From: owner-buffyfic@lists.xmission.com (Buffyfic-digest) To: buffyfic-digest@lists.xmission.com Subject: Buffyfic-digest V2 #69 Reply-To: buffyfic@xmission.com Sender: owner-buffyfic@lists.xmission.com Errors-To: owner-buffyfic@lists.xmission.com Precedence: bulk Buffyfic-digest Sunday, March 22 1998 Volume 02 : Number 069 In this issue: BUFFYFIC: Our Hearts Will Go On 5/6 BUFFYFIC: Our Hearts Will Go On 6/6 See the end of the digest for information on subscribing to the buffyfic or buffyfic-digest mailing lists and on how to retrieve back issues. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Sun, 22 Mar 1998 11:15:50 -0800 (PST) From: michele v Subject: BUFFYFIC: Our Hearts Will Go On 5/6 TITLE: Our Hearts Will Go On 5/6 AUTHOR: Michele V. EMAIL ADDRESS: glynisgrl@yahoo.com FEEDBACK: Definitely, especially since this is my first fic. SPOILERS: All episodes through "What's My Line 1 & 2," and especially "Angel," in this part. RATING: PG SUMMARY: A Buffy/Angel story with some added Willow/Oz and Xander/Cordelia. Also, Buffy and the gang find out about the return of the Master- in some form. DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters except for "The Elgradora" All of the other characters belong to Joss Whedon and the WB. No copywrite infringement intended. NOTE: I wrote this after "What's My Line 2," therefor without knowing that something similar would *sort of* happen in "Surprise" ********** PART 5 THE NEXT DAY(SATURDAY) BUFFY'S HOUSE The door bell rang at the Summers' house and Buffy went to answer it since no one else was home. "Hi, Buffy," Willow greeted her at the door. "Hey, Will," Buffy answered. "Come on in." Willow walked in and Buffy shut the door behind her. "How are you feeling?" Willow asked her friend. Buffy seemed like she was in a daze. "No, Angel hasn't left yet," she answered her friend. "Uh, Buffy, are you alright?" Willow asked concerned. "Fine! Everything's fine! I'm fine, my mom's fine. I'm sure your fine..you are fine, right?" Willow nodded. "Yeah, but I don't think you are." "Don't be silly. I'm fine..great..wonderful. Nothing could be better," Buffy told her. "Are you sure about that Buffy," Willow asked. Buffy nodded. "Yeah! Why?" "Well, you're acting kind of strange. And when I asked you a minute ago how you were you told me that Angel hasn't left yet..That wasn't the question I asked," Willow told her. Buffy sighed. "I'm sorry..Guess I just have some- things on my mind," she explained. "Like, Angel leaving?" Willow asked. Buffy nodded. "Like Angel leaving," she repeated in an answer. "Look, I know this must be hard for you," Willow started, attempting to comfort her friend. Buffy looked at Willow, as if Willow really didn't know how hard it was. Willow sighed. "Ok, maybe I don't really know. I'm just trying to make you feel better- if that's possible," she said. Buffy sighed. "Look, I appreciate your help, I do. But, I really don't think that anything can help. I mean, Angel's leaving. There's nothing that can stop that from happening." Willow stared at Buffy. She knew that Buffy was right- There was nothing that could make Buffy feel any better- There was nothing that could prevent Angel from leaving. Buffy sat on her couch, looking in the other direction. Willow sat next to her. Tears were forming in Buffy's eyes. "It's just so hard...It's so hard..The only thing that makes sense to me is gone," she said. "He hasn't left yet, Buffy. You could still go see him now," Willow said softly. Buffy shook her head. "I can't. We said goodbye already..last night. We, well it wasn't exactly goodbye..I kinda just left and said bye," Buffy told her. "What happened? I mean, I expected you guys to go through that whole mushy goodbye thing," Willow said. "Definitely no mushy goodbye...He just told me that I had to go get help with the vampire bite and I said ok and just kinda said see you to him and walked out the door" she told Willow. "And I can't go back there to see him, it'll just make it harder for us both. I think that despite my feeling awful about ending like that, maybe there's still the chance that it'll work out easier," Buffy explained. "Well, is it working so far? Do you think it's easier?" Willow asker her. "No, I think I may have made it harder. I'll probably never forgive myself for not saying goodbye the right way, but, I guess I'll just have to give it time.," Buffy answered. There was a knock at the door. "Oh, I'll get it," Willow told her, getting up. "It's probably just Oz. He's been waiting out in his van for me," she said. "Oz?" Buffy asked. "Yeah..we're going on our first date tonight" Willow said. "Oh. Where to?" Buffy asked. "The Bronze," Willow answered. "The Bronze? That sounds romantic and quite..have fun," Buffy said sarcastically. Willow opened the door. "Hey, Oz. Come on in," she said motioning inside. "Shouldn't we get going?" he asked as she closed the door behind him. "Uh, yeah. Hey, Buffy- Do you wanna- come?" she asked her friend. "Xander's gonna be there too..uh, with Cordelia, but still there." "Nah. I think I'll stay in tonight. Besides, you two are going on a date, I don't wanna impose or anything," Buffy said. "Oh, no. You won't be imposing. We want you to come..Don't we Oz?" "Sure. It'll kinda break that first date