know.  How dare she.  How dare she.
	I notice that my drink is empty and I'm suddenly tired and I
wonder-where is she now?  Is my child alive and well, or has she become
the victim of one of the illusory monsters I always feared?  I feel a
pang in my heart.  What am I doing here?  Spilling out my sorrows to the
bottom of a cheap shot glass?    Maybe I'm trying to run away from the
fact that I'm scared to death.  Stranger or not, she's always been my
world...and if I'm being honest to myself, she still is.  Every moment
I'm here is another moment she's gone.  It occurs to me-is this what it's
like for her?  Unknowing to what nightmare may come, knowing that the sky
is falling, the sky is falling....and never being able to tell a soul.
	I don't know.  Maybe I'll never know.  All I know is that I'm
sitting alone in a noisy bar while my child is somewhere far away...and I
am as blind as I have ever been.

___________________________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Aglx@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (22/25)
Date: 09 Oct 1998 09:53:15 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (22/25)
Author: AnGeL X (Aglx@aol.com)
Distrbution: Just Ask & Keep my name attached!
Spoilers: Takes place after Becoming
Rating: PG/PG-13 Violence.
Description: Buffy/Angel Love Story.
Disclaimer: Plot Mine. Characters all but Savarah are mine!
I own nothing that's really Buffy, never will, don't sue. 
Feedback: I live for it. I also refuse to write without it!

Thanks so much to all those who offered to help me with my stories. I 
had no idea there were even that many people on the list! (: 

      Sunnydale was unusually quiet for a late night. The tension
between Buffy and Angel only made it worse.  They walked side
by side down the sidewalk of a Sunnydale neighborhood. Few
lights were left on in the nearby houses and the effect it
created gave even Buffy the creeps.         
      Repeated glances up to Angel's face was all she could do
to keep from exploding. < I killed her. He made her and I killed
her. >
      "Angel?" Buffy whispered.
      Without a word, he stopped and looked at her.
      "Are, are you okay?" She stuttered.  The pain she knew he
had to be going through was tearing her up inside. And she hated
Drusilla. She knew she had to die, but she never thought it'd
cause Angel any pain.
      "Fine. I should have done that a long time ago. It would
have been better for all of us."
      "Oh, don't talk like that lover. Drusilla was your
greatest creation. Don't be ashamed of such exotic work."  Savarah
leaned up against a tree trunk and smiled down on them.
      Buffy could see Angel's face flood with anger as the
devil's figure came into his focus behind her.  She spun around
quickly and stood blocking Angel from his greatest enemy.
      "Oh that's good Buffy. You stand in front of him and
protect him. I'm sure that will work."
      Angel pushed Buffy out of the way and stepped casually
towards Savarah. "We all know what needs to be done. So let's get
it done!"
      "Ooh I love how ambitious you are!" Savarah squealed in a
high pitched tone. "But, I'm not here to fight you. That time will
come. But it's not tonight."
      "That's all you're about isn't it? Just games."
      "How am I supposed to have any fun if I don't play games?"
      "So why'd you come?"
      "Dear Buffy, do you really think I would miss Drusilla's
death?"
      "You came, you saw, now get the hell out of here!" Angel
hissed.
      "Okay, okay. I'll see you soon Buffy. Really soon."
      "I'll be waiting."
      Savarah turned away into brisk Sunnydale night.

* * * * *

      "Dead?"
      "Yes Giles. For the three thousandth time. She's dead."
      "I'm sorry. Its just I wasn't prepared for you to take on
her death."
      "Huh?"
      "Spike. I can only imagine what he has in store for you and
Angel now that you killed Drusilla."
      "I can handle Spike."
      "We don't have time for this!" Angel said. He was perched
up on the counter in the library with his head buried in his hands.
     "We need to find out how to stop Savarah!"
      "Yes. But I'm afraid I don't have any good news. There is
only one way to kill her. Angel would have to do it. The problem is,
there's no guarantee she won't try another trick like the last
time."
      "So this is your basic loose-loose situation, huh?" Xander
said interrupting his normally quiet existence in the room.
      "Unless she doesn't try anything and just fights you, I'm
afraid Xander's right. There will never be an end to it."
      "Well, that's a risk we're just going to have to take!"
Buffy rose from her chair and moved towards Angel who continued to
hide his face from everyone. "Angel?" He didn't respond. His body
just sat there, unmoving. "Angel, are you going to help me?"
      "Of course I'll help you. But Buffy, I don't want to live
like this. I don't want you to have to live like this. Always
waiting for her next attack? What if she kills me?"
      "She won't."
 Angel hopped off the counter and wrapped his arms around
Buffy's waist. "I don't want to lose you again."
      "You won't. I won't let her hurt you. We'll figure a way
out of this. We have to."
      "Uh, guys?" Cordelia said from the stairs. "What about
Spike?"
      "We'll take care of him."
      "I got it!" Willow shouted from her trance-like state in
front of the computer screen.
      "Got what?" Everyone rushed over by her and awaited to
news of her findings.
      "The answer to our problem.  I found a spell that will
keep Savarah from cursing you again."
      "This is why I love you Willow. You always save us when we
need you," Xander said wrapping his arms around her. Cordelia and
Oz both gave him warning glares. "What? She's my friend. I'm allowed
to hug my friend, aren't I?"
      "Don't thank me yet. We still have to perform the ritual
before Savarah comes after you." Willow clicked the mouse a few
more times and then paper came spewing out of the printer next to
her.
      "Xander, Cordelia. I need you two to go get these items.
We'll need them for the ritual." They nodded and took the piece
of paper on their way rushing out the doors. "Oz, you stay here
with me and help me set up."
      "Sure. Anything you need."
      "Giles, I think it might be a good idea if you and Buffy
do some training while we prepare. It'll take a few hours. Buffy's
going to need all the practice she can get."
      "Yes ma'am Watcher Willow!" Buffy said with sarcastic grin
on her face.  Buffy looked up at Angel with those pathetic puppy
dog eyes.
      "Wanna help me train?"
      "Oh no you don't.  Don't look at me with those cute puppy
dog eyes!"  After a few seconds of her continued glare, he caved.
     "Okay, okay. But watch the low blows. I've gotta fight her too."
      "I'll be gentle."
      "Enough!" Giles shouted. "We have a lot of work to do."

~~~~
That's all for now.  Today's my b-day and I'm going to party!

-Michelle



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "J. Jericho Born" <traction@sirius.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Idea from "Dead Man's Party"
Date: 09 Oct 1998 11:12:42 -0700

I had an idea for writing a fanfic inspired by Buffy's offhand comment in
"Dead Man's Party" where she said, "How about home schooling? It's not just
for scary religious people anymore." Since I myself have been home schooled
for more than five years now I thought I'd write a kind of "spin-off" of BtVS
where Buffy becomes home schooled and introduces a new gang of slayerettes
based on archetypes of home schoolers I've observed. I thought it could be
kind of funny and quirky, any comments?

-JB



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: KylenRevik@aol.com
Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Idea from "Dead Man's Party"
Date: 09 Oct 1998 15:27:44 EDT

FIRSt-- please excuse the Caps-- my keybOard is *SEriously* wigging out on mE.
::sigh::

In a message dated 98-10-09 14:21:12 EDT, traction@sirius.com writes:

>I had an idea for writing a fanfic inspired by Buffy's offhand comment in
>"Dead Man's Party" where she said, "How about home schooling? It's not just
>for scary religious people anymore." Since I myself have been home schooled
>for more than five years now I thought I'd write a kind of "spin-off" of BtVS
>where Buffy becomes home schooled and introduces a new gang of slayerettes
>based on archetypes of home schoolers I've observed. I thought it could be
>kind of funny and quirky, any comments?

Something I noticed (anD dIdn't Much liKE) about DMP and "Anne" was that the
group wasn't together. I think that really ContRibutes a Lot to  the chemISTry
OF tHE show, and without it it seems a bit empty. SO if you're going to pursue
this, I would recomment being VERY careful about it. MaKe sure you're staying
true to the spirit of "Buffy", and keep the characters true. :)

Rachel



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: KylenRevik@aol.com
Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Idea from "Dead Man's Party"
Date: 09 Oct 1998 15:26:49 EDT

FIRSt-- please excuse the Caps-- my keybOard is *SEriously* wigging out on mE.
::sigh::

In a message dated 98-10-09 14:21:12 EDT, traction@sirius.com writes:

>I had an idea for writing a fanfic inspired by Buffy's offhand comment in
>"Dead Man's Party" where she said, "How about home schooling? It's not just
>for scary religious people anymore." Since I myself have been home schooled
>for more than five years now I thought I'd write a kind of "spin-off" of BtVS
>where Buffy becomes home schooled and introduces a new gang of slayerettes
>based on archetypes of home schoolers I've observed. I thought it could be
>kind of funny and quirky, any comments?

Something I noticed (anD dIdn't Much liKE) about DMP and "Anne" was that the
group wasn't together. I think that really ContRibutes a Lot to  the chemISTry
OF tHE show, and without it it seems a bit empty. SO if you're going to pursue
this, I would recomment being VERY careful about it. MaKe sure you're staying
true to the spirit of "Buffy", and keep the characters true. :)

Rachel



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "J. Jericho Born" <traction@sirius.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Flies to Honey" (6/?) sequel to "The Necromancer"
Date: 09 Oct 1998 22:52:30 -0700

TITLE: "Flies to Honey" (Part 06/?)
AUTHOR: J. Jericho Born
E-MAIL: traction@sirius.com
FEEDBACK: Please let me know what you think of my fanfic with some feedback.
DISTRIBUTION: The author reserves rights on this story. Please do not
distribute without expressed permission.
RATING: PG-13  Contains violence.
SPOILERS: Spoilers to previous fanfic.
DESCRIPTION: The sequel to "The Necromancer". Abel is now unconcious, but
attracting vampires like flies to honey. Buffy is caught between protecting
her enemy and helping her friend Willow find her beloved Oz. Meanwhile, Willow
gets deeper into magic and the occult in order to find a way to restore Oz to
human form.
DISCLAIMER: The writer of this unauthorized fan fiction is not affiliated with
any of the parties involved in the making of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The
characters are the property of Joss Whedon and whomever else the lawyers may
deem fit, they are used without permission. Technically that is not legal, but
I'm not anticipating any law suits. This work, the plot line, and the
characters introduced that are not already featured on Buffy the Vampire
Slayer are the work of Joshua Jericho Born, Copyright 1998.


==============

Scene 5

Standing innocently in the doorway, Buffy lingered outside of Giles' library
office. Giles himself had his attentions buried in an particularly interesting
read of a book. A few pages went by before Giles finally donned his glasses to
look over a sheepish, quiet Slayer.

"Oh, Buffy, I hadn't noticed you there. Is something a matter?" questioned
Giles.

"Well, I don't know how to say this, but I was talking with Willow yesterday,"
slowly articulated Buffy.

"Are things not all well between you and Willow?" Giles inquired softly.

"No," quickly replied Buffy with an unsure expression.

She finally admitted, "Yes." Buffy explained, "You see it's just that I've
been spending so much time with the slayage around Abel's crypt and Oz is
still out there."

"Ah, and I suppose you want me to tell you it would be fine for you to neglect
your duties and pursue locating Oz with more of your time," guessed Giles.

"That'd be perfect," smiled Buffy.

"You do realize that this is not only a choice opportunity to slay vampires,
but that if a vampire fed on Abel and consequently killed him that the gateway
Abel sealed would be reopend, giving way for more necromancers to come into
our world. As your Watcher I can't very well endorse you forsaking your
responsiblities," reminded Giles officiously.

Buffy dropped her head and remained silent.

"As an adult and dare I say father figure, however, I can tell you that there
are times in one's life when the welfare of those close to you are many times
greater in your heart than responsibilities that one doesn't even want," added
Giles. 

Her head now raised, Buffy quizzically glanced a the grin on her Watcher's
face. She answered it a small smirk of her own.

"Thanks," said Buffy plainly. Giles nodded in awknowledgement, seeming larger
than life.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "J. Jericho Born" <traction@sirius.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Flies to Honey" (07/?) sequel to "The Necromancer"
Date: 09 Oct 1998 22:53:37 -0700

TITLE: "Flies to Honey" (Part 07/?)
AUTHOR: J. Jericho Born
E-MAIL: traction@sirius.com
FEEDBACK: Please let me know what you think of my fanfic with some feedback.
DISTRIBUTION: The author reserves rights on this story. Please do not
distribute without expressed permission.
RATING: PG-13  Contains violence.
SPOILERS: Spoilers to previous fanfic.
DESCRIPTION: The sequel to "The Necromancer". Abel is now unconcious, but
attracting vampires like flies to honey. Buffy is caught between protecting
her enemy and helping her friend Willow find her beloved Oz. Meanwhile, Willow
gets deeper into magic and the occult in order to find a way to restore Oz to
human form.
DISCLAIMER: The writer of this unauthorized fan fiction is not affiliated with
any of the parties involved in the making of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The
characters are the property of Joss Whedon and whomever else the lawyers may
deem fit, they are used without permission. Technically that is not legal, but
I'm not anticipating any law suits. This work, the plot line, and the
characters introduced that are not already featured on Buffy the Vampire
Slayer are the work of Joshua Jericho Born, Copyright 1998.


==============

Scene 6

"Wow," said an intrigued Willow, her voice tapered the one sylable word. She
eagerly punched away at the page down key of her laptop. Curious, Xander
leaned over from the other side of the Library table.

"What are you looking at?" he asked.

"Well, I found out a way to hopefully change Oz back to a human, but it kind
of needs a little hellfire to work," explained Willow readily.

"So are you reading up on hellfire?" further asked Xander.

"Well, no. There wasn't much known about hellfire, so I started reading on how
a necromancer becomes a necromancer. This is pretty sad," Willow said, eyeing
the screen in front of her.

Xander comforted, "Come on, Willow, you're not being that desperate." 

"I meant how they become a necromancer is sad," Willow chastised. She
questioned, "Did you know that when a necromancer seeks an apprentice he looks
for people in the most vulnerable, frustrated walks of life?"

"No, but it makes sense. Who better to become an ultra bad villian guy then
someone who can't get a girl to notice him," Xander commented. He continued,
accelerating into a ramble, "And then when she does she only thinks he's a
pathetic loser. Finally, when she get's over how demeaning it is to be seen
with him she puts him down at every opportunity to make herself feel
important. But, I'm a man who has feelings, too. I'm not just her whipping
boy-"

Xander interuppted himself, "What were we talking about again?"

"Like I was saying. They find someone who's already sick of the world and come
to him in a nightmare. They torture that person in his sleep by showing him
the most grusome horrors of man's inhumanity to man. By the time the dream is
over he's an even more broken soul. Only after that do they offer
apprenticeship," described Willow.

"Wow, and I thought colleges had aggresive recruiting programs," wryly joked
Xander.

"This is like our first villian with a sob story. I mean, vampires get sired
and then they're vampires. Demons are demons. But, this guy is a human being
who's had a past and a childhood and develeoped in the monster that he is,"
Willow observed with a touch of compassion.

"Well that doesn't change the fact that he is the monster that he is. Right
now, this guy being a vegetable is justice," redirected Xander.

"I guess. But, can you imagine how horrible his life must have been for a
necromancer to pick him for an apprentice," offered Willow.

"You're not getting all soft on him are you?" Xander questioned.

"No. It's just that the more I learn about where Abel's coming from, the
harder it is for me to hate him," answered Willow.

"Hey, guys," greeted Buffy, emerging from Giles' office.

"Buffy-" began Willow, but she was cut short.

"I've thought about what you said and I've finally really got my priorities
straight," interjected Buffy.

"I'm sorry for being so stuck up before," apologized Willow sincerely.

"It's ok. It's to be expected considering what you've been through. Anyway,
there've been reports of a 'bigfoot' type monster in Weberton. It sounds
promising so I figure after school tommorrow we can head up there for the
weekend and see if we can bring Oz home," said Buffy, mixed emotions bleeding
through at different times in her statement.

"Great! I'll brush up on some witchcraft stuff, it might help us to find him,"
Willow said excitedly.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Aglx@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (23/25)
Date: 10 Oct 1998 18:55:25 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (23/25)
Author: AnGeL X (Aglx@aol.com)
Distrbution: Just Ask & Keep my name attached!
Spoilers: Takes place after Becoming
Rating: PG/PG-13 Violence. - None for this part
Description: Buffy/Angel Love Story.
Disclaimer: Plot Mine. Characters all but Savarah are mine!
I own nothing that's really Buffy, never will, don't sue. 
Feedback: I live for it. I also refuse to write without it!

    Xander and Cordelia burst into the library with two bags
filled with the supplies Willow requested. Their sudden intrusion
interrupted Buffy's sword fight with Angel. Angel wasn't distracted
by their appearance and took a swing at Buffy's head, assuming she
would have blocked it.
     Buffy ducked just in time to avoid the blade hitting her
neck.
     "Angel!"
     "Sorry. I *thought* you would block it!"
     "Likely excuse," Buffy said with a grin.
     "Here's the stuff you asked us to get." Cordelia said
squeamishly handing over the bag she was carrying to Willow. "What
are we supposed to do with all those smelly plants?"
Ignoring Cordelia, Willow moved to instruct everyone on the
plan. "Angel, Buffy, Xander. You'll need to leave the room."
     "Why?" Buffy asked defensively.
     "The ritual is very strict about who can be in the room and
exactly how many. Buffy, you and Angel are too close to Savarah to
be able to perform this. Xander, well, the ritual only needs the help
of three."
     "Fine by me. I've had enough of all this."
     "Why do I have to help?"
     "Cordelia, could you please just not argue with me now.
This is not the time."
     "Fine."
     Buffy, Angel and Xander left the library and waited outside.
They listened to Willow's chanting and could smell the putrid aroma
that came from the burning of herbs and oils.
     Several minutes passed and finally Cordelia came crashing out
of the library, her lungs filled with smoke from the fire.
     "Are you okay?!" Xander asked as he tried to comfort her.
     "Yeah, never been better. They're done in there."
     Buffy and Angel rushed back into the library and anticipated
the result of the ritual.
     "We did it! She won't be able to curse you this time. If you
win, you win," Willow shrieked with a giant grin on her face.
     "Thank you, Willow," Angel said while hugging Willow.

* * * * *
    Buffy and Angel walked down the deserted sidewalk next to
the graveyard. Their heads, filled with millions of thoughts.
Thoughts of love, of revenge and of regret. Wondering if they
would ever be free of the devil, Savarah. If they would ever be
free of the guilty pain they both suffered from equally. 
     Angel stopped and grabbed Buffy by the arm. He spun her
around to face him. "You sure you want to do this?"
     "Do I have a choice?"
     Angel dropped his head.
     "Hey, don't take this on yourself. It's my fault we're
in this mess."
     "When are you going to stop blaming yourself."
     "When it stops being the truth.  Angel, you know just as
well as I do, that this all comes back..."
     Angel pressed his lips against hers.  Her body went limp
in his arms. "I don't want to lose you."
     "I don't want to lose you either," Buffy said innocently
as she watched him fight against the demon inside him.  It had
been so long since they had been close to each other but the
painful memories kept them at a distance.
     "Are you ready to accept the consequences this may bring?"
     "What's with the twenty questions? I'm ready and willing
to fight her."
     "Great. Then let's go!" Said a cocky voice from behind them.
Buffy and Angel both turned around to see Savarah leaning up against
the same tree as before. Somehow they managed to meet her again in
the same place. "I mean, if you two are ready."
     The both looked at each other for a second, questioning if
they really were ready. "Let's go!" Angel said, his face distorting
to his alter ego.
     "I noticed you sunk to my level by binding my spell casting
powers. Very clever."
     "I wanted a fair game," Buffy said bluntly.
     "It'll be fair alright. But I have just one little rule."
     "Oh yeah, almost forgot. Can't play a game with you without
rules," Buffy said.
     "Oh, but that is my one rule. No rules, no limits, just
pure, bloody fun!"

~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Can't you just feel the tension? Big fight coming next. 

-Michelle



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Aglx@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (24/25)
Date: 11 Oct 1998 16:29:46 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (24/25)
Author: AnGeL X (Aglx@aol.com)
Distrbution: Just Ask & Keep my name attached!
Spoilers: Takes place after Becoming
Rating: PG-13 Violence & Gore. Come on, it's a fight!
Description: Buffy/Angel Love Story.
Disclaimer: Plot Mine. Characters all but Savarah aren't mine!
I own nothing that's really Buffy, never will, don't sue. 
Feedback: I live for it. I also refuse to write without it!

      Without bothering with a thought, Angel lunged at her,
hoping that by some small chance, he could catch her off guard.
Just as he was about to make contact, Savarah side-stepped him,
forcing him to land face first on the cold muddy ground.
      "You know this really isn't a great place for me to work.
How about right over there." With the movement of her hand Savarah
lifted Angel off the ground and sent him flying into the cemetery.  A 
headstone broke his fall as he landed painfully. 
      Buffy winced as he hit, but kept her emotions from getting
the best of her. She had to keep Savarah busy long enough for
Angel to kill her. That was their only chance of survival.
      "Shall we join him?" Before Buffy had the chance to protest
or even offer the concept of walking, they were both flying towards
Angel at a speed to fast for the human eye to notice. As Buffy
reached down to check on Angel, Savarah pushed her away with her
boot.  "Don't think so sweetie. This is between you and me."
      "Fine with me if you want to play with even odds." Buffy
took the first shot, hitting Savarah solidly on the jaw.  It felt
like punching a steel wall but she didn't let that show.  Savarah
returned it with a swift backhand that knocked Buffy off balance.
The two went at it, throwing punches left and right, trying to see
who would wear down first. Buffy knew she couldn't keep this up
forever, and Savarah could.
      Hoping that Angel would get up and offer some assistance
soon, Buffy kept at the game. A few kicks to her stomach, followed
by a direct hit to Savarah's kneecap was the closest she could come
to offering this creature any pain.
      Finally, Angel rose from the ground and kicked Savarah in
in the face.  His hit actually had an effect on the unkillable
demon.  She fell back and landed on her back.
      "Sorry Angel, you don't get to play!" With a quick movement
with her hands, a stake flew out and hit Angel in the chest. He
flew straight back, crashing into the wall of a mausoleum and
falling unconscious to the ground.
      Horror struck Buffy as she realized, Savarah might have
just killed him.  But she was actually relieved to see that the
stake only punctured his left lung.  Buffy rushed to his side,
screaming his name. She watched him just lie there motionlessly
and decided she had to remove the stake. Gripping it with her hands
she prepared to rip it out while he was already unconscious.
      "I don't think so, sweetheart." Savarah kicked Buffy in the
face, sending her flying backwards. Away from Angel.  "You can tend
to your poor lover when were done. Assuming you somehow survive it."
Savarah stepped over Angel's body, and walked over to Buffy. She was
just getting to her feet when Savarah approached and sent her soaring
through the air yet again.
      This time, she crashed against the tree upside-down. The trunk
successfully knocked her upon the head and sent her tumbling
to the ground. Her face plastered into the cold marshy ground, Buffy
just wished the blow would send her into unconsciousness.
      No such luck.  She was alive, awake, and very much aware of
the pain.
      "Don't even think of blacking out on me." Savarah grabbed
Buffy's hair and peeled her body off the ground. Buffy's body went
limp as she rose into the air. Savarah waited, almost patiently for
Buffy to do something.
      Nothing.
      "Wake up! You're little game of opossum won't work with me."
 Buffy's foot struck backwards landing heavily in Savarah's
stomach.   Her body fell to the ground as Savarah reeled from the
blow.
      "Good! You're getting smarter."
      "I learn from my enemies." Buffy sent a roundhouse kick at
Savarah with every bit of strength she had left in her. She wasn't
going to quit. Not yet.
      She dove over a grave stone and crashed head first into
Savarah. The two tumbled to the ground, finally stopping when they
hit a tree.  Buffy winced and stood up quickly. Already, she had
several broken ribs which would heal. The problem was, they might
not heal soon enough.
      Savarah climbed to her feet, her eyes now a pitch black.  Standing 
rigidly, Savarah stretched out her arms, hands spread.  Her fingers 
reaching as if for the ground that they would never touch.  Buffy felt 
something grab her and lift her up into the air.  She hung there by
nothing, pinned against the tree, several feet from the ground.
      "Let's face it. The world's not meant for the both of us. You
are causing me too many problems."
      "What? Big, bad devil girl can't take a little competition."
      "What can I say? I don't work well with competition." Savarah
took a few steps towards Buffy.  Her voice lowered to a near whisper.
      "But, this time, you don't have your precious lover to protect you.
He's gone.  And even if he does survive. He'll never be able to save
you."
      Buffy felt her stomach twist.  Who was going to save her this
time?  This wasn't good. She kept getting herself into situations where
only others could save her.  If she survived this, she really needed
to work on the caution thing. She closed her eyes, hoping it would help
everything go faster.
      Savarah's fingers slowly started to curl, forming a fist in
slow motion.  The invisible thing holding Buffy hostage tightened its
grip around her like a vice. She struggled to move, to breathe. Both
were getting harder to do every second.
      As the hands possessed by the devil finally closed up tightly,
Buffy could feel her bones breaking under the pressure. Her already
broken ribs were making it almost impossible to breath.
      "Sorry Slayer. This fight had to end sooner or later. And
I'm a fan of sooner."
      Buffy's eyes shut. Her mind raced with thoughts, anything
to focus on besides the pain.  Buffy couldn't believe this was
happening. Again. After all she'd been through to save her own life as
well as Angel's, this was how she was repaid.  Forced to live a life
she would give anything not to do, risking her life every day so the
world could go on living.  And now she was in the grips of the devil, so
to speak, the life being crushed out of her while Savarah looked on
laughing. This wasn't good.
      Buffy made a last attempt to struggle against the demon. She
failed, horribly. No longer did she have control over her body or
mind. Everything was slowing slipping away to the point of her ended
existence.
      Everything suddenly went black as Buffy's body crashed to
ground. The sickening sound of broken bones as they hit was the last
thing she heard before blacking out completely.  Everything ended.

* * * *
      Everything was gone. Her mind no longer filled with thoughts,
her body no longer filled with pain. Just numb. Everything was numb.

     Buffy groaned as she took in a painful breath.  Her eyes slowly
opened to pure black.  There was nothing to be seen. As she focused
more, the star filled midnight black sky and glowing full moon towered
above her.  She sat up, and looked around. Trees, grass, gravestones.
She was in a cemetery. Whether it was the ever-so-popular Sunnydale
Graveyard, she couldn't tell.  She didn't want to.  < Am I dead? Is
this Heaven? Or Hell? >  Recognizing the scenery as the same 
cemetery, Buffy looked over to the spot where Savarah stood. Only now, 
she was gone and someone else occupied the small patch of grass.
      Her eyes traced the body from feet to head until she recognized
the figure standing there before her.
      "One down, two to go!" The creature hissed.

* * * * * *
Who could it be? Hmm, I wonder...

The end coming next....



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Aglx@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Love's Revival (25/25)
Date: 11 Oct 1998 20:13:09 EDT

Title: Love's Revival (25/25)
Author: AnGeL X (Aglx@aol.com)
Distrbution: Just Ask & Keep my name attached!
Spoilers: Takes place after Becoming
Rating: PG-13.
Description: Buffy/Angel Love Story.
Disclaimer: Plot Mine. Characters all but Savarah aren't mine! The 
poetry exercpt is mine. I wrote that poem a long while ago, but the
words fit with the scene, so I used them.  I own nothing that's really 
Buffy, never will, don't sue. 
Feedback: I live for it. I'd love to hear what everyone thinks about how
I ended things. I agonized over what to do with this for a long while!

Thanks so much to my editors rihanon, BMTHESPIAN, and 
Laura.Diehl@widener.edu for their help with this story. 

* * * * *

      "Spike," Buffy said, her voice barely an audible whisper.
      He didn't say anything; he only stared at her.

      * * * * * * * * *

      Crystal blue stared at you.
      The pain of eternity engraved.

      A heart broken a million times over
      A soul beyond repair

      * * * * * * * * *

      She looked at the demon, and for the first time, she felt
sorry for him.  Silently cursing herself for having any such pity
for a demon--other than Angel--Buffy held back the feeling burning
in her gut.  She began to regain her senses and emotions came first.
Rushing at her from all directions, with every intention of
destroying her.
      "Am I dead?" Buffy held a hand to her head to steady the
spinning area.  Although most of the deadly damage caused by
Savarah was healed, she still had her share of battle wounds which
caused significant pain whenever she was required to move, or think
      "Not yet."
      "Savarah?" Buffy gasped.
      "I killed her. That bitch had been mucking things up for
far too long."
      "But..." Buffy was confused and disoriented. Dying takes
a lot out of a person.  Buffy steadied herself with the help of
the tree and slowly lifted herself to her feet.
      Spike didn't let her finish. He simply charged until
she was back on the ground and he was on top of her. Buffy was
nearly defenseless against him and the continual punches he threw
at her.
      The beating she had taken from Savarah was still fresh and
Spike was only reawakening the wounds.  Finally, when she knew she
couldn't take much more, she brought up her left knee and knocked
him off of her.
      Buffy's body just lay there, defenseless to the world.
Her eyes squinted as she tried to find Spike in the blackness.

* * * * *

      As Buffy awaited her death brought on by one of her greatest
enemies, Angel was slowly regaining consciousness.  The first sight
that caught his eyes was Spike straddling Buffy's lifeless body.
She wasn't moving and Spike was still throwing punches.
      Instinctively, Angel tried to roll over and get to his feet but
immediately found the stake protruding from his chest was too much
of an obstacle.  Rolling over onto his back, Angel gripped the stake
with both hands and ripped it from his lung.  He cried out as the wood
separated from his flesh and Spike was distracted for a brief second
from Buffy.
      "Stay down, Angel. I'll get to you soon enough," Spike yelled
over his shoulder before hitting Buffy with another punch.
      Angel, now free of the stake, rolled to his side, wincing at
the pain but fighting against anything more. He had to save Buffy or
else Spike would take her life, for sure.  He crawled to his knees
and then lifted himself to his feet.  Angel stumbled until he was a
few feet away from Spike.
     Spike was too preoccupied with Buffy and killing her painfully--
so she would remember in her last moment what she did to his
Drusilla--that he didn't even notice that Angel had made it to his feet.

      After a few seconds of pulling together all the strength that
he had left, Angel tackled Spike, knocking him off of Buffy.  The two
tumbled down a hill until they both collided with the wall of the
cemetery.
      Buffy gasped as Spike's weight was lifted from her chest. Her
face was a bruised and bloody mess which would take some time to heal,
even for the Slayer.
      Spike was the first to get up and took full advantage. Grabbing
Angel's shoulders, he slammed his head up against the brick wall lining
the cemetery.
      "Damn you!" Angel hissed.  Angel glared at Spike with hatred in his
eyes which he narrowed to tiny slits.  The feeling was mutual.
      "It's a little too late for that, don't you think?" Taking
a handful of Angel's hair, Spike slammed his head against the wall
again, hoping eventually it would knock him out.
      Grabbing Spike by his shoulders, Angel lashed out with a foot
and sent Spike flying backwards.  "Spike, I killed you once, and I'll
gladly do it again!"
      "You're welcome to try!" Spike flipped up to his feet and
stood hands on hips waiting for Angel to get up. "I've got no problem
killing you before that bitch of yours."
      Reaching for his head with one hand and the wall with the
other, Angel stood up to meet his challenger.
      Spinning, Spike hit Angel across the face with one hand and
then the other. Before stopping he also hit him with a spinning kick
that sent his brunette sire back to the ground.
      Two gentle fingers tapped on Spike's shoulder as he waited
for Angel to get up. "Spike."
      He spun around to meet the eyes of the Slayer. She was out
cold a few minutes ago.
      "I'm all better now," she said cockily.  "You want to fight?
Why don't you try someone who can take you on, fairly."
      "Oh, but beating the bloody hell out of Angel is much more
fun. You should try it sometime."
      "Already have. I'd much rather beat the hell out you." With
a right uppercut, Buffy broke Spike's nose on contact.  < That's it. 
She dies, now! > Spike responded with a kick
to her stomach that sent her reeling. "You bitch. You think you can
just kill Drusilla and get away with it?"
      "Spike, it was a long time coming."
      Narrowing his brow, Spike lunged at her but she side stepped
him and he hit a tree instead. When he got up, Buffy was nowhere to
be seen.  But he smelled her. Following his nose, Spike was lead up
to the top of a hill. There she was, just on the other side digging
frantically into her slayer bag for something to kill him with.
      "Here I come, ready or not," Spike said under his breath as
he slid down the hill towards her.
      She looked up at him, unarmed and almost frightened. All her
stakes were gone and she was stuck fighting him the hard way.
      "Hello," he said, standing with his arms crossing his chest.
"Lose something?"
      "Uh, well, uh..." Buffy didn't need to finish because Spike
had just fallen into her trap.
      Recognizing a tiny grin on her face, Spike turned around, but
it was too late. Angel had already taken a stake a plunged it into his
back.  Exploding into dust, Spike shattered, ashes drifting to the
ground.
      "Nope. Didn't loose a thing," Buffy said getting to her feet
and rushing into Angel's arms.
      Wincing, Angel pushed Buffy gently away from his wounded chest
and looked her straight in the eye. "I love you."
      "I love you." Buffy wrapped her arms around his waste again
and Angel let her, ignoring any pain. "Angel, let's go home."
      "Never have those words sounded so sweet."
      Buffy smiled and guided Angel out of the cemetery. They were
finally free of three of the deadliest demons in the world.
      "Giles will be so proud. All in one night, too. That has to be
a record."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

The End



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: dreamscape <angelus@mediaone.net>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: POEM: Endure by Dreamscape205
Date: 12 Oct 1998 02:01:00 -0400

Title: Endure
Author: Dreamscape205
Email:  Angelus@mediaone.net
Spoiler:  Anne
Distribution:  Please ask first.  You can find this and all my
work at my site
Feedback:  you betcha
Disclaimer:  Everything BtVS belongs to Joss Whedon, The WB, Fox
etc
Author's Note:  I realize Anne aired two weeks ago, but with my
work schedule, I just watched it and the 2nd episode tonight.  I
also realized with this poem it's been since May that I last
wrote anything.  Anyway, thanks for reading...

