From: owner-buffyfic@lists.xmission.com (buffyfic-digest) To: buffyfic-digest@lists.xmission.com Subject: buffyfic-digest V2 #257 Reply-To: $SENDER Sender: owner-buffyfic@lists.xmission.com Errors-To: owner-buffyfic@lists.xmission.com Precedence: bulk buffyfic-digest Sunday, July 5 1998 Volume 02 : Number 257 In this issue: BUFFYFIC: Repercussions, (14/17) BUFFYFIC: Capeside: the Hellmouth (10/?) BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Fanfic Resources BUFFYFIC: In Opacitatem Habitant Modo (3/?) See the end of the digest for information on (un)subscribing to the buffyfic or buffyfic-digest mailing lists and on how to retrieve back issues. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Sat, 04 Jul 1998 09:18:51 PDT From: "Andrea Newbery" Subject: BUFFYFIC: Repercussions, (14/17) Title: Repercussions part 14. The story was supposed to be only 16 chapters, but it has gotten away from me a bit and now will be 17 chapters. Disclaimers: None of these characters are mine. They are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, the WB, etc... Distribution: Sure, just tell me where. Feedback: Please, good, bad or whatever. To anewbery@hotmail.com Thanks: To Jenn, Rachel and Christine. I really appreciate the help. Sunnydale High School Library August 21, 1998 9:00 p.m. Willow walked quickly towards the library, nervous to be outside alone as the sun set, but unable to stay at home waiting for news any longer. Running her hands through her wet hair she wished she had brought an umbrella. Her worry about Buffy and how things were going with her mother driving her from her house. She still felt as if she should have gone with Buffy, she could have run interference if needed and prevented Buffy's mother from digging to deeply. Entering the schoolyard her thoughts turned to Xander, to what he had done, and how harsh she had been with him. Wishing that things could go back to normal, that she could forgive Xander for his choice. Shrugging her shoulders she walked up the steps into the school, maybe if Xander could ever understand why what he did was wrong there would be hope for them again. Opening the doors to the school she smiled ruefully, not very likely that Xander would ever think Angel dying wasn't a good thing. Shaking off the sudden lump the thought brought to her throat she headed towards the library and the comfort it offered. Slipping through the library doors she let her shoulders relax, enjoying the familiarity of the place. Amazed it still felt like a safe haven after all that happened there in the last few years. But is still was, after everything, it was where they planned and where they recovered. Glancing around at the disarray she shook her head, Giles wouldn't be too happy with whoever left all the books and paper on the table. Heading over to clean it up she caught a glimpse of Giles slumped over asleep in the chair in his office. Smiling at him, glad that he found comfort here also, she walked quietly over to a chair and sat down. Leaning back, she watched the fading sun dance across the ceiling, letting her thoughts relax for a moment. Sitting up abruptly when she heard a familiar clomping in the hallway. Her shoulders tense once again she watched as the door to the library swung open and Buffy entered. Willow stared at her, taking in her wet hair, mud soaked clothes and the strange expression on her face. Noticing that the mud-covered jacket was Angel's, she wondered if that was a good sign or not. Buffy strolled towards Willow, her face a mixture of jubilation and despair. Standing nervously Willow moved towards her, her eyes focused on Buffy's mud splattered clothes. "W-What happened?" Inwardly cursing herself for the slight tremble in her voice. Buffy glanced down at her clothes then smiling she looked back to Willow. "I slew." Buffy's voice was biting, "Vampires? Remember? Sacred duty?" Looking at Willow like she was crazy, Buffy threw herself into a chair and stared intently at her fingernails. Willow swallowed, hoping Buffy had woken Giles, relieved when she heard movement behind her. Turning slightly she saw Giles ambling from his office, his face confused and still sleepy. Buffy glanced at Giles, not saying anything then back to her nails. Swallowing her nervousness Willow walked closer to Buffy, sitting down in a chair next to her. "Buffy, is that it? Cause you look a little...um...Giles?" Willow turned to Giles, not knowing if she should