From: owner-buffyfic@lists.xmission.com (buffyfic-digest) To: buffyfic-digest@lists.xmission.com Subject: buffyfic-digest V2 #182 Reply-To: $SENDER Sender: owner-buffyfic@lists.xmission.com Errors-To: owner-buffyfic@lists.xmission.com Precedence: bulk buffyfic-digest Tuesday, May 12 1998 Volume 02 : Number 182 In this issue: BUFFYFIC: VA- Step six -Acceptance, (7/7) by Andrea BUFFYFIC: "Future Imperfect" -- Chapter Seven BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (part 18) BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (part 19) See the end of the digest for information on (un)subscribing to the buffyfic or buffyfic-digest mailing lists and on how to retrieve back issues. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Tue, 12 May 1998 09:27:58 PDT From: "Andrea Newbery" Subject: BUFFYFIC: VA- Step six -Acceptance, (7/7) by Andrea Disclaimers in part one Angel stood at the front of the room, just finishing his talk. "So, in conclusion I would like to say that I am grateful to all of you for your support and especially to Buffy for being Buffy." The applause as Angel finished his speech startled him out of his memories. Looking around at all of the faces he smiled. They had all come so far since last year. He had come so far. They had bought a house and he didn't mind helping the slayer. There was nothing better than working out his issues on a soulless demon. Drucilla grabbed his hand then, he turned to her smiling, "Did you enjoy Angel's little talk lov'?" She smiled at him and for one moment he was so thankful to Antoine for saving him. "Let's go home and take the dogs for a walk." Just then Xander headed back up to the front of the room and started talking again, introducing other vampires who wanted to talk. Thinking that these people talked way to much Spike drifted back into his memories of the past year. Back when they were still living in the factory and Dru hadn't decided she was the vampire version of Dr. Doolittle. That began two months after their souls had been restored. He remembered that night, how she wanted only one bird. "Spike...Spike I want a new bird, one that lives." Dru stared at him with that vunerable look that got him everytime. He'd been unable to say no to her when he was run by a demon, with this soul he was basically her slave. She hadn't realized that yet, she would eventually. "A bird Dru? Are you sure you want to take that chance?" He would do anything for her even if it meant getting another squaking bird that because of his soul he wouldn't be able to ignore as it died. A bird that would live for years and years and years chirping incessantly. "Willow told me of a place in town were people take abandoned animals, she said there were a few birds there. Please Spike?" She peered at him through her bangs, a pouty smile on her lips. "Of course you can have a bird my princess. Do I ever deny you anything?" He hadn't, that was half the problem. He couldn’t believe Willow had told her this. It was enough to make him feel a little miffed at Willow. She seemed quite determined to destroy his life. Now she's telling Dru about animal shelters, the soul restoration hadn't been enough for her? She said she hadn't meant to restore his soul. Not that he could complain about it, he was supposed to be grateful. Grateful that he could have a demon inside him begging him to kill and a soul that said he couldn't? Not that he wanted to kill exactly, it was just easier before. Angel would probably even agree with that. If you were pouring holy water on him at the time. "Can we go tonight, they're open til eight. Miss Edith wants a bird tonight." He hadn't known Druscilla before she'd lost her soul and he could admit to being a bit disappointed that her soul was as loopy as the rest of her. But he loved her and that was that. He liked being her protecter. "Sure baby, as soon as the sun sets we go." And with that he had sealed his fate. The trip to the shelter turned out to be the first of many. The one bird quickly turned into three birds, two dogs and a cat. And that was only in the first week. The factory turned into a foul smelling animal shelter leading to a mass exodus of the other vampires. Dru with soul was much more conscientious about feeding her animals, but regretably not so much about cleaning up after them. Which didn't really matter for long once Dru visited Willow at her house and decided that she wanted one of her own. Not a nice little apartment like Angel, but a house with bedrooms they would never use and a basement that they would. He had managed to put away a little money over the years, but not a lot. He'd always figured that he could just steal more if he needed it. Now with his soul and everything he couldn't do that. He was fairly sure there was some guideline about it. But Dru wanted a house so he found a realtor who could show them around at night and they bought a house. A very