******************
ENDURE


Lost in confusion
Alone in madness
Travelling an endless
River of despair

My subconscious attempt
To comfort my ache
Brings you forth in dreams

It's a lie to myself
I realize as I wake
While grief and loneliness
Fill me to the brink

I have no choice
I must go on
I will endure

I will endure





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: DaniLynn27@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: I'll Wait (1/1)
Date: 12 Oct 1998 12:15:45 EDT

TITLE: I'll Wait
AUTHOR: Danielle Loughlin (aka Prophecy Girl)
E-MAIL: DaniLynn27@aol.com
DISTRIBUTION: My site. I can't imagine anyone would want this little fic, but
if you like, take. Just tell me where it's going.
FEEDBACK: Please!
SUMMARY: Takes place during Becoming 2, the scene with Willow/Xander in the
hospital, told from Xander's POV
SPOILERS: Through B2
RATING: G
DISCLAIMER: Willow, Xander, and Oz are all Joss Whedon's creation. I just
borrowed them to alleviate my boredom. 

Just a little fic I wrote, taking a break from Losing You. I can't believe I'm
such a Willow/Xander 'shipper. I love Willow/Oz together. Huh. Oh well, enjoy.

I'll Wait

Note: words in <<>> denote thoughts.

Xander Harris reached across the pale peach hospital blanket and took Willow
Rosenberg's hand in his own. It was so unnerving. His cheerful, vibrant
Willow, reduced to a still, pale form in a hospital bed. Her hand didn't even
respond to his, it just hung limply. Xander held it tightly, trying to will
life into it. 

"Look, Will," he started. "You don't have a choice here. You gotta wake up."
He looked down at her as he talked, desperately searching for some sign she
was hearing him, and despairing when there was none. "I mean, who's going to
help me pass math? And who am I going to call every night . .and talk about
what we did all day?"

"I need you, Will," Xander said. He felt like screaming. Willow was slipping
away from him and there was nothing he could do about it. He'd never felt so
helpless in his life. Or so scared. He refused to let the person he loved most
in the world slip away from him like this. He looked at Willow's pale face,
searching for the words that would magically wake her up. 

"I love you," he finally said. And he did. He wasn't sure how he just knew but
he did. It just felt right. Maybe that's what would bring her back. His love.

He was so lost in his thoughts he almost didn't feel Willow's hand move in his
own. His heart jumped into his throat. <<Oh please, let her wake up>>, Xander
prayed. Suddenly there was nothing he wanted more but for her to open her eyes
and see him there. He wanted her to open her eyes and realize it was Xander
who brought her back, Xander who loved her. <<Maybe she'll even say she loves
me too>>, he thought. He realized how much he wanted to hear her say that.

Willow's head moved slightly. Her eyes didn't open, but her lips moved, trying
to form a word. "Oz?" she whispered. 

Xander's heart plummeted to his shoes. She thinks it's Oz. She wants to open
her eyes and see Oz. Well, of course. Oz is who she'd expect to say loved her.
Not me. Not me.

"Oz?" Willow repeated, louder this time. She hadn't opened her eyes yet.

"Hey, baby, I'm here," a voice said. Xander turned and saw Oz enter the room,
heading straight for Willow and taking her hands in his own. 

"She's just starting to wake up," Xander told Oz. He backed away, letting Oz
take his place. Willow was going to see Oz. Not Xander. "I'm going to get a
doctor," he said, making an escape. 

Outside the room, Xander hit his head against the wall. He sighed. <<You blew
it, Harris. She doesn't love you anymore.>> The thought made him sad. 

Something he'd said once came back to him. <<" People never want what's right
in front of them. They always want what they can't have. The more
unattainable, the more attractive.">> Funny. He'd figured he wasn't going to
fall victim to that trap. But he was just like the rest of them. 

He wanted Willow, but he couldn't have her. Not while she loved Oz. He sighed
again, resigned. No, he couldn't have her now. He wasn't going to say anything
now, not going to complicate her life. He'd wait. Someday. When the time was
right. All that mattered right now was that Willow was going to be okay. And
right now, Willow needed to be with Oz. Oz was good for her. And Oz did love
her. <<And I have Cordy>>, he thought. <<And I do love her.>> No, the time's
not right. He and Willow would be together someday. But not now.

But he'd wait. 


*finis*



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: taygeta@juno.com (C. Catherine)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Capeside: the Hellmouth (15/?)
Date: 19 Oct 1998 18:03:03 -0700

TITLE: Capeside: the Hellmouth #15 Changes in Circumstances 
AUTHOR: Taygeta
E-MAIL: taygeta@juno.com
DISTRIBUTION: Sure...just tell me where it's gonna go.
RATING: PG
SERIES: A Dawson's Creek/Buffy Crossover
DISCLAIMER: The characters and any other reference to Dawson's Creek are
the property of, creator, Kevin Williamson. The characters portrayed and
in reference to Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to its creator Joss
Whedon, and it's owners Mutant Enemy Productions, Kuzui Enterprises,
Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox.  In other words, they do not
belong to me and I am just borrowing them.  The only thing that is mine
is this weird story.  No copyright infringement is intended.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Capeside: the Hellmouth
#15 Changes in Circumstances
By: Taygeta

"Buffy," Willow rushed to her friend's side, "The Head Magistrates told
me everything.  Do you think they're okay?"

"I think Giles and Ms. Calendar can hold their own," she replied
uneasily, "So, where are these Magistrates you were talking about?"

"We, Chosen One, are here," a voice echoed in the room.

"And it is your first task to prove who you are by finding us," a
feminine voice followed with the same resonance.

Buffy and Xander glanced at each other with knowing expressions as they
recognized one of the voices to be of the former, Mr. Snyder, troll-like
principal of Sunnydale High.  

The slayer sighed reluctantly, "Snyder's under the table and whoever the
other magistrate is, well, you're in the closet."

The two Magistrates came from their hiding places with shocked
expressions.  Snyder had his hand against his mouth in an agape
expression, "She really is multi-talented…she even knew my name."

"Are you sure you're not a witch by trade?" the female witch queried
suspiciously.

"I'm sure.  Actually, um, I saw your robes sticking out from the closet
and beneath the table…didn't exactly match the décor," she smiled, "Also,
we knew him from before…where we came."

Snyder followed with a wide grin as he approached her and took her hands
into his, "Oh, you did?  I hope I was very kind to you, Chosen One.  I
hope that my alter ego proved to be useful to you."

She stared at him for a second and then glanced at Xander who was trying
very hard not to burst out laughing.  Keeping a sheepish smile she found
herself speechless as she looked into his eager eyes, obviously waiting
for a complimentary statement.

"Magistrate Snyder, you're alter ego's actions proved to be more than
sufficient to our …um annoy - needs," interjected Xander carefully.

The magistrate eyed him carefully, still holding onto her hands, "Who are
you?"

Buffy quickly removed her hands from Snyder's slimy grasp and stood
beside Xander, "He's my boyfriend…"

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"You…um…think we should give them a little leeway so that they think we
might be giving into all of this?"  Jenny said after awhile as she and
Giles sat in the cold, clammy cell they had been thrown into after the
first interrogation process had finished.

"Might be a good idea," he nodded, "What kind of leeway are we talking
about here?"

"Something like, we have knowledge about interdimensional travel?" she
replied with a shrug.

"That sounds like enough," Giles sighed.

Silence engulfed them once again and the darkness of the room, lighted
only by a dim candle from outside, did little to help the situation.

"Jenny, I'm rather sorry about my treatment of you prior to everything,"
he said suddenly looking up at her.

She smiled, "It's all right, Rupert, I was equally horrid in my own
right, I guess I felt that my "space" was being invaded that I didn't
realize that it was the same for you.  Especially since you had been a
watcher a long time before I had even got initiated."

"Well, let's just hope that when we get out of here, we can make up for
past wrongs," he replied.  "Seeing as how we're going to be here awhile,
why not get through with that part of getting to know each other that we
skipped for fear of too much bonding?  Go ahead, ask me any question you
like…that is…within good limits."

"I've been kind of wondering about that girl of yours, y'know the one you
lost back home?" she asked, "What was she like?"

He smiled as she looked at her, "She was the most wonderful breath of
fresh air that I have ever come to know…."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Code Blue!  Code Blue!  Room 256!" the nurse's intercom blared and Dr.
Carlisle came running with a stream of doctors behind him.

"Oh dear God, that's Jen's room," Mrs. Lindley replied as she glanced at
Angel, who helped her precarious form up, "Please, Lord, don't take her
away from me now."

They both walked towards the room and saw the doctors trying to
resuscitate Jen and Angel looked at Mrs. Lindley and whispered,
"Please…please don't take her away from us now.  I never told her how
much I cared."

Despite their cries to Jen's survival, the flat-line of the heart monitor
continued it's high-pitched, heart-piercing whine.  Finally Dr. Carlisle
moved away from the bed and turned off the heart monitor.  

"There's nothing more we can do, the injuries she sustained were too
great.  I call the time of death at 3:45 p.m."

"No!"  Mrs. Lindley cried, as her form fell in a crouched position by the
door, "No…"

"Shhh…" Angel hushed softly, "It's going to be okay, Mrs. Lindley, you're
going to be all right."

The powdered hair woman glanced at him with red eyes, "How is it going to
be all right, Angel?  Tell me.  How will it be all right?  My
granddaughter is no longer with us and I accept that.  I accept that God
felt she needed to return, but now I'm all alone…more alone than I've
ever been before.  There's always been someone, Angel, and now…now
there's no one."

He looked as her fiery eyes softened to a sad glaze and shook his head,
"There's still someone…there's still Buffy, I know she'll be there for
you and Joey and Xander…they might not be related to you, but they still
care about you as if they are.  A - and there's me."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Xander gave Buffy her a "your boyfriend" Look and she muttered under her
breath, "Just go along with it."

Snyder simpered and extended his hand, "Nice to meet you…um…er…"

"Xander…Xander Harris," he replied with a deep breath wondering what in
the world was going on.  

Joey and Willow stood in a corner trying not to laugh and Joey coughed
and replied, "And I'm Joey Potter."

"Quite the brigade you have, Chosen One," the other magistrate said as
she looked about the room, "I always thought your identity was a rather
closed-off subject."

"Well, I guess I'm special, then," Buffy replied, "Magistrate…uh…"

"Jacobs…Tamara Jacobs," she said extending a hand and then glanced at her
robe, "I suppose this bulky things do give us away constantly, Snyder."

"Well, Jacobs, much we can do about traditional robes," he said.

"Um, if you guys don't mind, shouldn't we be devising a plan to help Mr.
Giles and Ms. Calendar?"  Buffy interrupted with raised eyebrows.

Tamara said, "Of course…of course, it's just that we've never had the
Chosen One in our presence…it's rather awing, actually."

"If you don't mind…Buffy will do just fine," she said nodding her head.

"Oh, of course…Buffy," Tamara said trying the name carefully and then
turned to her colleague, "Come along, Snyder, we have work to do."

"Yes, of course, if you will excuse us," he nodded and they walked out of
the room.

"Care to explain, *Chosen One*," Xander said with raised eyebrows, "about
how I suddenly came to be known as the Boyfriend?"

Willow approached, "I can explain that…you see, in the Witch community
it's not surprisingly to find that older witches are with younger woman. 
I hate to say it, but…um…I was this close to be engaged to that."

"Ew, much?" Buffy cringed, "You didn't tell me *that*!"

"Reason why I didn't," she echoed the cringed, "Anyway, if you're not
'taken' per se, older witches tend to have the power to 'take you.'"

Xander nodded in understanding as he glanced at Buffy, "And it must be an
honor of honors to be with the Chosen One."

"Precisely," the slayer replied, "And since you were the only other guy
in the room, I wasn't left with much of an anchor choice, was I?  So, now
that we've got that explained, I'm going to go see what's up."

"Thank you," he shouted back at her when she walked out of the room,
"Figures the only time I'm actually her boyfriend is when Snyder stands
as the other choice."

Joey glanced at him with a laugh, "Oh, admit it, Xander…you're totally
reveling in this idea."

He smiled and did a "Fargo" imitation, "You bettcha."

___________________________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: sah <romana@mindspring.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: ADMIN:  List rules
Date: 13 Oct 1998 13:09:12

Welcome!  This list is for fiction related to "Buffy The Vampire 
Slayer," both the TV series and the movie.  To ensure that we all get 
to enjoy as much fiction as possible, please adhere to the following 
guidelines, and please save them for future reference.

1. Fiction should have Buffy characters in it and clearly be related 
to Buffy.  Crossovers are great, and expected, but general 
vampire/monster stories that aren't in the Buffy universe and don't 
use Buffy characters belong somewhere else.

2. Discussion of posted fiction is permitted onlist.  Please put 
"DISCUSS" in your subject line.  Requests for missing story parts 
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Discussion that is not related directly to the fiction should go over 
to the general Buffy list.  Discussion of fiction is expected to 
follow common netiquette guidelines and use PG-13 language.

3. No advertising of <any> items or services, Buffy related or not, 
and no posting of non-story items such as .gifs, sound files, etc..  
No attached files of <any> kind-- if your mailer makes your fiction 
into attached files, you need to find another way to get it to the list.

4. If you're writing a story and including advance information on a 
new episode, and you're posting your story earlier than the national 
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     **Mark the post as a "spoiler" in the subject header.  
     **Leave about twelve lines (blank or with non-spoiler info) at 
          the top of the post.

This ensures that anyone who doesn't like knowing about an episode 
ahead of time is "protected."  :)   The blank space is for people whose 
mailers automatically open up the next piece of mail, without giving 
them a chance to see "spoiler" in the header.

Spoiler warnings are not necessary after the start of the episode's 
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5.  This list is absolutely NOT for erotic fiction.  <Nothing> stronger 
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"Mr. Grim Reaper, could you turn around?"  --overheard at FrightFest



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "J. Jericho Born" <traction@sirius.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: "The Necromancer"
Date: 13 Oct 1998 21:35:10 -0700

I'm not trying to set a record or anything and I don't think I'm violating any
rules, but I have another discussion message to send.

I have a hard time coming up with teasers, those little one or two sentences
that describe your story without giving too much away. Some suggestions of
teasers for my fanfic, "The Necromancer," would help me along. Thanks.

-JB



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: tthwaite@banff.net (tj thwaites)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Full Disclosure (1a/3) by tj thwaites
Date: 14 Oct 1998 19:01:43 -0600


Author's Note: The original version of this story was posted to BBETA way
back in January. I've expanded it enough that I needed to break it into 3
parts and not 2 so I could mail it. Actually, most of part 3 is completely
new. Great big "thank you" to all who sent feedback on the old version. And
believe it of not, I actually took some of your advice. {grin}

Title: Full Disclosure (1/3)
Author: tj thwaites
E-mail: tthwaite@banff.net
Archive: Anya's of course. The mailing list archives, okay. All others
please ask. I'll give you the go ahead, but I just like to know where my
stories are going.
Rating: PG-13, some violence but no worse than an episode.
Spoilers: up to Bad Eggs
Summary: In the aftermath of the incident with the Bazoar, Joyce is having
nightmares. And things are about to get worse.
Disclaimer: The characters we all know and love from BtVS belong to the
Great God Joss. I'm just playing in his back yard for a bit. Also, you'll
probably recognize the stuff from various episodes in the flashback scenes.
(muchos gracias to AleXander for his wonderful work on the Transcripts
available on the Slayerfanfic Archive)
Feedback: Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated at
tthwaite@banff.net. I'll even read flames, but don't expect a reply to
combustable messages.

Now, on with the show---

     Full Disclosure
     by tj thwaites
     (aka tj the dyslexic ferret)




     Summers residence- 3 am

     Buffy was half-way down the hall to her mother's room before she woke
completely. She pushed open the door and hurried inside, hoping she
wouldn't find what she knew she would. Her mother crouched in the corner, a
trail of blankets leading back to the bed.

     [This is the fifth night in a row,] Buffy thought, worried.

     "Get it off me! Get it off me!" Joyce cried, still in the grip of her
nightmare.

     Buffy rushed to her mother's side, reaching out to stop the hands that
were scratching frantically at the top of Joyce's spine. Buffy grabbed her
mother's hands and stared into her wide, terror-filled eyes.

     "Mom!" Buffy called, "Mom! Wake up! You're having a nightmare. Mom,
wake up. You're safe. It's just a dream. I'm here, Mom. I'm here."

     Some of the terror and hysteria retreated from Joyce's expression.
Buffy hugged her tightly, rocking her gently and continued whispering
soothing platitudes in an ironic role reversal. Buffy could feel the
tension slowly leaving her mother's body under her ministrations. She
continued slowly rubbing small circles on her mother's back, easing the
tense muscles, and took a quick glance at the spot her mother had been
scratching earlier. Buffy was hard pressed to subdue the startled gasp that
threatened when she caught sight of the damage revealed by the moonlight
shining in through the window. The normally pale smooth skin along Joyce's
spine, between her shoulder blades, was an angry red, scraped raw and
leaking blood in places.

     Buffy schooled the shock and worry from her expression with
difficulty. The raw area was in the precise location one of those parasites
had latched on to Joyce during that incident last week at the school. Her
Mom couldn't be remembering what really happened that night, could she?

     [Note to self,] Buffy thought, [Pin down Giles first thing in the
morning to talk about this. That 'gas leak' cover story he thought of might
have worked in the heat of the moment, but if the people affected are
starting to remember details, even if it's only in nightmares, we might
have to rethink this whole thing again.]

     "Are you okay, Mom?" Buffy asked as Joyce's breathing and heart rate
finally settled back to something approaching normal, "Do you want to talk
about it?"

     "I'm fine, honey," Joyce replied, "It was just a bad dream. I don't
even remember what it was about now. I'm sorry I woke you."

     "It's okay, Mom. Don't worry about it," Buffy said, "Are you sure you
don't want to talk about it? I could make us some tea."

     "I'm fine, Buffy. Really," Joyce insisted, "I can't remember what it
was about. Just feeling afraid. Helpless. It was just a dream. It's over."

     Joyce shivered at the vague memories and impressions. She scrubbed her
hands over her face, then rubbed one hand over the back over her neck to
smooth away the last vestiges of nightmare induced tension. She winced
slightly as her fingers brushed the raw area over her spine, now suddenly
aware of a dull throbbing there. She jerked her hand away from the sore
spot and stared at the smear of blood across her fingers.

     "What....?" Joyce murmured.

     "You were scratching yourself in your sleep," Buffy ventured, "I think
you broke the skin a couple of times. Come on, Mom. I'll help you clean
that up."

     Joyce numbly stood and followed her daughter into the bathroom. She
kept staring at the blood on her fingers. What could she have been dreaming
about that would make her scratch herself hard enough to draw blood? Joyce
could not remember any details of the nightmare, only a few vague
impressions; a feeling of helplessness, of not being in control of her own
body. She shivered again and quickly banished that line of thought.

     Joyce leaned over the sink, consciously avoiding looking in the
mirror, as Buffy opened the medicine cabinet to retrieve the few first aid
supplies kept there. She grimaced a few times as Buffy first gently washed
the sore area with warm water, then wiped it down with rubbing alcohol.

     "How bad is it?" Joyce asked. A person's back was an awkward place to
injure oneself, difficult to see and reach in order to treat effectively.

     "It's not that bad, Mom," Buffy lied. She could count over a dozen
individual nail tracks crisscrossing the hand-sized raw blemish.

     "You just gave yourself a couple of good scrapes," Buffy elaborated,
"Maybe you should think about getting your nails done soon?"

     Joyce raised her head to look in the mirror at the image of her
daughter peering over her shoulder. She managed a wan smile at Buffy's
attempt to lighten the mood. Joyce sucked in a deep breath through pursed
lips at the stinging sensation as Buffy sprayed Polysporin over the
scratches.

     "After all," Buffy continued, grinning impishly, "We wouldn't want you
to end up doing some serious damage to some guy's back the next time you
date someone."

     "*Buffy*!!" Joyce practically screeched, shocked at the suggestion. Or
rather, its source.

     Buffy's reflection suddenly went beet red as she locked eyes with her
mother.

     "I can't believe I just said that," Buffy  breathed.

      Mother and daughter stared at each other in the mirror for several
minutes, the silence growing increasingly uncomfortable. Finally, Joyce
started chuckling softly.

     "I don't think we have to worry along those lines for a while," she
said softly, a wry smile twisting her lips, "After what happened with Ted
last month, I don't think I'm going to be doing much....um....trolling? Is
that the word I'm looking for?"

     "*Mom*!" Buffy squealed, her fading blush reasserting itself. Vividly.

     Buffy's mouth dropped open when her mother suddenly laughed out loud.
The mischievous twinkle in Joyce's eyes caused Buffy's mind to conjure
images of her mother decked out in something tight and sexy, a drink in
hand, and surrounded by admirers. *Too* weird.

     Joyce stood up straight, putting her arm around her daughter's
shoulders, and grinned into the mirror.

     "Who knows," she quipped, "Maybe one of these years we two could go on
a mother/daughter hunting expedition together?"

     Buffy broke up, gales of laughter erupting.

     "You are so evil, Mom," she gasped between laughs, "Suggesting we
subject an unsuspecting world to such an irresistibly deadly duo as
ourselves."

      Several minutes later, the two women finally managed to control their
guffaws. Turning off the bathroom light, Joyce turned to her daughter.

     "Thank you for cheering me up after that nightmare, Buffy," she said
softly, "Now, I think we both should try to get back to sleep."

     "Okay, Mom," Buffy agreed, "If you're sure you don't want to talk
about it?"

     "I'm sure," Joyce confirmed, "Good night, honey."

     "Mom?" Buffy asked, "Will this little rapprochement contribute to
lifting my house arrest?"

      "Buffy," Joyce said, "I'll sleep on it. We'll talk about over
breakfast, okay?"

     "Good night, Mom," Buffy replied, "A joint hunting expedition, hunh?"

     "Who knows," Joyce returned, shrugging, before disappearing into her
bedroom.

     Buffy climbed back into bed, playing over the exchange in the bathroom
in her mind. As she lay back against the pillows, Buffy realized that her
own comments stemmed from the acceptance (finally, after over a year) that
her mother and father were not going to be getting back together. And that
Buffy herself hoped that her mother would eventually find someone else to
share the rest of her life with. Someone to make her happy.

     =====

     Sunnydale High Library- Lunchtime

     Buffy sat at the library's center table, idly playing with a pencil
instead of actually working on the trig homework she'd been assigned in
class that morning. Willow sat in her customary position in front of what
was considered "her" computer (no one else ever used it, especially not
Giles or the other Slayerettes), researching a biology project for extra
credit. Xander was nowhere to be found; he'd pulled another one of his
disappearing acts that had gotten more frequent over the past month.

     Buffy was uncharacteristically reluctant to broach the subject of her
mother's nightmares to Giles. Last night's determination had faded with the
brightening of the morning. Her mother still claimed she didn't remember
any details of the nightmares when Buffy had asked over breakfast. So she
was left with something of a dilemma. She didn't *know* what her mother's
nightmares had involved, and Joyce's offhand reference to Ted last night
had caught Buffy off guard. Now she was wondering if the nightmares could
possibly be about Ted and not that night last week with the Bazoar and its
hatchlings. It had been bothering her all morning.

     [No, it has to be,] she thought, [The way she was scratching at her
neck is too big  a coincidence.]

     "Giles?" she asked, "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

     "Yes?" Giles replied, coming out of his office.

     Willow looked up from the computer, took one look at the worried
expression on her friend's face and closed down her project.

     "Something wrong, Buffy?" Giles asked as he approached the table.

     "I'm not sure," Buffy answered, "I know Xander and I explained all
that happened with that Bazoar thing, but do either of you actually
remember anything yourselves? Have you had any nightmares?"

     Willow remained silent, looking uncomfortable.

     "No," Giles said, "I don't remember any details. Nor have I
experienced any nocturnal episodes regarding the incident. Are you having
trouble, Buffy?"

     "Not me," Buffy responded, "I can deal with nightmares, I have enough
of them. It's my Mom. I think she's been dreaming about that night. She's
woken up screaming every night for almost a week. She says she doesn't
remember what the dreams are about, but last night...."

     Buffy's died away, her expression morose, her gaze dropping to her
lap. Giles sat down next to her, concerned.

     "She remembered something?" he prodded gently after the silence had
dragged on for nearly a minute.

     "No, but...," Buffy raised a very worried face, her eyes brimming,
"She was scratching.... um, actually, she was *clawing* at the top of her
spine. Where that hatchling had latched on to her. You should have seen it,
Giles. She must have broken the skin a dozen times. There was an area as
big as both my hands just....just....*raw*. All red and bleeding. It scared
me, Giles."

     "I...," Willow chopped herself off.

     Giles looked away from Buffy. He was startled, and worried, by the
tension in Willow's shoulders and the pallor of her face.

     "I had a nightmare that night," Willow confessed, "But I haven't had
one since."

     "Willow," Giles asked gently, "What do you remember?"

     "Not much, really," Willow's voice was barely above a whisper, "Just a
few bits and pieces. Locking Buffy and Xander in a closet, going down to
the basement, digging. And....and....did I really tell someone to kill you,
Buffy?"

end part 1a


Noel:"Disappointment doesn't kill."
Abby:"Right. Rejection kills. Disappointment only maims."
          -- "The Truth About Cats and Dogs"

An optimist sees the glass half full
A pessimist sees the glass half empty
And a realist understands that soon he's going to have to wash the glass

In a world of shit you hold your nose and swim.

Don't worry about the bullet with your name on it, worry about the one
addressed "to whom it may concern".


     @-}-}--          tj thwaites          @-}-}--
     @-}-}--       tthwaite@banff.net      @-}-}--
     @-}-}--  Box 2890, Banff, AB, T0L 0C0 @-}-}--






-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: tthwaite@banff.net (tj thwaites)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Full Disclosure (2a/3) by tj thwaites
Date: 14 Oct 1998 19:02:12 -0600


Title: Full Disclosure (2/3)
Author: tj thwaites
E-mail: tthwaite@banff.net
Archive: Anya's of course. The mailing list archives, okay. All others
please ask. I'll give you the go ahead, but I just like to know where my
stories are going.
Rating: PG-13, some violence but no worse than an episode.
Spoilers: up to Bad Eggs
Summary: In the aftermath of the incident with the Bazoar, Joyce is having
nightmares. And things are about to get worse.
Disclaimer: The characters we all know and love from BtVS belong to the
Great God Joss. I'm just playing in his back yard for a bit. Also, you'll
probably recognize the stuff from various episodes in the flashback scenes.
(muchos gracias to AleXander for his wonderful work on the Transcripts
available on the Slayerfanfic Archive)
Feedback: Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated at
tthwaite@banff.net. I'll even read flames, but don't expect a reply to
combustable messages.

Now, on with the show---

     Full Disclosure
     by tj thwaites
     (aka tj the dyslexic ferret)

     =====

     Angel kept to the shadows as he silently patrolled the night streets
of Sunnydale, following Buffy's usual route. He didn't really mind hunting
in her stead while she was grounded. But sometimes he felt a little
uncomfortable doing it. Even if his targets were vampires and not humans,
the thrill of the chase appealed too strongly to the demon he constantly
fought to control.

     His head snapped up and his game face slid into place momentarily. The
faint breeze carried a familiar scent; one that would be undetectable to a
human. The bloodlust pheromone markers of a hunting vampire. Angel
quickened his pace slightly. He was getting closer. And even if this chase
ended with the dust of a staked vampire, a successful conclusion would help
appease the demon in him.

     =====

     The Gallery- 8:15 pm

     Joyce Summers wearily locked the front door, glad this day was almost
over. The unexpected arrival this afternoon of several new pieces for the
Gallery had complicated her day far more than she'd realized. Updating the
inventory list and trying to plan arrangements to show the new pieces had
taken her a little longer than she'd allowed for. And her arms and
shoulders ached from the shuffling and maneuvering she'd been doing since
closing at six.

     All Joyce wanted right now was to get home and fall into a nice, hot bath.

     Head down, her hand fishing in her purse for the keys to her Jeep,
Joyce walked to the parking lot beside the Gallery. The hand grabbing her
roughly as she passed the edge of the building came as a rude shock. Her
assailant jolted her into the shadow of a dumpster along the side wall of
the building and shoved her violently against the cinder blocks.

     Joyce screamed, her eyes relaying to her terrified mind the grotesque,
distorted face of her attacker as his hand locked around her throat.

     "Hardly enough to share," growled a voice from a second thug emerging
from the shadows, "Couldn't you have found a meal that wasn't so skinny?"

     "We can always go looking for seconds," Joyce's attacker replied, "The
night has just begun."

     Joyce struggled feebly, both hands desperately trying to peel away the
hand holding her throat in a vise-like grip. Her heart pounded in her
chest, her lungs burned as the choke hold cut off her breathing. Her vision
started greying out, stars appearing in her narrowing field of view.

     A faint roar penetrated to her fading consciousness and the hand at
her throat disappeared. Joyce fell to her knees, gasping. Her chest
heaving, great ragged breaths sucked desperately into her lungs, Joyce was
only faintly aware of the sounds of a violent fight going on just a few
feet away.

     "Here!" a vaguely familiar voice commanded, thrusting a long pointed
piece of wood into her hands.

     Joyce looked up as her rescuer was tackled by one of her assailants,
the two men rolling into parking lot. She jumped to her feet with a small
shriek at the appearance of a dirty, worn pair of boots. Her back against
the wall, she held the stake in front of her, its point the only available
weapon at the moment. The man wearing the boots advanced, seemingly
unconcerned by the point now only inches from the center of his chest. She
turned her head frantically, looking for an escape route. Over the shoulder
of the man in front of her, Joyce saw her rescuer launch a spinning kick at
the other thug, sending him reeling into the first one.

     The impact was hard enough to impale both men on the stake in her
hands, crushing Joyce against the wall briefly. Both men suddenly vanished
in a cloud of dust. Joyce's eyes almost bugged out of her skull in
disbelief. The stake fell from her numb hands as her arms dropped to her
sides.

     Angel paused, slightly taken aback by the sudden end to the fight. The
demon in him screamed for blood, focusing on the pounding heartbeat and the
fear radiating from the woman Angel had just saved. He fought back the urge
to kill, to feed, with some difficulty.

     [Have to remember to feed *before* I go patrolling for Buffy,] he
thought, [Or one of these nights I might get carried away.]

     As Angel regained his control, his human face reasserting itself, he
finally looked at the now-dusted vampires' intended meal. He barely managed
to keep his jaw from hitting the pavement in surprise. The Fates must be
indulging a really twisted sense of humour tonight.

     "Are you okay?" Angel asked Joyce quietly.

      The question rattled around in her mind for several seconds before
its meaning penetrated her shock. Joyce lifted wide eyes from the pile of
dust slowly settling onto the ground at her feet. The face of her rescuer
was familiar.

     "Come on," Angel said gently, "Let's get you home. I'll drive."

     Angel quickly retrieved Joyce's fallen purse and keys. He guided her
to her Jeep and settled her into the passenger seat. He crossed around to
the driver's side and climbed in.

     "You're Buffy's friend," Joyce said as he started the engine, "Angel,
isn't it?"

     "Uh hunh," he replied, putting the Jeep in gear and driving into the
street.

     Silence descended as Joyce's shocked mind tried to come to grips with
the attack. Angel glanced at her pale face a few times as he drove to
Revello Drive, grateful that she didn't ask any more questions.

     [Damn!] he thought, [This is a Hell of a mess. Explanations are going
to be tough. And Buffy'll probably go postal when she finds out her mother
was attacked. Again.]

     =====

     Buffy's room

     "...When I killed the Mother Bazoar, all the hatchlings must have died
as well," Buffy said, pacing around her room, "By the time I climbed back
out of the hole in the floor, everybody was passed out on the floor. And
all the little wigglers must have just let you go and you all collapsed.
Giles came up with the 'gas leak' story. Not bad for the spur of the
moment, but if anybody starts really remembering stuff...."

     Willow lay on Buffy's bed, listening as the Slayer went over the same
ground again. Willow was sympathetic to Buffy's worries over her mother's
nightmares, but this was the fourth or fifth time Buffy had gotten herself
wound up since the two girls had arrived at Buffy's house. And again,
Willow tried to deflect Buffy's train of thought before she made herself so
tense she started bouncing off the walls.

     "I think the girls will probably pass it off as just bad dreams,"
Willow offered, "After all, they said they only had a couple and that they
couldn't really remember what they were about."

     "But what about my Mom?" Buffy asked, still worried, "What if her
nightmares keep coming? What am I going to tell her if we have to try and
explain what really happened?"

     "Maybe we won't have to," Willow suggested, "All the girls stopped
having them. Maybe Giles is right, she's just having a stronger reaction
because she's the only one who's a Mom."

     "I hope so, Will," Buffy said, "I really do. But I'm still worried."

     Buffy's pacing led her back to her window. She glanced out just as the
headlights of her mother's car turned into the driveway.

     "She's home. Will, I..." Buffy chopped herself off as she saw her
mother climb out of the *passenger* side. Her jaw dropped when Angel got
out of the driver's side.

     She didn't have time to wonder why Angel had driven her mother home.
Three vampires rushed from the bushes. Buffy flipped open her trunk of
Slayer supplies that sat under the window, quickly grabbed a pair of stakes
and launched herself out the window onto the porch roof.

     Willow hurried from her position on Buffy's bed to the window. She saw
Buffy leap from the porch roof as two vampires attacked Angel and the other
went for Buffy's Mom. In the light of the streetlights, she could see the
third vampire's face. Lyle Gorch. Willow grabbed a weapon from Buffy's
trunk and ran to the stairs.

     =====

     "Well now, little lady," Lyle Gorch sneered from behind Joyce, one arm
wrapped around her throat, "I changed my mind. It's not over just yet."

     Joyce stared at her daughter in disbelief. She'd seen, but couldn't
accept, Buffy's leap off the porch roof. That had to be at least a fifteen
foot drop, and Buffy had landed with a cat-like grace on the concrete walk.
Barefoot. Joyce's eyes widened further when she saw the stakes Buffy held
in each hand.

     "Let her go!" Buffy commanded, stalking determinedly toward Lyle and
her mother. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Angel holding his
own against both of the other vamps. He looked like he was okay for now and
she could concentrate on dealing with the remaining Gorch brother.

     "Time for a little payback, Slayer," Lyle snarled, "You got my brother
killed."