press Buffy. Giles just shrugged his shoulders at her and continued standing there watching Buffy. Nodding her head she turned back to Buffy, "Um...nothing else happened? How did it go with your mother?" "Great." Buffy smiled brightly at Willow, but her eyes were unsettled, "Mom's great. Very understanding. You know, cause I'm the slayer and I sent my boyfriend to Hell." Buffy was suddenly very interested in a ring she wore on her hand, Willow stared at it, realizing it was the one Angel had given her. Her eyes slid over to Giles to see if he noticed then turned back to Buffy. She struggled not to stare at the ring, uncertain if the sudden reemergence of both the jacket and the ring meant Buffy was getting better or worse. Buffy spoke softly, her eyes still fixated on her hand. "Oh...I ran into Xander and Cordelia over by Angel's apartment." Her voice was coated in bitterness, softening only when she spoke Angel's name. Willow and Giles looked at each other and back to Buffy, Willow trying to subdue the surge of pity she felt for both Xander and Buffy. Buffy watched them, her face bitterly amused, "No worries. Xander's still living. I held myself back." Her eyes glittered dangerously as she said the words, her mouth tight. Staring back at her ring again, she twisted it on her finger, a soft smile around her lips. Taking a deep breath she looked back up at them, " I feel better, stronger. So Giles, I'm thinking we should get back to work. Any new terrible things on the way? I'm in the mood to fight evil." Giles stared at her, stuttering out, "N-No. I..I, well, I'll have to get my books." Turning he marched into his office, leaving Willow and Buffy alone. Willow staring stunned at Buffy and Buffy leaning back in her chair, apparently totally relaxed. Willow tried not to speak, to let Buffy deal with things however she could, but failed, she had to know why Buffy was seemingly so much more Buffy. Taking a breath she spoke, "Buffy? How...Why? How are you doing this? Just this afternoon you were so...." "Fragile?" Buffy's voice was derisive, "Weak? Hiding from reality? Maybe yelling at Xander was good for me, I feel focused now. Willow," Her voice lowered, speaking confidentially, "I really lost it when I saw Cordelia and Xander together. They looked so in love. And there I was, on my way into Angel's to say good-bye to him. I wanted him dead Willow. I was crazy with rage, but after I told him off. I don't know." She looked at Willow her face confused, "I ran to the graveyard, I was so full of rage. And I found a vampire there, and fought him. Then I lay in the mud and cried, but somehow it all seems better now. I mean, I know what I did to Angel. Don't worry, I'm not hiding any more. But I also know I had no choice. Xander stole that." Her voice filled with rage for a moment as she said Xander's name and then sighing she continued, shaking her head, " No, I can't blame Xander for everything, as good as it felt to release some of my anger on him. I know what happened isn't Xander's fault. It's mine. It always has been and it always will be. But, I can deal with it. I can do my duty. I can remember A-Angel. I am not weak." "No," Willow smiled at her, "You're not weak. But, Buffy, it's not your fault. It just happened, 'Kay?" She stared at Buffy, unable to believe that the frozen girl from this morning was the same person. Turning she watched Giles walk back into the room, his arms full of books, as if suddenly things were back to normal. He walked over to the table, pushing some of the clutter that were already there aside. A piece of paper fluttered to the floor and Willow leaned over and picked it up, glancing at it quickly before placing it back on the table. Then as she realized what it said, she grabbed it again, her heart pounding. Standing up she walked away from Giles and Buffy so they couldn't see her expression as she looked down at what was written, in Xander's handwriting on the page. She closed her eyes, trying to keep her sudden dread from her face and turned back to Giles and Buffy. Staring at them, she opened her mouth to once again alter their lives. "Um...Oh God. Giles, Buffy. I think Xander is doing something really stupid." She took a deep breath and held the paper out to Giles, avoiding Buffy's eyes. She watched Giles read it, watched the fear streak across his face. Looking up he ignored Buffy, his eyes meeting Willow's, at her nod he turned to Buffy. "It..um, it