tension having someone else around," Oz answered with a grin. "I don't know..I won't be much for company," she said. "Sure you will Buffy. You always are," Willow said. "Well, Angel has never left town for good before," Buffy reminded her. "Oh...yeah. But, I mean it's Saturday night. What else are you going to do besides stay home and wish Angel wasn't leaving," Willow pointed out. Buffy thought for a minute. "Ok..I'll come. I- just have to get something upstairs. I'll be down in a few minutes. You guys can wait outside," she said. "Ok..great," Willow said smiling. Buffy smiled back and ran upstairs. ******** GILE'S HOUSE Gile's was reading one of the Watcher diaries when he heard a knock on his door. He got up to answer it. He was surprised at who stood in front of it. "Oh..he..hello, Angel....Uh, why don't you come in?" he said, motioning him to come inside. Angel nodded. "Thanks." "Have a seat," Giles said pointing over to the couch. Angel nodded and sat down. "So..What brings you here?" Giles asked concerned. "The book on the Elgradora..I was able to get it for you. I thought- you'd be at the school library but you weren't..so I cam here to give it to you," Angel explained. He held out the book in his hands, giving it to Giles. Giles took it and looked down at it for a moment. He then began flipping through the pages. "It's somewhere in the fourth chapter," Angel told him. Giles flipped to Chapter four and scanned it for information. "Oh..yes, here it is..Well, Thank you very much. This will indeed be helpful in protecting Buffy-and- us all. Thank you," he said. "No problem," Angel said. His face saddened at the thought that he wouldn't be there anymore to protect Buffy as he always did before. "Is...she alright?" Angel asked suddenly. "Who? Buffy?" Giles asked. "Yeah. She was bitten by a vampire last night and I told her to go see you. Is she alright?" Angel asked, concerned. "Yes. Sh-she's fine," Giles assured him. There was a long silence. "Buffy-told me that you're leaving Sunnydale," Giles said, trying to make conversation. "I am..I'm leaving tonight," he told Giles. "Yes-I know. Buffy-is- very upset. She's going to miss you quite a bit, I suppose,"Giles told him. Angel nodded. "I know..I'm going to miss her too," he said in a sad tone. "When I got my soul back, I never thought that I'd be able to love anyone again. I thought..no human could ever love me because I'm not human and no vampire could ever love me and I could never love them because I'm not like them anymore..But then I met Buffy..and I fell in love with her..She- fell in love with me. And I was the happiest I'd ever been in all my life..because I felt-almost human again..I felt loved. There was still loneliness, still pain..but there was love..the greatest thing that could ever happen to me..and Buffy gave it to me. And now- it's all being taken away. I have to leave..." he "I'm terribly sorry that things can't work out for the two of you, Angel. And- I mean that. I know, I've said in the past that a vampire and a slayer could never belong together. But when I saw the extraordinary love that you have for Buffy and the extraordinary love that Buffy has for you...Well, I realized that you two were meant to be together" Giles told him. There was a short silence. "I should- probably thank you, as Buffy's watcher, for allowing us to be together," Angel said. "Well, as I said, I recognized that nothing could keep true lovers apart, and you two- are, in a sense, true lovers. I wasn't about to attempt to tear that apart," Giles explained. "But this does," Angel said, a sad tone in his voice. "Well, yes, I suppose it will.. But- even while the two of you are apart, I know- that you're love for each other will remain..perhaps forever" Giles said. "Angel," Giles began, curious,"Have you told Buffy what you just told me- about how you never thought you could love anyone until you met her?" he asked. "I've told her..many times," Angel told him. "Well did you tell her last night- before the two of you said goodbye?" Giles continued. Angel shook his head. "I didn't..I didn't get the chance to say goodbye to her. She was gone before I could say anything," Angel explained. He paused for a second. "Do you..think- you could tell her that I said goodbye..and..that- I love her?" he asked. Giles nodded. "I could..But- I know Buffy very well, and I know that she'd much rather hear you say that to her then, well me, of course," Giles told him. Angel shook his head. "Buffy said goodbye already. She doesn't want to see me again. It'll be to hard for her." "I'm afraid that Buffy is trying to talk herself into not seeing you again. She's afraid..of how she'll act when she sees you leaving her. But, I think what will be harder for her, is when she realizes that she should've said goodbye to you- the right way. And then it'll be too late," Giles said. He paused. "But, I'll tell her for you if that's what you'd like." Angel just stared at him. "I better go," he said after a few seconds,"My train leaves soon." He stood up and walked towards the door. "Very well," Giles said, following him and opening the door for him. "Goodbye," Angel said looking at Giles. "Goodbye, Angel," Giles replied. Angel turned and walked out the door. "Angel," Giles called as he