     "If you two lame-brains hadn't come after me in the first place,"
Buffy retorted, "He wouldn't have gotten eaten by the Bazoar. So don't
blame your stupidity on me. If you don't let my mother go right this second
and get your sorry ass out of town, you are going to be *so* staked."

     "Bring it on," Lyle growled, suddenly shoving Joyce, spinning her up
against the side of the Jeep and leaping after Buffy.

     Buffy, abandoning her usual pummel-them-stupid-first routine, met his
attack with a flashing right, plunging the stake directly toward his heart.
Her aim was knocked off target when one of Angel's attackers was sent
crashing into her. The stake rammed into Lyle's stomach instead. He rolled
sideways away from her left handed swipe, hissing in pain. Buffy kicked,
catching the other vamp in the chin. Stunned, the vamp was an easy target.

     Buffy turned from the cloud of dust to face Lyle again. Behind him,
she could see Angel and the last vampire rolling together on the ground,
neither able to gain an advantage. The brief distraction this caused
allowed Lyle to pull the stake from his belly and renew his attack. Buffy
saw stars from the haymaker he landed on her jaw. She staggered back a few
steps before regaining her balance.

     She met Lyle's predictable pursuit with a forceful kick, robbed of
some of its effect by the fact that she was barefoot. But it was still
enough to double him over, even without the benefit of a solid bootheel.
Her right uppercut practically lifted him off his feet, sending him
staggering. Buffy quickly stepped forward while he was still off-balance,
her left hand rocketing out to bury her other stake in his chest.

     Lyle Gorch vanished in an explosion of dust.

     The snarling growls focused Buffy's attention on the last vampire,
locked in a close struggle with Angel in the center of the front lawn. They
stood practically toe to toe, both punching viciously. Neither one seemed
the least concerned with any sort of defense, they were totally focused on
the attack.

     "Angel!" Willow shouted from the front doorway, "*DUCK*!"

     Angel immediately dropped to the ground.

     THWANG!!

     Willow's aim with the crossbow was right on target and the last
vampire dusted as the bolt thudded into his chest. Angel leapt to his feet,
quickly scanning the area for any more vampires. Unfortunately, his game
face was all too visible  in the light of the streetlamps. Joyce fainted.

     "Mom!" Buffy cried, rushing to her side.

     Willow and Angel quickly joined her.

     "I think she just fainted," Willow concluded after a brief examination.

     "I'll get her inside," Angel offered, gently lifting Joyce in his arms
and carrying her to the house.

     He set her down gently on the living room couch while Willow went to
the kitchen to get a glass of water.

end part 2a


Noel:"Disappointment doesn't kill."
Abby:"Right. Rejection kills. Disappointment only maims."
          -- "The Truth About Cats and Dogs"

An optimist sees the glass half full
A pessimist sees the glass half empty
And a realist understands that soon he's going to have to wash the glass

In a world of shit you hold your nose and swim.

Don't worry about the bullet with your name on it, worry about the one
addressed "to whom it may concern".


     @-}-}--          tj thwaites          @-}-}--
     @-}-}--       tthwaite@banff.net      @-}-}--
     @-}-}--  Box 2890, Banff, AB, T0L 0C0 @-}-}--






-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: tthwaite@banff.net (tj thwaites)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Full Disclosure (1b/3) by tj thwaites
Date: 14 Oct 1998 19:01:57 -0600


 "That wasn't you," Buffy hastened to reassure her best friend, "It was
that thing controlling you. But, if you do remember bits, I wonder how many
others do? And what about the gas leak cover story? Will it hold up?"

     "I think we should make some discrete inquiries to discover if anyone
does remember anything," Giles suggested, "Why don't you two find Xander,
and possibly Cordelia, and ask around. I'll consult my books to see if I
can find anything relating to the incident. We'll meet here again after
school ends?"

     "Yeah," Buffy agreed, "I have to be here anyway. I'm still grounded
and Mom wants me to stay here, doing my homework until she comes to pick me
up on her way home from the Gallery."

     Buffy and Willow headed out of the library to search for Xander, while
Giles headed up into the stacks. He turned at the top of the stairs to
watch the two girls leave the library, doubtful that he would find any
positive information about this development. The information available on
the Bazoar was limited.

     =====

     The rest of the school was fast becoming deserted since the final bell
rang twenty minutes ago, but the library was nearly as crowded as it ever
got. Buffy and Willow sat on one side of the center table wearing matching
expressions of concern and unease. Xander and Cordelia sat on the other
side, for once not exchanging charged insults with each other.

     Giles paced relentlessly around the table, absently chewing on one
earpiece of his glasses.

     "So," he summarized, "It appears that certain people involved last
week have had nightmares about it."

     "Yeah," Willow confirmed, "Megan, Sharon and Debbie all admitted they
had a few. But not in the past few days."

     "And Jennifer and Diane might have," Buffy added, "But all they would
cop to was 'having trouble sleeping'. I'm willing to bet it's because of
nightmares even if they won't admit it."

     "This is *so* typical," Cordelia huffed, "Your weird world rears its
ugly head again and *other* girls are having nightmares, while you go on as
always."

     "Give it a rest, Cordy," Xander practically snarled, "I'm surprised
you have any concern at all. It's not like you have any maternal instincts
to appease."

     "Wait a moment," Giles said, cutting off Cordelia's undoubtably
indignant response, "Everyone who's had nightmares is female?"

     Buffy and Willow sat up straighter in their chairs, exchanging a
glance. They hadn't noticed that earlier.

     "You're right, Giles," Buffy remarked, "They've all been girls. There
has to be some reason for it."

     "Definitely a possibility," Giles confirmed, "And Xander's admittedly
snide remark about maternal instincts may offer a clue as to why your
mother seems to have been affected so badly. She was the only woman of the
adults co-opted."

     "But why would only girls be remembering anything?" Willow asked.

     "The information available on the Bazoar is limited, but states
definitively that the hatchlings take over a host by neural clamping. It's
possible that the neuro-physiological differences between the sexes may
account for the discrepancy," Giles hypothesized.

     "Neuro-what?" Xander asked.

     The ringing of the library's phone interrupted any further
explanations. Giles crossed over to the checkout desk to answer it.

     "Library. Rupert Giles speaking......Hello, Mrs Summers.....Yes, she's
here. One moment."

     Giles wordlessly held the receiver out for Buffy, who was already
halfway to him after hearing the it was her mother.

     "What's up, Mom?" Buffy said into the phone.

     "Buffy," her mother's voice replied, "Something's come up. The
Gallery's just received a shipment a few days early. It looks like I'm
going to be stuck here late tonight."

     "How late?"

     "I'll probably be here 'til eight, at least," Joyce explained, "So I
want you to go straight home. Are you okay with getting your own dinner?"

     "Sure, Mom," Buffy confirmed, "I'm sure I can find something in the
fridge to munch on. But, can Willow come over? We've got a major trig test
coming up in a few days and I could use some study help."

     "All right," Joyce allowed, "As long as you two actually *do* some
studying. Don't spend all your time discussing things I probably don't want
to hear about."

     "I promise, Mom," Buffy vowed, "Boys, clothes, and gossip will not
overwhelm the fascinating world of incomprehensible mathematics. Much."

     "I'll be checking when I get home that you at least have your homework
finished," Joyce threatened.

     "All right. All right," Buffy laughed, "We'll do our homework first.
Boy, sometimes you can be a real slavedriver. You know that?"

     "Sometimes I feel like I *need* a whip and a chair with you," Joyce
sighed, "Now remember, straight home, and you're not to leave the house
once you get there."

     "I know, I know," Buffy said, "I'm still grounded. And I can deal.
I'll see you tonight, Mom. Bye."

     "Bye, sweetheart," Joyce added.

     Buffy hung up the phone and turned back to the interrupted discussion,
changing gears rapidly.

     "So, Giles," she began, "You were saying? Why is the whole deal with
the Bazoar still affecting my Mom?"

     Giles blinked; surprised once again with the speed at which Buffy
switched between the teenager and the Slayer.

     "And in English this time, G-man," Xander interjected.

     "Hmm? Oh, yes. Well, there is medical evidence that the physical
structure of the brain differs between males and females. Perhaps those
differences are responsible for some of the girls, and your mother, being
able to remember portions of that night. I am encouraged by your reports
that the other girls' nightmares have stopped. Hopefully, your mother's
will, too."

     "But why is she still having them if they stopped with the others?"
Buffy asked.

     "That's where those 'maternal instincts' that Xander mentioned so
disparagingly may play a part," Giles explained, "Your mother was the only
one affected who was...well, a mother. I suspect that the nightmares may be
more severe for her because she has a child of her own she cares for very
much. She did, after all, hit Spike over the head with an axe to protect
you. From that incident alone, I'd say her maternal instincts are very
highly developed."

     "Then I guess you don't remember her nearly bashing my head in with a
pick down in the basement that night," Buffy retorted hotly, "That thing
had total control of her."

     "That may be why your mother is having a harder time dealing with the
incident," Giles explained, "The Bazoar was probably able to gain a deeper
control of her since she has a child of her own. It would have been able to
harness her protective instincts, we've already seen that she is willing to
put herself to great risk for you, Buffy, and pervert them to protecting
its own offspring."

     "And this means?" Buffy pressed.

     "It just may take a little longer for her to recover from the incident
than the other girls," Giles offered.

     "But why do only some of the girls remember?" Cordelia interjected, "I
don't remember anything."

     "I'm afraid I don't have any explanation," Giles said quietly, "I'm
not up on the current biological theories of the differences between the
sexes and the brain."

     "Estrogen levels," Willow spoke up suddenly.

     The others stared at her. Willow blushed slightly, but reached out and
turned her computer on. She called up the project she'd been working on at
lunch and quickly paged through her research notes. Finally finding what
she was looking for, she gestured for the others to look.

     "There are studies being done to find out just what kinds of
differences there are," she began, "There have been indications that guys
do better at some specific spatial tasks, but girls seem to do better at
some language and memory things. But the part that might explain the
nightmare thing is a couple of studies that show that different hormone
levels seem to have an effect, too. The same test subjects got different
scores on the same kind of test at different times during their cycles,
scoring better during the low estrogen level part."

     "In English, please, Will," Xander begged, "You know I nearly flunked
bio last year."

     "I hadn't considered that angle," Giles mused, "So there is evidence
that the different hormone levels at various stages of the menstrual cycle
can have an effect on memory?"

     "Menstru....." Xander muttered, "Ick, I don't think I want to
understand this part."

     "Well, the studies are fairly new," Willow explained, "And they aren't
certain how significant the connection is, but there does seem to be one."

     "So? What?" Cordelia asked, "All the girls who can remember anything
are only doing it as a side effect of PMS?"

     "In a manner of speaking," Giles said, "While these studies Willow
refers to note only a tenuous connection, the mystical influence of the
Hellmouth may be amplifying that connection in this case. That would also
explain why only a few of you do remember anything, the difference in
timing, as it were."

     "Okay," Buffy added, "Let me get this straight, some of the girls
remember bits because they happened to have the right levels of whatever
hormone on that night. And my Mom just happens to have been one of the
lucky few, right?"

     "I believe that may be the case," Giles confirmed, "Fortunately, the
nightmares seemed to have faded away for the other girls. Hopefully, your
mother's will also."

     "But what if she keeps having them, Giles?" Buffy insisted, "What if
they get worse? What if she *does* start to remember?"

     "I'm not sure," Giles hesitated, glancing at Willow.

     "What?" Willow asked, "Why are you looking at me?"

     "You say you had only the one nightmare?" Giles questioned.

     "Well, yeah," Willow replied, "But I don't see the connection."

     "If you haven't had any since Buffy and Xander explained things, then
perhaps...." Giles trailed off.

     "We might have to tell my Mom the truth in order to stop hers," Buffy
finished for him, "That could be a dicey thing, Giles. She might not
believe us. And even if she does, how do we explain how we found out about
it?"

     "This is not good," Willow muttered.

     "I'm sure we'll be able to think of something," Giles offered, "It
might not come to that. You did say that the other girls' nightmares have
stopped. There's no reason not to assume you mother's won't, as well."

     "I guess," Buffy conceded, "But I'm still not happy with this whole
sitch. C'mon Will, let's get going to my house. We'll stop at the store on
the way. If I'm going to have to attempt to wrap my brain around trig, I'm
going to need some quality munchies to fuel the effort."

     "Food?" Xander chimed in.

     "Down, boy," Buffy chuckled, "The Walking Stomach isn't invited to
this one, sorry."

     "So I have to fend for myself. Again," Xander griped, "You know I hate
math. How am I supposed to deal without The Great Brain to help? And Mother
Hubbard has a feast compared to the my kitchen's prospects."

     "I can come by later, Xander," Willow offered, gathering her knapsack
and joining Buffy at the door, "Okay?"

     "Great, Will," Xander smiled.

     After Willow and Buffy had left, Cordelia leaned over and whispered to
Xander.

     "So, no one's home at your place?"

     Xander nodded to her, not quite following her train of thought.

     "You must have a couch that's more comfortable than the utility
closet," she added, sotto voce.

     The light clicked in Xander's mind. He smiled broadly.

     "Let's go," he said, standing.

     Giles was dragged out of his introspection of nightmares by the
library door closing behind the departing teens. With a small shrug, he
turned toward his office. There was a cup of tea calling his name.

     =====

END PART 1


Noel:"Disappointment doesn't kill."
Abby:"Right. Rejection kills. Disappointment only maims."
          -- "The Truth About Cats and Dogs"

An optimist sees the glass half full
A pessimist sees the glass half empty
And a realist understands that soon he's going to have to wash the glass

In a world of shit you hold your nose and swim.

Don't worry about the bullet with your name on it, worry about the one
addressed "to whom it may concern".


     @-}-}--          tj thwaites          @-}-}--
     @-}-}--       tthwaite@banff.net      @-}-}--
     @-}-}--  Box 2890, Banff, AB, T0L 0C0 @-}-}--






-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: tthwaite@banff.net (tj thwaites)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Full Disclosure (2b/3) by tj thwaites
Date: 14 Oct 1998 19:02:25 -0600

     =====

     Consciousness slowly began to return to Joyce Summers. Mostly. The
parts of her mind devoted to reason and logical explanations locked
themselves behind a wall of denial, leaving the rest of her mind to process
the evening's events on its own. Her ears reported hushed voices in an
argument nearby.

     "....Can't believe you let her see your game face, Angel," Buffy's
voice accused, "That was incredibly sloppy."

     "Heat of the battle," Angel said, "I didn't mean to. Sorry."

     "Well, that's just great," Buffy groused.

     "Buffy," Willow worried, "What are we going to do now? I mean, she
*saw* you stake those vampires. And them turning to dust. What are
we.....okay, what are *you* going to tell her?"

     "She staked a couple herself earlier," Angel interjected, "Outside the
Gallery. That's why I was giving her a drive home. She was too shocked to
be behind the wheel."

     "What?!?" Buffy shouted, quickly lowering her voice at Willow's
shushing gesture, "What happened at the Gallery, Angel?"

     Angel briefly recounted the events in the Gallery's parking lot.

     "From the look on her face after," he concluded, "I though it best
that she didn't drive, so I brought her home. Those vampires would have
been bad enough without the instant replay on the lawn."

     "So what do we do now?" Willow asked.

     "I don't know," Buffy replied hesitantly, looking back around the edge
of the opening into the living room, "I think I might just have to tell her
everything, now. Damn! This is *so* not cool. I never wanted her
involved....."

     The argument trailed off as the voices faded, moving further into the
hall. Memories surfaced in Joyce's mind. Certain baffling episodes in the
past now starting to make a weird sort of sense.

     Buffy's odd behaviour that morning last spring during Cheerleader tryouts:

     /// Buffy entered the kitchen wearing her cheerleader outfit, bouncing
and singing.

     "Macho, macho, man! I want to be a macho man. Macho....Oh, hey,
juice!" Buffy cut her serenade off, grabbing the glass and chugging down
the juice, "Mmmm. Quality juice. Not from concentrate."

    Joyce glanced up from slicing another orange.

     "You're in a good mood," she remarked, placing another glass under the
juicer's spout.

     "I am," Buffy replied, "I'm on the squad, which is great 'cause I feel
like cheering. And leading others to cheer. Oooo, hey, juice!"

     Buffy grabbed the second glass and drank it quickly.

     Joyce wondered a moment about her daughter's unusual morning cheer.

     "Listen, honey, about yesterday. I really..." Joyce trailed off, not
quite sure what she wanted to say.

     "Mmm! That is totally yester," Buffy quipped, "Besides, it's not like
you were wrong, y'know. I did get kicked outta school. I'm just wacky that
way!"

     "Still," Joyce said, unsure if Buffy really understood, "I just want
you to know that, despite the problems you've had, I really..."

     Buffy cut her off, "Mom, you just don't get it. And believe me, you
don't want it. Y'know, there are just some things about being a Vampire
Slayer that the older generation..."

     "A *what*?" Joyce interrupted.

     "It's a......long story," Buffy prevaricated./////

     "Vampire Slayer?" Joyce's confused mind wondered briefly before
another memory surfaced.

     Parent Teacher Night:

     ////Joyce watched as Buffy grabbed the principal as he tried to force
open a window.

     "You can't go outside," Buffy insisted, "They'll kill you!"

     "You don't tell me," Snyder retorted, practically snarling, "*I* tell
*you*!"

     Buffy hauled Snyder down from the chair, away from the window.

     "They will kill everybody in this room," she persisted, deadly
serious, "Nobody goes out, nobody comes in until *I* say so. Do you hear
me?"

     "Who do you think you are?" Snyder did snarl this time. And he wasn't
the only one surprised by Buffy's forceful tone of voice.

     "I'm the one that knows how to stop them," Buffy replied, not backing
down an inch.///

     ///Later that evening, the people gathered in the science room stood
away from the door as one of the 'gang' members tried to chop through it
with an axe. He already had a hole made in the center of the door.
Suddenly, there was a loud crash from the hallway. Joyce closed on the door
and peered through the hole.

     She couldn't see much through the small opening. But she did see a
small, delicate hand raised, clutching a wooden stake. The hand plunged
downward. Then Buffy's face suddenly appeared.////

     Then there was that bit at the mall last week:

     ///"Let me guess," Joyce said, a little annoyed with Buffy for
forgetting about the dress, "You were distracted by a boy."

     "Technically," Buffy replied, fiddling with her hands and not meeting
her mother's eyes.

     "A little responsibility is all I ask. Honestly, don't you think about
anything besides clothes and boys?" Joyce demanded, exasperated.

     "Saving the world from vampires?" Buffy answered.///

     Joyce slowly opened her eyes and sat up. Her rational mind was still
refusing to accept what the rest of it was trying to tell her. And the all
too vivid memories of tonight's experiences.

     [Vampires?] she thought, [It's not possible. There can't be real
vampires, can there?]

     =====

     In the hall, Buffy came to a decision.

     "I'm calling Giles," she told Angel and Willow, "Get him to come over
and bring that book on the Bazoar. Maybe something Watchery, too. I think
it's time my Mom found out the truth."

     "The Bazoar?" Willow asked.

     "Yeah," Buffy replied, "What happened tonight is probably cause enough
for nightmares, I don't want her having to deal with vague memories of the
Bazoar, too. You said you haven't had one since Xander and I explained
everything. Maybe Mom will stop having hers if we just tell her the truth
about last week."

     "Are you sure about this, Buffy?" Angel asked, "Telling her the
*whole* truth."

     "There is that," Buffy conceded, "I suppose we could leave out some of
our past adventures. And Robot Ted is definitely off limits, Will. Let's
just stick to the basics. It's bad enough that I'll have to tell her all
about being the Slayer, I don't know how to explain that my boyfriend is a
vampire on top of everything else. Especially since Giles will probably hit
the 'vampires-are-demons-creatures-of- pure-evil' note fairly hard."

     "We could always use Cordelia's line," Willow offered.

     "Hunh?" Buffy wondered.

     "You remember," Willow said, "Halloween, when you told her he was one
and she didn't really believe it at first. I know she was being sarcastic
when she said it, but she was kind of right, wasn't she?"

     "What are you talking about?" Angel asked.

     "Oh, right, Will. I'd forgotten that," Buffy added, "The 'kind of like
a Care Bear with fangs' line."

     "What?" Angel demanded, confused.

     "You explain it to him, Will," Buffy instructed, "I have to call
Giles. Now"

     "Well, you see...."

     Buffy tuned out Willow's explanation to Angel. She picked up the phone
and dialed Giles' number, again checking on her mother around the edge of
the wall. Her eyes were still closed and she appeared to be resting
comfortably. But Buffy was worried. Well, more like totally freaked by
tonight's unwelcome complications.

     [Giles is *so* not gonna like this,] Buffy thought as she waited for
him to answer.

     "Hello?" Giles' voice finally came over the line.

     "Giles?" Buffy began, "We have a situation. I need you to come over to
my house right now. And I need you to bring that book with the stuff on the
Bazoar. Bring something Watchery, too."

     "Buffy, what's going on?" Giles wanted to know.

     "It's confession time, Giles," Buffy explained, "We've had a couple of
close encounters of the undead kind. One at the Gallery and one here at my
house, on the front lawn. My Mom saw it all. And there's no way to explain
it away. I'm gonna have to come clean this time, Giles. The truth. All of
it."

     "You're quite certain, Buffy?"

     "Yeah, Giles. I'm certain. How soon can you get here? You're better in
the explanation department than I am."

     "I'm on my way."

     Buffy hung up the phone and turned back to Willow and Angel. From the
disgust and amusement warring for dominance on his face, Buffy guessed that
Willow had had to explain what a Care Bear *was*, too.

     [We really have to bring Angel up to date on a few things,] Buffy
thought, hiding a smile, [Maybe I should suggest he invest in cable. Give
him something to do during the day. Or, maybe not. I don't know if I could
handle a soaps-addicted vamp boyfriend, the vamp part is tough enough as it
is.]

     The weak groan from the front room announced Joyce's return to full
consciousness. Or a reasonable facsimile thereof.

     "Will, call Xander," Buffy said over her shoulder as she hurried to
the living room, "I may need someone who can remember the whole story to
back me up when we tell my Mom about the Bazoar. I just hope she doesn't
totally wig."

     =====

     Xander's hormones were having the time of their lives. He was lying on
the couch in his living room, with a very sexy girl lying on top of him.
They were seemingly fused at the lips. And it wasn't a dream. Life was
definitely very good right this moment.

     The phone rang.

     Xander reluctantly removed one hand from Cordelia's hair and reached
blindly for the phone on the end table as it rang again. It took several
tries before his hand hit the receiver. He had to take a few deep breaths
before getting enough air to answer.

     "Hello," Xander said, still somewhat out of breath.

     "Xander?"

     Xander would have jerked upright at recognizing Willow's voice if he
hadn't had Cordelia draped over his chest. He didn't get a chance to reply.
Cordelia suddenly snatched the phone from his hand.

     "I'm sorry," she spoke into the receiver, "You'll have to call back
later, Xander's kinda busy right now."

     Laughing, she reached out and hung up the phone.

     "Next time, turn on the machine, okay?" she told Xander, "Now, where
were we?"

     She leaned in to resume kissing, but Xander put his hand on her
shoulder. She was surprised by the worried expression on his face.

     "Um, Cordy?" he mumbled, "I think that was Willow. On the phone."

     "WHAT?!?" Cordelia practically shouted, "Why would Willow be calling you?"

     "She was going to come over and help me with math after Buffy's Mom
got home, remember?" Xander said, "But that wasn't supposed to be until
after eight, at least."

     Xander looked up, across the remains of the pizza and sodas lying on
the coffee table, at the TV. The snow on the screen indicated that the
movie they hadn't been watching had ended, and the clock on the VCR read
8:53.

     "It's almost *nine* o'clock?" Cordelia squeaked, "I was supposed to be
home at eight. My Mom wanted to talk about something. I have to go. Now."

     Cordelia jumped off Xander and headed for the door, grabbing her car
keys from the hall table. She turned briefly when she reached the front
door.

     "Bye, Xander. See you tomorrow."

     Then she was gone.

     Xander's mind needed a few seconds to catch up. The sudden shift from
groping on the couch to solitude left him spinning. And the memory of
Willow's voice on the phone didn't help. His eyes kept returning to the
phone as he began to clean up the debris from the pizza. Whatever Willow
had wanted, she'd call back if it was important.

     =====

END PART 2


Noel:"Disappointment doesn't kill."
Abby:"Right. Rejection kills. Disappointment only maims."
          -- "The Truth About Cats and Dogs"

An optimist sees the glass half full
A pessimist sees the glass half empty
And a realist understands that soon he's going to have to wash the glass

In a world of shit you hold your nose and swim.

Don't worry about the bullet with your name on it, worry about the one
addressed "to whom it may concern".


     @-}-}--          tj thwaites          @-}-}--
     @-}-}--       tthwaite@banff.net      @-}-}--
     @-}-}--  Box 2890, Banff, AB, T0L 0C0 @-}-}--






-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: tthwaite@banff.net (tj thwaites)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Full Disclosure (3a/3) by tj thwaites
Date: 14 Oct 1998 19:02:37 -0600


Title: Full Disclosure (3/3)
Author: tj thwaites
E-mail: tthwaite@banff.net
Archive: Anya's of course. The mailing list archives, okay. All others
please ask. I'll give you the go ahead, but I just like to know where my
stories are going.
Rating: PG-13, some violence but no worse than an episode.
Spoilers: up to Bad Eggs
Summary: In the aftermath of the incident with the Bazoar, Joyce is having
nightmares. And things are about to get worse.
Disclaimer: The characters we all know and love from BtVS belong to the
Great God Joss. I'm just playing in his back yard for a bit. Also, you'll
probably recognize the stuff from various episodes in the explanation
phase. (muchos gracias to AleXander for his wonderful work on the
Transcripts available on the Slayerfanfic Archive)
Feedback: Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated at
tthwaite@banff.net. I'll even read flames, but don't expect a reply to
combustable messages.

Now, on with the show---

     Full Disclosure
     by tj thwaites
     (aka tj the dyslexic ferret)

     =====

     Buffy re-entered the living room to find her mother sitting up on the
couch. Extremely pale. Joyce hugged herself, staring down into her lap,
still trying to grapple with the possibility that vampires might actually
exist. And the more alarming revelation that Buffy (and from the looks of
things, Willow and maybe others, also) *knew* about it. And had known for
some time.

     "Mom?" Buffy asked hesitantly as she stepped up to the couch.

     Joyce suddenly couldn't sit still. She rose and began to pace
nervously. Trying to rub away the goosebumps on her arms, Joyce finally
noticed a fine coating of some kind of grit on her arms, blouse and skirt.

     "What...?" she murmured, brushing at the grit. A small puff of dust
rose from her clothing and hung in the still air of the living room.

     "Vamp dust from earlier?" Buffy asked Angel, who stood leaning against
the edge of the wall separating the hall and the living room.

     "I think so," he replied.

     "Vamp....dust," Joyce stammered, her voice quavering,
"From....earlier....those things....on *me*?"

     Buffy stood motionless, undecided on how to proceed, as her mother
stared down at herself. Joyce's breathing speeded up. Suddenly, Joyce
bolted for the hallway.

     "I have to shower," she added, rushing to the stairs.

     Buffy followed her to the hallway. Angel stayed where he was, keeping
his back turned because of his suspicion of what came next. And he was
right. Joyce was barely halfway up the stairs when her blouse fell from her
shoulders, landing on the steps. She disappeared down the upstairs hallway
toward the bathroom already working on her skirt's zipper.

     Buffy stood at the bottom of the stairs, her face twisted with worry.
When Angel stepped up beside her and put his arm around her shoulder, Buffy
leaned into his comforting embrace. She waited until she heard the water
come on upstairs before stepping out from Angel's arm. And noticed Willow
standing motionless by the hall table, staring at the receiver in her hand
as if it were some strange experiment gone awry.

     "Will?" Buffy asked, "Did you get through to Xander? I think we're
gonna need backup testimony for some of this."

     "Hunh?" Willow replied slowly, not quite in the here and now, "What?"

     "Willow?" Buffy prodded, "Telephone? Xander? Did you get through?"

     "Um, yeah," Willow sighed, finally hanging up the receiver.

     "Well?" Buffy prompted, "Is he coming or not?"

     "You know how we've been wondering why Cordelia and Xander have been
acting so weird this past month?" Willow asked.

     "Yeah?" Buffy replied, confused by the non sequitur.

     "I think I know what's causing it."

     "What do you mean?"

     "They're together."

     "Will, you're not making any sense."

     "Cordelia was there. *At Xander's house*!"

     "What?!?" Buffy was as shocked as Willow looked, "Are you certain?"

     "Yes," Willow whispered disconsolately, "When Xander answered the
phone, he was out of breath. Then there was *Cordelia's* voice saying 'call
back later, Xander's busy'. I think I interrupted them."

     Buffy's mouth dropped open in shock. Xander and Cordelia? Together?
*Xander* and *Cordelia*?!? There had to be some weird Hellmouth thing
behind *that*. She walked over and picked up the phone, punching the
numbers harder than necessary.

     "Hello?" Xander's voice sounded normal to Buffy's ears.

     "Xander," she replied, "It's Buffy."

     "Hey Buffster," Xander declared, "I was just going to call you. Is
Willow still there? She was going to come over and help with the math
tonight when you two got finished doing the girl thing."

     "Sorry, Xand," Buffy answered, listening closely to see if she could
hear anything incriminating in the background, "You're on your own mathwise
tonight. Something's come up here."

     "What's up, Buff?" Xander asked, "Anything I can help with?"

     "Not right now," Buffy sighed. If there was something going on between
him and Cordelia, tonight was not the time for that revelation. There was
already enough on everyone's minds. She would just have to do her best
telling her mother about the Bazoar without Xander's backup testimony.

     "It's just that....," she continued, pausing to take a deep breath,
"The Crime Club is about to induct a new member."

     "*What*?" Xander's voice took on a slightly hysterical edge, "Buffy,
what's going on? What happened? Who is it?"

     "Xander!" Buffy interrupted him before he could ask any more
questions, "My Mom found out. She was attacked by a couple of vamps outside
the Gallery. Angel rescued her. But when she got home we had a repeat
performance on the front lawn. I staked Lyle Gorch and another vamp right
in front of her. And Willow bagged the last one with my crossbow. My Mom
saw it all. Giles is on his way over right now to help me and Willow
explain things."

     "You sure you don't want me to come over?" Xander asked, his voice
betraying his unease at Buffy's revelation, "I know Giles is the Answerman
and everything, but you don't need my help?"

     "It's all right, Xander," Buffy insisted, "We can handle it. I'll see
you tomorrow."

     "If you're sure?" Xander added.

     "I'm sure, Xand. Bye."

     "Bye."

     Buffy hung up. She glanced up the stairs as she moved to join Willow
and Angel in the livingroom. An uneasy silence descended.

     =====

     After several minutes the tense quiet, broken only by the steady drone
of the shower running upstairs, began to grate on Buffy's nerves. She rose
from the couch and began to pace restlessly. Back and forth between the
foot of the stairs and the front window. Back and forth, pausing briefly at
the end of each leg to check for either the appearance of her mother or
Giles' arrival.

     "I'm gonna check on my Mom," Buffy suddenly announced, starting for
the stairs, "Keep an eye out for Giles, he should be here any second."

     Buffy ran up the stairs, not waiting for either Angel or Willow to
acknowledge her. She knocked, somewhat hesitantly, on the bathroom door.

     "Mom?"

     No answer.

     "Mom?" Buffy called again, a little louder.

     Still no reply.

     Buffy opened the door and tentatively stuck her head into the
steam-filled room.

     "Mom?" she called for the third time.

     The faint sounds of sobs brought her completely into the room and up
to the tub. Pulling aside the shower curtain, Buffy's heart leapt into her
throat. Her mother sat, huddled on the bottom of the tub in a fetal
position, shivering despite the scalding water raining down on her. Her
eyes were clenched tightly shut and her shoulders shook.

     Buffy reached out and turned off the water. She grabbed a towel from
the bar on the wall beside the shower and drew it around Joyce's shoulders.
Or, attempted to. Joyce flinched away from the slight contact with a
shriek.

     "Mom!" Buffy cried, hopping into the tub, "Mom, it's me. You're safe."

     [Whoa, deja vu,] Buffy thought as she firmly wrapped the towel around
her mother's shoulders, [Except for the wet part.]

     "I've got you, Mom," she continued soothingly, "Nothing can hurt you
here. Everything will be all right."

     Joyce slowly began to relax and allowed her daughter to help her from
the tub. She dried herself off, leaning heavily  on Buffy's shoulder. The
shock and hysteria were starting to wear off. As she let Buffy lead her to
her room for some clothes, Joyce mustered as much calm and control as
possible to face the memories of tonight's events. She was going to want
some damned good answers from Buffy and the others about all this.

     =====

     Willow nearly bolted from the couch when the doorbell rang. Finally.
The silence that had permeated the house since the water upstairs was shut
off had been practically unbearable. But Angel had gone into Silent Brood
Mode in the corner and she refused to show her anxiety by babbling.
Relieved that something was happening, Willow rushed to the door and threw
it open.

     "Giles!," she shouted, "What took you so long?"

     "I had to stop by the library," Giles explained, "For the volume with
the information on the Bazoar. Is everyone all right? No one was harmed?"

     "I think Buffy's Mom is pretty wigged," Willow told Giles as she
virtually dragged him by the sleeve into the living room, "But nobody got
hurt. This is *not* good, Giles. Mrs. Summers *saw* Buffy stake a couple of
vampires. And she saw Angel's game face."

     "She also staked a pair herself," Angel added from his position in the
shadowy corner.

     Giles stopped dead in his tracks. His mind had almost come to grips
with tonight's surprises on the way over, but Angel's revelation derailed
his train of thought again. He almost didn't even notice a pair of stakes
and Buffy's crossbow sitting openly on the coffee table when he sat down,
his mind still reeling with the implications of Joyce Summers discovering
her daughter's "hobby".