appears that Xander has found a way to open a door to Hell." His voice was worried. Willow watched Buffy, to see her reaction. She sat, unmoving staring at Giles, a thousand emotions traveling through her face, hope, fear, terror, worry. Willow reached her hand out towards Buffy, moving to stand directly in front of her. "We have to help him. Stop him." Willow's voice was pleading, "Xander can't do this. Buffy, do you understand?" She stared intently at Buffy, understanding then that Xander was still very important to her, no matter what he did, or how much he betrayed her, she would always love him. Buffy nodded slowly, looking at Giles. "I'll stop Xander, but you have to promise to help me go. After Xander is okay. Giles, I want to go. I can save Angel. I can make it better." Giles shook his head, "Buffy, no. I-I can't help you do it. There is no way Xander can do it. I've never heard of a person going into Hell and returning." Willow looked at both of them like they were insane, "Have you guys forgotten what happens when Xander plays with spells? Terrible, bad things. We have to stop him." Her arms were flailing as she spoke, pointing at Buffy, then turning to Giles she continued, " And Buffy's right Giles, you have to help her. Angel has a soul, we can't leave him there. Not if there is a way for him to come back." She stopped, breathing heavily, her heart racing. Giles was silent for a moment, his face surprised then rubbing the bridge of his nose he nodded, "Yes. We'll look into the spell. And if it's safe then we can try it." Shaking his head he walked over to the other books that had been left on the table and began shuffling through them. Willow turned to Buffy, needing to know her response. She was looking at her ring, an almost hopeful expression on her face. Willow tapped her on the arm, "Well?" Buffy looked surprised at Willow's impatient expression. Smiling at her she said, "Willow, calm down. Xander won't try this on his own. He'll come to either you or Giles for help first. He's not doing it right now anyway, he's with Cordelia." They both turned as Giles slammed a book onto the table, cursing under his breath. Willow spoke first, "What?" Giles looked up, his face anxious, "Buffy, what was the name of the demon you met in my apartment?" "Whistler, why?" Buffy looked at him, her face confused. Willow just stared at both of them, feeling her stomach sinking, her pulse racing once again. Giles stared at a piece of paper on the table, speaking quietly. "Because his name is written on a piece of paper in Cordelia's handwriting." Willow tensed as Buffy jumped out of her seat and raced over to Giles. She felt as if she was watching from very far away as Buffy's face turned from hopefulness to fear and she started talking loudly to Giles, her hands waving in the air. Gasping, Willow struggled for air, trying to say something, anything, to make them go stop Xander and this demon, to find Xander before he got himself killed, or trapped in Hell. "ANGEL'S" Buffy's voice cut through the fog surrounding her, Buffy's face suddenly understanding, "He's doing it at Angel's. That's why they were on his street. Giles, that was hours ago. We've got to go. Willow?" Buffy turned to her, suddenly noticing Willow's ashen face, walking over to her Buffy grabbed her hand. "I'll get him Willow. I promise. Xander's gonna be fine." Buffy let go of her hand and Willow watched as she raced out of the door, calling behind her for them to meet her there. Turning to Giles, she tried to control her fear, still struggling for air. Giles grabbed her as she swayed, pushing her into a chair, her head between her knees. Rubbing her head he spoke soothingly to her, telling her that things would be okay, that Buffy would stop him. She listened to his words, not believing any of them as her head cleared. Sitting up slowly, trying to keep the room in focus and not think of what Xander was doing. She stood, holding onto Giles for support, telling herself to be strong for Xander's sake. Forcing her mind to go blank, she hurried out of the door, Giles close behind her, praying that Buffy would get there in time. ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 4 Jul 1998 18:38:58 -0700 From: taygeta@juno.com (Charity C. T.) Subject: BUFFYFIC: Capeside: the Hellmouth (10/?) TITLE: Capeside: the Hellmouth #10 Almost Full Moon AUTHOR: Taygeta E-MAIL: taygeta@juno.com DISTRIBUTION: Sure...just tell me where it's gonna go. RATING: PG SERIES: A Dawson's Creek/Buffy Crossover DISCLAIMER: The characters and any other reference to Dawson's Creek are the property of, creator, Kevin Williamson. The characters portrayed and in reference to Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to its creator Joss Whedon, and it's owners Mutant Enemy Productions, Kuzui Enterprises, Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox. In other words, they do not belong to me and I am just borrowing them. No copyright infringement is intended. ************************** Capeside: the Hellmouth #10 Almost Full Moon By: Taygeta A long, loud howl echoed in the night, casting an even stranger feeling in the already hazy atmosphere of the Capeside graveyard. It was bad enough that the full moon was on fast approach…tomorrow. And since it was the day before the full moon, the former Sunnydale residents were a little bit on edge when they heard this particular sound. "Uh…what was that?" Xander asked Buffy, the first words said between them after the Slayerette troop had split up for night patrol, in which they had somehow gotten partnered up with each other. "'Cause whatever it is…it's giving me the major wiggins." "Do you think it's possible that Capeside's got a werewolf…like back home?" she asked glancing at him, "I mean, if Oz was Sunnydale's wolfie guy what if there's another…wolfie guy just a Capeside one?" "And it comes to mind…what if it's a wolfie girl…who is neither meek nor girlie-girl, and equals a certain blonde slayer girl in strength?" he replied recalling a statement Willow had made during the werewolf scare back home. "It's probably nothing," the slayer said with a doubtful tone, "Just some stray in the graveyard." The moment she finished saying that a long, loud howl rang through the night, again, and this time it was followed by a scream. "That sounded like Joey!" Xander said with a voice of concern. "Something's happened…I knew I shouldn't have agreed to let them come and patrol!" fumed Buffy guiltily. "Hey," he said looking at her with a soft expression, "Buffy, it's not your fault…they knew the risks…they wanted to help. Come on, let's go find Joey." She smiled a thanks for his concern and he grinned in return before they ran through the cemetery to where Dawson and Joey were suppose to have been patrolling. "Oh God," Jen said, as she and Angel followed behind Xander and Buffy and they all say Joey's bloody arm, "What happened?" Dawson stood up from her side and said, "Something just came out of the bush after we heard that howl and it attacked her. My game face was an instantaneous reaction on my part, and with much luck, it got away, but not before it bit her arm slightly. I was able to stop the blood…it was good thing that monster wasn't able to penetrate too deeply into her skin with his bite." Xander and Buffy looked at each other worriedly and finally Buffy gulped before asking the inevitable question, "Dawson…did you see a werewolf?" "What?" he asked in a surprised tone, "A werewolf? Do those things exist?" "Hey…shouldn't we be concerned if Joey's okay or not?" Angel responded over the crowd of voices. "You're questioning the existence of a canine-related monster when you yourself is a member of the Undead Americans and with a soul I might add?" Joey said as she gave Dawson a look. "Never mind…she's fine," Angel said with a laugh. "You guys better take Joey to Giles and Ms. Calendar…I'll stick around for awhile for night patrol," Buffy said with a sigh. After walking a few steps away from the slayer, Xander stopped them, "Hey guys, I think I should stay and keep her company. You guys go on ahead, okay?" "Stay now instead of then because she would have made you go away, huh?" Jen said with a light smile before they walked away from him. Buffy looked up when she heard the rustling of the leaves, her heart raced in the thought that it might be the werewolf. She sighed when she saw that it was only Xander, and although she was realized, her heart was still going a little too fast for her comfort. "What are you doing here, Xander?" she said, "I thought I told you to go with them." "I figured that it didn't take 4 people to bring Joey to G-man," he said, "Besides, you think I'm going to leave you here by yourself with a possible, as Joey put it, 'canine-related creature' runnin' loose?" "Giles speak, they have it down cold…how is that humanly possible?" she responded, purposely