expensive house. He tried to explain to Dru that they didn't have all the money in the world, but she just pouted and continued shopping for furnishings. He was fairly sure he would be the first vampire to go bankrupt. At the very least be the first vampire to get a job. Angel had tons of money, he had over a hundred years to invest, guess that's what you do when you can't kill. Angel would give him the money if he asked, not that he would ever ask him. He would much rather get a job at the 7-11. Which wasn't such a bad idea, he could work the graveyard shift, it's not like getting shot would hurt him that much. So he went out the next day to try and find a job. Wasn't as easy as he hoped. He had gotten some fake documentation to open his bank accounts but he hadn't thought about fake experience. The humiliation of it, teenagers telling him he wasn't qualified to sell cigarettes. That was when guideline two had come into existance. The kid really had it coming. He hadn't kill the brat but he had certainly messed with his mind a little bit. Well, maybe a lot. Everyone was pretty ticked at him for that little incident. He'd been on the naughty vampire list for over two weeks. He hadn't meant to scare him so much but the kid had been so rude. He gave up on the job idea after that. Angel had given him a loan and taught him how to play the stockmarket. Another thing Angel held over his head without ever saying a word. He was better at it than Angel was anyway, he paid him back in less than three months. Everything had actually been fine for a while except he gradually noticed that Willow seemed to be visiting Dru more and more. He remembered once he was sitting in his darkened living room one afternoon soon after they had moved in, when he heard a pounding at the door. "Spike, Dru, anyone awake?" Sitting there thinking, Willow, it figured it would be Willow. Was she Dru's best friend now or something? ,She was forever coming over in the middle of the day. Not that he slept the day away it was just the principle of it. They were vampires. On the other hand she did take the dogs out so there were fewer accidents in the house. "Hi Spike, where's Dru?" Willow bounded into the room carelessly shutting the door behind her. " Do you mind, I _will_ turn to dust if that hits me." he glared at her and moved further into the shadows vowing to remember to lock the door from now on. " Sorry." Willow threw her apology over her shoulder as she disapeared into the basement. He turned back to the television wishing Dru would slip up and destroy that one. She had been nothing but trouble since he had first met her. The brainy member of the scooby gang. He sat in the livingroom for a while longer letting his anger build at Willow. How dare she come into a vampires house in the middle of the day without an ounce of fear. Getting more annoyed by the second, he finally jumped up ready to go downstairs and give Willow a piece of his mind when they came bounding up the stairs, an assortment of animals following. "Spike, Willow wants to know if we want her old computer, she's getting a new one." Dru had been so excited, conveniently forgetting that she barely knew how to read. "Charity work now Willow?" He was furious, how dare she offer him charity. "What, no. I just...I thought you might like it. It would give you something to do. And...oh...I'm sorry." Willow just stood there, her face as red as her hair. Immediately he was hit with guilt. She was just trying to be nice. "Sorry, I'm not at my best in the daylight. I'd...We'd love it." Swallowing the last of his pride he smiled at her. She brought it over after dark and spent the next six hours teaching him the basics. He loved it, played solitaire on it all night. She taught him how to surf the 'net over the next few nights. He hadn't been bored since. He was quickly surpassing Willow as hacker to the gang. And as much as he liked helping the slayer out when the big monsters were in town he prefered to help Giles and Willow with research the majority of the time. And not only because Angel was always with the slayer. "Okay everyone. I think that's it for tonight. Thanks for coming and we'll see you next week." Spike stretched, pulling himself back into the present. Turning to Dru he helped her up and headed out of the room. Buffy stopped him on the way out, dragging her lap-Angel behind her, "Spike don't forget you're on research this week. Check with your contacts will you? I've got a feeling." Assuring her he would get on the 'net as soon as he got home he finally left the meeting. Smiling to himself, he decided he would drive up to see Antoine tomorrow. To tell him that he was right, that doing good did help him manage the guilt. And, that a reformed vampire's existance could be, if not happy, then at least somewhat amusing. - ------------------- The End. And know, I'll beg for feedback. Please. Please. Please. ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 12 May 1998 16:28:09 EDT From: KylenRevik Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Future Imperfect" -- Chapter Seven See the prologue for disclaimers and notes. Comments, questions, or requests for missing pieces to KylenRevik@aol.com, please. ~ "Part Seven: Divulgence" Place: Chase Residence. Time: May 22nd, 2012. "Cordelia-- Cordelia, please, open the door!" There was no answer. Xander knocked again, harder this time. "Cordelia!" He knew he was probably attracting the attention of everyone who walked by, but somehow he couldn't bring himself to care. "_Cordelia_!" "_Go away_!" she yelled, jerking the door open without warning. Xander stared at her for a moment when he saw the fury burning in her eyes. "Cordelia," he said quietly, "I need to talk to you." She shook her head. "No." She moved to slam the door in his face, but Xander moved first-- and got his foot wedged between the door and its frame. "Cordelia, _please_," he said, trying to force the door to open. She was working as hard as she could to push him out of the door, but in the end, Xander was the stronger of the two, and he managed to push through and into the front hall. Cordelia glared at him from the doorway as he turned back to look at her, wishing there was some way to make up for what he had said the night before. At the same time, though, he hated himself for hoping like that, because he knew he wouldn't feel the same way if it weren't for the fact that he needed her help and needed...well, to use her. He sighed inwardly. As if using Cordelia was anything new, he thought with a certain degree of sarcasm. "Cordelia," he said, wondering where to go from that word. "Go to hell," she snapped. "I can't _believe_ you, Xander Harris-- you haven't changed a _bit_." "Cor--" "You realize, this is breaking in. I can call the police now, and have them come, and arrest you, and so help me God, I'll--" "Cordelia--" "Don't _Cordelia_ me!" she exclaimed. "God _damn_ it, Xander, you think you can say what you said last night and then just march back in here today because you want-- whatever it is you _want_, and then when I say to get away from me you _force_ you way through the door and think _that's all there is to it_?!" She paused, but only long enough to take a quick breath. "Of course, for self- centered _you_, I suppose that's _more_ than enough." Her glare lost a touch of the hot fury, replacing it with a coldness Xander wasn't used to seeing in her. "Get out," she said. "Or so help me, Xander, I'll call the police." He stared for a moment as she turned on her heel and stalked into the kitchen, and a few seconds later he heard her pick the phone up and start dialing. "Cordelia!" he called, taking a few steps after her, "would you just--" He shook his head. "Put that _down_," he said, nodding to the phone. "No," she said coldly, hitting a few of the buttons. "Cordelia, don't make me--" "Make you what?" she snapped. "What, exactly, do you think you're going to do if I don't hang up and let you keep insulting me, hm?" Xander sighed, then reached over and pulled the phone from her hands, pulling the battery covering off the bottom and sticking the batteries in his pocket as she watched in fury. "That," he said. "You--" He caught her wrists as she moved to shove him, doing his best to keep his patience, and knowing that no matter what he thought, Cordelia was probably right-- and besides that, she didn't have any way of knowing he wasn't going say any more choice words about what she had or hadn't done or told him in the past. "I need to ask you a few things," he said quietly, as he gently pushed her onto one of the stools that was arranged around her kitchen table. She glared at him, silent and furious. "Cordelia, please," he said, wondering if there were any way of making her understand why he was suddenly willing to forget the fact that she'd kept a secret so important from him when it really mattered, when he might have been able to save Buffy from death, when he might have been able to _do_ something instead of spend the last ten years miserable. "Let me go," she said. Her voice shook, slightly, and Xander's heart sank when he realized that he must be scaring her. Must be holding her wrists a little too hard. "Will you call the police?" She looked at him a moment, and he could almost see the wheels turning in her head. He was nuts, she must be thinking. Lost his mind and dangerous. Finally, she shook her head, and he let her go. "I'm sorry," he said quietly. She didn't move to get up, to try and leave, or get him out. Only sat there with that cold gaze locked on him. "I hope so," she finally said. "It's just...I need to talk to you." "Funny," she snapped, "and here I thought you had to yell at me, or fling accusations at me, or--" "Cordelia, not now, please. This is important." "You broke into my house and threatened me, it had