From: owner-buffyfic@lists.xmission.com (buffyfic-digest) To: buffyfic-digest@lists.xmission.com Subject: buffyfic-digest V2 #107 Reply-To: $SENDER Sender: owner-buffyfic@lists.xmission.com Errors-To: owner-buffyfic@lists.xmission.com Precedence: bulk buffyfic-digest Tuesday, April 7 1998 Volume 02 : Number 107 In this issue: BUFFYFIC: Hope 1 of 44/45 BUFFYFIC: Hope 2 of 44/45 See the end of the digest for information on (un)subscribing to the buffyfic or buffyfic-digest mailing lists and on how to retrieve back issues. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Tue, 07 Apr 1998 15:39:06 PDT From: "Sara Barton" Subject: BUFFYFIC: Hope 1 of 44/45 A: Sara B. T: Hope D: I don't own 'em! Part 44 PG If you get offended by religion, I’d advise you not to read this. Buffy looked at her clock. 10:00 a.m. Almost two days since she first learned about the fate of Angel, since she first met Hope. Her thoughts wandered to Darla. She was still in a bit of shock at seeing her alive and well. < At lease I killed her. I only wished I had done the same to Spike and Drusilla > She thought. Buffy had searched the old caverns for the two vampires, but all she found were three minions, and she took care of them easily. < Where the hell did they go? > Her anger began to build at the thought of Spike and Drusilla still alive. They caused her so much pain..... They took away Angel. < Angel is gone. I will never see him again > She stared at the window. < We never made love....I wanted to give myself to him > She shook her head, trying to rid her head of those thought. No matter how hard she tried to push him out of her head, her thoughts always came back to him. The feel of his arms around her body, his lips on hers, his fingers in her hair....the warmth and security she felt when he was around. It was all gone. Her heart had been torn into a million pieces when she watched him turn to dust. When she watched the most important thing in her life die. When her world fell apart. < NO! I won’t let that happen. I promised him I would move on. And I will do that....I will move on...> Buffy threw back the covers and stood up. Her knees felt like putty and she grasped onto the bedpost for support until she felt strong enough to walk. Her loss of blood had weakened her, and it would be a few days until she was back up to full strength. If it had been anyone else--they would have died. She walked to her closet and dressed herself, putting on a pair of shorts and a dark blue tank top. Flipping on her stereo, she walked to her mirror listening to the morning DJ announce the news. “For local news, Sunnydale High School is closed for repairs. Apparently, the generator was tampered with, causing the power to shut off. Officials say a wooden stake was shoved into it, causing enough damage to keep the power out for a week. Repairs will start tomorrow, and hopefully the school will re-open next week.” Buffy smirked slightly, imagining the priceless look on Snyder’s face when he found out. She looked into the mirror, brushing her hair. Her bare face stared back at hers, and she realized she wasn’t wearing her cross. Picking up the silver cross Angel had given to her, she put it round her neck. Buffy grabbed the two claddagh rings and in her palm, and kissed them, then slowly placed one on each hand. Gazing at her reflection, she wiped her tears away. “Buffy....” a voice whispered as a gust of wind blew through her open window. Her skin crawled with a shudder. < That voice...I know that voice...> Slowly bringing her head up, her heart stopped completely. “Angel!!!” She gasped, nearly jumping out of her skin at the site of his reflection in her mirror. She couldn’t take her eyes off of him. He stood by the window, the angelic smile lightening up his face. He held his hand outstretched to her. Buffy....” he whispered again, urging her to come to him. Her heart raced and she spun around, eager to see him. Disappointment stabbed her heart as she looked around the room to find herself alone. She stared at the spot where he had stood, desperate to see him, but knowing he wasn’t there. She turned back to the mirror, his image gone. “He was there...” Buffy said quietly to herself, trying to manage her heartbreak. She leaned against her dresser, thinking of the bizarre occurrence. “And now for the number one song of the week. The movie has been at the top of the box office since it’s release in December, and the song, sung by the beautiful Celine Dione, along with the soundtrack, is number one in America. Here is “My Heart Will Go On” from “Titanic”. “Every night in my dreams, I see you, I feel you, That is how I know you go on. Far across the distance and spaces between us You have come to show you go on. Near, Far, where ever you are I believe that the heart does go on Once more, you open the door And you’re here in my heart, And my heart will go on and on. Buffy listened to the sorrowful melody with more of a familiarity than she would have liked to have. Her soul ached and it felt like her insides were being ripped from her body as a knife punctured her still beating heart. Love can touch us one time and last for a lifetime, And never let go till we’re gone. Love was when I loved you, one true time I hold to. In my life we’ll always go on. In a fit of sobs she slammed her hand against the ‘off’ button on her stereo, the force almost knocking the unit off the shelf. She quickly pulled on her white Keds and bolted out the door. Buffy ran to the stairs, tripping over a bag that lay in her path. She fell down the first two steps, but grasped onto the railing and pulled herself up. Running down the rest of the steps, Buffy nearly knocked her mother over as she got to the bottom. “Honey! What’s the matter?!” Joyce yelled, intensely worried. Buffy ignored her flew open the front door. She ran and ran, not stopping until the pain in her body forced her to. Looking around, she realized she was in the park. Her chest heaving, Buffy tried to catch her breath between the sobs that engulfed her. She walked to the lake that resided in the midst of a few benches, trees, and patches of grass. The glistening, cerulean water sparkled under the hot morning sun. The sky was an endless terrain of pale blue, and the air seemed fresh with new life ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com - - ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 07 Apr 1998 15:41:08 PDT From: "Sara Barton" Subject: BUFFYFIC: Hope 2 of 44/45 A: Sara B. T: Hope D: I don't own 'em! 2/44/45 Buffy slowly sat down on a bench, watching the ducks swim happily, like they had no