watched Angel walk out into the street. Angel turned around. "You've..been of much help to- us all..over the course of the years we've known you..very much help. And I..thank you for that," Giles said. Angel nodded and turned back around and walked away. Giles watched him walk away. "Poor Buffy," he thought. "I hope he makes the right descision." ****** THE BRONZE While Willow and Oz were dancing, Willow looked over into a dark corner of the Bronze and spotted someone standing alone in the shadows. "Hey, Oz. Can you excuse me for a few minutes? I have to go to the DJ stand to- request a song," Willow told Oz. "Oh, sure. I'll just wait here for you," Oz said. "Ok, I'll be back in a little while," Willow said, then turned and walked over to where Xander and Cordelia were making out. Willow tapped Xander on the shoulder. "Uh, excuse me, Xander- There's something we need to go do," she told him. "Yeah, there is. *You* need to go back on the dance floor and dance with Oz, and *I* need to continue making out with Cordelia," Xander answered. "I'm sorry- I- interrupted your little..thing, but- this is more important," Willow explained. "Right now, nothing could be more important then Cordelia's lips against my lips- or maybe other body parts," Xander told her. Cordelia and Xander started kissing again. "But..it's about Buffy!" Willow told him. Xander broke away from Cordelia. "Well, maybe that." He looked at Cordelia. "Cordy, don't move. I'll be right back..My lips'll miss you- yours," he told her. "Ew! You're leaving me for her! Listen, Xander, If you think you've got me wrapped around your fingers, you're wrong! Ok, cause there's plenty of guys that are dying to go out with me- and some that I'd much rather go out with- and a few of them are here right now, So if I-" Cordelia began shouting at him. Xander grabbed the back of her head and passionately kissed her. "You better hurry up. Wouldn't want one of those stupid single losers to think I'm not with anyone," Cordelia said, changing her mind. Xander turned to a surprised Willow. "These babies are magical," he said pointing to his lips. Willow managed to smile slightly. "So, what's this we have to do for Buffy?" Xander asked following Willow. "Just follow my lead," Willow told him as they headed towards the DJ stand. Willow whispered a request of a song in the DJ's ear, who agreed to play it. "Will, you mind letting me in on the big secret?" Xander asked. Willow nodded. "Well, remember the night.." Willow started and proceeded to tell Xander her plan. Xander looked over at a dark figure in the corner of the Bronze, then looked at a lonely Buffy. "For Buffy's sake, I hope this works," Xander said. Willow nodded. "Me too.. Come on. let's go," she said. The two of them walked over to where Buffy sat. "Hi," Willow said to Buffy. Buffy looked up at the two of them. "Oh, hey guys," she answered. There was a long silence as Willow waited for the right moment to begin talking again. Finally, a new song began playing- the one that Willow had requested. Willow was relieved- her plan was working so far. The words to the song came on. *It's daybreak And you are asleep I can hear you breathe now Your breath is deep* "So, no word from Angel?" Willow asked Buffy, on cue. Buffy looked at Willow, confused. "What are you talking about, Will? Angel and I said goodbye already- last night- maybe it wasn't the best goodbye, but it was goodbye..I thought I told you," she said. Willow just ignored Buffy's question and comments. It did seem a little awkward saying this to her but it was part of her plan. Willow waited a few seconds, then continued. "Well, in a way he sort of is, in the way of that he's right over there," she said motioning to a dark figure in a corner of the Bronze. Buffy, looked at Willow, then at Xander, still quite confused. She then looked over at the figure Willow had pointed out. The person was looking in her direction. It was Angel. Buffy then realized that the things that Willow had just said to her-that weren't making a bit of sense- were the things that Willow said to her the night that Buffy and Angel said their first goodbye to each other, in a way. Buffy played their conversation from that night back in her head. *"So, no word from Angel?" Willow had asked Buffy. "Nah. It's weird, though. In this way, I feel like he's still watching me," Buffy told her. "Well, in a way he sort of is," Willow said, "In the way of that he's right over there," Willow said pointing to a dark figure that was staring in Buffy's direction..Angel.* Even the song that was playing right then- "I'll Remember You," by Sophie Zelmani- that was the same song that was playing that night too- Although, Willow had set it up that way. *But before I go I look at you one last time I can heat a heartbeat Is it yours or is it mine?