changing the subject. Xander paused and thought, "Okay…they are not normal. I mean the usage of big words can make one seem entirely over verbose…did I just say what I think I just said?" She smiled, "I think we've been hanging around the Capeside locals just a little too much." "What do you think about hanging out with a Sunnydale local…I mean in doing something that's on the verge of the less undead?" he said glancing at her surprised expression. Before Buffy could reply, her smile faded and her eyes noted some swift movement in the foliage, and she stood up. Xander followed her lead and looked around carefully and then both slayer and slayerette registered the image almost simultaneously. "Werewolf…" he heard her mutter under her breath. They eyed the creature as it slowly approached them, and as it drew nearer and nearer, Xander kept glancing from it to her in uncertainty, and finally he said in a low voice, "Buffy…what are you doing?" "This werewolf…I'm not getting the bad vibes I got before - " Buffy began to explain until suddenly, something strange jumped in front of them. "Get away from him…you don't understand!" The creature was obviously a female…tall and slim in form. She had thick, dark brown hair that flowed long and wavy behind her. If it weren't for the points on her ears, her tiny fangs, and the mountain man hair that coated part of her arms and legs lightly she could have passed very well as a young woman. As they took in the sight of this unfamiliar figure, a light of understanding turned itself on inside of the slayer's mind. "Joey?" _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] ------------------------------ Date: Sun, 5 Jul 1998 08:10:14 -0400 (EDT) From: Betsy Vera Subject: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Fanfic Resources (posted with Jill's permission) Just a quick note to say...Fanfic Resources is back online (finally!). A big "thank you" to everyone who updated their listing after last month's e-mail from me. That really helped me get the site up and running again. I think the redesign is going to make things easier all around. btw, I know I'm missing a *ton* of fanfic listings. If you have or know of a website or fanzine that has fanfic, please let me know about it (via private e-mail, of course) so I can add it. http://bentley.simplenet.com Thanks all. *--------------------------------------------------------------------* | Betsy Vera | Fanfic Resources is back: | | bentley@umich.edu | | | bentley.simplenet.com | http://bentley.simplenet.com | *--------------------------------------------------------------------* ------------------------------ Date: Sun, 5 Jul 1998 10:41:55 -0700 From: taygeta@juno.com (Charity C. T.) Subject: BUFFYFIC: In Opacitatem Habitant Modo (3/?) TITLE: In Opacitatem Habitant Modo #3 Xander AUTHOR: Taygeta E-MAIL: taygeta@juno.com FEEDBACK: Pretty please with a cherry on top! DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just tell me first. RATING: PG-13 DESCRIPTION: Buffy is blind, various POVs DISCLAIMER: The characters any such reference to Buffy the Vampire Slayer television series belong to their creator, Joss Whedon, and their owners, Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions, Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox. In other words, they do not belong to me. Copyright infringement not intended. ****************************** In Opacitatem Habitant Modo #3 Xander By: Taygeta The door closed behind Giles when he left, a purposely-soundless exit for the sake of the slayer. After much training on her part, and much idly watching on mine, she had finally allowed herself to rest…or rather her body was forcing her to do so. The tired expression that lay dormant on her face seemed eerily normal to me somehow, and the look of serenity that accompanied it seemed like such a rare calm to my eyes. Closing my eyes, I see nothing but the dark crevices of my mind, and I wonder how I could live in this…this darkness…this black abyss…with the knowledge that it might be forever. Yet, light even penetrates and seeps itself into this tried barrier, hers is a world without even the faintness of the glowing miracle. My eyes open and immediately I smile at the sight of her face…her expression…a beauty beyond words, found in more than just face, but more in who she was at heart. Her determination, her strength…her love for her friends…the miracle of the beauty within. "How can you be