cares in the world. Wiping her tears, she sniffled, and took a deep breath. “Oh!” She exclaimed, feeling something furry rub against her legs. Buffy and looked down to see a white fluffy kitten purring heartily next to her. She smiled, and it looked up at her, meowing. “Hi there, kitty,” she said, petting its soft fur. She picked him up, and he rubbed his head along her cheek affectionately. “What’s your name?” She asked, feeling for a collar but finding none. The kitten’s eyes were like shiny pools of blue, and it’s fur was like a snow bank. He purred in content as he lay on the bench beside her. “You look like an Angel,” she whispered, noticing the cats angelic features. “That’s what I’ll call you. Angel.” Buffy stood up, and stretched her legs. A warm, tingling sensation crept through her body. The same feeling she got when a vampire was near. She turned around, finding herself alone. Shuddering, Buffy looked to see that the kitten was gone. Frowning, she searched for him. Seeing him over by a tree, she called for him. “Here, kitty kitty. Here Angel. Come here.” Buffy watched him trot across the street, and up the stairs of an old church that had been deserted for some time. “Why is he going in there?” She asked aloud, following the small kitten. He looked at her from the top of the stairs, and ran in through the ajar door. She wanted very much to follow him, but the old building slightly frightened her. It was Sunnydale’s oldest and largest church, strangely out of place in the small town. The church resembled an old 17th century gothic cathedral. It was built over two hundred years ago, and still stood grandly. Tall towers with tiers of openings and slender stone spires marked it’s illustrious exterior. Along the sides flying buttresses stood out from the wall and bore pinnacles and tracery as well as carved figures and fantastic gargoyles. At the doors at the end of the nave, were elaborate symbolic sculptural compositions of Biblical scenes and saints. Above there was a huge round stained-glass rose window. The large doors at it’s entrance were over ten feet tall, and were painstakingly carved with elaborate detail. Above the door, a phrase was carved in the stone. “Non nobis, Domine, non nobis, sed nomini tuo da gloriam,” translated to “Not to us, O Lord, not to us, but to your name be glory.” The same was first written on the on the medieval facade of the church of St. Hubert in Troyes. Buffy stared at the large cathedral. Her senses screamed for her not to enter, but her soul was pulling her in. She walked up the small staircase and slowly pulled the heavy door open. She stepped inside, amazed at it’s interior. Large stained glass windows filled the room, the rich colors adding to the splendor of the interior. Scenes from the Bible, figures of saints, and representations of Virtues and Vices lined the walls. The curved ceiling was immaculate, and tall, details pillars gave the room an ancient feeling. She was reminded of the picture she saw in her history textbook of the Pantheon in Paris. Awe struck her as she walked down the aisle, between the old pews. Liturgical candles filled the enormous room, giving off a warm glow and an inviting feeling. At the end of the red carpet, a crucifix was mounted on the wall, and a small table was below it. A small statue of the Virgin Mary sat in it’s center, with small white candles circling in. A wooden cross lying in front of it. “Hello? Anybody here?!” Buffy yelled. “HEELLLLOOOOO?!?!?!” All she herd was the sound of her voice echoing in the cathedral. “I guess this place _is_ deserted.” She looked at the table and walked up to it. She stood, watching the flame on the candles dance happily. Buffy had never been a religious person, but something urged her to say a prayer. Keeling, she picked up a long match out of a box that rested beside the table. Lighting it’s tip, Buffy looked up at the crucifix and then at the Virgin Mary. Only two candles remained unlit, and she brought the flame to the first one. “This is for Angel,” she whispered, lighting it. It burned brightly, the gentle radiance of the warm glow playing off her face. She brought the flame to the second one. “This is for Hope,” she whispered, and did the same. Placing her palms together, she closed her eyes and quietly prayed. “Dear God,” she began, her voice low and steady. “I love Angel with all of my heart, and right now, I feel like dying because he isn’t with me. He is my heart, and my soul, and I am empty inside without him. Please keep him safe in heaven, and please, forgive him for what he had done. He needs that, and so do I.” Her voice cracked as she weeped, her sobs echoing in the empty church. “And please, tell him I love him, and that I will miss him till the day I die. Thank you. Amen.” Buffy wiped her eyes, and stood up slowly. Giving the candles one last look, she blew them out. She turned to face the door, and saw the kitten standing in front of it. The sunlight from ceiling window shown down on him, illuminating his presence. She watched him watching her. His poise proper, and his long fur blowing softly in the wind. She walked up to Angel and he immediately rubbed against her legs affectionately. *Meow* his high voice rang out to her. She smiled, and bent down to pick him up. Holding the small kitten in her arms, she rubbed his head lovingly. She gave him a kiss, and set him back down. “Bye, Angel,” she said, and turned to walk away, leaving the large cathedral. Strolling down the street, she rubbed her arms and felt the hot sun on her skin. The prayer had made Buffy feel better, and for once she was at peace with their deaths. Angel followed her, desperately trying to keep up with her. *Meow* *Meow*. She looked behind her, stopping momentarily so he could catch up. “Do you want to come home with me” She asked. He meowed loudly, as if he could understand her. She beamed happily. Picking Angel up, she held him in her arms as she walked home. - --------------------------------------------------------- Some excepts from Compton’s Interactive Encyclopedia Copyright © 1993, 1994 Compton’s NewMedia, Inc. ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com - - ------------------------------ End of buffyfic-digest V2 #107 ****************************** To subscribe to buffyfic or buffyfic-digest, send the command subscribe buffyfic-digest or subscribe buffy to majordomo@xmission.com. You will need to go through a confirmation process, and the listowners have to manually approve your subscription request, so it may take some time. 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