better be." "I didn't threaten you!" he objected. She rubbed her wrists gently. "It was implied." He sighed. "Cordie, I would never hurt you. I promise." She didn't look as though she believed him. He wondered if she had any idea how much that hurt, seeing her lose faith in him like that in the space of three days, when he had thought they would have been able to just move on and... And what? There was nothing to move on to, he found himself thinking. Nothing, nothing...a big fat load of _nothing_. He sighed. *Way to be positive, Xander,* he thought ruefully. "I need to ask you some things. About Buffy." She shook her head. "No." "Corde--" "Every time," she began calmly, "that I've opened my mouth about her, you wind up screaming at me." She shook her head. "No." "I just need to--" "_No_," Cordelia repeated. "But I just--" "_No_, Xander." Shaking his head, his hand moved into his pockets, pulling out the book she had given him the night before. "Cordelia," he said, and ignored her interruption when she voiced it, "look here, would you?" He flipped the book open to the sheet of paper he had folded over inside it, marking the place where Giles' notes could be found. "Here." She looked at it for a long moment. "What?" she asked. "It's...I said this. Earlier." He shook his head. "And it looks like the kind of thing that..." A pause. "Willow and I saw her earlier. Buffy. On campus." Cordelia stared at him. Her thoughts-- that he was a raving lunatic and she would be lucky if she made it out of here with her life, let alone without telling him what he wanted to know-- were written all over her face. He sighed. "Cordie, I need to know where she was going when she died." "You're nuts," she breathed. "Xander..." "I'm not," he said, though he wasn't so sure of that himself. "Cordelia, please, just tell me where she was going to meet him..." "Xander!" "It's all in this book! All right here, I said the incantation and now if I can get into proximity with her, I'll be able to--" He broke off. Cordelia read over the lines in the book again, quickly, then shook her head. "Do what?" she asked, almost gently. "Xander, it says here that by reciting the incantation, you can talk to someone across the bridge of space and time...but that doesn't mean you'll be able to find her, or even stop her." "But--" "That's what you're going to do, isn't it," Cordelia said, and it wasn't a question. She shook her head. "Or try to do." She sighed. "Xander...you need help." "No I don't," he replied. "Cordelia, listen. If I can find her tonight in the graveyard, then I can stop her from staying, I can save her, then..." He trailed off. "Then what?" she asked. "What happens then?" He shook his head. "I don't know," he said quietly. "But I've got to try. Where was she going to go?" Cordelia shook her head. "No, Xander," she said. "I'm not going to-- this is ridiculous. You're losing your mind. Or something similar." "I'm _not_!" he insisted. "Ask Willow if you have to-- just tell me where she was going to be!" "She was going to be at the west end near the monument," Cordelia breathed after a long moment's hesitation. Then she turned a look on Xander that was so pained, so hurt, that he almost couldn't believe it was coming from her. "Xander, don't do this," she said softly. Xander shook his head. "Why not?" he asked. "There's nothing to lose at this point." "Your _mind_," Cordelia replied, "if you haven't lost it already. She's not going to be there, Xander, this is ludicrous and you shouldn't get your hopes up like this..." "No," he said. "Cordelia..." He sighed, leaned forward, and kissed her softly on the cheek. "I'm sorry. And thank you." "Xander--" she exclaimed, as he moved away. "I can't talk now," he said. "I have to get there. To wait." She shook her head. "But you're not making any sense, Xander, and besides, what if this doesn't work?" He shook his head, not answering because failure wasn't an option here. He had no _choice_ but to succeed. "It will," he said. "But if it doesn't?" she said. "Then what? You really think you'll be able to move on with your life?" "Either way," he said, and his voice was suddenly flat, betraying the deadness inside him when he thought about what he would have to become to live if this didn't work and he couldn't save her, "I have to try." ~ All comments to KylenRevik@aol.com, please. ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 12 May 1998 16:53:03 -0700 From: LadySun Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (part 18) Charlotte Sometimes (part 18) Violent Scene ahead Drusilla murmured delicately in her slumber, awaking slowly... She was reaching for Miss Edith, when she heard the hysterical cries. She knew absently that they belonged to her mother, sadly this hadn't been the first time she'd heard them. "Papa?" Drusilla uttered, groggily as she forced her eyes awake from her sleeping position on the couch. She had to blink a couple times, before she could focus on anything. There were four or five women surrounding her. She immediately thought the worse. "What's the matter here?" She asked, her voice never betraying her frightened feelings as stand up. "What's going-" Drusilla couldn't finish the words as her eyes widened in at the site outside. But the curtains were shut so tightly. She saw nothing, her eyes betrayed, her mind! Her thoughts went straight through that thick curtain. Her poor heart beat in her throat, pounding so loudly that her head began to hurt and thought, she might actually swallow the throbbing muscle. She could hear the women's chatter as they all began to look at the girl oddly. Her body rocked, her breathing became ecstatic. Why did everything seem closer? Louder? Her eyes flooded with the picture her eyes saw. Out the window, her fathers body hung on the tree spread eagle, as though on a crucifix, rather than a tree. His hair was tied to the limbs above as though to keep the head on. Everything was tied to the tree! His throat was gushed in blood and nearly torn off, as though some savage beast had clawed out his throat. She watched as he men tried to climb the high tree to get down the body, and she felt herself becoming sick. Drusilla had to look down, she had to get away from the sickly site. But it didn't matter! Look away, Shut your eyes, claw them out! The image remained! A stunned streak of adrenaline streamed through her weakened body. Her eyes went immediately red, and swollen. But then the tears stopped falling. Dull shock began to over come her hysteria, at the scene before her. It no longer mattered. Everything was black. - -- ~ ` ~ LadySun ~ ` ~ ~ ` ~ Spikette ` Mercenary ~ ` ~ SD - http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html FK - http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/FK/index.html We look before and After, and pine for what is not; our sincerest laughter with some pain is fraught; Our sweetest songs are those that tell the saddest thought...' The Cure Wish) ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 12 May 1998 17:47:08 -0700 From: LadySun Subject: BUFFYFIC: Charlotte Sometimes (part 19) Charlotte Sometimes (part 19) All the family was on their way, everyone was gathered around Isabelle now, as she went hysterical over her husbands death. Drusilla was in shock, she felt no sorrow, no pain, no denial, no inkling of regret. None of these feelings plagued her. Perhaps one. Sickness, she felt sickened at her mothers tears. Isabelle had been forced into the marriage, and like it or not, Dru knew with out a doubt her parents never had loved each other. So she sat upstairs in her room holding Lydia. She had been up there for over three hours, on the pretext of resting. Her only desires were to get away from the family, and their artificial grief. Poor Lydia. She didn't understand what was going on, she knew of her fathers death, Isabelle had so crudely told her. But she didn't really grasp the concept of death. That her father had been hurt severely, displayed for the town to witness. That he would never come back. Never be there for them again. "Dru! What's wrong? Why mustn't we go outside?" Lydia picked Miss Edith off from the bed and began to brush the dolls fair hair. Drusilla had to force herself to open her mouth, to take a breath, to talk to her little sister. She had to force herself to calm, she would feint again she knew, if she didn't get herself under control. Drusilla pushed her body upwards, and she looked at her sister. "Lydia." She said almost sighed, taking a deep breath inwards. Her body was trembling again, and she felt that aggravating nausea she'd just experienced. "Go downstairs to comfort the family, tell them I shall be down stairs after I nap a little" The small girl was about to protest, but one look at her sister reddened eyes told her not to. Instead she went to Drusilla, giving her sister a comforting hug, and leaving Miss Edith in Dru's lap left. - -- ~ ` ~ LadySun ~ ` ~ ~ ` ~ Spikette ` Mercenary ~ ` ~ SD - http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/SD/index.html FK - http://home.earthlink.net/~kbleyle/FK/index.html We look before and After, and pine for what is not; our sincerest laughter with some pain is fraught; Our sweetest songs are those that tell the saddest thought...' The Cure Wish) ------------------------------ End of buffyfic-digest V2 #182 ****************************** To subscribe to buffyfic or buffyfic-digest, send the command subscribe buffyfic-digest or subscribe buffy to majordomo@xmission.com. You will need to go through a confirmation process, and the listowners have to manually approve your subscription request, so it may take some time. To unsubscribe, send email to majordomo@xmission.com with unsubscribe buffyfic-digest or unsubscribe buffyfic in the body. 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