     Giles dropped the books on the table next to the crossbow and stakes.

     "Very well," he said, "I'm still a little in the dark here. Will
someone please explain what happened?"

     Willow and Angel exchanged a look before she motioned for him to start.

     =====

     Joyce and Buffy entered the living room to find a tense silence
hanging over its occupants. Joyce was surprised by the presence of the
school's librarian, Mr. Giles. Then she remembered something from last
week, when Buffy hadn't been in the library when she'd gone to pick her up.

     ///Joyce glanced down at the books lying on the top of the card catalogue.

     "'Bristol's Demon Index'?" Joyce asked, "'Hell's Offspring'?"

     "A hobby of mine," Giles replied, picking up the books and placing
them on a shelf inside the cage, "But...uh...having nothing to do with
Buffy in any way."///

     Later that night, while frantically searching for Buffy in the wake of
the gas leak, Joyce had forgotten Giles' odd comment. But now, it was
another piece to a puzzle Joyce had never even known existed. All those
times Giles had called, or come to the house, looking for Buffy because of
something going on at the library now seemed to have a sinister edge.

     [He knows,] Joyce thought, [He's known all along and kept it from me!]

     "You!!" Joyce snarled at Giles, advancing menacingly on the tweed clad
man, "How *DARE* you! How could get my daughter involved in this nonsense?"

     Willow brought her knees up to her chest on the end of the couch. Even
though this example of parental wrath wasn't aimed in her direction, Willow
made herself as small and inconspicuous as possible. She knew she could
find herself under Mrs. Summers baleful glare at any point. And she dreaded
it, knowing that it was inevitable. Mrs. Summers would undoubtably realize
that Willow was deeply involved with Buffy's secret.

     Angel stayed in his corner. He had no desire to step in. Joyce needed
to get the anger out of her system if there was any chance of getting her
to listen to the truth. Right now she seemed to be in pure overprotective
lioness mode and Giles would just have to deal with Joyce's ire. He
probably had the best shot at making her listen, anyway.

     Giles pressed himself deep into the chair. Joyce's white terrycloth
robe covering her pale blue pyjamas did nothing to lessen the fire in her
eyes or the set of her jaw. He blinked, suddenly seeing Buffy as she might
look if she survives Slaying for twenty years. Giles opened his mouth to
say something, anything, which might calm the raging Valkyrie in front of
him. But Buffy got there first.

     "Mom!" Buffy cried, grabbing Joyce's arm, "Giles didn't start
anything! Just let us explain!"

     "Buffy. Sit. Down. And. Be. Quiet," Joyce said through clenched teeth
before rounding on Giles again, "You *bastard*! Buffy's a teenager, I
expect a certain amount of rebelliousness and evasiveness from *her*. I can
still remember what it was like to be one. But *you*, you are supposed to
be an adult. Responsible. How dare you involve my daughter in your
delusions? I want some answers and I want them *now*. Just what the Hell is
going on? And when did it start?"

     "It started back in LA before I got expelled from Hemery," Buffy
stated from behind Joyce's shoulder, "And there's nothing delusional about
all this. This is the dark side of reality, Mom."

     "What?" Joyce asked, whirling on her daughter in shock.

     "It started back in LA," Buffy repeated, "All those fights. That 'bad
crowd' you always talk about. That was all about vampires. I had to burn
down the gym because it was full of vampires and that was the only way I
could stop them."

     Joyce's eyes darted from Buffy's set face around the other occupants.
They all looked deadly serious. Joyce didn't resist when Buffy took her arm
and led her to the couch. She practically collapsed onto it, shaking her
head.

end part 3a


Noel:"Disappointment doesn't kill."
Abby:"Right. Rejection kills. Disappointment only maims."
          -- "The Truth About Cats and Dogs"

An optimist sees the glass half full
A pessimist sees the glass half empty
And a realist understands that soon he's going to have to wash the glass

In a world of shit you hold your nose and swim.

Don't worry about the bullet with your name on it, worry about the one
addressed "to whom it may concern".


     @-}-}--          tj thwaites          @-}-}--
     @-}-}--       tthwaite@banff.net      @-}-}--
     @-}-}--  Box 2890, Banff, AB, T0L 0C0 @-}-}--






-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: tthwaite@banff.net (tj thwaites)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Full Disclosure (3b/3) by tj thwaites
Date: 14 Oct 1998 19:02:50 -0600

 [This is *not* happening!] the rational, logical part of her mind kept
insisting, [Vampires do not exist. Those men could not have turned to dust.
*I* must have been hallucinating. I'm having a breakdown, that's the only
explanation that makes sense.]

     "Mom, I know this is hard," Buffy said, sitting on the couch between
her mother and Willow, "But it's the truth. And I know how you're feeling,
I didn't believe it at first either. Please, Mom. You have to listen to
us."

     "What is going on?" Joyce whispered.

     "Vampires are real, Mom," Buffy stated, "And it's my destiny to fight
them. There's nothing you can change. You're just gonna have to accept it."

     "Well I *don't* accept it!" Joyce blurted, "There has to be another
explanation! This is *not* possible!"

     "Giles, help," Buffy sighed, "You do the whole explanation thing
better than me."

     "I'm afraid Buffy is essentially correct, Mrs. Summers," Giles said
quietly when Joyce looked at him, "Vampires are definitely all too real.
And Buffy is the only one capable of fighting them effectively."

     Joyce looked away from Giles. She couldn't accept the sad agreement
she saw in Buffy's eyes. Joyce looked past her daughter to the other girl
on the end of the couch. Willow looked back at Joyce's pale face and nodded
confirmation. Joyce's eyes flicked to the corner Angel had ensconced
himself in. He just looked back, his face blank. Then he nodded as well.

     "Maybe you should start at the beginning Giles," Buffy suggested,
"Give her the whole deep background thing."

     Giles cleared his throat nervously as Joyce turned to face him.

     "Yes, I suppose that's best," he sighed, then looked Joyce directly in
the eye, "This world is far older than anyone knows. Contrary to popular
mythology, it did not begin as a paradise. For untold aeons demons walked
the Earth. They made it their home, their Hell. But as time progressed,
they lost their purchase on this reality. The way was made for mortal
animals, for Man. All that remains of the old ones are vestiges, certain
magics, certain creatures..."

     "And vampires," Buffy added.

     Joyce looked from one face to another, still not wanting to believe
this. But her resistance was beginning to fade. They all seemed so sure, so
serious, despite the unbelievability of the subject matter.

     "Yes," Giles continued after sparing Buffy a reproving glance for
interrupting him, "The books tell that the last demon to leave this reality
fed off a human, mixed their blood. He became a human form possessed,
infected by the demon's soul. He bit another, and another, and so they walk
the Earth, feeding. Killing some, mixing their blood with others to make
more of their kind. Waiting for the animals to die out, and the old ones to
return."

     "But what does any of that have to do with Buffy?" Joyce asked.

     "I'm the Slayer," Buffy replied, as if that explained everything.

     "The 'Slayer'?" Joyce questioned.

     "Into each generation a Slayer is born," Giles answered, ignoring
Buffy rolling her eyes at his lecturing tone, "One girl in all the world, a
Chosen One, one born with the skill and the strength to hunt the vampires,
to stop the spread of their evil and protect the world."

     "I don't believe this!" Joyce shouted, jumping up and starting to
pace, "This *can't* be happening!"

     "Mom!" Buffy exclaimed, getting up to stand in front of her mother.
She was beginning to get desperate, wanting to make her mother see past her
denial, "It's the truth. You *saw* those vamps outside turn to dust when I
staked them. And those other ones earlier outside the Gallery when Angel
rescued you. It's all real. You have to understand it."

     "I don't know *what* I saw," Joyce retorted, her mind still clinging
to the idea that this was all some sort of horrible nightmare, "Or think I
saw. This is impossible."

     Buffy looked at Giles and Willow, at a loss. This was much harder than
she'd anticipated. Her mother was refusing to accept something that was
staring her in the face.

     [Staring her in the face?] Buffy thought suddenly, turning to Angel.

     "Angel, come here."

     Angel was at her side immediately. He looked into her eyes and took a
step back. He couldn't believe she was thinking what he thought she was
thinking. Her face hardened.

     "That is not a good idea right now, Buffy," he warned, "Your Mom's
already been through a lot tonight. Don't you think she's had enough
shocks?"

     "Angel," Buffy commanded, "Game face. Now."

     Angel sighed and looked down. He thought Buffy was pushing too hard
and too fast, but Joyce's continued refusal to believe what they were
telling her had reached a point where he accepted that it would take
something this drastic to make her see the truth. He allowed the demon to
surface, his face transforming to reveal the vampire, and raised his head
to look straight at Joyce.

     Joyce's hand flew to her mouth to try and hold back the shriek that
threatened to escape when Angel looked at her. Her eyes widened as she
forced herself to take a long look at the pronounced brow ridges, the
glowing yellow eyes, and the fangs visible through his parted lips. Giles
immediately stepped up to her side to catch her in case she fainted. He
shot a glare at Buffy, telling her wordlessly that he thought she was being
too abrupt. Joyce continued staring at the horrible visage where a handsome
young man had been standing just seconds before.

     "Buffy," Angel said quietly, rolling up his sleeve, "Your cross."

     Buffy blinked at him. She looked back at her mother's pallid face and
sighed. This was going a bit father than she'd expect to have to, but Angel
had a point. If her Mom still wasn't accepting everything, going whole hog
would be necessary. She reached up and undid the clasp of the chain around
her neck. She held out the cross. Angel nodded to her and, with a grimace,
Buffy pressed the cross against his bare arm.

     In the dead silence, the faint sizzle that started the moment the
cross touched Angel's flesh sounded very loud. Buffy pulled the cross away
quickly when a wisp of smoke began rising from Angel's arm. Angel held his
arm out, the cross shaped burn clearly visible. Giles slipped his arm
around Joyce's waist as her knees buckled. He helped her the few steps to
the couch and sat her down.

     "Oh my God," Joyce whispered, her denial finally crumbling.

     Buffy hurried to her mother's side, taking Joyce trembling hand in her own.

     "Mom," she whispered, "I'm sorry about that, but I had to make you see
that we're telling you the truth. I know this has all come at you pretty
fast. And it's a big shock. But we'll deal. God, I've wanted to tell you
this for so long, I just didn't want to put you in danger. I hated keeping
this quiet, knowing you didn't understand why I was always in so much
trouble because of what I am. And I didn't want to worry about me. I can
take care of myself."

     "Oh, Buffy," Joyce breathed, gathering her daughter into a hug, "I'll
always worry about you, you're my daughter. I know you can take care of
yourself, but a mother worries. It just is."

     Willow watched the pair on the couch for several seconds before
turning to Giles and Angel.

     "I think the worst is over," she said quietly so as not to interrupt
Buffy and her Mom, "Maybe this is the point where we should leave?"

     "You may be right, Willow," Giles acknowledged.

     "Wait," Joyce said as they turned toward the door, "There's still
something I want to know."

     Everyone looked at her expectantly. Angel began to feel uncomfortable
when her gaze settled on him.

     "If you're a vampire," Joyce asked, her voice a little unsteady, "Does
that mean you drink blood? Feed on people?"

     "I used to," Angel replied, cutting off Buffy as she opened her mouth,
"But not for a long time."

     "Angel's a special case," Buffy added.

     "He has a soul," Willow confirmed.

     "What?" Joyce said, confused.

     "I'll explain," Angel sighed, motioning for Willow and Buffy to let
him speak, "When you become a vampire, the demon gets your body. But not
your soul, that's gone. After I turned, I.... wreaked havoc for a long
time. No guilt. No remorse. Then, I fed on a Gypsy girl. Her people reacted
by punishing me with the worst thing they could come up with. They cursed
me. Brought back my soul. You can't begin to imagine what it's like to have
done the things I've done and still care. I haven't fed off a living human
since that day."

     "Now he helps us out with the Slayage," Buffy added, "He brings us
information on what the local undead are up to so I can stop it."

     "Us?" Joyce asked.

     "Well," Buffy spoke slowly, she knew this part would be hard for her
mother, "Giles is my Watcher. He researches prophecies, demons, what vamps
might in the neighbourhood and what there weaknesses are. And he teaches me
how to fight. Well, more like acts as a live punching bag while I practice.
I try not to hurt him. Much."

     Giles cheeks coloured slightly. He knew Buffy usually held back when
they sparred, but this was the first time she'd actually admitted it.

     "And Willow?" Joyce asked.

     "She stumbled on to the truth about me," Buffy said, "And refused to
stumble back out of it."

     "Buffy saved my life," Willow added, "So now I help out with the
research and stuff. I can usually dig up stuff on the Net we can use.
Almost as much as what Giles has in those books of his. Xander and Cordy
help out, too. I like to call us the Slayerettes."

     "Do your parents know?" Joyce wondered, "Am I the only one who didn't?"

     "Oh no," Willow replied, her expression stricken, "You won't tell
them, will you? Please don't tell them. I don't want them to worry. I'm
careful, and I try to stay out of the actual Slaying."

     Joyce looked at Giles. His expression was certainly revealing. She
could see the concern on his face. He worried about the children's
involvement, she could tell. And when he exchanged a speaking look with
Buffy, she realized he worried about her daughter as well.

     "All right," Joyce acquiesced, "But it's getting late. You should
probably be getting home, Willow. Will you be okay, or should I drive you?"

     "I can walk her home," Angel offered, his eyes finding Buffy's.

     "I'll be safe with Angel," Willow said, catching Buffy's nod and grin.

     "Mr. Giles," Joyce added, "Would you mind staying? I'd like to speak
with some more about all this."

     Again, Joyce noticed the silent exchange between the librarian and her
daughter. From the corner of her eye, she saw Buffy's barely perceptible
nod before her daughter got up to escort the others to the door. Giles
returned to the chair and prepared himself for the barrage of questions he
was sure Joyce was about to ask.

     "You were pretty good with my crossbow, Willow," Buffy said as she
opened the front door, "Have you been practicing without telling me?"

     Willow looked down and shuffled her feet nervously.

     "Yes," she confessed, "After what happened the night of the Spring
Fling, I asked Giles to teach me how to use a crossbow. I had to work on
him for a while before he agreed, but he has been teaching me."

     "Why, Will?" Buffy asked, curious.

     "I can't fight like you can, Buffy," Willow replied, "So I thought I'd
better learn how to use something with a little more range. Just in case.
And I wanted to be able to do *something* if you ever needed backup
sometime. It came in handy tonight, didn't it?"

     "Will, you are the best," Buffy asserted, drawing her friend into a
hug, "But you be careful. I don't want anything to happen to you, so no
independent safaris, okay?"

     "Okay," Willow assured her friend, "Besides, dust doesn't make a very
noteworthy trophy. Hard to hang of the wall."

     Buffy chuckled and playfully swatted Willow on the arm. She gave Angel
a hug and closed the door behind them.

     Buffy stuck her head back into the living room to find her mother and
her Watcher deeply involved in their discussion. Buffy wasn't sure she
wanted to know what they were talking about, but she hoped Giles would be
careful about what he said. Her mother may have come around and accepted
the whole Slayer deal, but some of the gang's past experiences should
probably not be revealed right now. Her Mom needed more time to let it all
sink in before that happened.

     "I'm gonna go to bed now," Buffy said, interrupting them, "Or do you
want me stay down here and talk some more?"

     "You go on up, Buffy," Joyce told her, "I'm sure we'll be having a lot
of talks about everything over the next few days. And I think I need a
little time to really take this all in. I won't keep Mr. Giles too long,
honey."

     "Okay, Mom," Buffy replied, "Night Mom, Giles."

     Giles smiled slightly as he watched his Slayer head up the stairs
before turning his attention back to Joyce. He would make every effort to
help Mrs. Summers cope with the knowledge that had been revealed tonight.
He could almost sense the same strength he so admired in Buffy in her
mother as well. It may take a little time, and there would undoubtably be
difficulties, but he was sure Joyce would eventually be accepting of her
daughter's destiny.

     THE END



Noel:"Disappointment doesn't kill."
Abby:"Right. Rejection kills. Disappointment only maims."
          -- "The Truth About Cats and Dogs"

An optimist sees the glass half full
A pessimist sees the glass half empty
And a realist understands that soon he's going to have to wash the glass

In a world of shit you hold your nose and swim.

Don't worry about the bullet with your name on it, worry about the one
addressed "to whom it may concern".


     @-}-}--          tj thwaites          @-}-}--
     @-}-}--       tthwaite@banff.net      @-}-}--
     @-}-}--  Box 2890, Banff, AB, T0L 0C0 @-}-}--






-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Black Fire <blackfire42@yahoo.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Legacy of the Burgunds (0/?)
Date: 15 Oct 1998 16:32:55 -0700 (PDT)

Title: Legacy of the Burgunds
Author: Black Fire
Email: blackfire42@yahoo.com
Spoilers: Up through at least Faith, Hope and Trick.  I need to see
what happens with the next few episodes.
Disclaimers: I don't own any of the Buffy characters and I can't
afford to.  (Though, I wish I could, a least afford to.)  Any other
characters (I haven't even given them names yet, how lame) are mine. 
Please do not use them without asking.
Summary: This story is heavilly based in Germanic/Norse mythology,
particularly, on the Saga of the Volsungs.  Two of the greatest
legends of the past have returned, bringing who-knows-what with them.


Legacy of the Burgunds

Prologue - At the Well of Memory

	The night in Sunnydale was unusually quiet.  The midnight air draped
the town like a soft blanket.  And somewhere, deep in the woods, the
only sound that could be heard for miles was the soft sound of singing.
	In a clearing, beyond a grove of bushes, a large circle had been
formed.  Inside the circle, a robed and hooded figure knelt before a
stone alter.  A pot of incense smoked at the back end of the circle to
the rhythm of the figure's ancient chants, as it sang into a drinking
horn.
	The casual observer, standing outside the circle, would have seen
just this and nothing more.  However, this was not what the figure in
the circle saw.
	To enter the circle, would have been to enter another dimension, of
sorts.  The harrow, and everything else within the circle, hung
suspended in the center of a threefold sphere of red light.  Where the
ground should have been, each sphere passed through a ring of archaic
characters, which also glowed red.  Above the figure's head, an object
spun so fast that its design was impossible to distinguish.
	As the figure continued to sing, the ground reappeared.  Only now,
instead of bushes, a single giant tree grew out of an even larger
stone well.  The tree and well, though awesome in size, seemed to
dwell at the edge of the sphere, neither intruding upon the figure's
working space, nor reaching beyond borders of the shield.
	As the chanting ended, the horn became a miniaturized version of the
tree and well.  The winds within the sphere stilled, causing the
single earthly source of light, the flame of a large blue candle, to
stand perfectly straight.  The figure sat in silence, staring into the
waters of the well.  It then drew the cup to its lips and drained the
horn of its contents.
	From behind closed eyes, the figure was suddenly bombarded by a
barrage of images; a burning mountain, a funeral pyre.  A large man
being stabbed in the back and a pair of eyes filled with hatred. 
There were, also, scenes of men and women meeting in different time
periods and dying tragically.
	And, all the while, a choir of howling wolves and shrieking ravens
attacked the ears.  They seemed to be accusing the person of
something, but it was too loud and incomprehensible.
	Then... all was silent.  The images dissolved into a single vision of
a dark alleyway where two other figures, a man and a woman, stood
facing each other.  Without warning, the two charged each other and
the world exploded.
	"NO!!" the figure screamed, eyes snapping open.
	Quickly, the figure finished the ritual and then dissolved the
shields.  Gathering up all it's tools, the hooded figure rushed out of
the woods and back into town.

*   *   *   *   *

	A few miles away, a girl, who should have been used to bad dreams by
now, shot up out of bed.  She had seen nothing of what the other had
seen, save the an explosion of apocalyptic proportions.
	Knowing instantly what to do, she reached for the phone and pushed
the first number on the speed dial.  The phone on the other end didn't
even finish ringing once when it was picked up.
	"Yes?" a British voice asked on the other end of the line.
	"It's me, Giles," the girl said.  "I'm on my way to your place. 
You're not going to like this."
	"What is it?" Giles asked.
	"I don't know yet," the girl answered, "but it's not going to be
pretty."
	The girl hung up the phone as her mother walked into the room.
	"Buffy?" Joyce asked.  "I heard you scream."
	"I have to go to work," Buffy said as she pulled on the first pieces
of clothing she grabbed.
	"Well... be careful... I guess," Joyce said, nervously.
	"I will, Mom," Buffy said as she hurried out of the room and down the
stairs.  "Bye."
	Buffy was at an almost full sprint by the time she got to the end of
the block, and she didn't stop until she reached Giles's apartment.

*   *   *   *   *

==

The Black Fire          | Vote for me in the Site Fights!!
Blackfire42@yahoo.com | http://www.thesitefights.com/sarina/cavern1.htm
         http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Shadowlands/4203
"But if they all forget me I will be here anyway, like an artifact
     of some lost civilization" -Vlad Dracula _The Dracula Tape_
          "Don't worry.  I'm not here to eat."  -- Angel (IG)
_________________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Aglx@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: The Soul of Good & Evil (4/?)
Date: 16 Oct 1998 00:07:36 EDT

Title: The Soul of Good & Evil (4/?)
Author: Michelle
E-mail: Aglx@aol.com
Rating: PG-13 -- Violence, bank robbery.
Author's Notes: This story follows directly after my two others, 
"Vengeance," and "Lost & Found." I rewrote the third part with a 
completely different plot (the story that this is an alternate for is,
"Deadly Instincts." Basically, everyone is a vampire, with a 
soul except Drusilla.  Buffy, Willow, Xander, Angel, Giles, Joyce, 
everybody.  http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html
Spoilers: Plot has nothing to do with real series except for characters
that are used.
Feedback: I know there are people on this list. Too bad no one bothers
to send feedback. If you would, I'd appreciate it.  I send it to you!

* * * * *

"Where are we going?"

"I have to make a few stops. Willow won't be here until sunset
tomorrow, right?" Buffy asked, looking over at Xander.

"Right."

They were driving in a beautiful cherry red convertible with the
top up.  Buffy refused to drive anything less, especially those old
fashioned cars with spray painted windows vampires were so found
of using to block the sun. She just figured it was much easier to 
just drive during the night and sleep during the day.

"So what stops do we have to make?" Xander asked, trying to start
up a conversation and kill the painful silence.

"Assuming I get out of this alive, I never want to see this town
again." Buffy took her gaze off the road one more time to look at 
Xander with such great pain filling her eyes.  "I need to clean out 
my bank account and tie up a few loose ends."

"Okay."

They drove a for a few more minutes before pulling into a bank 
parking lot.

"You wanna come in, or wait here?"  Buffy turned off the engine 
and turned to Xander and asked.

"I'll wait here. Keep an eye out."

"For what? Oh wait. Excuse to get out of coming in. Clever." Xander 
just smiled as Buffy slid out of the driver seat and locked the doors 
on her way out.

He watched her as she strode up to the doors with such confidence. 
< How does she do it? How could she just stay here all this time and 
not let everything that has happened get to her? >

~ ~ ~ ~

Buffy stood in line behind about eight other people, growing more
impatient by the second.  She looked around to check the scene.
Two tellers were working the late night shift. By straining her senses, 
she could tell the manager was staying late and working in his office 
down the hall.  She could hear him talking on the phone to someone, 
but she felt uncomfortable listening to his conversation. < Just because
I have these senses doesn't mean I have to use them. > She reasoned 
with herself.

"Next," the teller closest to the far wall called. A man started 
towards her and just then, Buffy noticed three more men dressed 
completely in black enter the bank. Even though they hid it, she knew 
they had several weapons on them.

< Great. > Buffy thought. < Just what I need. The banks gonna get robbed, 
and somehow I just had to be here tonight. >  The teller gave worried 
glances to her co-worker, who immediately reached for the alarm button.

"Don't you even think about touching that. I swear I'll blow your head 
off!"   The man whipped out an automatic weapon that would carry out 
his threat quite nicely. 

< Cocky. Too bad for him I had to be here. I'm the queen of cocky. >

"Everyone down now!" the man shouted. He raised the gun and the three
by the doors slowly approached. Obviously figuring they weren't going
to get caught, they stupidly forgot to wear masks.

Everyone in the bank dropped to the ground except the two tellers and 
Buffy.

"What's the matter with your ears? Didn't you hear me? Ground now!"
The man kept his weapon pointed at the teller but indicated the floor 
with his free hand.

"Hmmm. Let me think about that one. Uh, no!" Buffy said with a
faint smile.

The man turned the weapon on her and pointed it at her forehead. He
held it with a shaky hand while Buffy calmly refused to move. She
held her ground and her smile. These guys weren't going to get out
of here with a cent.  The only way they were getting out was hand
cuffed in the back of a black and white with the lights flashing
furiously above them.

"Come on. You're not going to shoot anyone." Buffy knocked his gun
away from her with her supernatural strength and he almost lost his grip 
on it.

"You're crazy, bitch. I'll shoot you and everyone else in here if
I have to." He regained his hold on the weapon and raised it yet
again to her head.

"Fine! Go ahead. Shoot 'em all. Take you gun and put a bullet into 
everyone here. See if I care."

"You better get down and kiss the carpet, lady. Or I'll blow you to bits."

Buffy knew that with his weapon, he could kill her, but she wasn't about 
to let him in on that little secret. She watched as the people around her 
stared, their fear silently screaming at her to save them.  They couldn't 
care less who she was, they just knew that she was the only one there 
that stood between them and their deaths.

"Like I said before. No." Her method of choice was risky and something 
that would be found in the movies, but it was the only chance she had 
to save all the innocent people in the bank, along with herself.

"Boys. Get the money. If they try anything, kill them. Do you _hear_
me?"

They all announced their agreement with powerful voices and they
moved to the tellers and instructed them to the back where the vault 
was. They knew the money in the drawers had alarm buttons and they 
weren't about to voluntarily call the police to their little party.

"Fine!"  The robber dropped his automatic weapon and reached for a
handgun at the back of his belt.  He reached down, grabbed a woman
from the floor and pulled her up. Holding her tightly against his body 
with one arm and the gun sharply against her temple, he hoped to seem 
threatening enough for Buffy to do what he said.  "You back off. Or she 
dies!"

"Think about it this way. For everyone in here that you kill, that's just 
how many more family members, and friends that are going to be sitting 
in that court room, while you stand on trial for multiple murders. Facing 
a life sentence in jail with no chance for parole or if you really lucky, the 
death penalty. They'll stare at you with their empty eyes.  Their souls 
destroyed. Their lives taken away and it's all because of you. You and 
the psychotic thoughts that persuaded you to go out, get a gun and come 
in  here to rob a bank. And hey, why you were at it, you decided to kill 
a few people just for the hell of it!" 

With her hands on her hips, and her eyes boring into his, she made 
herself seem as intimidating as possible. 

"Shut-up!"

"Why? Because you know every word that's coming from my mouth is
true?" Buffy took a few steps closer to him.   By this time the
manager emerged from his office at the direction of one of the
robbers. He was the only one with the key and combination to the
vault.

"Damit, lady. Just shut-up!" He moved the gun slightly away from
the woman's face as if he planned to use it on Buffy.

"Go ahead. Kill her. Put a bullet into her and then watch as she
takes her last breath. As her heart beats one last time. Watch as
her eyes plead with yours for any possible chance of her survival.
When she knows, everything is over with and you took it all away."
Buffy stopped.  The words she was saying were all too close to her
own previous lifestyles. But she stayed calm and concentrated on
keeping the maniac with the gun from hurting anyone. 

"So why don't you let the lady go, and put the gun to good use...on 
me. That's who you really wanna kill, isn't it?"  

"Damn right." He threw the woman to the ground and she silently
mouthed the words, "Thank you."

"Go ahead. Take that gun in your hands, raise it, load it, and
fire right here," Buffy said pointing to a spot on the center of
her forehead. She was taking a gamble. By the way the man was
holding he gun and the amount of shaking he was doing, she hoped
that he couldn't hit a target, regardless of its difficulty.

The man fired. The bullet lodged itself in her left leg.

The bullet hit her with immense force but she didn't even wince.
Buffy glanced down at the wound, which she could feel was quickly
healing despite the horrifying burning she felt racing through her
body. "Not even close," she said with a laugh. "Maybe it will
help if I move a bit closer." Her approach threw him off balance
for a second. He definitely wasn't anticipating her survival at
this point.  Breathing heavily, he tightened his arm, as if it would 
help him hit her more directly.

Stupidly, he took the gun and fired again. This time, he hit her
directly in the stomach. Right where the her wound from the stake
was still healing. Buffy doubled over and moaned. < He had to miss
and shoot me there! > Her body encouraged her to stop and nurse her
wounds but she refused to give in.  Standing straight again, she
broke out into a hysterical laugh as he watched her, horrified.

"Close, but not really." Buffy moved towards him at a determined
pace, ignoring the pain each step caused. His three accomplices
only stood behind the counter with bags of money, unsure of what
to do. "I try to help you out. I even move within five feet of
you and yet you couldn't hit me if your three buddies helped you."

Buffy was finally within inches of him. She had pushed the gun out
of his hand and was now safely holding it in her own. He didn't
know what to do.  He just stood there, frozen. "On your knees,"
she ordered in a voice too low for her gender. She was disgusted
with this man and if it wasn't for the audience she had, she would
have revealed her true self and killed him right then and there.

The man complied and dropped to his knees. Buffy smiled and stepped
back a bit.  Before he had a chance to try anything, she knocked
him out cold with a solid kick to the face.

"You kiss the ground," she hissed before turning her attention to
the three other robbers behind the counter.  Without thinking, they
dropped the money and their weapons and raised their hands high
into the air.  "Is everyone okay?"

Silent nods came from all the people in the bank.  Just then, the
sound of sirens came flooding into the streets. Lights of blue and
red and white flashed through the clouded windows.

"The cops are here. They'll take care of everything. Take those
weapons away from them." The two tellers grabbed the guns and 
placed them on a desk out of the three's reach.

"Miss?" A young woman asked from the floor.

"Hmm?" Buffy was distracted. There were cops everywhere and she 
would be ash-tray sized if the cops questioned her. The last thing she 
needed was to spend the night in a jail and have the police find out 
she was a member of the walking dead.

"Who or what are you?"

"You don't want to know," Buffy said with such sickening honesty.

"Whoever you are, thank you. You saved all our lives," one of the
tellers said while holding a hand over her rapidly beating heart.

"Is there a way out the back?" Buffy asked the manager who had
finally come out of his office.

"Yes, this way. But the police?"

"I don't have time. I have to go. Please don't stop me."

"You saved all our lives. Letting you go would be the least I could
do."

"Thank you. Once I'm gone, someone go out and tell the police you're
okay." With that, Buffy hopped over the counter and followed
the man to the back door. Luckily the cops hadn't moved to the back
yet and she had time to sneak out.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 
Well, if you read it, I'd appreciate some feedback. Even if you hated it.
I'll take anything, even flames!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: taygeta@juno.com (C. Catherine)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: IOHM (9/10)
Date: 23 Oct 1998 23:07:14 -0700

TITLE: In Opacitatem Habitant Modo #9 Druscilla
AUTHOR: Taygeta
E-MAIL: taygeta@juno.com
FEEDBACK:  Very muchly wanted (bad or good...whatever the complaint)
DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just tell me first.
RATING: PG-13
KEYWORDS: Buffy is blind.  Various POVs.  
DISCLAIMER:  The characters portrayed in this fanfic and any such
reference to Buffy the Vampire Slayer television series belong to their
creator, Joss Whedon, and their owners, Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui
Productions, Sanddollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox. In other
words, they do not belong to me.  Copyright infringement not intended.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
In Opacitatem Habitant Modo
#9 Druscilla
By: Taygeta

His ashes…they lie scattered on the floor where last they fell when *she*
drove a stake into his heart.  There in the cracked cement he lies in
itsy-bitsy pieces…it's all I've got left of him…of Spike  - my Spike - he
is gone…and SHE took him away.  

Murderess!  Destroyer!  Slayer!  She is but all and more - a thorn at my
side that gnaws at me night and day and day and night.  For all of this -
for the humanity felt by my Angel, for the death of Spike, for the times
near that she has wanted to destroy me and all - I shall vow to the my
creator her end.

She will die.  She will pay for what she has done to us - to me.  Buffy
the Vampire Slayer…slayer of my happy family no more…will be no more.

Yes, I have taken her eyes…those precious eyes…and I have left her in the
dark.  She is lost in the bloody Black where I dwell my days away.  And
although, I know that she is suffering in life now and revel in that very
knowledge, I want more - I crave more. 

Before I take a knife to her dainty, little throat…or pierce her beating
heart like she did my Spike…before any harm comes to her - physically - I
want to wring her insides like Mum's kitchen maid did the wash.  She may
not be able to see her friends suffer, but she will *hear* their cries. 
Her ears shall bleed as the pain in their screams grow louder and louder
and I shall whisper into those very ears, tales of their torture and what
she has in store for her own destiny.

"Druscilla…"

"Angel, leave me be."

"You have to eat, Dru…there's no way you can defeat the slayer - you
couldn't defeat Xander for that matter - if you don't have your
strength."

"Leave me be."

"Fine, have it your way."

Angel wants me dead…I can feel it.  He wants to take the joy of
destroying her away from me, but he shall never do that.  He shall only
assist me, when I break her neck - poison her from inside to out -
whatever it is that will deem her the *most* painful of ends.  Whatever
it is that will deem me the satisfaction of destruction…of everything…of
anything…Buffy.

"In opacitatem habitant modo…we live only in darkness…it is our dwelling,
our domicile, our home…your death."

___________________________________________________________________
You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail.
Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Michael Held <mheld@starnetinc.net>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Buffy Fan Fiction
Date: 17 Oct 1998 12:08:11 -0500

A short piece of Buffy Fan Fiction is located at:

http://www.2diefor.com/buffyfic.htm

I hope to add more soon.  Thanks.
--
Michael C. Held
Palatine, Illinois
mheld@starnetinc.net
http://pwp.starnetinc.com/mheld/
http://www.2diefor.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: taygeta@juno.com (C. Catherine)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: test
Date: 25 Oct 1998 18:50:22 -0800

Ignore this message, just testing something...

___________________________________________________________________
You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail.
Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: ~Ripe Wicked Plum~ <lebo@gte.net>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: SpikeFic: Sister of Night (1/1)
Date: 19 Oct 1998 00:55:50 -0400

Title: Sister of Night (1/1)
Author: ~Ripe Wicked Plum~ a.k.a. Goth Spike
E-mail: ripe_wicked_plum@hotmail.com
Feedback: "Fancy it, Pet?"
Distribution: Spike's Spike (if sandycat wants it) and Spike Girls. 
All others please ask first.
Rating: PG
Summary: Spike/Drusilla song fic.
Disclaimer: Spike, Dru, and Angel are all Joss' creatures. I'm just
borrowing them to amuse myself. "Sister of Night" is all the work of 
M.L. Gore. I'm just borrowing his beautiful words to help tell a tale.
It can be found on Depeche Mode's Ultra album.
Notes: My first Spike/Dru fic. I never thought I'd do one, but this song
just spoke to me. Takes place during "What's My Line?" Part two, before
Spike wakes Dru up. Told from Spike's point of view, similar to a stream
of consciousness.

        I can hear the radio playing as I walk down the stairs. I drop
my
captive on the landing and cross over to the bed where she lays. She
looks
so peaceful. I love to watch her sleep. Her dark hair fanned out on her
pillow. My princess. My frail, sick princess. 
        It's been so hard for me to see her like this. I watched her
grow
weaker and weaker. First she stopped hunting, then she stopped feeding
altogether. 
        
"Sister of night
when the hunger descends
and your body's a fire
an inferno that never ends
an eternal flame
that burns in desire's name"

        She's dreaming, I can tell. Her hands are grabbing at something.
Sometimes I try to guess what it is. Maybe she's picking flowers, or
catching bubbles, or snowflakes. Dru always loved to catch them on her
tongue. Maybe when this is all over we'll go back to England for winter.
She'll like that. We'll go back to the old house and forget about
SunnyHell or whatever this blasted place is called. 
        The Hellmouth was supposed to help her get strong again, but so
far
it's only made things worse. It's that bloody Slayer. She's been taking
my attention away from Dru. Instead of staying home and taking care of
her like I should, I've been fighting that blonde bitch constantly. It's
time to put her in the ground and get back to taking care of Dru.

"Sister of night
when the longing returns
giving voice to the flame
calling you through flesh that burns
breaking down your will
to move in for the kill"

        I can hear her whispering something. Probably bits of an old
song or a
nursery rhyme. She does that a lot. She might be talking to her family.
I've overheard her talk to her mother several times. She usually wakes
up crying. She does that a lot, too. Not too much lately, though. She
hasn't had the energy to waste on tears.
        Every now and then I see a bit of the old Dru. That glimmer in
her
eyes. I know she's still in there somewhere. This ritual has got to
work. It's her last hope. I can't lose her. Not now. She's all I've got.

"Oh sister
come for me
embrace me
assure me
hey sister
I feel it too
sweet sister
just feel me
I'm trembling
you heal me
hey sister
I feel it too"

        I look over at Miss Edith, Dru's favorite doll. I've always 
hated the damn thing, but I'd never tell her that. No matter how much
hair she loses or how cracked her porcelain features become, Dru doesn't
seem to mind. She takes better care of that bloody doll than she does
herself. Not a day goes by that Miss Edith doesn't have a tea party with
cake and scones. Yet, Dru will go weeks without eating. She acts like it
doesn't matter whether she lives or dies.
        She just keeps getting worse. The slightest breeze knocks her
over. She
can scarcely hold her head up anymore; she's so weak. She has so many
bruises on her arms that I'm almost afraid to touch her these days. I'm
scared I might break her. 

"Sister of night
in your saddest dress
as you walk through the light
you're desperate to impress
so you slide to the floor
feeling insecure"

        There he sits on the stairs. Angelus the beautiful. Her kind and
loving
sire. Bastard. Drove her insane before he turned her. It's all his fault
she's the way she is.
        Dru just hasn't been the same since he left us. She's so
different
now. Her eyes, so sad. Sometimes, when she doesn't know I'm watching, I
see her looking at it. The portrait we had painted before he left. The
three of us, in our prime. I wanted to burn it, but Dru wouldn't let me.
She still loves him. She still loves him more than me.
        If I didn't need him to cure her, I'd kill him. I'd stake him
and dance
on his ashes. How dare he make us and then leave us? He just tossed us
aside like we were trash. We were his children, not his toys. Did
Angelus really think that he could turn his back on us and never pay the
consequences? He's going to die and I'm going to be the one to make it
happen. It's going to be better than bloody Christmas!

"Sister of night
with the loneliest eyes
tell yourself it's alright
he'll make such a perfect prize
but the cold light of day
will give the game away"

        Then I'll have her back. My beautiful princess. With her pale
skin and
dark hair. With those eyes. Oh, those eyes. I swear sometimes I lose
myself in them. Then there's the way she touches me. No matter how
furious I am
she calms me with the slightest touch. Sometimes I wish I could stay
mad. Sometimes I wish she didn't affect me so. Sometimes I wish I didn't
need her so much.
        I've never been dependent on anything before. Even my need for
blood
doesn't control me like she does. One glance and I melt like butter. I
know I shouldn't let her have that kind of control, but I can't help it.
She is the one shred of humanity left untouched by the demon inside me.
The one thing that keeps me from being like the rest of my kind. 
        I just wish that she could make this uncertainty go away. For
the first
time in my life I'm scared. I don't know what I'll do if the ritual
doesn't work. I can't lose Dru. She's my princess. She's my world. 

"Oh sister
come for me
embrace me
assure me
hey sister
I feel it too
sweet sister
just feel me
I'm trembling
you heal me
hey sister
I feel it too"

        I turn the radio off and sit down on the edge of the bed. She's
starting to stir. I touch her hair, wanting to let her sleep, but
knowing she needs to wake.
        Dru wakes, moaning a weak, "I was dreaming."
        "Of what, Pet?" I ask, genuinely curious.
        "We were in Paris. You 'ad a branding iron."
        Not feeling very nostalgic, I call her attention to present
times, "I
brought you something."
        I cross the room and pick Angelus up, dragging him into the room
as Dru
mumbles something about worms and a baguette.
        "Your sire, my sweet," I say, dumping him onto the floor.
        With some sadness, I see her perk up, "My Angel?"
        I come back over to the bed, saying, "The one and only. Now all
we
need's the full moon tonight, and he will die, and you will be fully
restored." I take the hand she offers, continuing, "My black goddess." I
kiss her hand and work up her arm, tempted to bite her. "My ripe, wicked
plum." 
        I want her so bad I can almost taste it. Even after all these
years,
she still lights a flame in me like no one else ever could. 
        I raise my head and look into those eyes, "It's been--"
        "Forever," she finishes, kissing me.
        Every inch of my body is on fire. It always reacts to her touch.
It's
like a drug. When I get a little taste of it I want more. I have to have
more. Every thought that rushes through my brain now tells me to take
her.
Take her right there on the bed in front of Angelus. Make him watch. We
break apart and I start to go back for more, but she stops me.
        "Spike, let me have him."
        She's been kissing me and thinking of him? I try to hide my
disappointment, but she sees it. She pushes further, making her point
clearer.
        "Hmm? Until the moon."
        She wants to torture him. I understand now. I suppose I should
let her
have her fun. She'll be happy, Angelus will be miserable, and it'll give
me time to get some sleep.
        I smile at the thought of Angelus suffering, "Alright, you can
play,
but don't kill him. He mustn't die 'til the ritual."
        "Bring him to me," she says, standing up.
        I go over to the father who abandoned us and yank him off of the
floor.
He struggles a bit as I drag him over to her. I see that twinkle in her
eye. My princess is back, if only for the moment. She grabs hold of his
chin, forcing him to look at her. To see the girl that he drove insane.
To see the monster he made.
        "You've been a very bad daddy," she says before slapping him
across the
face.
        I smile, quite pleased with her. I wasn't expecting her to want
to make
him suffer. Maybe this is a good sign. Perhaps she'll be back to her old
self after tonight. Then we can hunt together all night and play all
day. Like old times. Except this time, no Angelus to spoil the fun. Just
the two of us. Like it should be.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

~Ripe Wicked Plum~ <---who feels really nervous about this fic...it's
different from my normal work. Don't know if that's a good thing or a
bad thing.
-- 
Goth Spike/ICQ=2607806/Member:Spike Girls/Spike4Sexiest/Spike's
Minions/Spuffy/Spike's Sweeties (#2)/SOOA[Major General (#5)]/I'm
Spike's Ducks/Pres. and founder of the Leo is a Bloody Whelp Club/Keeper
of Spike's terms of endearment and his gloves/Guardian of Spike's
humanity, his amusement at Buffy's Hallowe'en costume, and his ability
to swallow his pride and help Buffy/Keeper of Dru's spiffy wardrobe and
her bruises/ Guardian of Dru's gothness and her fondness for Rasputina.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "The Mistress" <mattacks@hotmail.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Samhain Intermission" 1/1
Date: 20 Oct 1998 11:47:27 EDT

Title: "Samhain Intermission"
Author: EA Karras
Feedback: I live for it.
Distribution: Slayerfanfic, but I'll stick it in the submission box.  
All others, ask.
Rating: PG
Summary: Whistler meets a psychic teacher, and brings him to Sunnydale. 
Disclaimer:Whistler is Joss' creature of demonic beauty.  Tom Grissom is 
mine, and is usually found in my Homicide fic.  
Notes: There's a fic that comes after this, but it's a Homicide fic.  So 
if you want to read it, email me.  It's entitled "Samhain Rain".  
There's spoilers for Becoming in here, I think.  This is part of a 
series, entitled: "External POV".  This is occuring during Buffy's 
Halloween ep. This fic is also part of a series entitled: "Alt Six", and 
takes place after two other fics.  If you want to know what happened to 
Tom before this, but don't want to wait for the sequel, email me. 
Thanks.  

-----

October 31, 1997 

Catherine Dulgar shook her head, smiling at her brother in a semi-amused 
manner. She was ten years older than him and never 
gave up a chance to let him know it. "You look like hell, Tom." She had 
been out of town when he was shot, and had thrown a fit when 
she'd come home. 

"I feel it." Tom had spent most of his sick leave working at his 
sister's bar. He was due back at Loch Raven after the weekend, and 
dreading every minute of it. Some might call it fear, he called it 
progressive paranoia. "But, I'll be fine. I always am." 

"I worry about you, little brother." She squeezed his shoulder, 
lovingly. "Would you mind closing up tonight? I know it's short notice, 
but..." 

He took her order book, and nodded. "No, it's ok. Mike's working late." 
The truth was, he had been avoiding Mike, and Mike had been avoiding 
him. "Taking Julie trick or treating?" 

She nodded, and hated herself when she saw the sad look in his eyes. 
"You sure you'll be ok?" He smiled, and nodded. She gave him a peck 
on the cheek. "Call me when you get home. Ok?" 

"Yeah." 

*** 

He closed up at midnight, not having the energy to stay open any later. 
Cathy hadn't minded, as she'd said: she worried about him. Checking the 
lock, he turned around to find someone standing right behind him. His 
heart practically leapt into his heart. "We're closed..." he blurted 
out. 

"The Oracle...huh. I knew one of those once..." The man resembled Brodie 
in a way, and sounded a lot like him. "Referring to any particular one?" 

"Um..." Tom was unnerved. "No. It's sort of a family joke...Don't I know 
you?" 

"Not yet. You want to?" 

Grinning, the psychic laughed. "You use that line often?" 

The man thought. "Hm...not since the '30s..." 

"You look a little young for the 1930s. What're you, a vampire or 
something?" 

The conversationalist's turn to laugh. "No, I'm not a vampire." He 
looked serious now. "But, my best friend is..." He took a step 
towards Grissom, who backed up. 

Tom felt a chill go through him. Something told him this guy was for 
real. "Yeah? Well, mine's a cop..." 

Following him out of the entrance, the guy tried to smooth things over. 
"Relax, guy. Look, I'm not going to hurt you..." 

"Right." 

"I need your help." He looked frustrated when Tom wouldn't stop walking. 
"As a psychic and as a teacher, Mr. Grissom." 

That got Grissom's attention. He froze to the spot. "How'd you know 
my name?" He still didn't turn to the other man. 

"I know a lot about you. Failed marriage. Dead daughter. Love affairs 
gone horribly wrong. You could be an Shakespearean tragedy. Believe me, 
I knew the guy. He'd love you..." 

"You..." 

"And I know you're dying. And I can help." 

"You...Who are you?" 

"Whistler. Call me Whistler..." 

"Why do you need my help?" 

"Let me show you..." 

*** 

"I did not 'stand him up'," Kellerman said over his beer. Munch and 
Lewis both stood behind the bar, each had a different degree of 
annoyance on their face. "I didn't." 

Lewis rolled his eyes. "You lied to him, then. You told him you were 
working to avoid seeing him." 

"Sounds like a stand up to me.." Munch polished a glass. "What'd he do, 
throw another potato at you?" 

"He didn't do anything..." 

Lewis looked at Munch, and grinned. "Uh huh." 

*** 

Tom closed his apartment door behind him. "So show me..." Whistler 
grabbed his hand. "What...?" Maybe he'd been wrong about this guy. 

"I want you to look into my mind." 

"I can't..." 

Whistler shook his head. "You can, I know you can. Do it." 

Closing his eyes, Tom took in a deep breath. 

He could see fire...flames...creation...everything...

"Oh my God..." 

He could see everything. Usually the things he saw when connected to 
someone mind, on the rare occasion he did it, were little snippets. The 
little things, or bits of the big picture. With Whistler, he could see 
everything. Everything he'd done, and been. Everyone Whistler had ever 
known. Creatures he'd never even dreamed existed. 

When he came out of it, he was being supported by Whistler. His legs 
threatened to collapse. "Oh my God..." 

"I think you may have gone a bit overboard..." Whistler helped the 
psychic to a chair. 

"Why do you need my help?" Tom whispered, hoarsely. Whistler was 
obviously a very capable person. Or whatever he was. 

Whistler pulled over another chair, and sat in front of Tom. "You're 
a good teacher, and you could be a great psychic if you could always do 
what you just did. I want you to help me help the Slayer, and I'll help 
you with your cancer..." 

"How can you help me?" 

"The hellmouth has...healing properties..." 

"The hellmouth?" 

"Boca de Infierno, baby." Whistler grinned, teasingly. "Come with 
me to Sunnydale. I'll show you what I mean." 

Tom shook his head. "I've got obligations..." 

"Some obligations. A lover who avoids you, and a school you're 
afraid to go back to..." He grinned, even more sillier. "Nice." 

*** 

Mike felt guilty about avoiding Tom, though he was aware Tom had been 
doing the same to him. He stopped by Tom's apartment to find it 
almost completely empty.

His clothes, and several boxes of junk were gone. There were three notes 
on the fridge, one for Cathy, one for him, the third a letter 
of resignation. 

"Mike, 

Love you much. Call you soon. Job opened up in Calif., grabbed it up. 
I'll be back, I promise. 

Tom" 

Kellerman stared at the note, unsure of what he was supposed to do, or 
how he was supposed to feel. 

----

I know...pretty bad...




______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: sah <romana@mindspring.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: ADMIN:  List rules
Date: 20 Oct 1998 13:42:09 -0400

Welcome!  This list is for fiction related to "Buffy The Vampire 
Slayer," both the TV series and the movie.  To ensure that we all get 
to enjoy as much fiction as possible, please adhere to the following 
guidelines, and please save them for future reference.

1. Fiction should have Buffy characters in it and clearly be related 
to Buffy.  Crossovers are great, and expected, but general 
vampire/monster stories that aren't in the Buffy universe and don't 
use Buffy characters belong somewhere else.

2. Discussion of posted fiction is permitted onlist.  Please put 
"DISCUSS" in your subject line.  Requests for missing story parts 
should go directly to the author, and not be posted to the list.

Discussion that is not related directly to the fiction should go over 
to the general Buffy list.  Discussion of fiction is expected to 
follow common netiquette guidelines and use PG-13 language.

3. No advertising of <any> items or services, Buffy related or not, 
and no posting of non-story items such as .gifs, sound files, etc..  
No attached files of <any> kind-- if your mailer makes your fiction 
into attached files, you need to find another way to get it to the list.

4. If you're writing a story and including advance information on a 
new episode, and you're posting your story earlier than the national 
viewing time, please:

     **Mark the post as a "spoiler" in the subject header.  
     **Leave about twelve lines (blank or with non-spoiler info) at 
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This ensures that anyone who doesn't like knowing about an episode 
ahead of time is "protected."  :)   The blank space is for people whose 
mailers automatically open up the next piece of mail, without giving 
them a chance to see "spoiler" in the header.

Spoiler warnings are not necessary after the start of the episode's 
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If you have a question about something's suitability for posting, feel 
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Again, welcome!  If  you have any questions about these rules, please 
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 & 
sah (romana@mindspring.com)
Listowners, Buffy the Vampire Slayer Fiction List
buffyfic@xmission.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: sah <romana@mindspring.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: ADMIN:  Netiquette
Date: 20 Oct 1998 13:42:35 -0400

Please save this for future reference, or if you have questions.

These are just a few netiquette conventions we'd like people to use, though
they aren't list rules per se.

1.  Mailing lists ARE NOT chat rooms.  When you post, a copy of your note
goes out to the 900+ people subscribed to these lists.  Please make sure
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2.  This is a public mailing list.  That means that anyone on the internet
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3.  If you have problems with list content, or with something someone said
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However, if you think we may have missed something, write to us PRIVATELY.
Or take it up with the individual PRIVATELY.  Jill, Lisa Rose and I are
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While we can't and won't do anything about things you receive in private
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5.  If you have questions, please read the FAQ.  It's at
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answers can be found there.

--sah




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: sah <romana@mindspring.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: ADMIN:  How to (un)subscribe
Date: 20 Oct 1998 13:42:08 -0400

Please SAVE this message-- it contains information on how to uns*bscribe
from the list or to change s*bscription options.

IF YOU'RE S*BSCRIBED TO THE REGULAR BUFFY LIST AND WISH TO CHANGE TO DIGEST:

You need to uns*bscribe from the Buffy list, and res*bscribe to the digest.

Send a message to majordomo@lists.xmission.com

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You'll go through the same approval process that you got when you subbed to
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THE BUFFY FICTION LIST

To s*bscribe to the Buffy Fiction list, follow the same procedures as
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(or buffy-digest, or buffyfic, or buffyfic-digest)





-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "J. Jericho Born" <traction@sirius.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Flies to Honey" (08/?) sequel to "The Necromancer"
Date: 20 Oct 1998 21:39:28 -0700

TITLE: "Flies to Honey" (Part 08/?)
AUTHOR: J. Jericho Born
E-MAIL: traction@sirius.com
FEEDBACK: Please let me know what you think of my fanfic with some feedback.
DISTRIBUTION: The author reserves rights on this story. Please do not
distribute without expressed permission.
RATING: PG-13  Contains violence.
SPOILERS: Spoilers to previous fanfic.
DESCRIPTION: The sequel to "The Necromancer". Abel is now unconcious, but
attracting vampires like flies to honey. Buffy is caught between protecting
her enemy and helping her friend Willow find her beloved Oz. Meanwhile, Willow
gets deeper into magic and the occult in order to find a way to restore Oz to
human form.
DISCLAIMER: The writer of this unauthorized fan fiction is not affiliated with
any of the parties involved in the making of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The
characters are the property of Joss Whedon and whomever else the lawyers may
deem fit, they are used without permission. Technically that is not legal, but
I'm not anticipating any law suits. This work, the plot line, and the
characters introduced that are not already featured on Buffy the Vampire
Slayer are the work of Joshua Jericho Born, Copyright 1998.


==============

Scene 7

"Are you sure Oz won't mind us borrowing his van?" quieried Cordelia from
behind her omnipresent sunglasses. She and Xander were snug in the back of the
aforementioned V.W. wagon, relishing the German proclivity toward comfort and
Oz's sense of exotic decor.

"Considering the fact that we're going to use it to rescue him from a life of
chasing cats and sniffing rears, I don't think he'll mind one bit," quipped
Xander. He surveyed the front of Buffy's house idly.

"Where did the Buffster go off to?" Xander asked curiously.

"Willow needed some help carrying some magic paraphenalia. They should be back
shortly," answered Giles, authoratively seated behind the vehicle's stearing
wheel.

"What do you think about Willow getting into the whole witch thing? I mean,
sure if you don't have that great of a social life you need something to pass
the time, but witchcraft? Whatever happend to collecting stamps or knitting?"
inquired Cordelia.

"Nothing better than a hobby straight from the Patridge Family to keep you
awake into the wee hours of the night," humorously commented Xander.

"Ok, so she could collect Backstreet Boys posters or something. But, you get
my point," appended Cordelia.

"I don't know if it's very healthy," replied Giles. He gazed out the
windshield thoughtfully and continued, "The black arts can be a slippery slope
into untold darkness. Perhaps encountering this necromancer has shown her what
evil lies at the arcane art's most extreme."

"Mr. Giles," called out Buffy's mother. The front driver's side window rolled
down swiftly at her greeting.

"Oh, hello, Joyce," responded Giles plesantly. 

"Now, Buffy already gave you her part of the motel money. Is there anything I
can give you towards food?" questioned mom.

"Don't worry about it, hopefully we won't be more than a day. We're all eager
to retrieve Oz and revel in his company once more," Giles explained. Buffy's
mother was hardly comforted; she didn't seem very pleased with this road trip
at all.

"Who would of thought Willow would be dating a werewolf. She seems like such a
nice girl," mom commented.

"I can assure you that Oz is quite a decent young man," said Giles.

"Of course," affirmed mom, she broke her pessimistic glare with a polite
smile. "Oh, here come Buffy and Willow now," mom said with a gesturing glance.

One could hardly make out the image of the duo of friends as they strolled up
the quiet Sunnydale street for they were practically buried in various bags,
boxes, and backpacks. Mom openend the van door for her daughter and friend,
their cargo threatening to eclipse its capacity.

"Whoa, what is all this stuff?" cried out Xander as he moved to make room.

"I wanted to be as prepared as I could," Willow said, tossing her heavy burden
onto the van floor.

"And them some," Buffy added while doing the same to her load.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "J. Jericho Born" <traction@sirius.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Flies to Honey" (09/?) sequel to "The Necromancer"
Date: 20 Oct 1998 21:40:31 -0700

TITLE: "Flies to Honey" (Part 09/?)
AUTHOR: J. Jericho Born
E-MAIL: traction@sirius.com
FEEDBACK: Please let me know what you think of my fanfic with some feedback.
DISTRIBUTION: The author reserves rights on this story. Please do not
distribute without expressed permission.
RATING: PG-13  Contains violence.
SPOILERS: Spoilers to previous fanfic.
DESCRIPTION: The sequel to "The Necromancer". Abel is now unconcious, but
attracting vampires like flies to honey. Buffy is caught between protecting
her enemy and helping her friend Willow find her beloved Oz. Meanwhile, Willow
gets deeper into magic and the occult in order to find a way to restore Oz to
human form.
DISCLAIMER: The writer of this unauthorized fan fiction is not affiliated with
any of the parties involved in the making of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The
characters are the property of Joss Whedon and whomever else the lawyers may
deem fit, they are used without permission. Technically that is not legal, but
I'm not anticipating any law suits. This work, the plot line, and the
characters introduced that are not already featured on Buffy the Vampire
Slayer are the work of Joshua Jericho Born, Copyright 1998.


==============

Scene 8

About an hour into the drive most casual conversation had been exhausted. What
was left entailed mostly intense window staring punctuated by brief moments of
thumb twiddling. The sleepy late afternoon sang Giles a lullabye while
sluggishness crept in and affected Giles' driving.

"I don't want to sound too mature, but do we have much of a plan?" Xander
asked of no one in particular. The question awoke most of the occupants of the
van, including Giles, which was fortunate because he finally noticed the sedan
that had been trying to pass him for the past half mile.

"What do you mean?" questioned Buffy.

"Finding him is the easy part, but what happens once we do find him? 'Here's a
milkbone, now be a good boy and don't be a werewolf anymore'?" Xander
wondered.

"Oh, don't worry, we can use that ritual that I discovered in Abel's dungeon.
Well, it's not really a ritual, it's more of a potion splattering," answered
Willow.

"You went through the necromancer's lair?" inquired Giles with a touch of
concern.

"Only to find out how to change Oz back," assured Willow.

"I thought you said you need hellfire for that ritual to work," Xander said,
slightly abashed.

"Yes, we do," replied Willow.

"Don't tell me you've attempted to summon hellfire," asked Giles, concern
mounting.

"No. . . well. . . I tried researching it, but there wasn't much written about
it; other than it's really nasty stuff," Willow conceded.

"Very nasty indeed. You must be very careful with your endeavors into the
black arts. Hellfire, the whole of necromancy for that matter, is a very
dangerous vocation. Legend has it that few survive learning to summon
hellfire, let alone wielding it," chastised Giles.

"Speaking of which, why is it that Abel had his hellflame backfire?" wondered
Buffy generally.

Giles zealously jumped to answering the question, "To be honest, I'm not
entirely sure. I have speculated in my head about it-" His speculations were
cut short.

"It's because he made himself able to feel," interrupted Willow. She explained
further, "When a necromancer artificially induces a sense of feeling he
becomes subceptable to his own hellfire."

"Where did you read that?" inquired Giles obstinately.

"In that book 'The Lost Art of Necromantics'," answered Willow.

"Oh," said Giles, proverbial tail between his legs.

"So where are we going to get hellfire other than eating something with a lot
of garlic?" questioned Cordelia.

"Even if Abel were capable of having an actual thought right now I don't think
he'd be too keen on giving us a helping hand," observed Xander.

"Well if he were awake, let's just pause for a moment to mention how we so do
not want that, then maybe we could set something up," Buffy offered.

"Yeah, all it takes is for Oz to be doused in a few reagents and hit with a
small blast of hellfire and he'll be cured. I'm the last one who would want
Abel up and running, but what if there's no other way," Willow speculated.

"Let's just worry about one thing at a time, shall we? We still need to find
Oz," reminded Giles.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "J. Jericho Born" <traction@sirius.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Flies to Honey" (10/?) sequel to "The Necromancer
Date: 20 Oct 1998 21:42:09 -0700

TITLE: "Flies to Honey" (Part 10/?)
AUTHOR: J. Jericho Born
E-MAIL: traction@sirius.com
FEEDBACK: Please let me know what you think of my fanfic with some feedback.
DISTRIBUTION: The author reserves rights on this story. Please do not
distribute without expressed permission.
RATING: PG-13  Contains violence.
SPOILERS: Spoilers to previous fanfic.
DESCRIPTION: The sequel to "The Necromancer". Abel is now unconcious, but
attracting vampires like flies to honey. Buffy is caught between protecting
her enemy and helping her friend Willow find her beloved Oz. Meanwhile, Willow
gets deeper into magic and the occult in order to find a way to restore Oz to
human form.
DISCLAIMER: The writer of this unauthorized fan fiction is not affiliated with
any of the parties involved in the making of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The
characters are the property of Joss Whedon and whomever else the lawyers may
deem fit, they are used without permission. Technically that is not legal, but
I'm not anticipating any law suits. This work, the plot line, and the
characters introduced that are not already featured on Buffy the Vampire
Slayer are the work of Joshua Jericho Born, Copyright 1998.


==============

Scene 9

"We're here," announced Giles after carefully parking in a rather crampt motel
lot with the dwindling dusk light and a few tacky neon signs as his only
sources of illumination.

"Finally," yawned Cordelia. "How about if I drive on the way back and cut down
on the travel time," she suggested.

"A good idea in all respects except one: I'm sure Oz would appreciate us
keeping his prized van in one piece," declined Giles, exiting the vehicle as
he spoke. He called out from over his shoulder, "Don't forget the luggage."

To Willow's dismay both Buffy and Cordelia began to leave the van, carrying
only their own relatively trivial cargo. She looked over the mass of items she
had brought with concern.

"Guys," pleaded Willow, "What about all of my stuff?"

"I think it's only fair if Cordy helped you out this time," reasoned Buffy.

"Please," rebuked Cordelia, "Just because Willow is trying to be miss voodoo
princess doesn't mean I have to do hard labor." Cordelia marched off after
Giles after her selfless declaration.

"Will, why don't you get Xander to help you out?" Buffy suggested. She, too,
went in the direction Giles had gone.

Slightly peeved, Willow leaned over to a snoozing Xander. She prepared her
most tender, helpless voice to beseech him with. After a moment's hesitation
she opted for another approach.

"Xander," Willow said with a couple well aimed pokes to the rib cage. Xander
shook himself from his sleep and fought to regain his bearings.

"Xander," reiterated Willow. She paused until she thought Xander was listening
to some degree and continued, "Giles said you should bring the luggage."
Without a moments delay, she scurried off to join the others.

Willow found the trio of Giles, Cordelia, and Buffy huddled outside their
potential lodgings. It was a rather disconcerting sight; dingy when applied to
the motel would be a complement. Broken windows, rotting doorframes, and grimy
exteriors were the best features of this establishment.

"Ok, Giles, now I know you don't want to waste money, but this is one too many
steps on the bad side of cheap," said a disgusted Cordelia.

"I was told these were the best accomodations in Weberton," said Giles in
reply.

"I hate to see what the bad places look like," commented Buffy.

"Yeah, I mean, this thing is a star short of being a one star hotel,"
criticised Cordelia.

"Weberton isn't the most affluent community in California," informed Willow.

"Well, let's go," sighed Giles. 

The group of slayerettes entered the check-in office warily. Behind the front
desk sat a man who looked like he frequented fast food establishments, clad
only in a cut-off undershirt and beaten-up khakis. A seemingly ancient
television set was his only company.

"Well look here, you must be the English guy who called," observed the front
desk clerk. He introduced, "My name is Eddie."

"Very nice to meet you, Mr. . . uh. . . Eddie," greeted Giles.

"And how are y'all doing this afternoon?" inquried Eddie with a working man's
charm.

"Fine, thank you," answered Giles.

"How about the classy ladies you got here, how are y'all doing?" Eddie asked
while addressing Buffy.

"Fine," simply replied Buffy.

"Just fine?" Eddie questioned further.

Buffy answered impudently, "Just fine." 

"Now if I remember right you needed two rooms for the evening," said Eddie,
speaking to Giles once again.

"That's correct," Giles affirmed.

"That'll be thirty-two dollars then," said Eddie. Giles pulled out his wallet
and stumbled through it to retrieve the desired amount. 

"For another twenty I'll make sure the cops don't come by tonight and do the
whole vice routine," offered Eddie.

Giles looked quite offended and replied angrily, "The only thing we'll be
doing in the middle of the night shall be sleeping."

"Of course, of course. This is a class establishment," agreed Eddie. "Speaking
of being a class establishment, all these gals are eighteen, right?" he
appended.

"That's of no concern of yours," chastied Giles, he placed a handful of cash
on the counter top.

"Ok, if you want to play it that way. Far as I know, jack, they're all legal,"
said Eddie as he handed over a few keys and a receipt.

"Thank you very much," said Giles with a touch of sarcasim. The four turned to
leave with a colorful first imppression of Weberton on their minds.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: ~Ripe Wicked Plum~ <lebo@gte.net>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: SpikeFic: It Won't Do (1/1)
Date: 21 Oct 1998 19:30:04 -0400

Title: It Won't Do
Author: ~Ripe Wicked Plum~ a.k.a. Goth Spike
E-mail: ripe_wicked_plum@hotmail.com
Feedback: "Fancy it, Pet?"
Distribution: Spike's Spike (if Sandycat wants it), Spike Girls. All
others please ask first.
Rating: PG
Summary: Spike hears a song and it reminds him of someone.
Spoilers: Up through "Anne"
Distribution: All things Buffy belong to the incredibly talented Joss
Whedon. Maybe he won't sue me. The song lyrics are from "Caramel" by
Suzanne Vega (off her Nine Objects of Desire album) I just borrowed it
to tell the story.

	The smoke hung, almost tangible, in the air of the bar. Spike brushed
the ashes off of a stool and sat down. He pulled out a cigarette and lit
it, as a new song began on the jukebox.
	He exhaled and saw her face hovering before him in the smoke. The
Slayer. He couldn't believe he was thinking about her. Again. She
plagued his every thought these days. Ever since their brief, but
essential, alliance, he hadn't been able to get her out of his mind. 

"It won't do
to dream of caramel,
to think of cinnamon
and long for you."

	He had scarcely made it out of town before Dru had come to. Before he
had a chance to stop her, she had flung the door open and jumped from
the car. She was dust before she ever hit the pavement. He had been
lucky. He had burned his hand a bit closing the door, but had gotten off
light. 
	He knew he should miss Dru, but he didn't. Maybe it was because she had
been unfaithful to him in their last few months together. Maybe it was
because he had learned to live without her. Maybe he was too busy
thinking about the Slayer to notice Dru was gone. He didn't know and
didn't really care, either.

"It won't do
to stir a deep desire, 
to fan a hidden fire
that can never burn true."

	He had found himself in Sunnyvale when the car had run out of gas. He
had locked all the doors and double-checked the windows before climbing
over the seat and stretching out in the back. He had hoped to wake up
from the nightmare that had become his life, but he couldn't even fall
asleep. 
	He kept replaying the scene over and over in his mind. He saw the
Slayer unarmed and backed against the wall with Angelus standing above
her, sword in hand. Spike knew he should have helped her. She had
trusted him and he had left her to die.
	He wasn't used to these feelings. He knew happiness. He knew rage. He
knew jealousy all too well, but these were new. Guilt. Remorse. Pity.
Mixed in there somewhere was admiration. He didn't know how, but she had
managed to win. 
	He had seen her earlier this evening at the bus depot. She had
purchased a ticket back to Sunnydale. He didn't even know that she had
left, yet he wasn't surprised to see her. Nothing about her surprised
him anymore. He had wanted to speak to her, but didn't know what to say.
She wasn't alone anyway, there was a girl with her. The taller girl
looked familiar to him, but he couldn't place her. She wasn't one of the
Slayer's usual companions. He followed them back to the tiny apartment
that Buffy now called home.