* Buffy looked back at her two best friends. Xander motioned his head in Angel's direction, signaling her to go over to him. Buffy looked over at Willow, then back at Xander. She was hesitant about going over to him, afraid that it would be too hard to say goodbye. But then she gave her friends a smile, a silent thank you and turned and began slowly approaching Angel. Xander turned to Willow. Willow had a grin on her face as she watched Buffy and Angel approach each other. She was happy that her planned had worked out- bringing Buffy and Angel together to say goodbye that way they should have the night before. She knew it would make Buffy happier- although maybe just the slightest bit. "So, guess this is my cue to say ,'I don't need to watch because I'm not threatened. I'm just gonna look this way,'" Xander said grinning. Willow smiled. The two of them watched as Buffy and Angel approached each other. When they met, towards the center of the Bronze, Buffy looked up at Angel, greeting him with a smile. Angel just stared down at her, a sad look on his face. *I look at your lips I know how soft they can be Did they know what they wanted the times they kissed me?" Angel finally spoke. "I couldn't leave here without saying a proper goodbye to you," he told Buffy. Buffy just looked up at him and nodded slightly. Angel sighed. "I need to know that you're going to be alright...I know, that it's going to take awhile, but I need to know that, in time...you'll move on..find someone else to love... Someone you can start a family with..someone you can grow old, and die with," Angel told her. He continued. "Someone you can watch the sunset with, before you go to bed at night..and- watch it rise with when you walk up in the morning...'Cause you deserve that, Buffy..you do. And I- need you to promise that you'll do that,Buffy...for me." Buffy's eyes held unshed tears as she stared up at him. She shook her head slightly. "I don't know if I can do that, Angel..I can't-just- forget you and move on. You're too much a part of me. I'm sorry, but- I can't make that promise," she told him. "Look, I know it all seems too hard right now- but I need to know that you'll try, at least," he said. "Do that for me, Buffy?" he asked. Buffy looked at him for a few seconds, then nodded. "I will..try, I mean." Angel gave her a slight smile. He felt slightly better knowing that she'd one day be happy again. "I have something for you," Angel told her, reaching into his pocket. "It's not much, really- but it's, a goodbye present." He held a velvet jewelry box in his hands. Buffy looked down at it in his hands. *And your hands that I held in mine Now they're reposing on the pillow Will they ever miss me some time?* She looked up at Angel. Finally, he handed her the box. "Don't open it, just now," Angel told her. "Wait- until I'm gone..When you really need to- when the pain is too much- open it then," he told her. Buffy nodded. "I, um, actually, have something for you, too. I was- gonna leave it by your door but- well, you're here now," she said. Buffy reached into her pocket and pulled out a small velvet pouch bag and handed it to him. "There's just a little something in there to remember me by..in case you forget," she told him. Angel shook his head. "I won't ever forget you, Buffy..I won't," he swore to her. Buffy knew that he meant it. She'd never forget him either. Ever. He'd always be in her heart, just as she'd always be in his. *I'll remember you You will be there in my heart I'll remember you And that is all that I can do But I'll remember* Buffy remembered that she had something else for him. She reached in her pocket and pulled out a cassette tape. "This is for you, too. It's- a tape of this song-that- kinda reflects the way I feel bout you leaving..You can- play it while you open the bag-or, whenever. I know I don't know your musical taste but- I just had to give it you. The song just- seems like it was written for us," Buffy told him. Angel nodded and placed the two items in his pocket. He looked back down at Buffy. They stared at each other for a few seconds. Buffy could tell that Angel had something on his mind. She knew it was probably the fact that he was leaving and they'd no longer be together, but she had to ask anyway. "Is there- something else on your mind?" she asked him softly. "It's nothing- It's just *this*... It's just so-," Angel began. Buffy knew what he was going to say. "Painful," she said, finishing his sentence for him. "I know." "I wish things could be different, Buffy," he told her. Buffy nodded. "I know," she agreed. "Me too." Buffy shrugged slightly. "Well, it's getting kind of late. You should probably go now, or- you'll miss your train," she told him. As much as Buffy hated having to say that, it was the truth. Angel nodded. "I know," he whispered. Buffy stared up at him. Angel leaned down towards her face slightly. Buffy just stared into his eyes. He leaned forward a few more inches until his lips met hers for a soft kiss. The power between the two of them brought their lips together again, as they kissed again. Buffy closed her eyes, wrapped up in the moment, as Angel did the same. *Your eyes that always make me shiver Now they are closed They just sometimes twitch a little* As Angel's arms wrapped tightly around her, Buffy moved her hand to Angel's face and brought her other arm around his neck, deepening their kiss. As they shared this passionate kiss goodbye, Buffy was reminded of the first time they kissed goodbye- when they first decided that they shouldn't be together. Their conversation just a minute ago was even similar to the one they had that night. *"I just wanted to see if you were ok, and your mother," Angel said when they finally reached each other. "We're both good..you?" Buffy asked. "If I can go a little while without being shot or stabbed, I'll be alright," he answered with a slight chuckle. He became more serious. "Look, this can't.." he started. "Ever-be anything" Buffy finished, "I know. For one thing your like two hundred and twenty four years older then I am," she said with a smile. "I just gotta..I gotta walked away from this," Angel told her. Buffy nodded. "I know, me too....One of us has to go here," she said. Angel nodded slightly. "I know," he said in a whisper, then leaned in and kissed her.