so strong, Buffy?" I whispered in the quiet, "The nightmares…the fears…the dark, nothing seems to faze you for long. I know you're scared just like us, but we have the one thing that you don't have…you. I think that's what keeps all of going on…the knowledge that you're there…fighting for us as well as yourself. I just hope you know, Buffy, that no matter what, we'll be there for you, too." I still remember how Druscilla's hand had struck her face, tearing at her eyes like a mad woman, when she had killed her beloved Spike. The scars that evidenced this rage had healed, and therefore its permanent aftermath, her lost sight, baffled the doctors…bewildered everyone else…except us…who knew and were the only ones who would have believed anyway. The images still comes back to me in nightmares…as if my brain were a VCR on a constant rewind and play… "You killed him…you killed Spike!" Druscilla had said angrily as tears streamed down her pallid complexion. She knocked me down, pushed me with all the might of a singular powerful hand, causing me to collide with the hard, stone wall. My head throbbed and a healing head wound had torn open, causing blood to stream out of my head. Reality…unreality…all was a haze, until I was able concentrate my eyes to one portion of the room…where Druscilla and Buffy stood alone. "You killed him!" the vampire bemoaned repetitively. Without warning, she lunged at the unprepared Slayer. Her hands were a blur of fingers, nails, and the red-violet velvet fabric of her dress as I fell back into unconsciousness, the last thing I could hear…the only thing I could hear was Buffy…screaming for her life… I shudder every time I reach this point. It is this point where I wake up fearing that she was dead although I knew she had survived. It was the same every time and every time was becoming five…six…times daily…during class…during sleep…I never know when it's going to come at me…much like Druscilla attacked Buffy. "Xander?" a tired voice pulled me out of my thoughts and I noticed that Buffy had woken up after only a fifteen-minute name, "What time is it?" "Yeah…it's almost ten…how did you know it was me?" I couldn't help but ask as I looked at her blank eyes. She smiled lightly, "You're cologne…it's a pretty distinct scent in the library…I mean, I doubt Giles would be the kinda guy to be sporting…hmm…Hugo Boss…wasn't it Polo Sport before?" "Yeah…it was…before Cordy gave me a bottle of Hugo Boss for no apparent reason…although at first, I was kinda wondering if she thought I stunk," I joked as usual. Her smile, although tired, broadened slightly, "I kinda liked it the way it was before…not that you stink or anything, now, although one has to take into mind the days of the hyena." "I told you…I had no control over that…no memory whatsoever…" I began to protest, but I was interrupted by a sound at the door. "Um…hey," Cordelia said as she approached us and she promptly kissed me on the cheek and I automatically did the same with a grin. "Hi," I responded. "You ready to go home, Buffy?" she asked, and then I remembered that Giles had arranged for Cordy to drive her home, since she was the only slayerette besides Oz that had a car. Wearily, she stood up and replied, "Uh…yeah…I'll see you tomorrow, Xander." After they left, I sat in the library waiting for Giles, Willow, and Oz to return to Slayer Headquarters. The room was quiet and a singular light beside me glowed brightly in the dark room. I turned it off and sat there in the darkness and the silence…a glimpse into her world…and then I turned the light back on…something she will never be able to do. _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] ------------------------------ End of buffyfic-digest V2 #257 ****************************** To subscribe to buffyfic or buffyfic-digest, send the command subscribe buffyfic-digest or subscribe buffy to majordomo@xmission.com. You will need to go through a confirmation process, and the listowners have to manually approve your subscription request, so it may take some time. To unsubscribe, send email to majordomo@xmission.com with unsubscribe buffyfic-digest or unsubscribe buffyfic in the body. Back issues of this digest can be found at: ftp://ftp.xmission.com/pub/lists/buffyfic/archive/ Dalton Spence has also provided an index of the buffyfic archive at: http://www.hwcn.org/~ag775/BUFFYFIC.HTM For help, contact Jill Kirby (jtkirby@mcs.com) or sah (romana@mindspring.com)