	He watched them enter the building and had almost followed them in, but
he just couldn't bring himself to do so. He couldn't face anyone yet,
especially not the Slayer. It was too soon. Instead, he had come to this
bar, hoping to lose himself in the crowd and drown his sorrows in a
glass.
	The bartender approached now, "What can I get you for?"
	"Black and Tan, if you've got it," Spike answered, taking another drag
off of his cigarette.
	"Comin' right up."

"I know your name,
I know your skin,
I know the way
these things begin;"

	"Here you go," the bartender said, sliding his drink to him. He turned
to leave, but hesitated, saying, "It's probably none of my business, but
I have to ask--"
	"Yes, it's a girl problem. No, it won't work out. No, you wouldn't
understand. If the drink comes along with brainless chatter, I'll take
my business elsewhere. Do I make myself clear, Mate?" Spike interrupted.
	"Crystal," was his only reply.
	Spike watched the short, balding man walk away. He knew that he had
been incredibly rude, but he just had no desire to spill his guts to a
complete stranger. He just wanted to be left alone. He stubbed his
cigarette out in the ashtray and took a swallow of his drink.
	He thought of her again. She looked different earlier. Sadder. Wiser.
Prettier. He wondered what had brought her here. Hadn't her friends
cleared her name with the police? Angelus and Dru had really messed
things up good. One of her friends was dead, though Spike couldn't
honestly say he was sad about it. The dark girl--Kendra. Was that her
name? Anyhow, she was a slayer. Had Dru not killed her, she would have
probably killed them. 
	He felt sorry for the Slayer, his Slayer, Buffy. It must have been very
difficult for her. Possibly the only person that knew what it was like
to be the Chosen One--how had there been two???--had been killed. Poor
Buffy. One friend was dead, others injured, her Watcher had been
tortured, and she had been forced to tell her mother about vampires--oh,
how he had hated that git. He understood why Buffy had waited so long to
fill her in. Maybe that was it. He would have wagered almost anything
that was the reason she left. Her mother. Fireworks must have flown
after he left her house.
	Poor Buffy. She must have had to kill Angelus, too. Even though he
wasn't the same guy she fell in love with, it couldn't have been easy.
Mortal emotions were like that. She probably blamed herself for him
losing his soul again. It must have been incredibly rough for her.
Slaying had to be hard enough, then factor in school, friends, family,
and a love life and you've got enough stress to crack a dam. He
understood why she had run away from it all.
	She was going home, though. All the things unsaid between them would be
left that way. All the thoughts he had yet to convey to her would still
be with him, festering inside his head. It was for the best, though. He
knew it. He didn't know what would happen if he ever shared his feelings
with her. It was probably best he never found out. What if she still
hated him? He couldn't bear to look in her eyes and see the thinly
veiled hatred again.

"But I don't know
how I would live with myself,
what I'd forgive of myself
if you don't go."

	Spike just wished that he could get her out of his mind. When he was
awake she was all he thought about. Even in slumber he wasn't safe. She
came to him in dreams. A loving, accepting Buffy. She held him and
cradled him, like he used to do for Dru. He kissed her and she loved
him. She didn't fight him, or pull away, when he fed from her.

"So goodbye,
sweet appetite,
no single bite
could satisfy..."

	Tomorrow, while he dreamt of her in such tender moments, she would be
on her way back to Sunnydale. He would wake alone and hungry, wishing he
had stopped her from leaving. Wishing he had been nicer to her all
along. It wouldn't be easy to forget about her, but he had to. There was
no future there. He was a vampire, she was the Slayer.
	As he sipped his drink, he began to think back to that night. He had
felt her heart race as the two of them walked along the streets of
Sunnydale. He had saw her cheeks flush when she caught him staring at
her. He had seen all the telltale signs of budding romance. Even when
she glared at him, there was a soft edge to it. 

"I know your name,
I know your skin,
I know the way
these things begin;"

	She was malleable, he knew it. He could change her mind. In time she
would accept him for what he was--crazy. She would never love him. He
was just lying to himself, imagining things that were never there. She
had looked to him for reassurance before she told her mother, though.
That one scared glance from her sad eyes had convinced him that she
didn't think of him as an enemy. Perhaps there was still hope for them
yet.

"But I don't know 
how I would live with myself,
what I would give of myself
if you don't go."

	He finished the last of his drink and stood up. Walking the length of
the bar he handed the bartender a ten dollar bill.
	"Keep the change, Mate. I'm sorry about earlier. It's been a rough
decade," he offered, stepping out of the door and into the night. 
	He found himself in front of the building he had seen the Slayer and
her companion enter. Spike looked up and saw the back of her little,
blonde head in a window. He lit another cigarette and exhaled the smoke,
sighing wearily. 
	"Goodbye, Buffy," he said, turning to walk away, the song from the bar
still playing in his head.

"It won't do
to dream of caramel,
to think of cinnamon
and long for you."


~Ripe Wicked Plum~ <--the brain just won't stop churning out ideas
lately...unfortunately I don't have enough hands to get all the ideas
out!!!
-- 
Goth Spike/ICQ=2607806/Member:Spike Girls(jury &
MommiesCouncil)/Spike4Sexiest/Spike's Minions/Spuffy/Spike's Sweeties
(#2)/SOOA[Major General (#5)]/I'm Spike's Ducks/ Spikemania(I cherish
Spike's chest)/Red Candy VP/Pres. and founder of the Leo is a Bloody
Whelp Club/Keeper of Spike's terms of endearment and his gloves/Guardian
of Spike's humanity, his amusement at Buffy's Hallowe'en costume, and
his ability to swallow his pride and help Buffy/Keeper of Dru's spiffy
wardrobe and her bruises/ Guardian of Dru's gothness and her fondness
for Rasputina.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: DaniLynn27@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: When You Least Expect It (1/3)
Date: 23 Oct 1998 23:15:56 EDT

TITLE: When You Least Expect It
AUTHOR: Danielle Loughlin (aka Prophecy Girl)
E-MAIL: DaniLynn27@aol.com
DISTRIBUTION: My site. All others, please ask. I'll say yes, I just like to
know where it's going.
RATING: PG-13 . .  language, smoochies. I stink at this rating stuff.
SPOILERS: Through Faith, Hope, & Trick
SUMMARY: A Buffy and Xander story. I'm trying to write various characters to
kind of expand my writing, so this is my attempt at that.
FEEDBACK: I'd love it!
DISCLAIMER: Buffy & Co. belong to Joss & Co. I'm just playing with them. No
copyright infringement intended. Also, "Full of Grace" belongs to Sarah
McLachlan.


Buffy and Xander sat at a table in the Bronze, both silently nursing their
drinks. Buffy stared off into space while Xander kept a careful eye on Willow
and Oz. 

Willow and Oz were on the dance floor, tightly entwined. Both of them were
oblivious to the fact that the fast music continued to pulse around them and
that dozens of dancing couples were moving across the floor. They were lost in
their own world, making with the smoochies. 

Xander sighed. Watching Willow and Oz only made him miss Cordy even more.
"Argh," he groaned to himself, wrenching his gaze away from the happy twosome.

"Huh? Did you say something?" Buffy said, snapping out of her dreamworld. 

"Kill me. Now," Xander said. 

"Oh come on, Xan," Buffy said. "It's not that bad. I know you miss her. But
Los Angeles isn't China. At least you still *have* her. Long distance
relationships can be a drag, but you two are perfect for each other. It'll
work out."

"Small problem with that, Buff," Xander said. "I don't have her anymore." He
handed Buffy the envelope that had arrived that morning in the mail and put
his head down on the table.

Buffy removed the letter from the envelope and began reading. Dear Xander, I
really don't know how to tell you this so I'm just going to tell you. I've
never been one for tact anyway. I met someone else.  . . . Oh. No wonder
Xander looked so crushed.

"I'm really sorry Xander," Buffy said softly, taking his hand and squeezing
it. He raised his head off the table and smiled wanly. 

"Thanks," he said. "But that doesn't make it hurt any less." He sighed. "I
suppose I should be used to it. My luck with girls is just . . nonexistent."

"That's not true," Buffy said, trying to keep him from depressing himself.
"It's not your fault they turned out to be praying mantises . . . and mummy
girls . . okay I'll shut up now." She sighed. "I shouldn't talk anyway."

"Still got Dead-Boy missage?"

"Can you not call him that?" Buffy asked.

"Geez," Xander replied. "Do you two like plan that response?"

Buffy just gave him a look. "Angel and I were over the second I stabbed him
with that sword," she said, her voice catching on the word 'stabbed'. "Even
when Willow brought him back, it wasn't the same. It'd never be the same. Too
many bad memories. The fairy tale was over."

This time it was Xander who squeezed Buffy's hand.

"It's probably good that he's gone," Buffy added. "Him being here would be . .
too hard. Too painful. At least Los Angeles is close. If I need him, he'll
come."

"Kinda weird isn't it?" Xander asked, jerking his head in Willow's direction.
I mean, first you hooked up with Angel. Then me and Cordy. Then finally Willow
and Oz. But now she's the only one of us still attached to someone. And we're
swimming in the sea of single again."

Buffy glanced at Willow and Oz, who were still kissing, only they'd moved off
the dance floor, opting for the comfort of a couch. "Yeah. I'm happy for her
though. Oz loves her. She deserves this."

"I guess," Xander said. 

"Is that disappointment I hear in your voice, Xander Harris?" Buffy asked. 

"No," Xander said. "It's nothing. Really. Dance." Xander grabbed Buffy's hand
and pulled her to her feet. "We're just sitting here totally depressing
ourselves. I say we get up and be footloose and fancy free."

Buffy grinned. "Lead the way."

*****

Later that evening, Buffy was walking home from the Bronze with Xander, making
sure he arrived safely, without incidence from vampires or other things that
went bump in the night.

"You know," Xander said. "I'm the man here, I should be walking *you* home.
Not the other way around."

"Xander. Have a zen moment. I'm the slayer. You, not so much. Deal," Buffy
said, laughing. 

Xander grinned. "Yeah. It's just my macho guy instincts. The whole 'Me Tarzan,
You Jane' mentality." He slung an arm around Buffy's shoulder. "Here, just let
me pretend that I'm being Protector Guy here. Looks better."

Buffy smiled. The two walked in comfortable silence until they reached the
Harris house.

"I'll walk you to the door," Buffy said. 

"You are so totally damaging my male ego," Xander replied. But he still hung
pretty close to the Slayer. He hopped up the porch steps and gallantly offered
Buffy a hand. "Wanna come in? We can put on that tacky movie about the slayer
that some guy named Joss Whedon made and laugh at it."

"Sounds good, but I really should patrol, do at least one sweep before I hit
the sack," Buffy said. "Rain check?"

"Yeah," Xander said. "I'll hold you to that. Niters Buff."

"Night, Xan," she replied. 

Xander leaned over and kissed Buffy quickly on the cheek before turning and
heading to his house. Buffy stood in stunned silence. Xander turned back
around quickly, realizing what he had done.

"Buffy, I'm sorry, it was a habit, you know, Cordy. I totally didn't mean
anything by it," he said trying to explain. 

"Yeah, it's fine, don't worry about it," Buffy said quickly. 

Buffy and Xander looked at each other, not quite sure what to do or say. 

"Xander -- "

"Buffy --" 

They laughed. "Ladies first," Xander said.

"Xander. I -- I . ." she trailed off. 

"Yeah, I know," Xander said. "Or I think I know . . . do I know?"

"You know," Buffy said. "I should uh, go."

"Yeah. I should uh, go in."

Neither one moved. "Um, for us to um, go, one of us actually has to get gone
here," Buffy said, taking a step closer. 

"Which would add to the whole gone thing," Xander said, stepping forward. 

"Xander . . "

"Shhh," he whispered, interrupting. Xander leaned over, softly kissed Buffy's
lips. He pulled away, looking for some reaction from the Slayer. 

She gave him a half-smile. "Never mind," she whispered. She reached up and
grabbed him behind the head and pulled him to her, kissing him. 

The kiss was soft at first, gentle. As the seconds ticked by it grew in
intensity and passion. She wound her fingers through his hair, he pulled her
close and held her tight. Their kisses got faster, more furious, then turned
long and sweet again. They were both breathless when they pulled apart. 

"Buffy . . " Xander whispered. 

She kissed him again, once. "I think I'll take my rain check now."

*****
Buffy and Xander lay on Xander's bed, exhausted after hours of kissing. Buffy
rolled onto her stomach, placing a hand on Xander's chest. Her hair was a
tangled mess and her shirt was half unbuttoned and slipping down her shoulder,
exposing pale skin. Xander's hair stuck in a million different directions.
He'd long taken off the sweater he'd been wearing and had just the plain white
T-shirt he wore underneath on. 

Buffy leaned down, kissed him again. "God, we gotta talk."

"No kidding," Xander said. "But can't we uh, kiss some more?"

Buffy gave in to a long lingering kiss. They pulled apart. Xander kept running
his fingers gently up and down her back, making her shiver. 

"What's happening to us, Buffy?"

"I don't know. I don't know if it's just teenage hormones running wild because
I miss Angel and you miss Cordy, or if it's . . . "

"More." Xander filled in. 

"What do you think?" Buffy said. "Should we just write this off as an angsty
hormone-y mistake? Or do we try to figure out if it's actually something?
Cause Xander, I honestly did not see this coming. You've always been . . just
Xander."

Xander seemed to think. "Well. I think you know you've never been 'just Buffy'
to me. Never will be. But I think after that whole Spring Fling mess I kinda
dealt with the fact that you weren't going to be 'my Buffy'. I didn't see this
coming either."

"Do you still want me to be yours?" Buffy said, wishing she could take it back
the second she said it. 

"I don't know," he replied. "Do you want to be mine?"

Buffy groaned and put her head down on Xander's chest. "I don't know what I
want. I'm so confused." She looked up again. "But I'll tell you what I do
know. I liked that kiss. Okay, those kisses. I liked them a lot."

"So did I," Xander said under his breath. "Damn so did I." Xander rolled over,
flipping their positions and trapping Buffy underneath him. "Okay, I know
you're Slayer girl and you can pretty much knock me off in a second if you
don't like it, but um, don't hurt me?"

"I don't want you off," Buffy whispered. "Kiss me. Just kiss me."

Xander was more than happy to oblige.

*****




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: DaniLynn27@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: When You Least Expect It (2/3)
Date: 23 Oct 1998 23:16:25 EDT

*See disclaimer in part one*

"Buffy!" 

The Slayer heard Willow calling her from across the hall. She'd been trying to
hide from Willow all morning, not quite sure how to face her, and deciding
whether or not she should admit she spent half the night making out with the
guy Willow'd been in love with for years. 

Buffy had finally left Xander's around 3 a.m last night. The only reason she'd
left at all was because they finally remembered Xander's mom wouldn't be too
crazy about Buffy sleeping over. Especially since Buffy and Xander's sleepover
had consisted of anything *but* sleep. Well, nothing happened, Buffy told
herself. This time. Oh god. Was she actually thinking about Xander in that
context? She was so confused. 

"Willow. Uh, hi!" Buffy said, pushing her way over. "Where have you been? I've
been looking for you all day."

"Um, I was discovering why Xander and Cordelia had liked the utility closet so
much," Willow said, blushing fiery red, her face matching her brilliant hair. 

"Willow!" Buffy grinned. "Things getting quite serious with you and Oz huh?"

"Oh yeah," Willow said. "It's great. Oz is great."

Maybe I could tell her, Buffy thought. She has Oz now. She's over Xander,
right? And remember how mad she was when Xander kept it a secret that he was
dating Cordy? Maybe I'd better tell her. 

"Hey, uh, Will, can I ask you something?" Buffy said. 

"Yeah, su -- Xander!" Willow said.

The tall boy caught up to Willow and Buffy. "Hey, Will. Buffy."

"Hi Xander," Buffy said, avoiding his eyes. 

"So, are we Bronzing it again tonight? Oz is playing," Willow said, her eyes
shining with pride at the fact that her boyfriend was in the band.

"Well, ah, I don't know," Buffy started. 

"Sure we are," Xander said, throwing a friendly arm over Buffy's shoulder.
Buffy tried to ignore the rate her heart had just started pounding at. "We
always Bronze it Thursday nights. Why would it be any different?"

"Cool," Willow said. "Oh, there's Oz. Bye guys!" The redhead darted away in
pursuit of her boyfriend.

"In here," Xander said under his breath. "Now." He backed Buffy into a nearby
classroom and, and after closing the door softly, hopped up on a desk. Buffy
stood a few feet away, in front of him. "Okay . . A  . . we don't act any
differently around Willow. There's no need for her to know until we figure out
what's going on with us."

Buffy opned her mouth to protest.

" . . and B," Xander continued, "I still don't have any idea what's going on
with us."

"Wait wait, back to A. Why don't we tell Willow? I don't want her to think we
kept something from her. Or have you already forgotten that little fiasco on
my birthday?" Buffy said, reminding Xander of Willow's angry words when she'd
caught Xander and Cordy kissing in the stacks. 

"No, I have not forgotten," Xander replied testily. "Look. That was
different."

"Oh really? How so? Because to me, it looks exactly the same. You hiding the
truth from Willow about another girl."

"It's not like that Buffy!" Xander said, a little too loudly. "You don't get
it."

"What, Xander? What don't I get? And tell me, why do you care so much about
what Willow thinks?"

"Because, she's Willow, Buffy, I don't know!" Xander tried to say, hopping off
the desk and stalking towards Buffy menacingly. 

Buffy sighed, putting up a hand on his chest to stop Xander, who looked like
he wanted to punch her. "Look, Xander, I'm sorry. I don't want to fight with
you."

Xander backed off. "I don't want to fight with you either. Okay. I'm confused.
You're confused. We're letting our feelings get the best of us. I say we step
back and think about it. But for now, we're friends. We act like friends in
front of Willow. Nothing changed."

"What about, not in front of Willow?" Buffy asked.

He paused. "Then we act like us. Two very confused teenagers who think they
may be falling for each other but they're not quite sure. And they're scared
and they don't want to wreck their friendship."

"I don't want to wreck our friendship either Xander," Buffy said. "Oh, deja
vu."

"Yeah, deja vu," Xander said bitterly. "You broke my heart that day Buffy."

"I know, Xander, I know," Buffy said, tears coming to her eyes. "If I'd known
we were going to end up like this . . . "

"Yeah," Xander said. "The inevitable cliffhanger. Will Xander finally get
Buffy? Tune in next week to find out." He picked up his backpack. "I'll see
you around." He headed for the door.

"Xander!"  Buffy said. She wasn't going to let him leave now. Not like this.
"Don't."

"Don't what, Buffy?" he asked, a tired, frustrated look in his eyes.

"Don't . . just don't," Buffy replied, stepping towards him and embracing him
in a fierce hug. She buried her head in the soft fabric of his shirt. Slowly,
tentatively, Xander's arms went around her. The passion of last night was
gone. Instead was a boy afraid of getting hurt again. "I'm not going to hurt
you Xander. Not on purpose. Not this time."

Xander visibly relaxed. He broke Buffy's embrace, holding her at arm's length.
"Don't promise anything, Buff. Love hurts," he said, simply. 

Is that what this is? Is this love? Buffy wondered. She had no idea. But she
had all the time in the world to find out.

She stood on her tiptoes, lifting her face to his. The anticipated kiss was
given. Soft, sweet. The passion of the night before was gone, replaced by a
kind of comforting tenderness. Although Buffy still felt tingles race through
her. Okay, not all the passion was gone.

The bell rang shrilly. Xander and Buffy broke apart reluctantly. "I've got
classes to um, not go to," Xander said.

"Me too. Although I really should go to history. Seeing as I haven't been
there since um, Halloween," Buffy added.

"Yeah," Xander said. "So . . see you in the library?"

"Library. Oh I forgot! I was supposed to check in with Giles before classes
started! I gotta go!" The Slayer grabbed her backpack and ran out of the room.

Xander watched her go, blonde hair flying behind her. He let out a breath he
hadn't realized he'd been holding. You got her, Harris. You finally got her.
The Slayer's finally woken up and seen the Bug Man. I should be happy. I
should be elated. I should be doing flying leaps through the halls. Buffy
Summers is interested in me! At last!

Then why was he so confused?

*****

"That's right, big boy, come and get it," Buffy said to the vampire stalking
in front of her. I really gotta thank Willow for that line, she thought. The
vampire charged. Buffy quickly flipped him to the ground and drove the stake
through his heart. 

She stood up, dusting dead vampire off her jacket. "Fifth one tonight. Must be
a blood delivery at the hospital."

"Not till the 18th," a voice said from behind her. Buffy spun around in
surprise.

"Angel?" Buffy said, bewildered. 

Angel stepped out from the shadows of the trees. He looked the same. Long
black coat. Spiky hair. Brooding look. 

"Angel," Buffy repeated. 

"Buffy," he said, approaching her. 

"What are you doing here?" Buffy asked, surprised. She hadn't really expected
to see him for a good while. Dammit. How am I supposed to put him behind me
when he keeps re-appearing?

"I came to see how you were doing," Angel said. "I . . I missed you."

"I missed you too," Buffy whispered. The effect Angel still had on her. It was
over, yet her knees still went weak and her pulse rate quickened and all she
wanted to do was kiss him. She stepped closer. 

"Buffy," Angel said hoarsely. It only took seconds for him to take her in his
arms and capture her lips in a kiss. 

Buffy responded, all thoughts vanishing from her head except those of her
former love.

*****
Xander watched in stunned silence from a distance. He'd wanted to surprise
Buffy. He hadn't planned on Buffy surprising him. Disappointment welled up
inside him as he watched Buffy wrap her arms around Angel's neck. 

Xander had made his decision that afternoon. He wanted to try things with
Buffy, give it a chance. He'd been so optimistic it was going to work he'd
gone out and bought Buffy a present, and written her a note. He was going to
leave it on her windowsill, along with a single tigerlily, for her to find
when she got back from patrolling.

What he hadn't expected was to spot Buffy and Angel obviously in major liplock
as he walked to the Summers house. All his hopes were dashed to the ground.
Can't compete with Dead Boy, he thought. Guy's dark, mysterious, brooding. And
for some reason Buffy found those features so attractive. Why can't she see
something I've got over Angel? I'm alive. Sunlight and me get along great.
Angrily, he threw the giftwrapped box and flower on the ground and turned
away, not wanting to see any more. 

He turned and stalked away, leaving his presents behind.




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: DaniLynn27@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: When You Least Expect It (3/3)
Date: 23 Oct 1998 23:16:44 EDT

*see disclaimer in part one*

As Buffy kissed Angel, her thoughts were going wild. What am I doing? It's
over! Images were flooding back to her memory. 

Dream on schoolgirl, your boyfriend's dead . . . . Hello, lover . . . You
can't do it. You can't kill me . . . You don't get it do you. It's not about
you. It's never about you. And you fall for it every single time! . . . Buffy,
what's going on? I don't remember . . . I love you . . . Buffy! A single cry
of pain. Angel reaching out to her. 

Buffy pulled back, breaking the kiss. "Angel, I can't, I can't." She stepped
backward, away from Angel. She looked up at him, unable to separate Angelus
from Angel. They were still one and the same in her mind. Angel looked at her
with eyes filled with the same pain and misery and regret she felt. She
couldn't stop the tears. "I can't. I can't do this. I can't be with you. We
decided this."

Buffy shook her head. She looked back over at Angel.

He was gone.

*****

Buffy left the park, shivering, still reeling from her encounter with Angel. A
piece of cardboard crunched under her foot as she stepped on it. She looked
down. A small box, it looked like a jewelry box, wrapped in a paper with a
night sky print. A single tiger lily, slightly crushed. And an envelope. An
envelope with her name on it. With familiar handwriting.

Buffy sank down to her knees. Oh no, she was thinking, frantically trying to
rip the envelope open. Please let him not have seen Angel and me. The envelope
tore apart and Buffy removed the single sheet of paper inside. She opened it
slowly, carefully.

Buffy -

I'm sitting here in the library writing this note to you. And I'm not sure
just what it is I want to tell you. I still feel so confused. But I managed to
figure out one thing. In this whole crazy mess, there's one thing I'm sure of.
And that's you. I never stopped loving you Buffy. I think you know that. And
now I'm taking the risk all over again. I still want to dance with you. Be
with you. Maybe something that's making me feel a little better this time
around is knowing that you just might feel the same way too. It's no blind
leap this time. At least, I hope it's not. Because you mean so much to me. So
much I can't even put it all into words unless you want a novel instead of a
note. To steal a line from a movie (cause I'm really no good at these touchy-
feeley things) . . you complete me. The second I first spoke to you (and what
words those were . . "Hi. Xander. .  is, is me") I knew you filled a part of
me I didn't even know was empty. I can't imagine my life without you in it.
Those three months when you were gone, I was distraught. I was so scared I'd
never see you again. And I don't think I could deal with that. So here I am
again. Putting my heart on the line. Buffy. I wish I was saying this in
person. I love you. I always have. I always will. Please say you feel the same
way. 

                                                                              
Xander

Buffy closed the note and clutched it to her chest. She was crying again.
Xander had written all this to her, and then he'd seen her kissing someone
else. And she hadn't even wanted to be kissing Angel. It had just happened.
She had to make it right. She refused to lose him. She dropped the gift box
and letter into her bag and picked up the flower and took off running toward
the Harris house.

*****

Xander lay on his bed, aimlessly flipping through TV channels, not really
paying attention to what was on. The sound was on mute, and he'd put on the
most depressing song he could think of. It wasn't even his CD, it was Cordy's.
She'd left it in his room one day and he'd found it after she moved. 

The winter here is cold . . and bitter . . it's chilled us to the bone . . we
haven't seen the sun for weeks . . too long too far from home  . . feels just
like I'm sinking . . and I claw for solid ground . . . I'm pulled down by the
undertow . . I never thought I could feel so low . . and oh darkness I feel
like letting go . . 

The song matched his mood exactly. He was tired of being Buffy's puppet,
having his strings pulled whenever she wanted. He wasn't going to do it
anymore. He wasn't going to let her hurt him anymore. He was letting go. Of
Buffy. 

A soft thud startled him out of his thoughts. He jerked his head around.
"Geez, Buff. So nice of you to drop in. People do use doors these days."

Buffy stepped away from the window she'd just climbed in. "Xander . please,
just let me explain. . . "

"No, Buffy," he cut in. "There's nothing to explain. You were bored and lonely
with Angel gone, and I was conveniently there. So you decided okay, let's play
with Xander's heartstrings a little, make him actually think he had a chance.
So you do, and I do, and then one day good ol' Dead Boy comes riding back into
town and snaps his fingers and the little vampire slayer goes running, leaving
Xander behind in the dust. I get it Buffy. I can't compete with Prince of
Darkness here. I'll just wave the white flag. It was fun while it lasted,
Buffy. I'll send you a wedding present."

"No," Buffy said. "You let me talk, Xander Harris, before you completely go
off and running and coming to the wrong conclusions."

"I think you mean the right conclusions."

"No, I mean the wrong ones! If you'd stayed two minutes longer you would have
seen me say no to Angel. It's over between me and him, Xander. I'm so sorry
you saw what you did. It isn't going to happen again. I said no. I don't want
to be with him anymore. That kiss tonight just made me realize that. Angel is
my past."

Xander was silent.

"And you're my present. And I hope, my future," Buffy finished. "I found your
note."

Xander looked at her. "Well, I don't mean anything I wrote anymore."

Buffy felt tears fill her eyes. "I hope you don't really mean that," she
whispered.

"Yeah, well why?"

"Because I came over here to tell you I love you too," she told him. "I just
figured it out." She was surprised at how easy the words were to say. It felt
so right. Maybe she'd always loved him. 

"Do you really mean that? Because I can't stand having my heart broken by you
one more time," Xander said, sitting up. "There's not much heart left to
break." 

"I mean it more than anything," Buffy said, quickly crossing the few steps
between her and Xander's bed. She climbed up onto the bed to sit next to him.
She placed her hand on his cheek, moving his face so she could look at him in
the eyes. His eyes looked so full of pain, so sad. But they also held a
flicker of hope. "I love you, Xander."

"I love you," he replied, his voice so low it was almost a whisper, and he
pulled Buffy close and into a long, sweet, tender kiss. She kissed him back,
happily, relishing the taste of his warm lips on hers. He pulled away for a
second, resting his forehead on hers. "Do I really have you?"

"Forever," she whispered.

"Funny you should say that," Xander said.

"Why?"

"Did you open the box?" Xander asked. Buffy shook her head. "Open it."

She reached for the gift box and quickly removed the wrapping paper. "Nice
wrapping job," she commented, noting the wrinkles and the single piece of
tape. 

"Gift wrap boy I am not," he said, grinning.

She opened the small white jewelry box. Inside was a delicate silver chain
with a pendant in the shape of a broken star attached to it. It had an
inscription. "Buf . . Xan . . Fore . . "

Xander reached under his shirt and pulled out a thicker silver chain with the
other half of the pendant on it. Buffy reached for it and read the other half
of the inscription. "Fy . . Der . . Ever". She grinned. Typical Xander
present. But she loved it.

"I picked the star because I used to wish upon a star that one day you'd be
mine," Xander explained. "And the flower . . tigerlily reminds me of you.
Strong, mysterious, delicate . . beautiful."

"I love it, Xander. I love everything," Buffy said. "I love you," she said,
with extra emphasis on the you. She leaned forward and kissed him. She sat
back for a minute, a half-smile on her face. 

"You're doing that half-smile thing that the guys love," Xander pointed out to
her. 

Buffy slapped him lightly. "I'm not doing anything!" She was silent a few
seconds longer.

Xander reached for her hand. "What are you thinking about?"

"You. Me. Us. I'm still kind of in shock. It all happened so fast."

"Does that mean it's wrong?"

"No," Buffy said slowly. "I think this is the most right thing I've ever done.
Well, besides saving the world . . three times."

"Bragger."

Buffy stuck her tongue out at him, making him laugh. "Cretin."

"Slut."

"Immature."

"Runaway."

"Dorkface."

Buffy and Xander grinned at each other. Buffy leaned back against Xander, and
he wrapped his arms around her. They leaned back on the bed, settling against
the pillows to watch the late-late-late movie. Together. 

The End
(although this story just screams sequel . . gotta deal with Willow finding
out, and what happened to Angel . . I'm working on it!)



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: taygeta@juno.com (C. Catherine)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Chronicles (29/?)
Date: 23 Oct 1998 18:40:44 -0700

TITLE: Chronicles of the White Knight #29 Death and Destiny
AUTHOR: Taygeta
E-MAIL: taygeta@juno.com
FEEDBACK:  Criticism muchly welcomed!  (Bad or good...whatever the
complaint).  
DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just tell me first.
RATING: PG
KEYWORDS: Buffy/Xander fanfic
DISCLAIMER:  The characters portrayed in this fanfic and any such
reference to Buffy the Vampire Slayer television series belong to their
creator, Joss Whedon, and their owners, Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui
Productions, Sanddollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox. In other
words, they do not belong to me.  Copyright infringement not intended.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Chronicles of the White Knight
#29 Death and Destiny
By: Taygeta

The room was engulfed in darkness as his conscious crept out of the black
sea it had lay in for hours on end.  Xander's weak, tired eyes opened
groggily as the sedative faded slowly away and the pain of his beaten
body came surging throughout him.  He let out a loud cry as he
immediately clutched his cast covered right leg.

"God!  Somebody help me!" he screamed and a nurse and doctor immediately
ran into the room.

"Calm down, Mr. Harris, calm down," the doctor said gently as the nurse
handed her a filled syringe.  She calmly punctured his skin with a quick
thrust of a thin, silver needle, "There.  You're going to be just fine…"

The tranquilizer was strong and its effects came even more quickly than
the pain had.  Xander's shuddering form fell back down against the bed
and his eyes grew weary as the pain receded and before the black came to
swallow him whole again, he turned to see a white envelope with his name
written in familiar script - Buffy's.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 The ivy-walled edifice looked ancient and worn beneath the moonlight and
Buffy wondered what it had looked like in its prime.  Xander had taken
her to look at this mansion once when they walked by it during patrol,
said something about it belonging to a Havisham who died a few decades
ago.  Now, years later, still prevailed by death, it stood representing
age and decay.

The huge black gate creaked when she pushed it open and walked in, the
gate slamming loudly behind her.  As her shoes hit the concrete pavement
she wondered if it was all a trick - if Druscilla, Spike, and Angelus
would all be there to gang up on her - but she took a deep breath and
realized that it would never be like that.  Angelus would never *let* it
be like that.  In his eyes, she was the ultimate killing prize, to be
shared by no one and realizing this, Buffy's apprehension grew stronger.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"What do you think she's doing right now?" Cordelia asked glancing at
Willow.

"I don't know…I'm not sure I want to know," she replied honestly as she
looked up from her book, "I hope that whatever it is, it involves her
staying alive."

"Yeah…me too."

The redhead looked at her in surprise, "Really?"
"What do you take me for, Willow?  The Wicked Witch of the West?" Cordy
asked and then paused, "On second thought, don't answer that."

She laughed, "No, of course I don't, it's just that, you've never really
liked Buffy."

"Well, I don't," she said, "Sort of…at least, I don't want her to die. 
She's too important - not to me - but to Xander."

"You really do love him, don't you?" 

"Yeah, he's the first guy I *really* cared about.  I mean, all the other
guys, it was always that they had a car or money or whatever, but with
Xander it was different.  He didn't have a car - he had his mom's car -
and he didn't have money or a great fashion sense,  but for some reason,
that didn't matter."

"Are you still - "

Cordelia shook her head softly and smiled as she looked at the magazine
on her lap, "No, the reality of Buffy and Xander kind of kicked in."  She
paused and then glanced at Willow, "But, right now, if the remote
impossibility that he would fall in love with me were to occur?  I'd stop
lying to myself, and everyone else, that I wasn't."

Before Willow could reply, Giles entered the library, "You two should get
home and get some sleep."

"Sleep, Giles?" Willow aksed, "Not sleeping is why we came here.  I
couldn't sleep if I tried.  On one hand, I'm worried about Xander and on
the other hand, I'm worried about Buffy."

"Why is it that we let these two run rampant in our lives?" Cordelia
asked returning to her usual demeanor, "Oh…right…I forgot, they're our
friends.  You know, this part of the whole friendship thing, sucks!"