* Their kiss was even during the same song-although, again, Willow had arranged that. But Buffy knew that this would be their last kiss goodbye. And unlike the previous time, this one was goodbye forever. Buffy held on tighter to Angel as they kissed, not wanting to ever let go. Savoring the feel of his body close to hers for the last time. *And your body I could hold for an hour It sent me to heaven With it's heat and power* Slowly, Buffy and Angel pulled apart, looking deeply into each other's eyes as they did so. Tears were in both of their eyes. As soon as Angel saw Buffy's face filled with tears, he pulled her back into his embrace, wrapping his arms tightly around her tiny body, hugging her close to him. Angel stroked the back of her hair as he held her. After a few seconds, they pulled away again. "I have to go now," Angel told Buffy softly. "Ok," she said trying not to make it any harder for them. She tried to hold back the tears from pouring down her face again, but one had already slipped out of her eye. Then another, then another. Angel moved his hand to her cheeks and wiped some of the tears from her eyes. Buffy grabbed his hand and held it against her cheek. She closed her eyes a she took in the feel of his touch for the last time. Then she guided his hand down to her lips and kissed the back of it. Angel closed his own eyes as she did this. Slowly, Buffy moved his hand down to rest beneath her chin. Tears were forming in Angel's eyes again. He was wishing more then ever that he wasn't a vampire- so that none of this would have to happen. So that he wouldn't have to leave the girl that he loved more then anything in the world. "Please don't go, Angel. Please. I can't do this without you..I can't- live without you, Angel. Please don't leave me," Buffy pleaded with him as tears ran down her pale cheeks. She knew that she was being unfair to him saying this, but she couldn't help but say how she felt at that moment. Angel's eyes flooded with tears. He would have done anything for Buffy. Anything, He'd give the world to her- if she asked for it. But staying in Sunnydale was one thing he could not d o for her. He would not put her in danger of Spike's attempts at using him to restore Druscilla or trying to make him a normal vampire again. Angel placed his gentle hand back to rest on the side of Buffy's face. He caressed her cheek lightly. Tears continued to roll down both of their cheeks. "Buffy, when I got my soul back, I never once thought that I'd be able to love again or that anyone could ever love me..But..when I met you, things changed..I fell in love with you, you were able to fall in love with me. And I- was the happiest I'd ever been in all my life-because you made me feel complete- you made me feel, almost- human..because you made me feel loved. Of course, there was still loneliness, still pain, but there was love too- The love I had for you and the love you had for me. And it was the greatest thing that could ever happen to me-you gave me the greatest thing the greatest gift off all..your love, your heart. And I thank you for that, Buffy. I'd love to give something more then just my love-and my heart for you- in return, but staying here..I can't do. You know that, Buffy..You know that if it were in any way possible to stay here with you, I would..But I can't, with this," Angel told her. He continued. "You mean the world to me Buffy. And I'll never stop missing you, never stop loving you..Your eyes, your hair, your lips, your warmth, your smile, your touch..I'll never stop," he told her. Buffy stared at him with tears rolling down her cheeks. Angel pulled her close to him again, giving her one last, soft kiss on her lips. It didn't last as long as the previous one, but it was still magical. Angel pulled away from her slowly. He looked at her for a few more seconds. "Goodbye, Buffy," he said, softly. Buffy tried to say something but words couldn't escape her mouth, only sobs. She just stood there looking at him with tears pouring out of her eyes. Angel looked at her for one more moment, then turned and headed towards the exit of the Bronze. Buffy watched him walk away from her. "Angel..don't go," Buffy whispered, mainly to herself, in tears. Angel passed where Willow and Xander were standing. They, too, watched as he headed towards the door. Xander shook his head in disgust, then turned towards Willow. "He walks right past us, knowing that he'll never again see our faces, and he doesn't even say goodbye?!? The nerve of some vampires!" he said. Willow shrugged. "He said goodbye to me...He- came by my house the other night- and- said goodbye," Willow told him. Xander shook his head again. Just before reaching the door, Angel paused. He turned to look back at Buffy one last time. He'd never see her beautiful face again. "I love you," he whispered to her, then turned and walked out of the bronze. Buffy wiped some of the tears from her eyes, only to have more pour from them again. "Goodbye, Angel" she whispered in between sobs, "I love you too," she said staring at the now empty space in front of the door, as the song that was playing ended. *I'll remember you You will be there in my heart I'll remember you And that is all that I can do But I'll remember* TO BE CONTINUED _________________________________________________________ DO YOU YAHOO!? Get your free @yahoo.com address at http://mail.yahoo.com - - ------------------------------ Date: Sun, 22 Mar 1998 11:16:02 -0800 (PST) From: michele v Subject: BUFFYFIC: Our Hearts Will Go On 6/6 TITLE: Our Hearts Will Go On 6/6 AUTHOR: Michele V. EMAIL ADDRESS: glynisgrl33@yahoo.com FEEDBACK: Definitely, especially since this is my first fic.RATING: PG SUMMARY: A Buffy/Angel story that takes place after "What's My Line 1 & 2" with some added Willow/Oz and Xander/Cordelia. Also, Buffy and the gang find out SPOILERS: All episodes through "What's My Line 1 & 2" about the return of the Master-in some form. DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters except for "The Elgradora" All of the other characters belong to Joss Whedon and the WB. No copywrite infringement intended. NOTE: I Wrote this after "What's My Line 2," therefor without knowing that something similar would *sort of* happen in "Surprise" ********** PART 6 SUNDAY NIGHT(THE NEXT DAY) Buffy walked into her bedroom, slammed the door shut behind her, and threw herself onto her bed, crying hysterically. While she was on her way home from Willow's, a vampire, that knew Angel had left Sunnydale, jumped out at her- and began harassing Buffy about his leaving. It had gotten to the point where Buffy did not have the mental capability or strength to fight him, so she just broke down in tears and ran home, where she now lay crying on her bed. Buffy hugged the leather jacket she held - that Angel had given her awhile back, close to her. She closed her eyes for a moment, pretending that it was Angel that she was holding. Reality of course kicked in when she opened her eyes, seconds later. Buffy couldn't take the pain anymore, it was all too much for her. She knew what it was time for. It was time to open it- the goodbye present that Angel had given her the night before. He told her to wait until she needed to open it- and at that moment she needed to. She a piece of him with her now. Something new. Buffy reached over and opened the drawer to the night table next to her bed. She took out the small velvet jewelry box, that was tucked neatly inside of it and closed the drawer again. She climbed under her covers, sitting up in bed and set the box down next to her. She reached back over to her night table and popped a cd that had been laying out, into her cd player and pressed play. She then settled herself back upright in bed. She picked up the small box again and stared down at it in her hands. ******* Angel walked into his new apartment, closing the door behind him. He threw his leather jacket on a nearby chair and placed his keys down on the coffee table. He walked over to his bed and sat down on it. With his head hung down, he ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. He was thinking of Buffy. How he missed her so much. Angel looked back up and noticed the small pouch bag that Buffy had given him the night before, lying on the night table next to his bed. He decided that it was time. Time to open it up. Before doing anything, he grabbed the cassette tape that was lying next to it, that Buffy also had given him, put it in his tape player and pressed play. He then picked up the small velvet bag, staring down at it in his hands. ****** Buffy slowly and carefully opened up the small box- afraid that something might fall out of it. When she saw what was inside of it, her eyes began to flood with tears again. ****** After a few seconds, Angel finally opened up the bag. Inside was a small cardboard box. Angel took it out of the bag and carefully opened it up. What he saw inside of it brought tears to his eyes. ****** Inside the box that Angel had given Buffy, was the long chained gold cross that Angel had always worn. Underneath it, a small sheet of paper, that Buffy could tell had something written on it. ****** Inside the box that Buffy had given Angel, was the silver cross necklace that Angel had given Buffy for protection the first time they met. The one that was almost always around Buffy's neck. Taped to the inside lid of the box was a picture of Buffy and underneath the necklace, a small envelope. ****** The words to the song that both Buffy and Angel had playing in their tape players finally came on. - -"Every night in my dreams I see you, I feel you That is how I know you go on" Buffy, sitting on her bed with tears in her eyes, began thinking about all her times with Angel. Angel, sat on his bed as memories of all his times with Buffy played through his head. The beautiful song continued, serving as almost background music to their thoughts. - -"Far across the distance And spaces between us You have come to show you go on" The two thought about the first time they met, outside of the Bronze.. *'Is there a problem mam?' Angel asked after Buffy had slammed his body to the ground. 