"Agreed," said Giles nodding, "But in consolation, you know that they'll
do the same for you."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Did you decide to come to play, Buffy?" Druscilla asked with her
humanoid face.

 "Hello, Druscilla," the slayer responded with a stake in hand,
"Play…yup, that's the motive."

"Spike, Buffy's come to play," the feminine vampire said as the
counterpart rolled into the room.

"But not with you, pet," he responded as he patted the hand that rested
on the armrest of his chair.

She pulled her hand away and smiled as she approached the figure in the
shadow, "Angelus, can't I have her instead? 

"Over Angel's ashes, maybe," muttered Spike has he began rolling away
with a sigh.

"Dru, go away," Buffy responded bluntly, "I kind of like to get this over
with."

"Angel…"

"Dru, go away," he reiterated.

With an angry pout, she did as commanded.

"So, this is it," Buffy said as he walked out of the shadow he had been
in, "The end."

"You mean, your end," he replied holding two swords in the air and
tossing one at her, "Catch."

She grasp the sword's handle tightly and said, "We'll just see about
that.  Fair's fair, remember?"

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

The metals clashed loudly, the sound echoing in the large ruined room.  

"I see you haven't lost your touch," he said.

Buffy instantly thought of a training session she had had with Angel a
long time ago, that dealt with her putting a sword to his neck, and she
reponded, "And I see you haven't lost yours.  Let's just hope that this
time, beheading is into play."

"You know what?" he said as tried to jab her side and missed, "Let's just
not."

She breathed heavily and remembered when last she heard those very words.
 Xander.   The day before she died.  Xander, who was lying in that
hospital bed because of Angelus.  Xander, who had saved her life and who
she had shunned so many times.  She broke his heart then as she broke his
heart nearly a month ago, but in a month ago's time, she wasn't in
control…Angelus was.

New found antagonism rose from her as she attacked Angelus and their
swords clashed once again.  Left…right…her arm swung the sword against
his counter attack

"So how's your boy toy?" he asked snidely as he thrust his sword at her
stomach and she jumped back onto a stone bench.

"Alive."

Angelus laughed, "Too bad, figured I left him for dead."

"Enough with the chitchat, she said angrily, "Let's get this over with."

"If you say so, lover," he responded and the tried to ram the sword near
her heart.

Buffy moved out of the way and her left arm caught the blade, which
seared the fabric of her shirt and the skin beneath.  The red blood
dripped from the wound and stained the white fabric.

He smelled the air and grin, "Ah, the smell of the sweetest of wines."

She gritted her teeth and tried to ignore the buring sensations that
resonated from the deep wound.  Taking a deep breath, she glanced at the
sword with eyes glazed with hope and gripped its handle tightly.

CLANG.  It began again.  The tension was at a high and continued to mount
with every passing second until suddenly it happened.  The cold steel
broke into skin that survived centuries of torment and punctured - tore -
the core of vampiric life, so that with one fell swoop, immortality long
obtained, was gone.   So that with one last gasp, the ashes fell to the
floor, and evil's destiny was fulfilled.

Exhausted, heavyhearted, she fell to her knees and there was a crash as
metal hit cement when she relinquished the damaging weapon from her
grasp.  Falling upon the last remnants of Angelus, the sword, which bound
him to his ultimate death, was covered until there was almost a sheath of
ash over it.  He was gone…there was nothing left to it but that.  And
when the sword pierced his heart, all that had been, was not, and
Angelus, Angel, and her Angel gone with it.  

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"She killed him…didn't know she had it in her," Spike said when he saw
him crumble into dust.

"So, she dies," Dru said simply as she saw the sun beginning to rise up
ahead, "When she least expects it, I will come and I will kill her."

He looked at her resilent expression and sighed before rolling away into
the shadows of the archaic structure.  Druscilla had always been in love
with Angel and for those centuries in which it had only been she and he,
she had never left that state of mind and heart.  Sadly, he realized that
it would always be that way, and that that love would mean his
Druscilla's end, and therein laid his own fate.





___________________________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Pallia3963@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Chandrea 2/?
Date: 26 Oct 1998 23:24:44 EST

TITLE: Chandrea 2/?
AUTHOR: Pallia (Blu) Kennelly
EMAIL: Pallia3963@aol.com
DISCLAIMER: I am, in no way whatsoever, associated with Joss Whedon and al=
l
the
people that make BtVS possible. That doesn't mean I don't wish I was,
though...
DISTRIBUTION: My site (http://members.delphi.com/pallia/index.html), but i=
f
you
want it, just let me know.
CONTENT: PG-13 They'll be some...cheerful...language later, and perhaps so=
me
sexual innuendo.
SPOILERS: All the way up to Reptile Boy (2nd season)
SUMMARY: Buffy's dead, and there's a new Slayer in town...and she brings b=
ad
tidings to Sunnyvale!
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Thank you, Happy, Darcie and Mary, for persuading me to wri=
te
more and more!


Chandrea 2/?
by Pallia/Blu

"Okay, it's official," Chandrea said as she and Willow walked out of class=
. "I
am now completely and totally confused. The chaos theory is so fricking
*hard*! I can't understand how you find it so simple! You must be a super-
genius!"

"I've been working on it for a while, remember? But what about your old ma=
th
class? Did you at least start on it?"

"No, we were going over polar equations again. A lot of people forgot how =
they
worked. We were going to do the chaos theory later."

Chandrea stopped in front of her locker. "Hold on. I have to put my math b=
ook
away and get my keys out. I am *so* glad Snyder let me have off-campus lun=
ch."

"He *let* you have off-campus lunch? How? What'd you do? Threaten you with
bodily harm or something?"

Chandrea laughed. "No, I'm just a special circumstance. I live by myself, =
and
I told him I need to go home during lunch to feed my grem...ah, my cats. I=
t's
not entirely true, but he doesn't need to know that."

"You live by yourself? What happened to your parents? Did you emancipate
yourself from them?"

"No, not exactly. They were killed not all that long ago, and I won the ri=
ght
from the courts to live by myself. I was deemed =91responsible enough to p=
rovide
for myself. I've been =91providing' for myself for most of my life. It amu=
ses me
that it took a court to make it legal."

"So you went through your parents death, a court battle over you, and now =
you
move to *this* town. Don't you feel a little...pressured?"

Chandrea shrugged. "Yeah, but I've been under pressure for most of my life=
.
I've gotten used to it." < It was either that or go mad. > She shut her
locker, and was about to say more when someone called her name.

"Chan! Over here!" Chandrea looked towards the direction of the voice. Whe=
n
she saw the person calling her, she grinned and shouted back, "How many ti=
mes
do I have to tell you, stupid? It's *Drea*! Get your sorry butt over here =
so I
can kick it like I told you I would if you ever called me that again!"

A tall, grinning guy pushed his way through the crowd. He got to Chandrea'=
s
side, and immediately fell to his knees. He looked up pleadingly at her. "=
Oh
please, fair maiden, I beg of you not to damage my unworthy a--"

"Enough!" Chandrea laughed. "Get up. You look idiotic, kneeling there on t=
he
floor." 
He bounced up. Chandrea turned to Willow. "He's absolutely impossible. And=
 do
you have any idea who he is?"

"Well, I know his name is Ryan, but that's about it."

"Ah! Well, then, Willow, let me cordially introduce you to Ryan Nakken, my
physics lab partner--"

"I was gracious enough to let her join me," Ryan interrupted, grinning.

Chandrea glared at him. "That's because you were the only reject *without*=
 a
partner. Now, like I was saying, this is Ryan, my lab partner, and the clo=
wn
that's in my first four classes. *Much* to my dismay," she added, grinning=
 at
him.

"First four?" Willow asked, frowning. "He isn't in our math class, is he?"

"Nope. But we've both got zero-period. It's a drag, but I couldn't decide =
if I
wanted to take computers or band. So I chose both."

"I see. What's your zero-period?" Willow asked, curious.

"Physics," Chandrea said. She made a face. "Physics early in the morning i=
s
not *my* idea of fun, but it was the only zero-period with seats left in i=
t.
So I got stuck with it."

"And you got stuck with him, too," Willow said, smiling impishly at Ryan. =
"How
much you must suffer!"

Chandrea smirked. "You read my mind." She looked at her ring watch. "Hmph.=
 I
need to go. God, how I hate going anywhere by myself. < Even on patrol...t=
he
buddy system is a wonderful thing! > 

Ryan slung an arm around her shoulders. "Then take us with you!" 

Chandrea poked him. "Duh, Ryan. This isn't exactly an off-campus lunch sch=
ool!
Snyder would have our heads!"

"He would have*our* heads, Ryan said as he pointed to Willow and himself "=
if
we did that by ourselves. But *you*, the precious extraordinary student *w=
ith*
us, we won't get in trouble. Snyder adores you."

Chandrea made another face. "Eewww. I'm adored by an impotent, bald little
Nazi man. I feel all icky!"

Willow giggled. "Impotent, bald little Nazi man? Where'd you get that?"

"Cordelia. I heard her talking about Snyder to a bunch of her little frien=
ds.
Are they all as snobby as her?"

"Yeah. Harmony's usually pretty worse."

"Harmony. What a weird name. Do you suppose her parents were hippies?"

Ryan snickered. "Probably. She has that airheaded way about her that peopl=
e
get from their druggie parents."

Chandrea rolled her eyes. "Where *do* you get your logic, boy? You don't
inherit airheadedness from druggie parents. Drugs have nothing to do with =
it.
It's just the way you want to act. And I'm beginning to wonder: how did we=
 get
on the subject of airheadedness, anyway? Never mind," she said as Ryan ope=
ned
his mouth to reply "I don't want to know. Or remember. Whatever. You guys
gonna come along with me or what?"

Ryan grinned. "Finally you come to the point. Yes, I accept your kind
invitation."

Chandrea poked him. "Hush. And get your arm off me. It's been there far to=
o
long."

He removed the arm, looking insulted. Chandrea looked aggrieved. "Oh, for =
the
love of-- never mind. Willow, come? Please? Don't leave me alone with...hi=
m."

Willow looked as if she was having a minor crisis. "Well,
I...yes--wait...no--maybe...oh, Xander!" she said, the last word coming ou=
t
almost as a shout.

Ryan and Chandrea appeared decidedly confused for a moment. Chandrea spoke
first.. "Um...I see. Could you make any less sense, Willow? Did you want
Xander to come with us?"

"Uh...yeah?"

"And where would he be? We can't take him if we can't find him."

"We usually meet in the cafeteria. It's like a tradition thing. Or at leas=
t it
used to be. Me, Xander, Buf--" Willow broke off, eyes filling with tears.

Chandrea bit her lip. She had an idea of what Willow was going to say.
"Buffy?" she asked softly. Willow nodded, eyes threatening to spill over.

< Buffy...the previous Slayer. Does Willow know how she died? Well, I
certainly can't ask her about it now. Wouldn't be a good idea. From the wa=
y
she's looking now, she just might burst into tears. I hate when people cry=
. Am
I Miss Insensitive or what? >

Ryan looked extremely uncomfortable. "Xander? Remember him? Can we go find=
 him
now? Please?"

< Men. > Chandrea sighed mentally. "Sure, let's go find Xander. Just one
question. Where's the cafeteria?"

Glad to have a distraction, Willow started forward. "This way."

Chandrea and Ryan followed her. "How'd you know about Buffy?" Ryan asked
quietly, making sure Willow couldn't hear. "She died before you came."

"Didn't I tell you that I lived in LA before I came here? At home, Buffy w=
as
still a legend for burning down her school gym."

"She did *what*?"

"Don't tell me you hadn't heard about it. News that like usually travels
pretty fast."

"No, actually, I hadn't heard it. Why'd she do it anyway?"

"I'm not sure. Some say she was some sort of pyromaniac, others say she wa=
s a
psycho." < And still others know the truth...she burned it down to kill
vampires. >

"She sure didn't act psycho. Snyder was of another opinion on that, though=
."

"He would be," Chandrea muttered. "Hey, is this the cafeteria? Or is it ju=
st
some other place where mass amounts of people gather to eat?" She looked
around. It was very loud, and full of strange, new people. < Scary. > Chan=
drea
shuddered. < Well, at least none of them are vampires. But they could be
werewolves and demons and chupacabras and snake-people and...well, I'm sur=
e I
get the idea now. >

Willow disappeared into the crowd, and a minute or two later, she reappear=
ed
with Xander.

"Are we ready now?" Chandrea asked. "I need food."

They all nodded. Chandrea smiled. "Good." She turned around and pushed her=
 way
through the crowd. She finally got out into the hall.  Chandrea stopped an=
d
checked to see if the little group was still behind her. They were still
caught in the crowd, so she waited for them to catch up. She saw Ryan firs=
t.

"I call shotgun," he told her. Chandrea shrugged.

"Makes no difference to me," she said. "But don't you dare fight over it."

Ryan saluted her. "Yes, ma'am!" Chandrea chuckled.

Willow and Xander appeared. "Ryan called shotgun," she told them. "No figh=
ting
whatsoever about it. If you do, you don't go. Got it?" 

Looking slightly intimidated, Willow and Xander meekly nodded.

"Madam runs a tight ship!" Ryan said jokingly.

"Madam has learned a tight ship is the only way to run a ship. Now, move o=
ut
of my way. I don't want to waste any more time than we already have." Chan=
drea
ever so politely shoved Ryan and Xander out of the way.

To be continued...

Like it? Yes, no, maybe? Either way, let me know!




-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: ~Ripe Wicked Plum~ <lebo@gte.net>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: SpikeFic: Pyramid Scheme (1/1)
Date: 27 Oct 1998 01:56:46 -0500

Title: Pyramid Scheme
Author: ~Ripe Wicked Plum~ a.k.a. Goth Spike
E-mail: ripe_wicked_plum@hotmail.com
Distribution: Spike's Spike (if Sandycat wants it), Spike Girls. All
others please ask first.
Rating: PG-14 (MILD language, violence)
Spoilers: none...this doesn't fall within the Buffy scheme. Dru is
strong, but Spike isn't in a wheelchair. Dalton is still alive, too.
Summary: Spike has to make a big decision.
Disclaimer: All things Buffy belong to Joss. I just borrow them to add
Spike...er, spice to my life.
Note: This fic comes in response to Ironic Spike's challenge to start a
fic 
with "I 'ave to get t' the cemetery before she sacrifices_____"

        "I 'ave to get t' the cemetery before she sacrifices that stupid
boy," Spike said, hopping into his car.
        He pulled away, tires squealing, leaving a bewildered Dalton in
the driveway. 
        "I thought you would be happy!" he yelled at the back of the
car.
        Spike saw the confusion on the vampire's face, but he didn't
have time to explain, nor did he want to. He wasn't sure he understood 
what was going on, let alone how to explain it to someone else. 
        He wasn't far from the graveyard, but that five-minute drive had
to be one of the longest in his life. He saw the light ahead change to 
red and he floored it, speeding through the intersection.
        "Yeah, honk, that's really gonna make me rethink my actions.
Bloody idiots," he said, hearing the blaring horns of his fellow
drivers.
        He whipped around the corner and onto a field across from the
cemetery. He flung the car door open and took off running, hopping over 
a wall. Dalton said the ritual was Egyptian, so she would need a symbol 
of its heritage. He leapt over headstones and dodged low tree limbs, 
heading for the pyramid he had seen. He couldn't remember exactly where 
it was. He cursed himself silently for not paying more attention to
detail. 
        He tripped over a tree root and stumbled into a clearing.
Looking up from the ground, he saw the top of the stone monument. 

        Xander stood, tied naked to the pyramid, begging for his life,
"Come on, guys. You don't want my blood. I eat all sorts of junk food. 
Cheesy chips and doughnuts flow through my veins. The cholesterol will 
kill you!"
        "Gag 'im," Drusilla said to three vampires who stood nearby.
"'Is voice is an affront to the gods and it 'urts Miss Edith's ears."
        She sat her doll down and picked up the translation Dalton had
given her. She studied it and lit incense, readying for the ritual. Her 
face was darkened with clay, her lips stained with berries, and lines 
drawn out from her eyes. She glanced at the words of the ritual again 
before saying them aloud.
        "Osiris, god of the lower world, judge of the dead, please 'ear
my cries. I call on you and your sister-wife, Isis, goddess of
fertility.
Please grant my request. Receive my offering of this virgin. May 'is
blood--" 
        Spike knocked her down, interrupting the invocation. She
shrieked as she landed in a fresh grave.
        "You got my dress all dirty!" she said, charging him. 
        Spike sidestepped her advance and she crashed to the ground
again, yelling to the minions for help.
        They hesitated for a moment before attacking. They all feared
him, but they finally decided that there were enough of them to take him 
down without too much of a struggle. Two of them approached him from
behind
while a third kept him occupied from the front. The three of them and
Dru were too much for him to handle on his own. They wrestled him to the
ground and bound him with rope, tying him up next to Xander. She sent
the other vampires away after making sure his bonds were secure.
        "Bad Spike. You've been very naughty. Now I 'ave t' tie you up
and you can't join in the fun. You can watch, though. Then we can go
'ome 
and 'ave a party. Mummy will forget all about 'er little Spike tryin' t'
ruin all the fun," Dru said, rubbing his chest.
        "Pet, I wasn't tryin' to ruin your fun. It's just not a good
idea to kill one of the Slayer's mates. She'll kill--" he said before
she interrupted him.
        "Shhhhhh. You must be quiet or Mummy will 'ave t' gag you. Miss
Edith says you mustn't talk because the gods won't listen to a man. 
They'll only listen to Princess. They're a lot like us, Spike. Brother
and
sister. 'Usband and wife. Not dead and not alive. They'll understand us.
They'll give me what I want. You'll see. We'll be a 'appy family. Then
you won't care about the Slayer anymore."
        She kissed him and then skipped away, casting a glance upwards.
The moon hung, low and full, in the night sky. Drusilla stepped over to
Xander and stroked his face. He tried to pull away, but couldn't. She
took a few paces away from the pyramid and began her chant again.
        "Osiris, god of the lower world, judge of the dead, please 'ear
my cries. I call on you and your sister-wife, Isis, goddess of
fertility.
Please grant my request. Receive my offering of this virgin. May 'is
blood spill onto the ground and appease you. Osiris, I ask that you
judge me worthy. I am one of your children. A child of the lower world.
One of the living dead. In darkness may you reign. May my offering of
the virgin make me worthy. Isis, mother of us all, I ask that you bless
me. I beg for you to give me your gift, the gift that 'as been taken
from my kind. I invoke you to give me a child. From the blood of the
virgin may I be made fertile," she said, slashing Xander's bare chest.
        "Not so fast, PsychoGirl," spoke a voice from behind her.
        Drusilla whipped her head around and saw Buffy. She charged the
petite
blonde and was almost met with the pointy end of a stake. 
        "No!" Spike screamed, causing Buffy to turn in his direction.
        Drusilla took advantage of the opportunity to run away, leaving
Spike
tied to the pyramid.
        Buffy headed over to him, saying, "So, you guys thought you
could have
a
little feast on one of my friends and I wouldn't care, huh? Well, you're
wrong."
        She pulled the stake back and stopped when she heard Xander.
        "Mmmmmmf mmfmmmff" he screamed around the gag.
        Buffy stepped over in front of him and giggled, "That's a new
look for you, Xan."
        She removed the gag and he sputtered, "Buffy, thank goodness you
showed up! Untie me, will ya? It's drafty out here."
        She untied him and he quickly covered himself. Buffy tossed him
her coat and then stepped back over to Spike.
        "Buffy," Xander said, grabbing hold of her arm, "I know I'm
going to regret saying this, but don't stake him."
        "What?" she asked incredulously.
        "He came here to stop Drusilla. That's why he's tied up. He
saved my life. If he hadn't kept her busy for a few minutes, I would 
have been dead before you got here. Now, I'm going to go get dressed 
and get stitched up," Xander said, walking away.
        Buffy looked at Spike, her face a mask of confusion.
        "So, what are you going to do, Slayer?" he asked, trying to hide
the fear in his voice.
        She dropped the stake and crossed over to him, hesitating to
untie him. Buffy couldn't believe that he had stood up to Drusilla, 
let alone helped Xander.
        "Why did you do it?" she asked.
        "I don't know," came his response.
        "Don't give me that bullshit, Spike. Why did you save him?"
        "I don't know. I just didn't want Dru to--"
        "To what?"
        "To kill him, ok? I didn't want him to die. Happy?" he said, 
his voice distant even though he stood inches away from her.
        "Why?"
        "Because I knew you'd be angry," was his only answer.
        Buffy looked at him for a minute, but he wouldn't meet her gaze.
She lifted his head up with her hand and forced him to look into her
eyes.
She heard him gasp for an unneeded breath before she leaned in to kiss
him on the cheek. She untied him and he put an arm around her waist.
        "What did you do that for, Slayer?" he asked.
        "I don't know."
        "I can 'ear your pulse racing, Pet. You want to do it again,
don't you?" he asked, pushing a strand of hair out of her face.
        "What are you doing?" she asked.
        "Makin' my life more complicated," he answered, lifting her
head.
        He kissed her with a gentle force. He wasn't trying to hurt her,
but he wouldn't allow her to pull away, either. 
        She finally jerked away, saying, "What did you do that for?"
        "Buffy," he said, calling her by her name for the first time,
"forget about Angelus. Forget about Dru. Forget about you bein' the 
Slayer and me bein' the vampire. Forget about everything just for one 
bloody moment. Just be you."
        He kissed her again and felt her body soften in his arms. He
could feel her heart beating against him and the smell of her shampoo 
filled his nostrils. He had never wanted a mortal like he wanted her. 
He wanted that one moment to last forever.
        "Buffy?" Angel's voice called through the graveyard. "Buffy,
where are you?"
        She and Spike broke off their kiss.
        "Go! Get out of here before he sees you," Buffy said, pushing
him away.
        He kissed her again before turning and running away.
        "Buffy, are you all right?" Angel said, arriving just as Spike
retreated to the darkness.
        "Yeah, I'm fine," she answered, pulling herself together.
        "Xander said that Spike was here. Did you stake him?"
        "No," she said, thinking of the kiss. "I let him go. He saved
Xander's life."
        
        Spike watched Angel put his coat around Buffy and lead her away.
He forced himself to stay hidden. Tonight was not the night to challenge
his sire. He would have Buffy, but he could wait. He swallowed his
jealousy and walked away.
        He had to find a place to stay out of the sun. Dru wouldn't be
pleased that her ceremony had been interrupted. It was best that she 
thought the Slayer had killed him. He stepped into his car and drove 
away, Buffy's scent still filling his senses.
        "Great. One of Dru's crazy schemes backfires again. Now I've
fallen for the bloody Slayer. Well, at least it's not like the time 
that ritual backfired and I spent a month trapped in Texas," he said, 
shuddering. "At least Buffy doesn't consider cowtipping an acceptable 
date activity."
        As he drove away, he didn't see Drusilla standing in the
shadows.
        "Miss Edith tells me Spike thinks 'e loves the Slayer. Mummy
will 'ave to teach 'im a lesson."

~Ripe Wicked Plum~ 
-- 
Goth Spike/ICQ=2607806/Spike Girls(jury & Mommies
Council)/Spike4Sexiest/Spike's Minions/Spuffy/Spike's Sweeties
(#2)/SOOA[Major General (#5)]/I'm Spike's Ducks/ Spikemania(I cherish
Spike's chest)/Red Candy VP/Pres. and founder of the Leo is a Bloody
Whelp Club/Keeper of Spike's terms of endearment and his gloves/Guardian
of Spike's humanity, his amusement at Buffy's Hallowe'en costume, and
his ability to swallow his pride and help Buffy/Keeper of Dru's spiffy
wardrobe and her bruises/ Guardian of Dru's gothness and her fondness
for Rasputina./Keeper of a bunch of other things...just ask me, I'll
tell you!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Chris Winslow" <blueeaglex@hotmail.com>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Eye of the Beholder (1/6)
Date: 27 Oct 1998 04:53:37 PST

Eye of the Beholder (1/6)
Author:  Chris Winslow (blueeaglex@hotmail.com)
Distribution:  Sure, send it to whomever.
Rating: PG-14
NOTE:  This story doesn’t exist in normal Buffy-land.  It’s basically 
set in Season 3, except for the fact that Angel and Buffy are happy, as 
though they never had to deal with last season’s problems.
Disclaimer:  I don’t own Buffy or most of the characters from this 
story.  But you already knew that, didn’t you?

*****

	Buffy walked slowly through the woods, Xander and Willow close behind 
her.  Xander held a stake in one hand, a cheese sandwich in the other 
hand.  The only sound that could be heard was of Xander, as he slowly 
chewed his sandwich.
	"Is it just my imagination, or do you chew really, really loud?" Buffy 
directed the question at Xander, who stopped munching for a moment.  
	Xander shrugged.  "Sorry if I’m scaring away the vampires, Buff’.  A 
guy’s got to eat, though, ya know?"
	Willow kicked along a small rock in front of her as she walked beside 
Xander.  Changing the subject, she said, "Are either of you going to the 
dance this Friday?"  Buffy and Xander remained silent.  Willow burst 
into a smile.  "Oz is taking me.  Lucky for us, the full moon cycle is 
ending on Thursday, so--"
	"So you won’t have to show up at the dance on the arms of a werewolf," 
Xander said, finishing Willow’s sentence.  Her grin grew bigger.  
"There’s no better way to ruin a dance than to bring a blood-thirsty 
creature along."  Willow shot Xander a glance, not liking how he had 
referred to her boyfriend as a "blood-thirsty creature."
	"Angel’s not big on dances," Buffy mused aloud.  "And I don’t feel like 
going stag alone, so...I’ll stay at home and eat my weight in Baskin 
Robbins."  
	"That’s fun, too," Willow remarked.  
	"Just go alone," Xander said, tapping his friend on the shoulder 
affectionately.  "There’s nothing wrong with going stag."
	"Except for the fact that I’ll be stuck in the corner with no one to 
dance with, forced to watch the fortunate people who actually brought a 
date, and stuck reflecting on how pathetic I am for coming in the first 
place?" Buffy quipped.  "Oh yeah, *that* would be the dance of the 
year."
	"I’ll dance with you, Buffy," Xander said.  He paused.  "That is, if 
Cordelia doesn’t--"
	He stopped, mid-sentence, as the threesome heard something rustling in 
a nearby bush.  They all stopped walking, and Xander held his stake in 
front of him, turning one way and then the other, expecting the worse."
	"It might just be a harmless little bunny rabbit," Willow whispered, 
speaking so softly that only Buffy and Xander could hear her.
	Buffy nodded, but added, "Or, it might be a vampire who’s prepared to 
kill us all.  You know what they say: better safe than sorry."
	Buffy leaped forward without warning, her stake high in the air.  
Before her feet even touched the ground, a small gray rabbit scurried 
out of the bush.  
	"Looks like your hunch was right," Buffy said, looking at Willow.
	"And that’s where you’re all wrong."
	Buffy swirled around, seeing a tall, handsome vampire just inches away 
from Xander.  Before Xander could bolt away, the vampire reached forward 
and grabbed him by the neck.  He lifted Xander several inches into the 
air.  "Mmm, dinner is served," the vampire murmured.  
	Xander closed his eyes as the vampire’s mouth came closer to his neck.  
Buffy reacted immediately, one foot kicking Xander out of the vampire’s 
hand.  Xander fell to the ground, brushing himself off.  "How about this 
for an appetizer?" Buffy said, drawing her other foot into the air and 
kicking the vampire against a tree.  
	Buffy swung her stake towards the vampire, but he lunged away.  The 
stake struck the tree, lodging inside.  As Buffy pulled the stake out of 
the tree, the vampire reached for her neck.  
	Willow kicked the vampire’s shin, and he looked to her, surprised.  And 
that was all the time Buffy needed; she swung her fist against the 
vampire’s face.  "Sorry you won’t be able to stay for the main course," 
she said, as she shoved the stake into the vampire’s back.  Willow 
heaved a sigh of relief as the vampire vanished.
	"Let’s call it a night," Buffy said, turning away and starting back 
towards home.  
	"Ok, and then what will we do?"
	Buffy sighed, as she looked at Xander.  "‘Call it a night," as in 
"let’s go home and get some shut-eye.’"
	"Ah."

	Georgia Valentine stared out the window of her bedroom, her mind a 
million miles away.  She brushed her hair with the comb she held in her 
right hand, staring into the darkness.
	"Aren’t you asleep yet?"  Georgia frowned, hearing her mother’s voice 
from outside her room.  Her mother’s voice was irritatingly chirpy, 
considering it was nearly midnight.  "You need your beauty rest, 
Georgia.  Go to sleep."
	"I need beauty, period," Georgia muttered to herself.  She sat her comb 
aside, having brushed it two hundred times, as her mother had taught 
her.  Then, she lifted a small mirror up towards her face, looking at 
her reflection intently.
	She was a plain girl of seventeen--and that was putting it nicely.  Her 
straight black hair parted in the middle, while her face was a pale 
shade of white...although zits and blackheads dotted her nose and 
cheeks.  She pressed her thick glasses up against her nose, scowling at 
herself in the mirror.
	For as long as she could remember, her lack of beauty had been a 
disappointment to her mother.  Laura Valentine had been Homecoming 
Queen, Prom Queen, and even Teen Queen of Sunnydale.  Laura’s light 
blonde hair and sparkling blue eyes looked nearly as good as they had 
decades ago.  Laura had never been able to understand how her daughter 
could be so...ugly.  And she never let a day go by where she didn’t 
remind Georgia.
	"Your father was so handsome," Laura would tell her daughter, in their 
brief daily conversations.  "He was captain of the football team.  He’d 
roll over in his grave if he saw you today."
	Georgia tossed her comb across the room, and it hit the wall, then the 
floor.  A single tear rolled down her cheek as she continued to stare 
into the small mirror.  A soft pink glow appeared around the edges of 
the mirror, and Georgia’s eyes glowed the same color as she gazed deep 
into the compact.  "I’ll show them," she whispered.  "I’ll show them 
all!"

	Students crowded through the halls of Sunnydale High.  Cordelia pressed 
her way through the crowd, shoving students left and right as she made 
her way towards Xander’s locker.  Xander saw Cordelia out of the corner 
of his eye, but pretended not to notice.
	"Hello."  
	Xander turned around.  "Cordelia!  I didn’t see you standing there."
	Cordelia smiled at Xander.  "Liar."  Then, she crossed her arms across 
her body, glancing downward.  "Uh, you know the dance this Friday?  I 
was wondering if...if..."
	"If you have something to ask me, then just say it," Xander replied.  
"He removed a book from his locker.  "You can ask me anything."
	"Who said I was going to ask you anything?" Cordelia said, defensively.  
"After all, isn’t it the guy’s job to ask the girl out?"
	"Hello, this is the 1990’s," Xander said, as he slammed his locker door 
shut.  "Have you heard of a little thing called women’s lib?"
	"That only applies to things that women like to do," Cordelia snapped 
back.  "But we still expect to be asked out."
	Xander sighed, as he and Cordelia began walking down the hallway.  
"Okay, okay."  He paused, then stopped in the middle of the hallway.  In 
a loud voice, he asked, "Cordelia, would you do me the honor of 
accompanying me to the dance this Friday?"
	Cordelia began to smile, then hid her emotion.  She shrugged.  "I’ll 
have to think about it."  And with that, she moved on past Xander, who 
scratched his head, totally puzzled.

	"Get out of the way, geek."
	Georgia let out a yelp as Valerie Graves pushed her aside.  Georgia hit 
the floor, one leg bending backwards into an uncomfortable position.  
Valerie and her friends paid Georgia no attention, as Valerie opened up 
her locker.  Valerie stared at herself in the large mirror she kept 
inside her locker, adjusting her bra slightly to show more of her 
breasts.  She had the largest breasts in school, and never missed an 
opportunity to show them off.
	Georgia stood up from the ground, rubbing her hurt bottom.  "You could 
have asked, I would have moved," Georgia said, hesitating.
	Valerie finished what she was doing in her locker, and then turned to 
look at Georgia.  "Well, you should know better than to get in my way, 
Georgia.  You and the other Class-A nerds should be set aside in your 
own wing, so you wouldn’t have to bother us."
	Georgia frowned and turned away.  As she did so, one of Valerie’s 
friends, a blonde named Tiffany, pushed Georgia up against the wall.  
"You have a serious case of the uglies, Georgia.  It’s hard to believe 
your last name is Valentine, because there’s no way you’d ever get a 
Valentine from a boy at this school."  Valerie and her other friend, a 
girl named Amanda, burst into laughter.  "But I have a solution for your 
problem."
	Georgia froze in fear, unable to move as Tiffany continued to hold her 
against the closed locker.  Tiffany removed some lipstick from her 
purse, then pressed the bright red makeup against Georgia’s face.  She 
smiled as she covered Georgia’s face with the red lipstick.  She didn’t 
stop until Georgia’s lips and her surrounding mouth made her look almost 
cartoonish.  "Oops, sorry!" Tiffany said, laughing, as she put the stick 
back into her purse.  "Now the only guy that will touch you is Bozo the 
Clown...but at least it’s an improvement!"
	Buffy and Willow had watched this scene from down the hallway.  Now, as 
Georgia turned away in shame, Buffy decided she had to do something.  
"Hey!" she called out.  "What makes you think you can make fun of 
someone like that?"
	Valerie turned and looked at Buffy.  "What makes you think I can’t?" 
she challenged.
	Buffy moved towards Valerie swiftly, and as she did, Valerie took her 
lipstick back out of her purse, prepared to use it on Buffy if she 
needed to.  Buffy swatted the lipstick away with one hand, and Valerie 
gasped as Buffy pressed Valerie against the same wall Georgia had been 
on moments before.
	"Stop making fun of people," Buffy whispered, leaning close to 
Valerie’s ear.  "I don’t like it."  Then, she released Valerie from her 
grasp, and walked on with Willow.
	Valerie looked stunned for a moment, but as she regained her composure, 
she joined her friends.  They all looked at Buffy as she turned at the 
end of the hallway.  "SOMEONE sure got up on the wrong side of the bed 
this morning," Valerie grumbled.  "I mean, gee, it was just a joke!"

	As the bell rang for second period, Valerie roamed through the hallway.  
With no intention to go to class, all she wished to do was go to the 
bathroom and have a smoke.  She dashed down the hall, making sure that 
no teacher was in sight.