'There's a problem,' Buffy shot back,'Why are you following me?' 'I know what you're thinking, but don't worry, I don't bite' Angel answered her. 'Who are you?' Buffy asked later on. 'Let's just say, I'm a friend,' Angel told her. 'Yeah, well maybe I don't want a friend,' Buffy shot at him. 'I didn't say I was yours,' he answered.* - -"Near, far Wherever you are I believe that the heart does go on" The two looked down at each other's necklaces that they held in the boxes in their hands. ******** A tear fell from Buffy's eyes onto Angel's necklace. Buffy wiped it off quickly, leaving her fingers to rest on the cross. ***** - -"Once more You open the door And you're here in my heart And my heart will go on and on" ****** Angel ran a finger over Buffy's cross. It hurt, burned, a little. But it was nothing compared to the hurt he was feeling without Buffy in his life. ****** - -"Love can touch us one time And last for a lifetime And never let go till we're gone" They thought about their first kiss, in Buffy's bedroom-when she first found out he was a vampire. *'I did a lot of thinking today. I really can't be around you because when I am..' Angel started to tell her.'Hey, no big,' Buffy interrupted,'Water..over the bridge, under the bridge...' 'All I can ever think about is how badly I want to kiss you,' Angel admitted. 'Over the dam...kiss me?' Buffy said looking up at him in shock. 'I'm older then you and this can't ever...I better go,' he said. 'H-how much older?' Buffy asked. 'I should..' Angel began. 'Go,' Buffy said approaching him, 'You said.' Angel looked down at her and they kissed. They kissed again. Buffy put her arm around him as Angel put his around her. The kiss went on for several seconds. Suddenly Angel pulled away. 'What? What is it? What's wrong?' Buffy asked. Angel turned to face her and growled. Buffy screamed seeing that his face was then that of a vampire. Angel took one last look at her and jumped out of her window.* - -"Love was when I loved you One true time I hold on to In my life we'll always go on" They thought about the time they were in the graveyard and Angel admitted that he was jealous of Xander. *'Love makes you do the wacky,' Buffy told Angel. 'What?" Angel asked. 'Crazy stuff,' Buffy explained. 'Oh. Crazy, like a two hundred and forty one year old being jealous of a high school junior?' Angel asked referring to himself. 'Are you fessing up?' Buffy asked him. 'I thought about it. Maybe it bothers me a little,' Angel admitted. 'I don't love Xander,' Buffy told him. 'Yeah, but he's in your life. He gets to be there when I can't. Take your classes, eat your meals, hear your jokes and complaints...He gets to see you in the sunlight,' Angel reminded her. 'I don't look that good in direct light,' Buffy told him. Angel looked at her for a moment.'Well, it'll be mourning soon,' Angel said looking up at the sky. 'I should probably go. I could walk you home,' Buffy told him. They stared at each other for a long moment. Finally Angel held out his hand. Buffy took in and they began to walk hand in hand.* "Near, far Wherever you are I believe that the heart does go on" The two thought about a time at the Bronze when Buffy wanted to give Angel his jacket back, but he refused. *'I heard a rumor that there was, uh, one last vampire walking around making a nuisance of himself,' Angel said coming up behind Buffy at the Bronze. 'There is. Guess I should thank you for the tip,' Buffy said. 'Pleasure's mine,' Angel told her. 'Course it would make things easier if I knew how to get in touch with you,' she told him. 'I'll be around,' he said. 'Or who you were,' Buffy continued. Angel smiled and walked around to the other side of her. 'Well, anyways, you can have your jacket back,' she said referring to the leather jacket he gave her that she was wearing then. 'It looks better on you,' Angel told her. He then turned and left. Buffy stared after him. Angel gave her another look aback then disappeared into the crowd.* - -"Once, more You open the door And you're here in my heart And my heart will go on and on" They thought about the time at the ice skating rink when Angel had his game face on and didn't want Buffy to see him like that. *'Are you ok?' Angel asked Buffy after she had just fought with a member of the order of Teraka. Buffy skated over to him. She put a gloved hand on his face, noticing the cut above his eye. 'What about you? That cut!' Buffy said moved her hand towards his cut. Angel moved his head, shrugging her hand off. 'Forget about me. This is bad Buffy. We gotta get you outta here,' he told her. 'What, you mean hide?' she asked. 'Let's just get you some place safe!' he answered her. 'No! Your eye!' Buffy said reaching back up to touch his cut. He shook her off again. 'Hey, don't be a baby. I'm not gonna hurt you,' she told him. 'It's not that,' Angel said. 'What?' Buffy asked. 'You shouldn't have to touch me when I'm like this,' he told her. Buffy looked up into his vampire features. 'Oh,' she said. She removed the glove from her hand and moved her hand across his brow and wound, brushing gently down his cheek. 'I didn't even notice,' she told him softly. She moved closer to him and kissed him. Angel responds, and the kiss becomes more passionate.* Angel and Buffy's thoughts subsided as they looked back down at the small boxes they held in their hands. ******* Angel ran his hand over the picture of Buffy that was taped to the box. Tears were pouring from his eyes as he looked at her beautiful face. Looking at Buffy's picture and having her silver cross with him, made him feel as though a part of Buffy was still with him. Angel slipped his hand under the necklace and pulled out the small envelope that was underneath it. He opened it up and took out the piece of paper that was folded neatly inside of it. He unfolded it and read what it said. ********* Buffy picked up Angel's necklace and held it in her hands. She carefully brought it over her head and around her neck. She then up the cross part again and brought it to her lips. Gently, she kissed it, then let it go again, allowing it hang around her neck. With it around her neck, it made her feel as though a pice of him was with her. Buffy then reached back into the small velvet box and took out the piece of paper that was folded inside it. She unfolded it and read what was written in it. - -"You're here There's nothing I fear And I know that my heart will go on" ******* Written on the sheet of paper that was inside the envelope that Angel found inn the box Buffy had given him was the following: Dear Angel, My heart for you will go on. Yours truly, Buffy Angel stared down at those words as even more tears flooded his eyes. ****** Buffy's eyes flooded with tears as she read the words written on the piece of paper Angel included in the box he had given her. The note read: My heart for you Buffy, will go on forever. Love, Angel ****** Tears in their eyes,the two of them listened as the last verse of the song played over both their tape players, staring down at the notes they held in their hands. - -"We'll stay Forever this way You are safe in my heart And my heart will go on and on" ****** Buffy wiped some tears from her eyes as the song ended. She placed the velvet box and note she held on the table beside her bed. She then nestled under her covers. ***** Angel wiped some of the tears from his eyes as the song ended and placed the small cardboard box with Buffy's necklace and note in it on his night table. He positioned it so that her picture would be facing him when he lay in bed. He then got into bed and pulled the covers over him. ****** Before closing her eyes Buffy brought the cross part of Angel's necklace that she still wore around her neck- up to her lips again. She kissed it again. "I love you, Angel," she whispered, then let go of it again and went to sleep. ****** Before closing his eyes, Angel reached over to the box that lay on his night table. He touched Buffy's silver cross, letting his fingers rest on it, despite the pain he felt. "I love you, Buffy," he whispered then took his hand away again and went to sleep. ****** In the darkness of the two rooms, two crosses sparkled. One gold. One silver. It was a sign. A sign, that Buffy and Angel's love, their heart, for each other would go on forever. And although they were no longer physically together, in their hearts, in their dreams, they would always be. All of a sudden the song came on again in both of the rooms as Buffy and Angel slept, dreaming of each other. Neither of them had turned it back on..they were both asleep. Maybe it was another sign. It must've been. - -"Every night in my dreams I see you, I feel you That is how I know you go on Far across the distance And spaces between us You have come to show you go on Near, far Wherever you are I believe that the heart does go on Once, more You open the door And you're here in my heart And my heart will go on and on Love can touch us one time And last for a life time And never let go till we're gone Love was when I loved you One true time I hold on to In my life we'll always go on Near, far Wherever you are I believe that the heart does go on Once, more You open the door And you're here in my heart And my heart will go on and on You're here There's nothing I fear And I know that my heart will go on We'll stay Forever this way You are safe in my heart And my heart will go on and on" It's not certain whether the song playing again by itself was a sign or not. But one thing *was* for certain. Their hearts-for each other- would go on. THE END. _________________________________________________________ DO YOU YAHOO!? Get your free @yahoo.com address at http://mail.yahoo.com - - ------------------------------ End of Buffyfic-digest V2 #69 ***************************** To subscribe to buffyfic or buffyfic-digest, send the command subscribe buffyfic-digest or subscribe buffyfic to majordomo@xmission.com. You will need to go through a confirmation process, and the listowners have to manually approve your subscription request, so it may take some time. Back issues of this digest can be found at: ftp://ftp.xmission.com/pub/lists/buffyfic/archive/ Dalton Spence has also provided an index of the buffyfic archive at: http://www.hwcn.org/~ag775/BUFFYFIC.HTM For help, contact Jill Kirby (jtkirby@mcs.com) or sah (romana@mindspring.com)