	Valerie rushed into the girl’s bathroom, and couldn’t help but examine 
herself in the mirror.  She swept one hand through her perfectly combed 
red hair, then pressed her lips together, assuring herself that her 
makeup was in place.  Finally, she pushed her breasts out, trying to 
make them appear to be even bigger than they actually were.  	"There she 
is, Miss America!" Valerie exclaimed to herself, imagining that she was 
the winner in the Miss America beauty pageant.  She could see the crown 
in her head, and smiled to herself at the thought.
	"Someone has a high opinion of themselves, don’t they?"
	Valerie whirled around and watched as Georgia Valentine walked into the 
bathroom.  She grimaced, unable to find one positive thing about 
Georgia’s looks.  Valerie had smooth, soft skin; Georgia’s was covered 
with zits and looked rough.  Valerie had full breasts; Georgia’s hadn’t 
grown since she was eight.
	"I see you’ve wiped off the makeup I gave you," Valerie retorted.  
"It’s a shame...the lipstick was the only thing you had going for you."  
Georgia seemed to tense up, and Valerie continued hurling insults.  "Do 
the whole town a favor and go lie under a rock and die, Georgia.  At 
least then, we won’t have to look at your ugly face."
	Georgia stayed silent, and removed her compact from the small purse she 
had over one shoulder.  "Let me see that," Valerie exclaimed, tearing 
the mirror away. 
	"You REALLY shouldn’t look in my mirror," Georgia teased, as Valerie 
opened the compact up.  "There’s no telling what might happen if you 
do."
	Valerie rolled her eyes.  "Going to sic’ Buffy after me again?  Please, 
Georgia, you’re in high school...you really need to learn to deal with 
your own problems."
	A smile appeared on Georgia’s face as Valerie stared into the mirror.  
The same pink glow that Georgia had seen in the mirror the night before 
appeared again...and as it did so, the picture inside the mirror 
shifted.  
	"Oh my God," Valerie whispered.  She gazed at the picture inside the 
mirror...the picture of her.  She looked exactly the same...except she 
was flat-chested.  She looked up at Georgia.  "Is this some kind of 
joke?"
	Georgia nodded slowly, then grinned.  "The joke’s on you."
	Before Valerie could say anything, a searing pain ripped through her 
chest.  She put her hands over her breasts, then pulled them away.  
Georgia giggled as Valerie stared at her own hands...which were covered 
with blood.
	Valerie let out a scream as she looked at her blood-covered hands.  
Then, with the pain too much for her to handle, she collapsed to the 
ground.
	Georgia picked up the compact from beside Valerie’s body, and then 
moved into a nearby stall.  She could hear someone approaching, so she 
lifted her feet on top of the toilet, trying to avoid being seen.
	"Is everything all right?"  It was Willow, yelling from outside the 
bathroom.  She mused to herself, "Of course, if everything isn’t all 
right, someone might not be able to tell me that.  So maybe I should go 
in."
	Willow stepped into the bathroom, and gasped as she saw Valerie 
sprawled out on the floor.  Valerie’s body turned over with a shudder, 
and Willow screamed herself.
	Where Valerie’s large breasts had been, there was only blood.
	Inside the stall, Georgia continued to smile.  She opened the compact 
again, and used it to look at her own breasts...which were larger then 
they had been only a few moments before.  She touched her breasts 
through her shirt, trying to contain her happiness.  The mirror glowed a 
brighter pink as Georgia giggled happily to herself.

http://members.tripod.com/~jordanrob/index.html

______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: sasheer@mailexcite.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: From Where I Stand
Date: 29 Oct 1998 16:38:12 PST

TITLE: From Where I Stand
BY: Alex Queirolo
E-MAIL: TREYCASH1@yahoo.com
WEB-SITE: http://www.angelfire.com/co/alexfic/index.html
SUMMARY: Cordelia and Xander have it out about their relationship; Buffy
helps out.
SPOILERS: All the way up through All Men Are Beasts/ Beauty and the Beasts.
DISCLAIMER: Characters not mine. Joss is a god. Situations are. I am not a
god. No sue-age.
DEDICATION: To Sash..thanks for the wakey.
MUSIC: Title comes from the Kim Richey CD. The lyrics are off of the Louie
Says CD..specifically the song "She" which was also used in Reptile Boy.
***

"If she bends, then she breaks
She loves you, but then she takes it away
She bends and she bows
She's cold, but she melts like snow
She bends and she breaks
She hates you, but then she makes a mistake"

******************

She pressed her back up against the hard granite of the wall behind her and
allowed her gaze to sweep across the courtyard. She could see him standing
by the fountain, leaning casually forward, a large smile crossing his face.
He laughed. She frowned.

It'd been almost two weeks since the raven haired second slayer Faith had
shown up in Sunnydale. She had very quickly made friends with the rest of
the Scooby Gang and had even forged an uneasy alliance with Buffy. And now
it looked like she was moving in on Xander.

Cordelia Chase shook her head. She wasn't the jealous type. She never had
been. She'd actually never had reason to be. Well aside from the initial
appearance of Buffy back during sophomore year but even that had faded away
quickly when Buffy had made an outcast of herself within the first three
days. 

And there was of course the whole Xander thinking he was madly in love with
Buffy thing. That had been a problem for a good long while until she had
realized just how utterly gone the little blonde Slayer was on Angel. Buffy
had no interest in Xander. No fight there.

Faith was an entirely different problem altogether.

The tall dark-haired Slayer leaned forward and gently slapped Xander against
the chest, laughing at some stupid joke of his. And he of course beamed with
pride and went straight into his next old and decrepit punch line. What did
he see in Slayers anyways? They were going to die. How was that a tunr-on?

"You okay, Cordy?" A soft voice said from beside her. Involuntarily, she
jerked. Her face flushed with embarrassment, she turned and looked at the
small form of Buffy Summers who was watching her with concerned blue eyes.

She smiled weakly," Fine. Just getting some air." Her eyes switched back to
watching Xander and Faith. They were laughing again, looking near tears.

"He's not interested in her. Not really." Buffy said, pushing herself up on
the wall and sitting on the overhang.

"You could fool me," Cordelia muttered. 

"It's just Xander being Xander." Buffy replied, her eyes also tracking over
to where Faith and Xander were. Faith was leaning forward again, her body
language almost suggestive and yet Buffy suspected that that was more habit
than actual interest. Faith seemed to be quite the flirt.

"Ya well..it gets old," Cordelia said, sighing loudly. Then she shook her
head. "Oh this is stupid. Look at me..like she can compare. Whatever." She
pushed herself away from the wall and began to move towards the fountain,
her strides long and tense. Wonderful.

Buffy made a grunting noise and then followed after the tall cheerleader.
Cordelia wasn't the type to get violent but that made very little
difference. A conflict was a conflict and everyone's nerves were already
pulled about as tight as they could get without ripping. Especially her
own.

Her mind flashed on an image of Angel. Lying on the floor of the mansion,
shaking in the seemingly unbreakable hold of his nightmares. She shook her
head. That was a problem she wasn't quite ready to deal with it. Running her
hand through her hair, she made the conscious choice to push it back until
it was hidden in the darkness of her soul. Hidden where only she could make
it reappear. In theory.

"Xander," Cordelia said, striding up to him and wrapping a hand around his
arm. He blinked in surprise and then leaned across and kissed her.

"Cor, what's up? Big trouble or just hair problems?" Xander grinned. Faith
chuckled.

"So not funny." She glanced over at Faith and then looked away, slipping
back into her absentee bitch mode.

"Okay. What can I do ya for?" Xander asked, taking her hand. He looked up
when he saw Buffy approach and flashed her a smile. "Buffster, hey! It's a
regular party."

"It's not," Buffy said, smiling weakly. "Faith and I..we..uh..we need to do
something."

"We do?" Faith asked, looking slightly suspicious.

Buffy nodded. "We do. Um, patrol."

"It's four in the afternoon. The sun doesn't set for another two hours."
Faith reminded her, settling her hands on her hips and cocking her head to
one side.

Buffy chuckled uneasily and rushed for a back-up reply,"Uh ya..but Giles
think we should take a look during the day..just..because.."

"Because some of the demons might have forgotten that the sun makes them the
equivalent of duraflame logs?" Faith queried, seeming almost amused as she
made Buffy squirm.

"Exactly," Buffy replied. Then she sombered up and reached for Faith's arm.
"Let's go." She nodded to the others. "See you guys at the Bronze later
tonight, right?"

Xander nodded,"Ayup. Cake's playing."

"Great. Lates." Buffy smiled again and then pulled Faith after her.

Xander watched for a moment and then turned to Cordelia, "Well that was odd.
Then again, it's Buffy.."

"Right," Cordelia murmured. "It's Buffy." Then she looked up at him. "Or
it's Faith. What's that all about?"

						***

"So you gonna tell me what that was all about, B?" Faith asked,
disentangling herself from Buffy's grasp as soon as they entered the main
hall of the school building and were walking towards the Library.

"Xand has a girlfriend, Faith." Buffy replied, not meeting the taller
Slayers' eyes. 

"And your point?"

"Just..just don't encourage it, okay?"

Faith lifted an eyebrow, half-amused and half-annoyed. "You really are wound
too tight. I'm not moving in on Xander."

"Well it kinda looked that way," Buffy said, stopping to look at Faith, her
eyes still darting away. For some reason, ever since she'd started hiding
Angel. she'd been loathe to make eye contact, certain that the others would
be able to see the truth lurking behind her blues.

"Well I wasn't. He was funny. I was laughing. No big." Faith replied,
leaning against the wall. "Besides, he's sorta not my type."

"He's a good guy," Buffy said softly.

"Didn't say he wasn't. Just not the kinda guy I want to get naked with." She
paused. "What about you? Or is it just studly dead guys for you?"

Buffy's eyes flashed upwards, glittering dangerously. She bit back on her
first retort and instead ground out," Don't talk about Angel."

Faith shrugged, seemingly painfully nonchalant about the whole thing. "Hey,
no skin off my back. Just trying to figure out why you're so tense all of
the sudden."

"All of the sudden?" Buffy queried, taking an involuntary step away.

"Yeah. A couple of days ago, you seemed calmer and more party hardy..you've
been wound like a yo-yo since that night you replaced me on wolfie-watch."

"Good recall," Buffy murmured.

"What?"

"Hm. Oh, nothing. Just stuff. Nothing big." Then she shook her head. "Point
is, nothing is wrong."

"Okay," Faith said with a nod, reaching into her pocket and fingering a pack
of cigarettes. Buffy eyed them warily."So we should go patrol."

"It's daylight still."

"See..*I* know this." Faith said with a grin. 

Buffy rolled her eyes,"Come on. We'll check in and then go  get something to
eat before it gets dark." She flipped a hand casually in the air as they
entered the Library. She smiled when she saw Giles and Willow sitting at the
table, heatedly discussing some dusty volume sitting in front of them.

"Hey," Buffy said, smiling slightly as she saw her Watcher run a hand
through his hair in obvious frustration. The next sign, his removing of his
glasses came a moment later. "Problems?"

"Hm. Oh..Buffy, Faith, hello. Problems? No, of course not." 

Faith lifted an eyebrow, "Okay and I thought you were corked, B."

"What's up, Giles?" Buffy asked, concern creasing her brow.

Willow stood up beside Giles,"Well..it would seem that someone has been
making a lot of fledgling vamps around town.."

"Yes.." Giles sighed. "And they seemed to have gathered..nested persay..
near the Bronze."

Buffy rolled her eyes and slumped into one of the seats. Faith followed her
lead by settling onto the top of the table. "Go on," Buffy murmured dryly.
"Ruin my night." And yet even as she tried to focus on the words her Watcher
was saying, all she could think about were the two friends she'd left out in
the courtyard.



						***

Xander paced a few feet and then turned back to gaze at his girlfriend who
was sitting on the bench surrounding the fountain. "Are you serious? I was
making with the funny. That wasn't flirting."

"It looked like it to me. Why are you obsessed with Slayers? Am I not good
enough for you?" She ran a slightly shaking hand through her dark hair.

"Of course you are. Where is this coming from?"

She shook her head in disbelief, "You really don't get it do you? Do you
have any idea what you look like when you're talking to Faith?"

"No. Enlighten me." Xander snapped back, his voice taking on a defensive
edge.

"Like a little boy in a candy shop. It was the same way with Buffy last
year."

"So I'm friendly."

"So you're drooling," she hissed in reply. "I'm not stupid, Xander. I know
you have a thing for exciting chicks like Buffy and Faith."

"Yeah..they're fun to hang with. But I'm with you aren't I?"

Cordelia gazed up at him, her eyes suddenly making her appear very young and
vulnerable. "But am I who you want to be with."

"Of course," he replied instantly, dismissively.

"Don't," she said, speaking between tightly clenched teeth. 

"Don't?" he repeated.

"Don't blow it off like I'm asking you if you're gonna go to class. This is
serious. If Buffy said today that she'd be your girlfriend, would we still
be going out?"

"She wouldn't say that. She's still in love with Angel." Xander replied,
evasively.

Cordelia shook her head in disgust, "Great, thanks." She got to her feet and
started to walk away but was stopped by his hand locking around her
forearm.

"Hey! What is your problem?" Xander gazed back at her with concern but all
she saw was confusion. And that just made her angrier.

She pushed his arm away, "You don't get it, do you? I ask you a simple
question and you go around it! All I wanted to know was if you'd be with me
if Buffy said she wanted you. But you can't even answer that, can you?"

"You didn't give me time.."

"You need time?" Cordelia asked, looking suddenly like she was about to
dissolve into tears. "It's pretty much a yes or no question." She shook her
head. "And you know what? I don't really wanna hear the answer." Pushing him
away from her, she stalked away, looking every bit the angry woman she
seemed to be.

Xander watched her for a long moment, her face contorted in confusion,"What
the hell was that all about?"

						***

The music was already winding its' way through the Bronze by the time Buffy
and Faith entered. The smaller blonde slayer was rubbing her shoulder and
looking more than a little pained. She glanced around quickly and caught
sight of Willow and Oz sitting at a table, gazing at each other with
puppy-dog eyes. Buffy shivered involuntarily and then began to weave towards
them.

"Hey guys,"Buffy asked, falling into one of the chairs. Just moments after
her butt had hit the seat, Willow was upon her, lifting the sleeve of her
shirt so that she could inspect the wound.

"Are you okay?" Willow asked, using her hairclip to pin the sleeve away from
the torn flesh. "Did you two find the fledgling nest?"

Faith nodded, still standing but carefully watching as Willow tended to
Buffy's wound. "We did. A couple got away but we partied."

Buffy nodded, "We did. So hey, where's the Mismatched Twosome?"

"They're fighting," Willow murmured, reaching across the table to pick up a
white napkin. She dipped it into the water in front of Oz and then biting
her tongue in concentration went to work wiping the dried blood away from
the gash on Buffy's shoulder.

"Fighting?" Buffy said uneasily. "About?"

"Same ol', same ol'," Oz muttered, handing Willow a dried napkin.

Willow glanced up at Buffy, frowning slightly when she noticed the blonde
skirt her eyes. "Cordelia's upset because Xander won't stop looking around
and Xander..well..you know him."

"Lemme guess..he hasn't a clue."

Willow smiled, somewhat sadly. "That's why we love him."

"So, she's upset because she saw me and him talking?" Faith asked, eyebrow
lifted. She glanced casually over at Buffy's shoulder and then looked back
at Willow who was now gently probing the wound to ensure that nothing
foreign had gotten stuck in it.

"No..well yes..no. It's more than that." Willow sighed dramatically. She and
Buffy exchanged knowing looks. "Xander tends to roam. He's not very good at
seeing what he already has.."

"Sounds like a typical guy," Faith said with a shrug.

"But he's not. He means well.." Willow protested, feeling like she should
come to the defense of her oldest friend.

Buffy nodded,"He does. They both do. I'll go talk to him..her..see if I can
help."

"I'll go with," Willow said, finishing the probing and then taking a step
back so that she could inspect the wound in the light.

Buffy shook her head,"Nah. You're partying. I'll do it. Faith..you should
probably stay here."

The tall slayer shrugged," Sure. I'm starved."

Buffy nodded thoughtfully and then raised a hand to push her sleeve down.
She saw Willow frown. "It's fine."

"I know but I'd like to look at it again later...just to make sure. And you
might wanna put some.."

"It's fine, Will. But I'll drop by later so you can play nurse again, ok?"

Willow smiled shyly and then nodded. Buffy turned and started walking away
from the table but stopped when Will grabbed her arm. "Good luck."

					***

She was laying on his bed when he came out of the bathroom. Lifting an eye
in amusement, he looked down at her. "This is new."

She sat up and frowned at him," Hey Xand-man. Your..uh..your mom let me
in...she couldn't quite recall where your room was."

"Good ol' mom," Xander grinned. "Gotta love the units. Good for a laugh
everyday. So what brings you to my room. To my bed."

"Cordelia."

"I believe the word for that is threesome..only in french."

 Buffy rolled her eyes, "I hear you guys had a fight."

He sighed deeply and turned away," I guess so. She's mad at me..I haven't  a
clue why."

"Yeah, you do." Buffy said, nodding once. "Think about it."

"Don't you think I have?"

"No. I think you've tried but not really. Come on, Xand.."

He shook his head,"What do you want from me?"

"What I want is irrelevant. You and Cordy have issues and you hiding from
each other ain't exactly the best way to solve them. Trust me.." she
swallowed hard. "I know."

He studied her for a long moment and the nodded. "You're hurt."

"I'm fine. This is about Cordy. Don't change the subject."

"Fine. It's about Cordy. She thinks I'm obsessed with you. And with Faith."

"Are you?"

"No!"

"Okay. Then it's that easy. What's the problem?"

"I stalled."

"Why?" Buffy asked softly, absently rubbing her shoulder as it began to
ache. She waved him off when he took a step towards her. "Why?"

"I don't know.."

"Yeah you do."

"What the fuck are you getting at?" Xander snapped suddenly, eyes glowing.

"Hey!" she replied sharply. "Don't get pissed off at me. I'm already the
Queen of fucking up relationships but this one ain't my bad. Now you're
always yelling at me to stop running..face your own music, Xan."

He shook his head and began to pace circles around his room, head down and
deep in thought. He didn't even notice when Buffy lifted herself from the
bed and wrapped her arms around him. "Do you love her?"

"What if I do?"

"Then there's something all of it's own that you have to face. But make
sure..don't hurt her. She doesn't deserve that." Buffy said, resting her
head on his shoulder.

He closed his eyes,"What do I do?"

"Come to my house in about an hour. Mom's staying in Los Angeles for the
night. I'll get the gang over there..Cordy too..you guys can talk. Okay?"

He nodded slowly,"Okay."

"Good," she smiled. She took a step away from him and started towards the
door.

"Hey Buff?"

"Ya?" she asked, turning.

"Are you okay?"

She blinked," Sure. Ya. Why wouldn't I be?"

"I've just been worried..ever since you broke up with Scott..you've seemed a
little distracted."

She smiled faintly. They were catching on too quickly. "Just tired, Xand.
That's all. See ya in an hour." And then turning on her heels, she made a
quick departure before she was asked anymore questions.

						***

She was leaning forward, eyes locked on the screen in front of her when she
heard the front door open and someone call out a tentative hello. She lifted
one hand to wave Cordelia into the house and then went back to focusing on
the Nintendo game playing on her television.

"Hey Cordy," Willow chirped, patting the couch next to her.

"What are they doing?" Cordelia asked, gesturing towards the floor where
Buffy and Oz were seated.

"Mortal Kombat. They've been locked in a grudge-match for almost an hour
now." Willow replied, clapping as Oz scored a punch to Buffy's character.

"Fascinating." Cordelia murmured, taking a seat. "So uh..where is he?"

"Over here." Xander said softly, leaning against the swinging door to the
kitchen. "Can we uh..talk?" His eyebrow lifted in worried confusion, seeming
almost scared that she'd refuse.

She nodded.

Standing up, she crossed over to him and followed him into the kitchen.
Buffy looked away from the screen momentarily so that she could exchange a
glance with Willow and then hissed when Oz took advantage of her shift in
focus and knocked her character down. "Cheater."

Oz grinned,"When I need to."

					***

"So.." Xander began, obviously uneasy.

"So.." she repeated.

"Are you..uh..are you okay?" he licked his lips and shifted slightly, his
very posture relaying how uncomfortable he was.

"Oh this is stupid," she muttered. "We've been going out for months..we
can't even have a simple conversation.."

"Yeah we can.."

"Okay..then let's."

"We are."

"Are we?"

"Yes..I wanna say no."

She blinked. "Excuse me?"

"No..if Buffy asked me to date her today..I would say no. I'm with you."

There was a moment of silence and then she said softly,"Do you mean that?"

He nodded,"Yeah. God help me, Cor..I do."

She stared at him thoughtfully and then whispered,"So why are you just
standing there? Why aren't you kissing me?"

His face exploded into a consuming smile. "I'm a damn fool." He took a step
towards her and wrapped her into his arms.

"Yes, you are." She replied, kissing him soundly. "But it's cute."

"I know," he grinned, deepening the kiss and pulling her closer.

					***

Buffy and Oz were still battling feverishly when Cordelia and Xander exited
the kitchen, hand-in-hand.  Buffy looked up, managing to throw a glare at Oz
before she did. "So? All good?"

"Yep. He's accepted that I'm perfect," Cordelia grinned.

"Perfectly Cordy," Xander amended. "But it's why we all love her."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Uh huh." Shaking her head, she dropped her attention
back to the game and let it sweep her thoughts away.


-FIN
FEEDBACK PLEASE..sequel perhaps.




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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: taygeta@juno.com (C. Catherine)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: REVISED--Chronicles (29/30)
Date: 29 Oct 1998 17:47:26 -0800

TITLE: Chronicles of the White Knight #29 Death and Destiny
AUTHOR: Taygeta
E-MAIL: taygeta@juno.com
FEEDBACK:  Criticism muchly welcomed!  (Bad or good...whatever the
complaint).  
DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just tell me first.
RATING: PG
KEYWORDS: Buffy/Xander fanfic
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Due to some confusion and a suggestion from a great fellow
writer, Jai, I revised the section between CLANG and the fading mark
~*~*~*~*~*~
DISCLAIMER:  The characters portrayed in this fanfic and any such
reference to Buffy the Vampire Slayer television series belong to their
creator, Joss Whedon, and their owners, Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui
Productions, Sanddollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox. In other
words, they do not belong to me.  Copyright infringement not intended.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Chronicles of the White Knight
#29 Death and Destiny
By: Taygeta

The room was engulfed in darkness as his conscious crept out of the black
sea it had lay in for hours on end.  Xander's weak, tired eyes opened
groggily as the sedative faded slowly away and the pain of his beaten
body came surging throughout him.  He let out a loud cry as he
immediately clutched his cast covered right leg.

"God!  Somebody help me!" he screamed and a nurse and doctor immediately
ran into the room.

"Calm down, Mr. Harris, calm down," the doctor said gently as the nurse
handed her a filled syringe.  She calmly punctured his skin with a quick
thrust of a thin, silver needle, "There.  You're going to be just fine…"

The tranquilizer was strong and its effects came even more quickly than
the pain had.  Xander's shuddering form fell back down against the bed
and his eyes grew weary as the pain receded and before the black came to
swallow him whole again, he turned to see a white envelope with his name
written in familiar script - Buffy's.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 The ivy-walled edifice looked ancient and worn beneath the moonlight and
Buffy wondered what it had looked like in its prime.  Xander had taken
her to look at this mansion once when they walked by it during patrol,
said something about it belonging to a Havisham who died a few decades
ago.  Now, years later, still prevailed by death, it stood representing
age and decay.

The huge black gate creaked when she pushed it open and walked in, the
gate slamming loudly behind her.  As her shoes hit the concrete pavement
she wondered if it was all a trick - if Druscilla, Spike, and Angelus
would all be there to gang up on her - but she took a deep breath and
realized that it would never be like that.  Angelus would never *let* it
be like that.  In his eyes, she was the ultimate killing prize, to be
shared by no one and realizing this, Buffy's apprehension grew stronger.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"What do you think she's doing right now?"  Cordelia asked glancing at
Willow.

"I don't know…I'm not sure I want to know," she replied honestly as she
looked up from her book, "I hope that whatever it is, it involves her
staying alive."

"Yeah…me too."

The redhead looked at her in surprise, "Really?"
"What do you take me for, Willow?  The Wicked Witch of the West?"  Cordy
asked and then paused, "On second thought, don't answer that."

She laughed, "No, of course I don't, it's just that, you've never really
liked Buffy."

"Well, I don't," she said, "Sort of…at least, I don't want her to die. 
She's too important - not to me - but to Xander."

"You really do love him, don't you?" 

"Yeah, he's the first guy I *really* cared about.  I mean, all the other
guys, it was always that they had a car, money, or whatever, but with
Xander it was different.  He didn't have a car - he had his mom's car -
and he didn't have money or a great fashion sense, but for some reason,
that didn't matter."

"Are you still - "

Cordelia shook her head softly and smiled as she looked at the magazine
on her lap, "No, the reality of Buffy and Xander kind of kicked in."  She
paused and then glanced at Willow, "But, right now, if the remote
impossibility that he would fall in love with me were to occur?  I'd stop
lying to myself, and everyone else, that I wasn't."

Before Willow could reply, Giles entered the library, "You two should get
home and get some sleep."

"Sleep, Giles?"  Willow asked, "Not sleeping is why we came here.  I
couldn't sleep if I tried.  On one hand, I'm worried about Xander and on
the other hand, I'm worried about Buffy."

"Why is it that we let these two run rampant in our lives?"  Cordelia
asked returning to her usual demeanor, "Oh…right…I forgot they're our
friends.  You know, this part of the whole friendship thing, sucks!"

"Agreed," said Giles nodding, "But in consolation, you know that they'll
do the same for you."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Did you decide to come to play, Buffy?"  Druscilla asked with her
humanoid face.

 "Hello, Druscilla," the slayer responded with a stake in hand,
"Play…yup, that's the motive."

"Spike, Buffy's come to play," the feminine vampire said as the
counterpart rolled into the room.

"But not with you, pet," he responded as he patted the hand that rested
on the armrest of his chair.

She pulled her hand away and smiled as she approached the figure in the
shadow, "Angelus, can't I have her instead? 

"Over Angel's ashes, maybe," muttered Spike has he began rolling away
with a sigh.

"Dru, go away," Buffy responded bluntly, "I kind of like to get this over
with."

"Angel…"

"Dru, go away," he reiterated.

With an angry pout, she did as commanded.

"So, this is it," Buffy said as he walked out of the shadow he had been
in, "The end."

"You mean, your end," he replied holding two swords in the air and
tossing one at her, "Catch."

She grasp the sword's handle tightly and said, "We'll just see about
that.  Fair's fair, remember?"

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

The metals clashed loudly, the sound echoing in the large ruined room.  

"I see you haven't lost your touch," he said.

Buffy instantly thought of a training session she had had with Angel a
long time ago that dealt with her putting a sword to his neck and she
responded, "And I see you haven't lost yours.  Let's just hope that this
time, beheading is into play."

"You know what?" he said as tried to jab her side and missed, "Let's just
not."

She breathed heavily and remembered when last she heard those very words.
 Xander.  The day before she died.  Xander, who was lying in that
hospital bed because of Angelus.  Xander, who had saved her life and who
she had shunned so many times.  She broke his heart then as she broke his
heart nearly a month ago, but in a month ago's time, she wasn't in
control…Angelus was.

Newfound antagonism rose from her as she attacked Angelus and their
swords clashed once again.  Left…right…her arm swung the sword against
his counter attack

"So how's your boy toy?" he asked snidely as he thrust his sword at her
stomach and she jumped back onto a stone bench.

"Alive."

Angelus laughed, "Too bad, figured I left him for dead."

"Enough with the chitchat, she said angrily, "Let's get this over with."

"If you say so, lover," he responded and the tried to ram the sword near
her heart.

Buffy moved out of the way and her left arm caught the blade, which
seared the fabric of her shirt and the skin beneath.  The red blood
dripped from the wound and stained the white fabric.

He smelled the air and grin, "Ah, the smell of the sweetest of wines."

She gritted her teeth and tried to ignore the burning sensations that
resonated from the deep wound.  Taking a deep breath, she glanced at the
sword with eyes glazed with hope and gripped its handle tightly.

CLANG.  It began again.  The tension was at a high and continued to mount
with every passing second until suddenly it happened.  First, the cold
steel broke into the skin that survived centuries of torment and
punctured - tore - the core of vampiric life, so that with a gasp, the
demon, Angelus, began to lose his grip on the immortality long obtained. 

His eyes widened as he slumped to the floor, and Buffy saw an almost
pleading look in his eyes as she withdrew the metal edge from his chest. 
Time no longer moved.  It was frozen and she with it.  Standing with
blade in hand, she looked deep into eyes that almost looked human -
almost looked Angel.  Pulling herself together, she swallowed hard and
breathed heavily as she rose the glinting weaponry into the air.  

With a soft whisper, "good-bye," the sword fell and the silver steel
ripped through the pallid throat.  The ashes crashed onto the floor, and
the cry of anguish begun seconds earlier, echoed throughout the room.  As
if proclaiming that evil's destiny was fulfilled.

Exhausted, heavyhearted, she fell to her knees and there was a crash as
metal hit cement when she relinquished the damaging weapon from her
grasp.  Falling upon the last remnants of Angelus, the sword, which bound
him to his ultimate death, was covered until there was almost a sheath of
ash over it.  He was gone.  There was nothing left to it but that for all
that had been, was not, and Angelus, Angel, and her Angel gone with it.  

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"She killed him…didn't know she had it in her," Spike said when he saw
him crumble into dust.

"So, she dies," Dru said simply as she saw the sun beginning to rise up
ahead, "When she least expects it, I will come and I will kill her."

He looked at her resilient expression and sighed before rolling away into
the shadows of the archaic structure.  Druscilla had always been in love
with Angel and for those centuries in which it had only been she and he,
she had never left that state of mind and heart.  Sadly, he realized that
it would always be that way, and that that love would mean his
Druscilla's end, and therein laid his own fate.

___________________________________________________________________
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: DaniLynn27@aol.com
Subject: BUFFYFIC: First Encounter (1/1)
Date: 31 Oct 1998 16:24:40 EST

TITLE: First Encounter
AUTHOR: Danielle Loughlin
E-MAIL: DaniLynn27@aol.com
FEEDBACK: Sure. This is just a little ease-my-boredom fic though.
DISTRIBUTION: My site. Anyone else, please ask, I'll say yes, I just like to
know where my fics go.
RATING: G
SPOILERS: None
SUMMARY: A pre-quel to the Buffyverse perhaps. Just a little story I had to
write to get it out of my head.
DISTRIBUTION: Joss owns all. I own none. No infringement intended.



Sunnydale Community Playground, 1985.

Mrs. Harris led her five-year-old son Alexander over to the morning playgroup
she had signed him up for while she went to work. The little boy clung to his
mother's hand, looking around at all the other little kids with big eyes. 

"Okay, Alexander, Mommy has to go now. Are you going to be okay?" He nodded,
half not wanting his mother to leave, and half wanting to go over and climb on
the huge rock in the middle of the playground. Mrs. Harris bent down to his
level and kissed her son on the forehead. "Be good now. Don't pick up bugs and
pull their legs off." She disentangled her hand from his and headed back to
the car.

Alexander looked around, trying to decide what to do first. A group of kids
were doing fingerpainting with the program director. Nah, he decided. Been
there, done that. A girl he knew from nursery school, Cordelia, was sitting on
a bench in a lacy, ribboned dress. She held a doll in her lap and was showing
it to her friend sitting beside her. Alexander figured he'd head over there.
It was someone he knew at least.

"Hi Cordelia," he said, approaching the bench.

Cordelia turned to face him. "Go away. We don't like you. You're a BOY. And
you're dirty," she declared, sticking her tongue out at him. Alexander stuck
his tongue back out at her.

"And you're a dorkhead," he retailiated. Fine. Cordelia didn't want to play
with him.

He looked around some more. A boy was sitting off by himself, playing with a
toy guitar. Alexander decided to try him next. He looked harmless. Alexander
walked over and sat down on the grass beside him. "Hi," he said. 

"Hi," the boy said back. 

"Whatcha doing?" Alexander asked.

"Playing music," was the reply.

"What's your name?"

"Oz."

"Oh," Alexander said. Never heard of that name before. He sat for a minute,
watching the boy run his fingers over the guitar strings. Oz ignored
Alexander, engrossed in his "music". Alexander got bored and started looking
around the playground for a new playmate.

There was a pig-tailed, red-haired girl in the sandbox, building a careful
sand castle. He watched her as she carefully placed more sand in even layers,
making sure she didn't knock the castle over. 

Another kid came up to the red-haired girl. Alexander watched, wondering what
would happen next. The kid was bigger than the girl, and looked mean. Then the
big kid kicked over the girl's sand castle, laughing. Alexander jumped to his
feet and ran over to the girl, wanting to defend her. 

"Hey you!", Alexander said. "Don't be mean to her."

"Oh yeah? What are you gonna do? Hit me?" the bully said.

"Maybe," Alexander said. He had an idea. He quickly bent down and scooped up a
handful of sand and threw it at the kid. The kid ran away, yelling. Alexander
turned to the girl. She had tears in her eyes, but a smile on her face. "Don't
cry," he told her. "I'll help you build another castle." Alexander wrapped the
girl in a tight hug, trying to make her feel better in his five-year-old way.

The girl smiled even wider. 

"What's your name?" Alexander asked.

"Willow," the girl said. 

"That's pretty. I'm Alexander."

"Alexa- - Alexan --", Willow struggled, trying to make her tiny tongue form
the big word. "Xander," she finally said. "I'm naming you Xander."

"Cool," Xander said. "Wanna be best friends?"

"Yeah," Willow said. She was looking at him funny. Wide-eyed. Adoring. He felt
like the big brother, the cool kid. Willow was his girl now.

The pair sat down to build a foundation for the sandcastle, and for a
friendship that would last the ages. 

**END**